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Golf Joke

Posted: 2004-05-24 05:28pm
by Tsyroc
A man staggers into an emergency room with a concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened.


"Well, it was like this", said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole we both sliced our balls into a pasture of cows. We went to look for them, and while I was rooting around I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough there was a golf ball with my wife's monogram on it stuck right in the middle of the cow's rear. That's when I made my big mistake."

"What did you do?" asks the doctor. "Well, I lifted the cow's tail and yelled to my wife."........"Hey, this looks like yours!".......I don't remember much after that."

Posted: 2004-05-24 05:34pm
by The Aliens
I hope that woman is arrested for assault with a weapon, as golf clubs can be dangerous weapons. It's people like her- using personal insults as justification for life threatening attacks- that are truly dangerous to society. :wink:

Posted: 2004-05-24 05:37pm
by Faram
The Aliens wrote:I hope that woman is arrested for assault with a weapon, as golf clubs can be dangerous weapons. It's people like her- using personal insults as justification for life threatening attacks- that are truly dangerous to society.
I think your humor chip is broken, go to 7-11 and buy a clue instead.

Posted: 2004-05-24 05:40pm
by The Aliens
I'm obviously being sarcastic. Perhaps I should have added a little picture to that to aid in your comprehension?

Posted: 2004-05-24 05:43pm
by Faram
The Aliens wrote:I'm obviously being sarcastic. Perhaps I should have added a little picture to that to aid in your comprehension?
Hmm I seem to have lost my sarcasm detector, might be because it's late and I should be doing other things instead.

Posted: 2004-05-24 06:11pm
by Howedar
The Aliens wrote:I'm obviously being sarcastic. Perhaps I should have added a little picture to that to aid in your comprehension?
Yes, that is the common practice here. Perhaps you shall be more careful in the future.

Posted: 2004-05-24 07:21pm
by Montcalm
ROTFLMFFCAO :lol: :lol: :lol:

Posted: 2004-05-24 07:56pm
by Gandalf
Hehehe.

Golf ethics: What do you do when your golf partner says he's found his ball in the rough. But you know he's lying because you've got it in your pocket?

Posted: 2004-05-24 09:36pm
by The Aliens
Howedar wrote:
The Aliens wrote:I'm obviously being sarcastic. Perhaps I should have added a little picture to that to aid in your comprehension?
Yes, that is the common practice here. Perhaps you shall be more careful in the future.
I was under the impression that was for new users, about whom no-one knows political affiliation, or for instances in which the sarcasm is not blindingly obvious. If I post a rsponse like that to what is a sel-proclaimed joke from the title, isn't it apparent to all concerned the comment was facetious?

Posted: 2004-05-24 09:42pm
by Defiant
Gandalf wrote:Hehehe.

Golf ethics: What do you do when your golf partner says he's found his ball in the rough. But you know he's lying because you've got it in your pocket?
That's easy. Make him very familiar with your driver as you whack him upside the head with it.

Posted: 2004-05-24 09:52pm
by Howedar
The Aliens wrote:
Howedar wrote:Yes, that is the common practice here. Perhaps you shall be more careful in the future.
I was under the impression that was for new users, about whom no-one knows political affiliation, or for instances in which the sarcasm is not blindingly obvious. If I post a rsponse like that to what is a sel-proclaimed joke from the title, isn't it apparent to all concerned the comment was facetious?
1. I have no idea who the fuck you are.
2. We definately have people here stupid enough to not be joking.
3. Evidently, you do indeed need to provide some evidence you are kidding.

Posted: 2004-05-24 09:55pm
by The Aliens
Howedar wrote:
The Aliens wrote:
Howedar wrote:Yes, that is the common practice here. Perhaps you shall be more careful in the future.
I was under the impression that was for new users, about whom no-one knows political affiliation, or for instances in which the sarcasm is not blindingly obvious. If I post a rsponse like that to what is a sel-proclaimed joke from the title, isn't it apparent to all concerned the comment was facetious?
1. I have no idea who the fuck you are.
2. We definately have people here stupid enough to not be joking.
3. Evidently, you do indeed need to provide some evidence you are kidding.
Fine, edited. And I'm The Aliens, nice to meet you. :)