Upcoming Movies

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2004-05-27 04:20pm

I was bored and decided to overview some coming movie trailers as I noticed them in Empire lately, so here are some brief thoughts on some selections.

The Village

M. Night Shyamalan's fourth major film after the decidedly mixed results that came with Signs. This time, the story revolves around Joaquin Phoenix from the previous film as he inhabits a village in Philadelphia again it seems that has a pact with creatures in the surrounding forest.

Only one day they find marks on their house doors. A warning? Well, the trailer doesn't show much, but I can assume that it will be creepily like Sleepy Hollow meets Aliens, oh, and the trademark surprise ending apparently doesn't come with this film, though that could be misinformation.

The Incredibles

Pixar. It's a Pixar film and that's all that needs to be said, other than Samuel L. Jackson is in this one along with a whole load of other superheroes who are followed around as they save the world time and time and time... again. I expect loads of good rips on comic book lore and generally cool animation.

Collateral

Michael Mann's newest venture sees Tom Cruise act as a hitman doing his rounds with an unsuspecting cabbie in downtown LA. Typical Mann style directing is evident in the trailer and it may be as action packed in the same vein as Heat. The fact that it's Cruise may drive some away, but given Mann hasn't flopped yet I'll be looking forward to it as will my brother, a rabid Mann-phile (that doesn't sound right).

Around The World In 80 Days

Quite how they got Steve Coogan, Jackie Chan and Ah-nuld in the same film I'll never know. But they did and it looks to be a fun flick with Coogan making a proper bigscreen debut thanks to Disney here and having his humour seen by all. Jackie Chan is self-explanatory, but the cameo by Arnie wasn't expected, though it's nice to see him take time to do this.

Comedy + martial arts and loads of Wild Wild West style inventions has me hooked.

Thunderbirds

Oh no. What have they done to this classic show? I got worried when I saw the teaser last year on the Hulk DVD. I got even more concerned by the fact that the director, a little known Jon Frakes, hadn't seen a single episode of the series until he took the project up.

All I can say is, the craft look totally out of the ordinary, they set it in 2010 which is totally unrealistic given the series takes place in the 2060s and the cast all all adolescent Yanks from a Spy Kids audition reject file. If Bill Paxton can't say "how do I get out of this chickenshit outfit?" in it, then it's at a loss. I'm not optimistic. NO ONE fucks with Gerry Anderson's designs.

I, Robot

I've seen mixed feelings on here and elsewhere about this. Having just seen the trailer, I'm unsure. It looks like it's trying to be Minority Report and Terminator as well as hints of one of the better Animatrix shorts. The iPod style robots look silly, though I suspect Apple would design something as awkward as that anyway and sell it for thousands so the people unsure about their fashion can make a statement much like any other Mac user (sorry, I never liked their stuff).

I haven't read the book and the last rendition for screen of Asimov, Bicentennial Man wasn't exactly eye-opening unless you get into a seething rage at Robin Williams' jokes. But I'm willing to give it a try and at least it looks to be action packed and not just a Bladerunner clone. I notice another concept product placement like with the Lexus in Minority Report only it's an Audi this time as Smith's car. The future is one big advert if Hollywood has anything to say about it.

And finally...

Chicken Little

No one else need see this CG animation bar Deimos Anomaly, but then he doesn't come here anymore. Disney fighting back against Pixar's defection? Perhaps, but I think Pixar is more deserving of my money this time.

Lancer · Post by **Lancer** » 2004-05-27 04:24pm

with respect to Around the World in 80 Days, it's got Rob Schnider in it. I believe that pretty much kills all expectations right off the bat.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2004-05-27 04:25pm

The Village

M. Night Shyamalan's fourth major film after the decidedly mixed results that came with Signs. This time, the story revolves around Joaquin Phoenix from the previous film as he inhabits a village in Philadelphia again it seems that has a pact with creatures in the surrounding forest.

Only one day they find marks on their house doors. A warning? Well, the trailer doesn't show much, but I can assume that it will be creepily like Sleepy Hollow meets Aliens, oh, and the trademark surprise ending apparently doesn't come with this film, though that could be misinformation.

Actually, there supposedly IS a huge twist at the end of this movie. If the one that's being reported is true, it's going to be incredibly stupid.

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2004-05-27 04:30pm

Joe wrote:
The Village

M. Night Shyamalan's fourth major film after the decidedly mixed results that came with Signs. This time, the story revolves around Joaquin Phoenix from the previous film as he inhabits a village in Philadelphia again it seems that has a pact with creatures in the surrounding forest.

Only one day they find marks on their house doors. A warning? Well, the trailer doesn't show much, but I can assume that it will be creepily like Sleepy Hollow meets Aliens, oh, and the trademark surprise ending apparently doesn't come with this film, though that could be misinformation.
Actually, there supposedly IS a huge twist at the end of this movie. If the one that's being reported is true, it's going to be incredibly stupid.

I heard to the contrary since I believe this is based off a book, though don't quote me on that.

I hope if it does have a twist, it's surprising and not in the "mein gott, but that was lame" way.

Matt Huang: So long as one of the main cast kills him off, I'll be happy.

Knife · Post by **Knife** » 2004-05-27 04:33pm

What, no trailer on Sky Captain?

I'm not really looking forward to much this year except the Pixar one (Invincibles?) and Spidy. Then again, I've missed quite a few lately that I wanted to see; Punisher, Hellboy, Denzel's new one, Troy, Shrek (though I'm worried that they'll fuck up the first one). Damn, I'm behind.

Lancer · Post by **Lancer** » 2004-05-27 04:39pm

Knife wrote:What, no trailer on Sky Captain?

I'm not really looking forward to much this year except the Pixar one (Invincibles?) and Spidy. Then again, I've missed quite a few lately that I wanted to see; Punisher, Hellboy, Denzel's new one, Troy, Shrek (though I'm worried that they'll fuck up the first one). Damn, I'm behind.

your movie watchlist similar to mine, but a bit smaller.
Punisher
Hellboy
Man on Fire (Denzel's)
Shrek 2
Van Helsing
Incredibles
Spiderman 2
Aliens vs Predator

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2004-05-27 04:39pm

Man On Fire is out in the US, so I didn't put it up as it's not come to the UK at least yet. Spider-man 2 looks good, I expect Alfred Molina to play a great Doc. Ock. Shrek 2 is unmissable, unless you have a condition that prevents appreciation of good comedy. Punisher has been out in the States, but delayed for the UK. Hellboy I quite simply couldn't give a shit about, again, delayed for the UK because Hollywood fucks us in the ass for some films. Thankfully, not all the good ones go that way. Sky Captain looks great. C'mon, B-movie style effects, a great cast and filmed entirely in bluescreen. It's looking fun.

I'd mention AvP and Resident Evil: Apocalypse etc., however, they're too far off to really worry about yet and most have only teasers out anyway.

Troy I'm seeing this weekend. I'm behind, I know, but I've had so much fucking work that I've had no social life... more so.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2004-05-27 04:41pm

What Troy should have been:

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2004-05-27 04:41pm

ROFL!

That's gold.

Zoink · Post by **Zoink** » 2004-05-27 04:43pm

I can't wait for Aliens vs Predator.... just hope it doesn't suck (*fingers crossed*)

I saw Troy two days ago finally. I thought it was pretty good. Definately going to get the DVD.

Lancer · Post by **Lancer** » 2004-05-27 04:44pm

ahh, the joys of Penny-Arcade.

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2004-05-27 04:51pm

Zoink wrote:I can't wait for Aliens vs Predator.... just hope it doesn't suck (*fingers crossed*)

I've got news for you; it's going to suck. Big.

It's not only a lame setup trying to cash in on two well known and respected franchises (at least Alien is). It's got Paul Anderson directing. He only went and fucked up the Resident Evil flick, so I'm not happy.

Tzeentch · Post by **Tzeentch** » 2004-05-27 05:29pm

I'm looking forward to Terry Gilliam's new film, Brothers Grimm, about the fairy-tale brothers as 16th century conmen.

SyntaxVorlon · Post by **SyntaxVorlon** » 2004-05-27 05:52pm

For those considering seeing Van Helsing:
I saw it opening day, and I warn you it is utter crap, funny in its crapicity, but don't go expecting something scary, it's an action pakked(no typo) creature feature. Though it has a few good qualities. Most of the bits about Frankenstein are ripped from the original bad Frankenstein movie but improve upon it.
The CG is amazing, though sometimes I wish they had done more with it, like when they were trying to do some of the action LA.
The film gets 1.5 stars out of 5 in my book.

Tzeentch · Post by **Tzeentch** » 2004-05-27 06:09pm

SyntaxVorlon wrote:For those considering seeing Van Helsing:
I saw it opening day, and I warn you it is utter crap, funny in its crapicity, but don't go expecting something scary, it's an action pakked(no typo) creature feature. Though it has a few good qualities. Most of the bits about Frankenstein are ripped from the original bad Frankenstein movie but improve upon it.
The CG is amazing, though sometimes I wish they had done more with it, like when they were trying to do some of the action LA.
The film gets 1.5 stars out of 5 in my book.

Heh. Two friends of mine who read the original dracula and considered Van Helsing a personal hero glared at me whenever I warned them that it was going to suck. They walked out of the theatre cowed and broken men.

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2004-05-27 06:12pm

I didn't think it was too bad, it was far too long though. At over two hours, it was pushing it. Ninety minutes is good enough, though even then it was no Mummy beater. The beginning with the Q like area in the Vatican was cool.

Post by **Zaia** » 2004-05-27 06:12pm

Helllllllllllo?! Harry Potter PoA comes out next weeeek!!!

The Village also looks QUITE kickass. M. Night Shyamalan is a sexy movie-making beast, and I can't wait to get sucked into this film.

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2004-05-27 06:17pm

Zaia wrote:Helllllllllllo?! Harry Potter PoA comes out next weeeek!!!

The Village also looks QUITE kickass. M. Night Shyamalan is a sexy movie-making beast, and I can't wait to get sucked into this film.

Zaia-aia, I'm no Potter fan, though I've seen the other films. I may see this if you think it's good.

And I, too, look forward to The Village and hope it's good.

Post by **Zaia** » 2004-05-27 06:23pm

Admiral Valdemar wrote:Zaia-aia, I'm no Potter fan, though I've seen the other films. I may see this if you think it's good.

Heheh...well, this is where the story actually starts to get really interesting--for me, the first two books/stories just set up the world, the characters, the relationships, etc. The third book is where it gets good. [Although, for the record, GoF (#4) is my favourite so far.]

Cutie AV wrote:And I, too, look forward to The Village and hope it's good.

Wanna go see it with me?

Knife · Post by **Knife** » 2004-05-27 06:31pm

Zaia wrote:Helllllllllllo?! Harry Potter PoA comes out next weeeek!!!

The Village also looks QUITE kickass. M. Night Shyamalan is a sexy movie-making beast, and I can't wait to get sucked into this film.

My wife and kids are stroked to see it. I made the mistake of telling my wife that the PoA is the best book out of the series and now she thinks I'm excited to see it when I really could care less.

I'll go because they all want to see it and seeing them happy makes me happy but other than that......

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2004-05-27 06:35pm

Zaia wrote: Heheh...well, this is where the story actually starts to get really interesting--for me, the first two books/stories just set up the world, the characters, the relationships, etc. The third book is where it gets good. [Although, for the record, GoF (#4) is my favourite so far.]

I may just get the books one day...

Wanna go see it with me?

Does this board have an unusual amount of masturbation threads weekly?

Hell yes!

Lancer · Post by **Lancer** » 2004-05-27 07:08pm

SyntaxVorlon wrote:For those considering seeing Van Helsing:
I saw it opening day, and I warn you it is utter crap, funny in its crapicity, but don't go expecting something scary, it's an action pakked(no typo) creature feature. Though it has a few good qualities. Most of the bits about Frankenstein are ripped from the original bad Frankenstein movie but improve upon it.
The CG is amazing, though sometimes I wish they had done more with it, like when they were trying to do some of the action LA.
The film gets 1.5 stars out of 5 in my book.

I expect Van Helsing to be similar to the Mummy movies, lotsa humor, nothing in common w/ the original except for the title and the nature of the baddie.

Marksist · Post by **Marksist** » 2004-05-27 07:58pm

Well I'm looking forward to a lot of summer movies, but especially "The Village." I just love every one of M. Night Shymalan's movies, they are just wonderful character-driven stories. I personally believe that Shymalan is the "next Spielberg," his movies are very similar to the way Spielberg made movies in the 70's and 80's (Close Encounters, E.T., Jaws, even the Indiana Jones movies). Shymalan's movies all take fantastical situations (ghosts, superheroes, alien invasions, and monsters) and makes them believable through believable characters that the viewer can sympathize with. Also the similarity between Shymalan and Spielberg as both director's movies are usually great movies and do well at the box office.

I just have a personal soft-spot for how Shymalan makes movies, I've loved every one of his movies. I will definetely be there to see "The Village" on opening weekend, the trailer looks great, and I hope Shymalan continues to make these types of movies.

Post by **Dalton** » 2004-05-27 08:53pm

Knife wrote:I'll go because they all want to see it and seeing them happy makes me happy but other than that......

You are an honorable man

Post by **Zaia** » 2004-05-27 09:01pm

Dalton wrote:
Knife wrote:I'll go because they all want to see it and seeing them happy makes me happy but other than that......
You are an honorable man

Bah. I'll bet he enjoys it.

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