Good fanfic ruined by stupid-ness!

UF: Stories written by users, both fanfics and original.

Moderator: LadyTevar

Post Reply
User avatar
CaptainChewbacca
Browncoat Wookiee
Posts: 15746
Joined: 2003-05-06 02:36am
Location: Deep beneath Boatmurdered.

Good fanfic ruined by stupid-ness!

Post by CaptainChewbacca »

So I was reading a fic on Spacebattles about a WWIII that starts in 12 years with a fascist Russia and a continental-EU ganging up on America and her allies.

Now, towards the bottom, the author says that at day 3 of this war, public support for the war is at 60% and congress is clamoring for the President's head. This is AFTER someone wiped out Honolulu, a few US Carriers, and hit strategic targets on the west coast. On page 2, some schmuck is trying to convince me that 3 days after the worst military attack since Pearl Harbor Americans wouldn't be universally calling out for blood. Also, he doesn't think its odd that the Author had the 9th circuit court rule that it was unconstitutional for the US to wage war from west-coast bases.

:banghead:

I guess I'd just like some moral support.
Stuart: The only problem is, I'm losing track of which universe I'm in.
You kinda look like Jesus. With a lightsaber.- Peregrin Toker
ImageImage
User avatar
Mr Bean
Lord of Irony
Posts: 22455
Joined: 2002-07-04 08:36am

Post by Mr Bean »

....Yeah Mornic.

One thing Americans have demostrated in the past and countine to demostrate, kill enough Americans in a grand enough fasion and you will unite everyone behind one banner, if not forever at least for a full year.

"A cult is a religion with no political power." -Tom Wolfe
Pardon me for sounding like a dick, but I'm playing the tiniest violin in the world right now-Dalton
User avatar
Ford Prefect
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 8254
Joined: 2005-05-16 04:08am
Location: The real number domain

Post by Ford Prefect »

Poor Chewie. That's pretty damn stupid.
What is Project Zohar?

Here's to a certain mostly harmless nutcase.
User avatar
CaptainChewbacca
Browncoat Wookiee
Posts: 15746
Joined: 2003-05-06 02:36am
Location: Deep beneath Boatmurdered.

Post by CaptainChewbacca »

Ford Prefect wrote:Poor Chewie. That's pretty damn stupid.
God bless you, Ford. That's the best post I've seen in a YEAR! You're so hip, I bet you can't see past your own pelvis ;)
Stuart: The only problem is, I'm losing track of which universe I'm in.
You kinda look like Jesus. With a lightsaber.- Peregrin Toker
ImageImage
User avatar
Ford Prefect
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 8254
Joined: 2005-05-16 04:08am
Location: The real number domain

Post by Ford Prefect »

Aww, shucks.
What is Project Zohar?

Here's to a certain mostly harmless nutcase.
User avatar
Battlehymn Republic
Jedi Council Member
Posts: 1824
Joined: 2004-10-27 01:34pm

Post by Battlehymn Republic »

In fanfiction, a good grasp of geopolitics can be as rare as good grammar and mechanics m'friend.
User avatar
Chmee
Sith Marauder
Posts: 4449
Joined: 2004-12-23 03:29pm
Location: Seattle - we already buried Hendrix ... Kurt who?

Post by Chmee »

I believe Neal Stephenson put it best in Cryptonomicon, as Admiral Yamamoto ruminates on his nation's fortunes while riding aboard a Betty on the way to a fateful meeting with some P-38's:
Tojo and his claque of Imperial Army boneheads said to him, in effect: Why don't you go out and secure the Pacific Ocean for us, because we'll need a convenient shipping lane, say, oh, about ten thousand miles wide, in order to carry out our little plan to conquer South America, Alaska, and all of North America west of the Rockies. In the meantime we'll finish mopping up China. Please attend to this ASAP.

By then they were running the country. They had assassinated anyone in their way, they had the emperor's ear, and it was hard to tell them that their plan was full of shit and that the Americans were just going to get really pissed off and annihilate them. So, Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto, a dutiful servant of the emperor, put a bit of thought into the problem, sketched out a little plan, sent out one or two boats on a small jaunt halfway across the fucking planet, and blew Pearl Harbor off the map. He timed it perfectly, right after the formal declaration of war. It was not half bad. He did his job.

One of his aides later crawled into his office--in the nauseatingly craven posture that minions adopt when they are about to make you really, really unhappy--and told him that there had been a mix-up in the embassy in Washington and that the diplomats there had not gotten around to delivering the declaration of war until well after the American Pacific Fleet had gone to the bottom.

To those Army fuckheads, this is nothing--just a typo, happens all the time. Isoroku Yamamoto has given up on trying to make them understand that the Americans are grudge-holders on a level that is inconceivable to the Nipponese, who learn to swallow their pride before they learn to swallow solid food. Even if he could get Tojo and his mob of shabby, ignorant thugs to comprehend how pissed off the Americans are, they'd laugh it off. What're they going to do about it? Throw a pie in your face, like the Three Stooges? Ha, ha, ha! Pass the sake and bring me another comfort girl!
[img=right]http://www.tallguyz.com/imagelib/chmeesig.jpg[/img]My guess might be excellent or it might be crummy, but
Mrs. Spade didn't raise any children dippy enough to
make guesses in front of a district attorney,
an assistant district attorney, and a stenographer
.

Sam Spade, "The Maltese Falcon"

Operation Freedom Fry
Junghalli
Sith Acolyte
Posts: 5001
Joined: 2004-12-21 10:06pm
Location: Berkeley, California (USA)

Post by Junghalli »

Indeed, we do have a definite urge to kill anybody who shows us up.
I suspect this is one of the reasons I hate Gor so much. They kidnap our citizens with fucking impugnity, they need to learn about the awesome power of modern weapons that we command, preferably hands on!
General Brock
Jedi Council Member
Posts: 1739
Joined: 2005-03-16 03:52pm
Location: Land of Resting Gophers, Canada

Post by General Brock »

Sounds like some hawk wannabe trying to make peaceniks look extra-stupid. A shame if the rest of the fic that good, or if you are just the thorough type, that you have to wade and finish it, no matter how painful.
User avatar
CaptainChewbacca
Browncoat Wookiee
Posts: 15746
Joined: 2003-05-06 02:36am
Location: Deep beneath Boatmurdered.

Post by CaptainChewbacca »

General Brock wrote:Sounds like some hawk wannabe trying to make peaceniks look extra-stupid. A shame if the rest of the fic that good, or if you are just the thorough type, that you have to wade and finish it, no matter how painful.
He made some changes, now America is just scared, but ready to fight.
Stuart: The only problem is, I'm losing track of which universe I'm in.
You kinda look like Jesus. With a lightsaber.- Peregrin Toker
ImageImage
User avatar
Crown
NARF
Posts: 10615
Joined: 2002-07-11 11:45am
Location: In Transit ...

Re: Good fanfic ruined by stupid-ness!

Post by Crown »

CaptainChewbacca wrote:So I was reading a fic on Spacebattles about a WWIII that starts in 12 years with a fascist Russia and a continental-EU ganging up on America and her allies.
Just out of interest, is the EU fascist too? Cause it's pretty hard to run a war with a committee of 25+ and all ...
Image
Η ζωή, η ζωή εδω τελειώνει!
"Science is one cold-hearted bitch with a 14" strap-on" - Masuka 'Dexter'
"Angela is not the woman you think she is Gabriel, she's done terrible things"
"So have I, and I'm going to do them all to you." - Sylar to Arthur 'Heroes'
User avatar
Darth Wong
Sith Lord
Sith Lord
Posts: 70028
Joined: 2002-07-03 12:25am
Location: Toronto, Canada
Contact:

Re: Good fanfic ruined by stupid-ness!

Post by Darth Wong »

CaptainChewbacca wrote:So I was reading a fic on Spacebattles about a WWIII that starts in 12 years with a fascist Russia and a continental-EU ganging up on America and her allies.

Now, towards the bottom, the author says that at day 3 of this war, public support for the war is at 60% and congress is clamoring for the President's head. This is AFTER someone wiped out Honolulu, a few US Carriers, and hit strategic targets on the west coast. On page 2, some schmuck is trying to convince me that 3 days after the worst military attack since Pearl Harbor Americans wouldn't be universally calling out for blood. Also, he doesn't think its odd that the Author had the 9th circuit court rule that it was unconstitutional for the US to wage war from west-coast bases.

:banghead:

I guess I'd just like some moral support.
This fanfic writer sounds like a conservative who buys into exaggerated Rush Limbaugh caricatures about the "liberal media" and "radical peacenik tree-huggers".
Image
"It's not evil for God to do it. Or for someone to do it at God's command."- Jonathan Boyd on baby-killing

"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC

"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness

"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.

http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
User avatar
CaptainChewbacca
Browncoat Wookiee
Posts: 15746
Joined: 2003-05-06 02:36am
Location: Deep beneath Boatmurdered.

Post by CaptainChewbacca »

Actually, he's mostly an idiot.
Stuart: The only problem is, I'm losing track of which universe I'm in.
You kinda look like Jesus. With a lightsaber.- Peregrin Toker
ImageImage
User avatar
Setzer
Requiescat in Pace
Posts: 3138
Joined: 2002-08-30 11:45am

Post by Setzer »

How the hell do they rule operating from US Sovereign territory in defense of the nation is unconstitutional? I'm pretty sure there's no clause saying in time of war, all Americans are to bend over and let themselves get assfucked by foreigners. After all, Wong still lives in Canada.
Image
User avatar
Darth Servo
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 8805
Joined: 2002-10-10 06:12pm
Location: Satellite of Love

Re: Good fanfic ruined by stupid-ness!

Post by Darth Servo »

Idiot fanfic wrote:Also, he doesn't think its odd that the Author had the 9th circuit court rule that it was unconstitutional for the US to wage war from west-coast bases.
But it IS constitutional to wage war from East- or Gulf-coast bases? :roll:
"everytime a person is born the Earth weighs just a little more."--DMJ on StarTrek.com
"You see now you are using your thinking and that is not a good thing!" DMJay on StarTrek.com

"Watching Sarli argue with Vympel, Stas, Schatten and the others is as bizarre as the idea of the 40-year-old Virgin telling Hugh Hefner that Hef knows nothing about pussy, and that he is the expert."--Elfdart
Post Reply