Court told of sex with traffic cone

MKSheppard · Post by **MKSheppard** » 2002-10-17 01:31pm

http://www.news.scotsman.com/scotland.cfm?id=1145092002

Court told of sex with traffic cone

AMY DEVINE

A MAN rolled about on the ground having sex with a traffic cone as stunned

youths watched in disbelief, a court heard yesterday.

Ross Watt, 33, had sex with the bollard only because he couldn’t get his hands on his favoured sex object - a pair of trainers. Watt had gone round teenager drivers gathered at an Edinburgh beauty spot asking if they would sell him their trainers.

But when they refused he turned his attention to the orange and white traffic cone and simulated sex with it. Watt was egged on by the crowd who shouted encouragement, urging him to "give it some".

Charles Robertson, 23, a mechanic, was one of about a dozen youths present on Calton Hill, when Watt made his bizarre request. Mr Robertson told Edinburgh Sheriff Court: "He first came along and spoke to us when we were in our cars.

"He approached us and asked if we had any shoes or trainers for sale. He was going from car to car asking this."

Watt, of Robertson Court, Edinburgh, then started rubbing his genitals up and down the traffic cone.

He said the incident carried on for about 15 or 20 minutes. Police were alerted to the late night incident on 3 September at Calton Hill and arrived to find Watt replacing a traffic cone by a gatepost just yards from the Scottish Executive’s St Andrew’s House.

His defence lawyer, Andy Gilbertson, suggested to Sheriff Mhairi Stephen that if his client had been performing at an Edinburgh Festival Fringe show and people were egging him on that it would have been acceptable, but then retracted his opinion.

Watt was found guilty of acting in a disorderly manner by simulating sexual intercourse with a traffic cone and placing members of the public in a state of fear and alarm on 3 September at Calton Hill and committing a breach of the peace.

Sheriff Stephen: "I take the view that the unpleasant and disgusting character of your behaviour that evening in a public area is behaviour that amounts to a breach of the peace."

Sentence was deferred for four weeks until reports are prepared.

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2002-10-17 01:36pm

Wow, that's incrdibly fucked up. God damn where do these people come from?

Knife · Post by **Knife** » 2002-10-17 01:37pm

Ummm, yuck!

Post by **Kuja** » 2002-10-17 01:39pm

OMFG.

MKSheppard · Post by **MKSheppard** » 2002-10-17 01:40pm

Stormbringer wrote:Wow, that's incrdibly fucked up. God damn where do these people come from?

SCOTLAND

EmperorMing · Post by **EmperorMing** » 2002-10-17 01:41pm

This is what hookers are for...

Knife · Post by **Knife** » 2002-10-17 01:44pm

EmperorMing wrote:This is what hookers are for...

Personaly I perfer concubines but.....

I mean

geeze get a room and then fuck the orange cone.

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2002-10-17 01:47pm

At least it wasn't a vacuum cleaner.

Post by **Colonel Olrik** » 2002-10-17 01:51pm

Knife wrote: I mean geeze get a room and then fuck the orange cone.

Give him a break. The man was in need. He couldn't wait.

It's not as if he harmed anybody.

Seriously, he will not suffer any legal consequence. Someone dum enough to perform a stunt like this is already outside the realm of reality.

At the most, some considerate people will give a nice long vacation in a rest house.

Knife · Post by **Knife** » 2002-10-17 01:54pm

Colonel Olrik wrote:
Knife wrote: I mean geeze get a room and then fuck the orange cone.
Give him a break. The man was in need. He couldn't wait.

It's not as if he harmed anybody.

Seriously, he will not suffer any legal consequence. Someone dum enough to perform a stunt like this is already outside the realm of reality.

At the most, some considerate people will give a nice long vacation in a rest house.

So in the end, he will get a room.

Post by **Colonel Olrik** » 2002-10-17 02:01pm

Knife wrote: So in the end, he will get a room.

Probally yes. Can't say I envy him, though

Newtonian Fury · Post by **Newtonian Fury** » 2002-10-17 02:03pm

As disturbing as this story is, I find it very amusing. There aren't enough crazy people where I'm from...

Knife · Post by **Knife** » 2002-10-17 02:03pm

Colonel Olrik wrote:
Knife wrote: So in the end, he will get a room.
Probally yes. Can't say I envy him, though

I don't want to envy him, just don't want to see him fuck inanimate objects or even animated objects unless of coarse she's hot.

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2002-10-17 03:07pm

Watt was found guilty of acting in a disorderly manner by simulating sexual intercourse with a traffic cone and placing members of the public in a state of fear and alarm on 3 September at Calton Hill and committing a breach of the peace.

Hell, I know that'd place me in a state of fear and alarm...

Post by **haas mark** » 2002-10-17 03:46pm

O.o;;

starfury · Post by **starfury** » 2002-10-17 03:48pm

OMG, that is weird

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2002-10-17 04:09pm

A TRAFFIC CONE?

How sich can people get? First, it's little kids. Then, it's animals. Now, people are having with a traffic cones because they couldn't find a "trainer"?

Hey, he should keep this up! If he stays away from with actual women, he'll never reproduce, and that's one less idiot on the planet!

Alex Moon · Post by **Alex Moon** » 2002-10-17 04:19pm

Just more proof that the universe is one long twisted joke.

Post by **haas mark** » 2002-10-17 04:22pm

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi wrote:Hey, he should keep this up! If he stays away from with actual women, he'll never reproduce, and that's one less idiot on the planet!

Now, if only we could do that to the REST of the idiots in the world...now THAT woul be an accomplishment.

Utsanomiko · Post by **Utsanomiko** » 2002-10-17 04:34pm

Jeebus... I don't know what's weirder: the fact that he publicly humped a traffic cone, or that his preferred sexual 'partner' was a pair of sneakers.

Tosho · Post by **Tosho** » 2002-10-17 05:12pm

I heard about this on the radio, pretty damn funny if you ask me.

salm · Post by **salm** » 2002-10-17 05:49pm

LOL
That guy is cool!

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2002-10-17 06:14pm

It's like the Scotland version of American Pie, only it's Scottish Traffic Cone.

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2002-10-17 08:50pm

Traffic cones huh? I can't say I'm surprised since I've seen it in a porno I screened in my customs job already, but damn, fucking the cone with a crowd looking on? That's pretty far out.

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2002-10-17 09:11pm

Wicked Pilot wrote:It's like the Scotland version of American Pie, only it's Scottish Traffic Cone.

LOL.