Big Universe: a series of 40k Fussions

[Vehrec]

Disclaimer:The following is not a great work of art, or even a decent work of fan fiction. It should not resemble any of these things. It is a shameless exercise in fanboyism that results in fusions that should not be, and many other things. I have been bad in making this. I have no regrets.
I don't know everything about 40k, and sometimes have trouble keeping things in universe. Please tell me Where and When I deviate beyond the acceptable.
I also own none of the properties here mocked/enshrined. But you already knew that.

A series of Warhammer 40k/whatever the hell I feel like today fusions:
Big Universe.
To clear up a simple point, there are a million worlds in the Imperium of man. At least. Thats a lot of planets, people, spaceships, and what have you. And that means a lot of room to squeeze in a few things around the edges. People who don't belong here, but with a lot of shoehorning fit in anyways. These are the stories of familiar faces who are adrift in a world where there is only war. Mind your step, and don't feed the Khorks.


Ryoko Daemon-caller, Queen of the Pirates, Daughter of none.
The bridge crew looked with heavy hearts at the sensor readings, with one exception. Their captain smirked at the hologram of the system. Necrons to the fore, a Chaos battle group to the right and a Imperial battle group of equal size to the left. All about to collide in the area they were going to be flying through in about 2 minutes. Any SANE Eldar would have held back and waited for them to tear each other to pieces, and maybe save the Mon-Keis at the last minute to use them at the last minute.

Their captain was anything but sane.

“All right! Full speed ahead, bring us into boarding range of that tombship! All hands prepare to abandon ship, we've got a new one waiting for us to take it!” It was business as usual, and only the freshest crewmen were thrown off by the orders. After all, most of them had come aboard because this was what the captain was about. She would be there when they crossed over, wearing nothing more than her black jumpsuit with the gauss dispersing weave and a breath mask. Her only weapon would be a witchblade, and her eternal tactic would be the advance, a single endless series of blows to drive her enemy back before her until she reached her goal. To them, she was a goddess. They had no idea how right they were.
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There are many Eldar pirates, but among them all none is considered so reckless, so bold, so lucky as Ryoko the Daemon caller. She is far and again the oldest of the Eldar pirate captains, with reliable reports of her raiding dating back to a supposed encounter during the First Crusade with Rogal Dorn. While this encounter between Pirate and Primarch cannot be proved, it is also true that shortly after the Horus Heresy over a hundred ships were seized by a female Eldar in the garb of a Banshee exarch. What made these raids truly remarkable was that when battle group Foehammer was sent to destroy her base after 20 years of extended operations, the Exarch summoned a horde of Daemons to cover her fleet's retreat with the spoils of their victories. Over the coming millennium, this woman would raid fleets throughout the imperium, and as her fame grew, so did her sense of flamboyance.

By the time of the 36th millennium she had completely shed all her armor in favor of a skintight bodysuit that offered little in the way of protection, and bared her face and cyan hair to her victims for the first time. Her taste in targets also changed during this period, targeting the richest ships of the time; the Eclisiarchy's vessels loaded down with the tithes of a thousand worlds. During one such raid, it became clear that treasure gained in raiding was not the only motivation of this most confusing pirate. During a raid on a convoy in the Mercator system, a Chaos battleship of Slaanesh exited the warp on the far side of the system. Ryoko immediately broke off her fleet's attack and concentrated her firepower on destroying the new target. When Imperial forces next entered the system they found that the Chaos ship's hulk had been converted into a bizarre twisted warning to all other servants of Chaos that death awaited them. Such totems of doom have been found in over a hundred systems, the ships dead with crews chained to the hulls and their captains vivisected on the bridge. The ships used in such creations range from escorts to Battleships, and are often set up to explode in case any salvage attempts are made on them by the greedy.

This was around the time that the first major Inquisition efforts to determine the origins of the Pirate Queen were made. Several revelations about her nature, including her hedonistic and bloodthirsty tendencies made some wonder if she wasn't a Dark Eldar, but a band of Harlequins revealed a more troubling truth. Shortly after the death of the Eldar home worlds, a party walking a disused portion of the webway found a nude female whom they brought back to a craftworld. An attractive woman by any standard, she was described as cunning, intelligent, blessed with superior strength and agility and a mysterious ability to call creatures from the warp, although a distinct lack of ability to control them. She also was lacking in all knowledge save that of her name. It is true that at first she wore the aspect of a Banshee but over time she diverged until she was an aspect all her own. And as she aged, it became obvious that something was off about this strange woman. She did not age at all, she healed from mortal wounds and she was a blank spot in the visions of the Farseers, and all who attempted to read her own future were driven mad by the visions. She had been chosen nine times to lead attacks against the great enemy of the Eldar, and each time it was as though an Avatar led them into battle.

And it was on the last such occasion that she dueled a Sorcerer of Tzeentch to the death and retrieve the warp artifact that he had been using to create a sector wide warp storm. According to the Eldar who witnessed this event, she pulled the gem from his eye socket, considered it for a scarce moment and then sliced open her wrist and shoved it into the wound. Her left arm was in an instant consumed in a flare of light, and when it had died down, the gem was fused with her flesh. Reports about what happened after that are conflicting, but seem to indicate that she was plagued by dreams of a ship in the galactic core and after debating this for months decided to leave without an escort of any kind to search for it. Details of the gem's nature have not been forthcoming, and since this occurred seven centuries ago, it seems now unlikely that the inquisition will discover what exactly it was.

Addendum: Reports have reached the Ordos Xenos that the pirate queen Ryoko Daemon caller is searching the center of the galaxy for an artifact known as the Dragon from the Warp. Known Eldar naming conventions point to this being a starship of immense power. Discression is advised.

The Dark: Ryoko is a warp godling, slow in her growth. She was 'born' the same day as the dread enemy of the Eldar, in the destruction of an empire. As the Eldar gods died, a few were able to release some of their energy to one of the last to fall. This goddess, patron of intellect and cunning shaped the nascent god, and gave it much of her own power, sealing away the remainder in three jewels that were then gifted to the Great Harlequin for safekeeping. When Slaanesh came for her, he found a dessicated almost corpse that laughed as he devoured what remained of her essence. Cegorach had meanwhile made a disturbing discovery. The newborn goddess of vengeance that he clutched to his chest as he fled was almost stillborn, and dying because she had been ripped from her mother's arms too soon. With little time to spare, he used what power remained to him to incarnate her into a physical body that could channel some small portion of her divine might. It was this abandoned child-woman who was found by the patrolling band of Eldar.

The three Jewels of power were scattered and fell into the hands of many, as they radiated great energies. One was delivered into the hands of the Lord of Change by Horus himself: this one later found it's way to the Sorcerer killed by Ryoko. A second awakened an ancient factory deep within the galactic core, and there built a ship, Ryo-oh-ki; The Dragon from the Warp. This ship was also divine, inspired by the designs from Ryoko's mother. Sadly the last gem was found by the servants of Slaanesh, and they have delivered it to their master. Although even she/he cannot use its full power, as long as he/she holds it the Pirate Queen cannot become the creature she was meant to be. And even if she were to obtain it, her victory over the creature who's death is her reason for existence is uncertain.
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When the day was done, perhaps one in ten of them was left standing. And yet they were filled with wonder at their victory. Their queen moved among the survivors assuring that they would life to fight again. The Tombship was little but a burning hulk, their own vessel long obliterated. But the Mon-kei ship would serve them until they found another. One did not mourn a tool, but cast it aside and found another she told them. And crude as it was, the Lunar Cruiser would be an effective tool. Even the degenerates aboard this crude contrivance were bowing down before their mistress' glory. Already, the ratlings and conscripts had torn themselves apart rioting and killing their Commissars. Before long, there would be a cult forming if they held true to their patterns. And they too would follow in her wake. For what else could you do when a Goddess called?

Coming next: The Pestilent Hive world of Morpork and it's gilded twin Ankh.