Star Trek: Untamed Space

[Darth Fanboy]

*I've written several SW short stories and at a time was an aspiring novelist. This is my first attempt at anything Star Trek and I decided that it might be time to look at the underworld of the Alpha Quadrant. The Tatooines, Nar Shaddas and other wretched hives of scum and villany if you will.*

The Story focuses on a small crew of bounty hunters/pirates working in areas of Federation space not regularly patrolled with proximity to other territories such as Ferengi space. Their ship is the Forsaken, a custom private type of vessel which can be considered a ST version of the millenium falcon due to the illegal weaponry and speed of the vessel compared to other AQ ships.

This test scene I've written focuses on two of the crew members and the bounty they are about to collect. One is Eizen, a cybernetically/genetically enhanced human who suffers severe epsiodes of violence if not medicated. There is also Asran, a Vulcan who acts more Romulan due to past experiences with Starfleet and his own culture, although he still loosely clings to Vulcan beliefs.

[Darth Fanboy]

"You vile piece of filth, when Starfleet hears about this they'll....."

Eizen backhanded the old man with a titanium fist, it was getting even harder to control his temper and if he didn't get taken care of soon he was going to have to shut down half his nervous system again. Something he didn't want to do this close to hostile territory.

"Bad News old man, the Federation isn't out here, they can't save you, now my friends and I are going to take you to an old friends of yours. You remember Dhulthan Kimus don't you?"

The Captain flinched nervously, recognition oozed into his mind like a vile poison

"But he was locked up years ago! The courts sentenced him to 50 years with no chance for early release!"

Eizen grinned slightly, allowing himself to relish in one of his few good memories, these Starfleet types were so confident in their own strength they didn't realize how infallible they were.

"Your Federation prisons just aren't has secure as they used to be, I should know. At any rate once you get there then I can take a short vacation, your bounty has been quite high. Y'know Kimus never forgot the name of the guy who interrupted his daughter's christening to serve a warrant."

"It was the best opportunity, he is wanted for violating many Federation Laws including providing advanced technology to low tech societies."

"Low tech species supposedly within Federation boundaries, god forbid they actually be a part of the government that cares soooo much for them."

"THe Prime DIrective clearly states..."

"Damn you and your Prime Directive, just between you and me i'd have done this job for free."

Eizen began succumbing to his blood pressure and instinctively he reached for his disruptor. Before he could do anything, Asran had already entered the room, the Vulcan was intent on keeping Eizen from botching the mission.

"Eizen, you know that if you kill him now we don't get paid. If we don't get paid you won't be treated and if you aren't treated we'll have to shut you down again. You remember what that feels like I bet. So please, be logical, don't make me have to put you down."

"Stay out of this Vulcan, you know exactly how these starfleet types go on preaching their high ideals when the only people benefitting are those bastards on Earth."

"Yes, but remember, Kimus has something special in mind, trust me, we do not want to waste this particular bounty on your disruptor. Besides you know expensive it is to find power packs for that thing."

Eizen left the room, Asran noted that the treatments were losing their potency and catalogued that as something that would have to be dealt with as soon as the latinum was collected. At almost the perfect moment Nilyst signaled from the cockpit that they would be docking with Kimus ship any second and that preparations to transport the merchandise were underway.

"Ahhh Logic, at least you haven't forsaken me, now if you'll excuse me Captain, Logic dictates that in order to take care of my current situation I need a healthy supply of currency. Turning you over to Kimus will do nicely."

The chained captain tried to stand but was restrained by the chains placed in the rear of the cargo bay.

"You've reminded me of that quite enough now, don't you think I know what my fate is? YOu turn me over to criminal scum like Kimus and collect a bounty. What I don't understand is what purpose does this serve? Revenge is such a petty concept."

"Well why don't you tell that to the Maquis and other Federation Citizens slaughtered by the Dominion thanks to Federation peacekeeping, i;m sure Eizen would love to lecture you on that issue. But I am a Vulcan I don't lie, the reason your price is so large is because Kimus doesn't hold your academy brainwashed mentality. He is a wealthy man despite his internment and when a wealthy person holds a grudge he has one thing most people don't have at their disposal. The Money to make the revenge happen, even if it doesn't completely satisfy him."

Before the captain could utter one last taunt Asran leaned forward and placed his hand on the Captain's shoulder.

"Nighty Night sir."

In ten minutes the crew of the Forsaken would be 2000 bars of latinum richer, and they could afford to acquire some more medical supplies for Eizen. It seemed, at the time, that all of the crew's short term problems were taken care of

[Einhander Sn0m4n]

Only problem: It's too damn short! Otherwise it's very nice!

[Darth Fanboy]

Yeah its just a test scene, I'm going to write the first portion fairly soon as soon as I get a little more feedback and maybe come up with a design for the Forsaken.

[Darth Fanboy]

This is a shameless thread bump and a request for some more feedback regarding the topic as to what I could do to improve this story other than add more content.

[Einhander Sn0m4n]

Bump BumpBumpityBUMP!!!
Hey it's just fine with me!

[FaxModem1]

Its good, for a moment there, I thought you had chained Picard, and that would be kind of a sad image to see a defenseless person in chains.

So, this story is going to have a lot of anti-federation sentiment I take it?

p.s.What time period does this take place in?(TNG-series, DS9 series, TNG movies)

[Soontir C'boath]

Hmmmm Brain washed officers getting their needed dues....A rich person set out on getting them...or just the one mentioned.....I like it.

Cyaround,
jason

[Darth Fanboy]

A lot of trekkies preach the "fact" that the Federation is this idealistic society. The faults we see in the FEderation though are definitely evident though, and i'm somewhat inspired by the Maquis and the events that took place in ST: Insurrection.

I've got a lot more going fo rme with this story and i'll have a cleaned up first chapter soon. I think my favorite character is going to be the emotionally disturbed Vulcan.

In the meantime check out the first part of "City of Dying Dreams" which will be up within the next 10 minutes or so here as soon as I grammar check and post

[Darth Fanboy]

*part 2 of ST: Untamed space is a direct continuation of the first scene depicted earlier in this threat.*

*The crew of the Forsaken is rendezvousing with the Bulk Freighter of Dhulthan Kimus to collect payment for the bounty placed on a Federation Captain.*

Kimus’ ship, the Elegant Outlaw, was a customized bulk freighter with all sorts of smuggling compartments and sensor shields that could get him through even some of the more advanced scans of Federation starships. His organization’s business was doing much better following the near collapse of his Orion Syndicate rivals. The Forsaken pulled along the freighter, Asran and the captured Federation Captain Johannsen beamed over shortly afterwards. Kimus himself was there to greet them in his transporter room, striding forward confidently as possible with his scepter in hand. Kimus claimed he kept it with him for luck, but Asran knew it had other purposes other than aesthetic ones.

“Asran my old friend! You have finally done what no other mercenary has ever been able to do!”

“Ah Dhulthan, it is good to see you, as much as I’d like to sit and chat I’m afraid that I need to conduct our business rather quickly.”

“But of course Asran, but of course. Tell me, is Eizen acting up again?”

“I’m afraid so, it seems that Captain Johannsen here riled him up quite a bit while discussing Federation politics.”

Kimus’ spat in the direction of Johannsen, who was just coming to after the effect of the Vulcan nerve pinch. He paced over to his captive and looked right into his eyes. He turned back towards Asran and then suddenly turned back towards the captive again, this time bringing a steel-toed boot to the Captain’s face. “Yes we’ll have lots of fun together won’t we you infernal Starfleet lapdog. Let Eizen know that one was for him, I take it you’ll be needing medical supplies rather shortly then?”

“That’s right, I am going to make one last request though old friend. Risa was a long way off and we had to evade three Federation ships just to get clear. Our fuel is rather low and I’m going to have to raise the price on this man to 2500 bars.”

“Asran, you know if there’s only one thing I hate more than socialist zealots and that’s people who try to cheat me out of my money. The last person who tried to do that was a Ferengi whose ears are now mounted in my trophy room.”

“Then don’t think of it as extra expense, think of it as a retainer for our services in the future then.”

“Asran if there’s one thing I’ve always tried to instill in you its that you should never, ever try and extort your elders.”

Asran sighed and smiled to himself, Kimus always enjoyed these games; ever since Asran had met him as a child he had used contradiction as way of teaching his protégés so that they would commit things to their memory.

“You also taught me to squeeze every bit of fortune I could out of a business deal, and we do need the extra funds. Eizen’s condition has taken a turn for the worse, Nilyst wants a bigger cut after the beating the shields took last time we saw a Federation ship, and personally, I don’t think we’re being paid enough.”

Kimus grinned, obviously pleased with Asran’s deduction. “You do well, you do well. In fact some of those things I needed to be reminded of myself. As it stands though I cannot afford the extra 500 bars seeing as though I’m still rebuilding my organization as it is, we’ll be expanding into some of Orion’s old territories soon and I’ll need some working capital to get those businesses off the ground.”

“Somehow I expected this Kimus. Captain Johannsen good news, we’ll be taking you back to Federation space.”

The weary man’s face lit up, a faint glimmer of hope shone brightly in his eyes. Until Kimus walked forward and flicked a switch on his cane, a jolt of electricity flowed from the cane into the abdomen of the prisoner and Kimus roared with laughter.

“Asran you never cease to amaze me, that look of hope in his eyes! Let’s make a deal, you say you need fuel? It just so happens I refueled the Elegant Outlaw two days ago. You may siphon off enough to fill half of your reserves and you may bring Eizen aboard to my personal Infirmary. I believe its neurothol and Tryptocedrine he requires?”

Asran stopped and contemplated Kimus’ offer. Eizen’s treatments alone would have been 300 bars and the fuel would have taken a large part of Nilyst’s cut. Something bothered him about the deal. “You know Kimus, logic would dictate that I accept this deal. But I want to know what you have in mind. There’s no reason for you to keep neurothol and tryptocedrine unless you knew Eizen was coming here and even then why would you pay that high of a price. It would have been cheaper to give us the 500 bars rather than the medicine and the fuel.”

Kimus motioned for a pair of guards to come in. A pair of tough looking Klingons pulled the Federation Captain down the corridor towards his final fate. “What you said earlier about paying a retainer, this is it. I have a business partner, whose name shall remain silent, that has been following your recent adventures closely. He asked if I would serve as an intermediary between him and the crew of the Forsaken, I agreed.”

Asran’s gaze on Kimus turned to stone, as if he had reverted to traditional Vulcan ways. “Will we ever get to meet this partner of yours?”

“I’m afraid not old friend, but you will be interested to know that he already has a job for you. One that will pay much more than any bounty I could possibly arrange for you.”

Asran’s eyes grew wider, “How much are we talking.”

Back in the lounge aboard the Forsaken Asran returned with the latinum as well as a small kit containing the medical supplies. Nilyst stormed towards him, her boots like thunder on the deck of the ship, she examined the latinum first and then took a swing at Asran, which he dodged at the last second.

“Tholian Filthworm! You had better have a damn good reason why there is only two thousand bars of latinum on here, you said you could get twenty five hundred!”

“Calm Nilyst, Kimus was kind enough to supply us with an NT Kit for Eizen, and if you’ll undo the fuel sockets he’ll fill up 50% of our supply. There was also a more interesting offer, something I’d like to discuss further once we have Eizen settled, how is he?”

“He’s locked himself in his quarters and he’s been constantly thirsty, I’m worried, he’s been replicating all sorts of drinks to try and quench the thirst but all he’s doing is wasting what stock we have!”

“We’ll get some more when we fill the rest of the tank at the nearest station. Deep Space Nine isn’t too far away, we can hit Quarks and use one of the holosuites. That jerk owes me from the last time I cleared out the Dabo tables anyway and now that the Dominion is gone I can finally collect. But let’s not keep our friend waiting right?”

Nilyst and Asran walked down towards the small crew quarters that Eizen kept for himself. A various array of glasses and bottles lined the shelf and floor and were empty. Asran tossed the NT Kit at Eizen and whispered, “We’ll give you some privacy. But when you’re done, we need to talk in the lounge so hurry up, and please put those glasses in the redemption receptacle. We can’t afford to restock the ship with raw materials quite yet.”

Eizen cursed to himself and cleared the small table he kept by his bunk. Opening the kit he grabbed the injection cylinder and attached a small nozzle from the kit directly into a port in his neck. The injection cylinder attached easily, the neurothol went in first, and Eizen’s mind calmed rather quickly. He was still on edge though and with his regained composure he could feel the symptoms of his genetic enhancements wind his organs into knots and he could sense his muscles tighten as hard as titanium. He removed the injection cylinder and crushed it in his hand, once the cylinder had been used once it was impossible to use them over again without paying more than what the thing was worth anyway. The tryptocedrine went into a separate cylinder and Eizen entered that into the neck port as well. Eizen nearly collapsed, that tended to happen when he went an extended period of time between treatments. After about ten minutes he stood up and lumbered out towards the ships washroom, all those drinks were catching up to him.

[Darth Fanboy]

If anywone would like to help me design the Forsaken I would gladly appreciate it. I don't have a lot of experience in the designs and layout of ST style ships.

[Glare]

Looking good so far. Just a few minor nitpicks but otherwise it's great.

Eizen grinned slightly, allowing himself to relish in one of his few good memories, these Starfleet types were so confident in their own strength they didn't realize how infallible they were.

Don't you mean fallible? This gives the impression that they are godlike and can't make mistakes. Also it would be nice to get a little more background details on your protagonists. Why Elizen is like he is (I presume he was some sort of experiment, what with the genetics, and obvious augmentations), although you may be aiming for a more measured pace.

Sorry, can't help with ST ships, not a great trek fan. All in all, a fic I look forward to reading. About time the truth of the feddies came out.

[Darth Fanboy]

Dammit, you're right. I'll fix that in the edit.

[Darth Fanboy]

The characters backgrounds will be revealed shorrtly but if you would like a spoiler I'll add a character bio that I wrote up.

Actually named Eisen Antares, formerly a starfleet officer, he underwent a series of cybernetic and genetic enhancements that have made him smarter, faster, and stronger than almost any other humanoid in the quadrant, however, the treatments have made him extremely violent and he requires a steady regiment of tranquilizers and nueral stabilizers in order to keep sane. The treatments were part of a Federation/Section 31 project during the DOminion War to help offset the power of the Jem'Hadar. It was considered a failure when then Lieutenant Antares butchered every dominion soldier he found ruthlessly and effectively, too violently for the Federation's tastes. WIth the project scrapped, Antares no longer had access to the vital substances Neurothol and Tryptocedrine, which keep him able to function normally.

I thought a combination of cybernetic enhancements would be cool, but the addition of genetic enhancements as well I think removes him from his humanity alot, and I want to use as few humans as possible. The third part will hope to see Asran and Eizen's skills put to good use.

[Darth Fanboy]

The crew of the forsaken was seated in the pilots lounge on the old and worn furnishings Nilyst had managed to install over the last few years. Eizen walked into the room steady, but the expression on what was left of his face gave the distinct impression that he wasn’t going to be playing any of that ancient Earth music at full blast anytime soon. Asran silently wondered to himself how humans ever evolved ears with those kinds of tastes. Asran figured he had better say something first before Nilyst pissed Eizen off like that time on Desrik IX when Eizen had nearly tossed her out of the airlock.

“Good to see you’re okay Eizen, I figured the three of us could talk while Kimus’ ship refuels us. In about five minutes we’ll be receiving a data file with our next job, but before we accept this job I just want you to know that we might be getting involved in something over our heads. Kimus is only acting as an intermediary between us and this employer.”

As usual Nilyst was the first to voice her opposition to the plan, she was never big on being committed to a plan or idea without her steadfast approval. Which is probably why she wasn’t living her intended existence as a wife back on Krios.

“Hold on Asran, when I met you and Eizen on DS9 and we agreed to this little partnership the first rule was “never get anyone else involved in something stupid, something too risky, or both.” What in the hell are you thinking? Of course we can’t accept this job.”

“I understand Nilyst, it pains me to say it but logic would dictate that I refuse up front and we go on our way. But Kimus and I go back even longer than the three of us, I owe him that much to just look at the file and then refuse him politely.”

Eizen spoke from out of nowhere, usually after aking his medication he was complacent and just went along with whatever Asran and Nilyst decided.

“How much money are we talking here?”

“It doesn’t matter Eizen, because Asran is just about to go over to the communications console and tell Kimus that we aren’t doing it for all the ale on Romulus.”

Asran smirked, “Lets not be too hasty, that would fetch a pretty good price if we decided to take into deep Federation space. I have a contact on Alperia that could…looks like that will have to wait, it seems the file has arrived.”

Asran downloaded the file into the ships containment computer, a small CPU separate from the actual ship’s systems in case of computer viruses; it also had a decryption program on it in order to unlock secure files. Kimus’ encryptions were usually among the most difficult for the computer to crack, this one however was taking a lot longer than usual. Asran was beginning to wonder if Eizen was going to have to interface with the unit and do it himself. After about twenty minutes the file opened up, it contained a document with what Asran guessed to be a mission profile with objectives and conditions. It could have been confused with a military briefing except for the pirce that flashed at the bottom of the screen. Asran had the contents of the document fed into a replicator, where a hard copy version was printed. Asran then deleted all copies of the document to prevent any sort of timed-release surprises from interfering with the backup computer.

“I suppose you two are going to want to know about the contents right? Before you say anything Nilyst, I want you to read what’s written on this thing.”

Asran handed Nilyst the document, Eizen moved closer to view for himself, using his optic enhancers so he wouldn’t violate the personal space of Nilyst, who was known to throw her knees toward any crotch in the vicinity when threatened.

*begin document*

To the crew of the Forsaken., congratulations on the Johannsen bounty. I suspect that Kimus is ecstatic at finally getting revenge. As for our business, I have been watching you very carefully these last few weeks. The assignment I’m offering is not exactly an easy task and I suspect that even freelancers of even your high caliber will get into more than a bit of trouble.

Recently an interesting piece of equipment was stolen from a Klingon research lab. I had contracted to buy this piece of equipment in order to sell it to the Cardassians or Romulans. Unfortunately, the contact who acquired the merchandise is in hiding after his ship was nearly shot down by a Klingon task force out searching for him. The contact’s name is Sudric, a Lurian. The last time he was heard from was while attempting to cross the border into Federation space near the new colony of Tau Seti XII.

Objectives:
-Find Sudric and return him to the Elegant Outlaw or ensure he is dead
-Retrieve the equipment and bring it back to the Elegant Outlaw
-The merchandise must be retrieved without the Klingons knowing that you and your ship were involved

Price:
10000 bars of latinum, payable upon delivery of the merchandise and Sudric

*end document*

Nilyst was practically in shock; ever since the Orion syndicate crashed and the Romulan Government quit hiring mercenaries no one had been able to pay this kind of money for a job outside of the law.

“Asran we have to take this offer. For 10,000 bars we could finally take a few months off. Maybe even get that cloaking device from the Ferengi!”

“I agree with the bitch Asran, that sum is too high NOT to be genuine. Besides we need to operate in a new area anyway. Even the Feds aren’t stupid enough not to make a connection between our ship and the amount of unlawful activity going on wherever we go.”

Nilyst was about to turn around and slap Eizen except she wasn’t in the mood to spend the next few days with a bone stabilizer on her arm like last time. Asran turned towards the viewport that looked into space and sighed.

“It is a lot of money…okay, first we’ll head for Deep Space Nine to resupply. Then we’ll get some information at Quark’s. First things first I need to spend a few hours in a holosuite. Program Asran Alpha Two, how I’ve been longing to bring her back online.”

Eizen laughed, the last time Asran had said that he didn’t come out for a day and nearly bankrupted himself if it hadn’t been for Eizen threatening to jam a drinking glass in Quark’s ear. Eizen was interested because he heard that the shape shifting security officer was gone and he was eager to test the limits of the new officer. Maybe there was some money to be made.