Death of a Mascot
Posted: 2002-11-07 05:17pm
It is with the saddest heart that I must pass on the following news.
"Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community...the Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes to the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies and
Captain Crunch.
The gravesite was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy
and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he
was kneaded.
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with
turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his
dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times,
he still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play Dough; two children, John Dough and Jane Dough; plus they have one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
"Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community...the Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes to the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies and
Captain Crunch.
The gravesite was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy
and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he
was kneaded.
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with
turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his
dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times,
he still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play Dough; two children, John Dough and Jane Dough; plus they have one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.
The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
That's funny. Know any more?