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World Leadership FAQ

Posted: 2003-01-01 10:43pm
by Keevan_Colton
The World Leadership FAQ
v.1.0

Q.How can I go about gaining control of a large and powerful nation?
A. A good place to start would be through intelligent campaigning and a rational and well thought out approach to the problems of the world such as polution, starvation and the like.

Q. What if I am a very stupid redneck with past drug probelms and little care about the state of the world?
A. Well in that case your best bet is to appeal to the corporation and contribution run two party system that exists in some countries...then if that isnt working have your brother rig it.

Q. Now that I've managed to be elected what should I do now?
A. Well, you could institute social reform to try and solve poverty problems and pollution as well as trying to help through social and economic means nations in a lesser position.

Q. But, I'm an idiot redneck as I said...what can I do then?
A. Well...you could always reject all the previous treaties on pollution etc that have been signed and to hell with the state of the planet. After all, what does it matter to you if the ice caps melt...your term is only 4 years.

Q. I have been hearing reports about terrorists trained by past governments in this country seeking to attack it...what should I do?
A. Well you could...oh wait your the redneck idiot...ignore them, what does it matter after all? You're doing a great job of screwing the future up already, then can only help you speed it up.

Q.These warnings I ignored have come true, terrible terrorist attacks against this country...what should I do now?
A. First of all, arrest a lot of people who are different. This should sit well with your redneck nature...then declare a crusade against Terror. Remember to use words like 'Crusade' a lot so you can remind people of all those wonderful medieval trips to the middle east. Next you should pick a country in some way connected, remember it doesnt have to be a firm connection, then use all those bombs you have to flatten large parts of it. Whatever you do, remember to bomb everything you think might be even possibly be a target. Go for things like weddings in particular as these will give you the most kills per bomb...its also important while doing this to ignore other countries that might complain and never ever mention any innocents you have killed or ever apologise for it.

Q. Wow, that sounds like great advice...what can I do next to cement my position as world leader?
A. As a grand finale to your rise as world leader you need to systematically kill every living thing on the planet...its the only way to gaurentee your own continued power...have fun...



So....any comments/suggestions for me to add into version 1.01?

Posted: 2003-01-01 10:46pm
by Temjin
George W. Bush's second bible...

Posted: 2003-01-01 10:52pm
by Captain Cyran
LOL, that is pretty damn funny! At first you think that this might be serious, then it mentions rednecks, then it mentions terrorists and you know EXACTLY who they are talking about. That was funny, and here is an idea.

Some of my advisors disagree with my actions in these countries I plan to attack, what should I do?

Posted: 2003-01-01 10:52pm
by Straha
As a conservative I am outraged(alright not very, some of it was funny) expect a full rebuttal coming shortly. :P

P.S. I am a Conservative just so you know, and really think that Bush is doing a good job as prez

Posted: 2003-01-01 10:56pm
by Captain Cyran
Straha wrote:As a conservative I am outraged(alright not very, some of it was funny) expect a full rebuttal coming shortly. :P

P.S. I am a Conservative just so you know, and really think that Bush is doing a good job as prez
I will admit it, even though I don't like Bush much. He isn't doing to bad of a job as President, I personally don't think he'll make a second term, but let's look at it this way. He's doing better than Andrew Johnson.

Posted: 2003-01-01 11:00pm
by ArmorPierce
What to do about those pesky enviormentalists that are commplainging that I am destroying the enviorment?

Re: World Leadership FAQ

Posted: 2003-01-01 11:16pm
by Falcon
Keevan_Colton wrote:The World Leadership FAQ
v.1.0

Q.How can I go about gaining control of a large and powerful nation?
A. A good place to start would be through intelligent campaigning and a rational and well thought out approach to the problems of the world such as polution, starvation and the like.
You mean a negative campign of images and icons ment to appeal to the uneducated masses?
Q. What if I am a very stupid redneck with past drug probelms and little care about the state of the world?
A. Well in that case your best bet is to appeal to the corporation and contribution run two party system that exists in some countries...then if that isnt working have your brother rig it.
Or you could simply promise extended unemployment benifits, prescription drug benifits, and talk about making the rich pay 'their fair share'
(oh, voting the dead is a brilliant stroke too)

Q. Now that I've managed to be elected what should I do now?
A. Well, you could institute social reform to try and solve poverty problems and pollution as well as trying to help through social and economic means nations in a lesser position.
looking good, keep railing against the rich, the corporations, the [insert 'evil' rich group or person here], maybe offer something new and spiffy to the seniors like 'lock boxes' or 'trust funds' Keeping spending every dime you get though.
Q. But, I'm an idiot redneck as I said...what can I do then?
A. Well...you could always reject all the previous treaties on pollution etc that have been signed and to hell with the state of the planet. After all, what does it matter to you if the ice caps melt...your term is only 4 years.
You seem to be deviating from your plan, I believe you want something along the line of 'punitive regulations against industry while whipping up a frenzy of speculative hysteria about the environment' This will work much better because people scared of some distant threat always go along with costly and flimsy cures to said problem.
Q. I have been hearing reports about terrorists trained by past governments in this country seeking to attack it...what should I do?
A. Well you could...oh wait your the redneck idiot...ignore them, what does it matter after all? You're doing a great job of screwing the future up already, then can only help you speed it up.
Silly boy, you started so good, the proper answer is 'seek to expand your governments powers to allow you to do anything you want, creating a virtual police state, then no terrorist can get through, if it doesn't work, blame failures on incompetance in said police organizations'
Q.These warnings I ignored have come true, terrible terrorist attacks against this country...what should I do now?
A. First of all, arrest a lot of people who are different. This should sit well with your redneck nature...then declare a crusade against Terror. Remember to use words like 'Crusade' a lot so you can remind people of all those wonderful medieval trips to the middle east. Next you should pick a country in some way connected, remember it doesnt have to be a firm connection, then use all those bombs you have to flatten large parts of it. Whatever you do, remember to bomb everything you think might be even possibly be a target. Go for things like weddings in particular as these will give you the most kills per bomb...its also important while doing this to ignore other countries that might complain and never ever mention any innocents you have killed or ever apologise for it.
yes, and whatever you do, never ever try to enforce your nations treaties, that is a big no no. When addressing terrorists or enemies in general speak in soft measured tones like you would to an angry bear, let it know you mean no harm, and want to reconcile your differences. At this your foes will see the errors of their ways and immediately throw down their arms. Usher in world peace.
Q. Wow, that sounds like great advice...what can I do next to cement my position as world leader?
A. As a grand finale to your rise as world leader you need to systematically kill every living thing on the planet...its the only way to gaurentee your own continued power...have fun...

have minions stockpile large quantities of food, water, and fuel before said 'final solution' since 'work' isn't in your day planner...