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Things NOT to Say to a Naked Man

• That's it?
• Wow - look at all the hair on your back!
• Maybe you should start going to the gym more.
• That was fine, dear...pass me my vibrator?
• That's a shame, maybe we should grab a video instead?
• Wake me when it's over, ok?
• I think the condom's too big.
• You want me to what?!?
• Well, that explains the padded pants.
• My husband's in the Marines. He's due home any day now.
• Is that a toupee?
• No. Surgery might be able to help.
• Not until you've showered.
• Your brother's bigger.
• Your best friend's better.
• Are you done yet?
• You might want to see a doctor about that.
• Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!
• Gee i didn't think it was that cold
• Just like your father

*ponders, looking for the significant meaning behind that list*

Nope, no luck. I liked the last two though.

So, tell me, when you were in the Navy...how many of those did you hear? Or is that where you got them from?

RogueIce wrote:*ponders, looking for the significant meaning behind that list*

Nope, no luck. I liked the last two though.

So, tell me, when you were in the Navy...how many of those did you hear? Or is that where you got them from?

I think they come from the Ensign's Guide to Promotion

Tsyroc wrote:

RogueIce wrote:*ponders, looking for the significant meaning behind that list*

Nope, no luck. I liked the last two though.

So, tell me, when you were in the Navy...how many of those did you hear? Or is that where you got them from?

I think they come from the Ensign's Guide to Promotion

"Ba-da, ching!"

Just for us brave SWOrriors of course, right?

*begins plotting revenge while muttering "Damn enlisted..."*

You forgot the classic "gee i didn't think it was that cold"

*Just like your father...*

RogueIce wrote:

Tsyroc wrote:

RogueIce wrote:*ponders, looking for the significant meaning behind that list*

Nope, no luck. I liked the last two though.

So, tell me, when you were in the Navy...how many of those did you hear? Or is that where you got them from?

I think they come from the Ensign's Guide to Promotion

"Ba-da, ching!"

Just for us brave SWOrriors of course, right?

*begins plotting revenge while muttering "Damn enlisted..."*

::enlisted go on strike and ship full of inexperienced yuppie officers sinks/blows up/kills them like the Event Horizon, because they can't operate any of the machinery without us::

::cue laughing of senior enlisted who are tired of the aforementioned yuppie officers with less experience shitting on them::

"Aww, it's so cute"

I walked in here, expecting to have heard some of those things already....

Remember boys and girls, the Navy gives you the Gay. Don't let anyone tell you different.

I had the misfortune of a female saying something along the lines of AnimeJet's comment once. And people ask why I have no self-confidence with women

Lonestar wrote:I had the misfortune of a female saying something along the lines of AnimeJet's comment once. And people ask why I have no self-confidence with women

At least it never happened in the showers...did it?

AnimeJet wrote:"Aww, it's so cute"

When a guy hears that coming from a woman who is currently viewing him naked he must assume that she is refering to his ass.

Is it in yet?

"You call that an erection?"

InnerBrat wrote:Is it in yet?

That can be taken another way in which the comment isn't too flatering for the lady involved either.

InnerBrat wrote:Is it in yet?

LOL

If I heard that suicide would be a step up...

Talk about destroying some guy!

You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.

Zaia wrote:You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.

now that's just mean.

Vertigo1 wrote:

Zaia wrote:You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.

now that's just mean.

Ever siad that, sweetie?

It's just I know a Chica who has actually uttered the sentence i posted above...

InnerBrat wrote:Ever siad that, sweetie?

It's just I know a Chica who has actually uttered the sentence i posted above...

I think your comment has been voiced many times in real life.

...but not by anyone I know...or have met.

Zaia wrote:

Vertigo1 wrote:

Zaia wrote:You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.

now that's just mean.

If you ever said that to me, I'd prolly have to tickle you to death.