Hello all. It's been awhile since I last posted one of my archival fics to the site. Enjoy.
---------
Tim Jewett 06/30/01
Mordancy Sarcasm Theatre 4000
All belongs to whom it belongs to. Also, please don't sue me. Thank you
In the not too distant future...
Where reality does not exist.
An evil rich kid named Artlu...
Was starting to get really pissed.
"I send 'fics to him and his friends...
Ones that should really warp their minds. (lalala)
But he's shot every single one down...
And the plan called for nothing of the kind!"
Now keep in mind that Tim can't control...
How his friends act and behave.
And he tries to keep them acting fairly sane...
With the help of a weighted stave.
If you're wondering how he eats and breaths...
And other science facts, (lalala)
Just repeat to yourself, "Don't go there bub!"
and you really should relax...
For... Mordancy Sarcasm Theater 4000! (wohw wohw)
(Satellite of Lust. Not really any particular time. Just now)
Tim: Heya freakoids! Sorry It's late, but the censors only recently got through with reviewing this. After hearing their comments, I did what I always did, and sent out the UNedited version instead. Here's what happened three days ago. Yes folks, it took the censors THREE DAYS to get throught this. Anyways, here it is.
(SOL. End of June)
Graham: Guys, what are you doing in that Bunker?
Zoom: Tim's playing Tomb Raider.
Graham: SO?
Zoom: He was bored of the "game"
Graham: If you're saying what I think you're saying... There had better be more room in that there bunker!
Max: Sure. Pass the popcorn, wouldja Zoom?
(Inside the room O stuff)
Tim: Lesse, I've gone through all the games, and the movie, all that's left is the deathmatch with Lady Croft herself. (A bucket of Water drops down over Tim)
Lara: Shall we get Started?
Tim: Gladly. (They draw weapons. Lara a high powered shotgun, Tim and smaller Pistol, far more accurate. Tim decides to take the bouncing route lara Never could in the games, and hops from wall to wall, shooting until he is out of ammo. Lara does the same to the shotgun, and they draw swords kept at the side of the arena. They rush at each other, weapons drawn. Suddenly, The Alarm rings, Startling Laras, Tim uses this distraction to vault over her, spin in midiar, grab her by the most convienient handholds she has to offer, fling her into the wall, and leave. As he exits, he pauses)
Tim: Oh, So long, and Thanks for the Mammaries...
Graham: Okay, that was a long and drawn out excuse for a boob joke. Admit it.
Tim: I regret nothing.
(Outer room)
Tim: Hey, Simon and Garfunkle are buzzin'. Graham, get the invention!
Artlu: Hello. I have no invention this week. I had one for this week, but decided to make it even better than it was, so nothing here.
Tim: Mine's just something I've been putzing around with for a few years called the Translate-O-matic. It can take any input and instantly convert it into another language.
(He and Graham demonstrate with various languages)
Grahama: Say, Who's the guest?
Artlu: Mina, from Sailor Moon.
Tim: Oh, she can speak english. We don't need the Translator then. Put it back Graham. (Graham drags it offscreen) Oh, what's the fic.
Artlu: Just a Thinkerfic called "A Chri-"
Tim: GRAHAM, BRING IT BACK HERE!
Mina: Am I late?
Tim: Yep. Almost in time for the fic.
(The sirens wail as Tim, Mina, and Graham holding the tranlator, rush into the theatre)
(The door sequence is on vacation. Please bear with us)
Tim sits in the middle, Mina two seats two his right, and Graham two to his left.
Max: Let's get it on!
>It is me again.
All: AHHH!
Mina: Don't sneak up on us like that!
>The mad scienct of Sailor Moon
Graham: Scienct- a diminutive scientist.
Tim: I shall call him... Mini- Thinker!
>and Pokemon bad story writter.
Tim: If you say so, I'm not arguing...
>Samphoo ask for a neko,
Graham: Who's Samphoo?
Tim: Well, I do know that a guy named Mouse has an infatuation with her, and she's madly in love with a guy name Rama.
>which means cat, and Meowth's a cat.
Mina: No, really? I thought he was a dog!
>Washu attack for Christmas Pokemon story.
Tim: Hm... Washu... If you'll excuse me... I'm going to go temporarily psychotic and drool over Washu's fully adult form. EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!
Mina: Is he like this often?
Graham: No, just when his libido's gone overdrive over a cute redhead...
Tim: Okay, I'm better now.
Mina: What exactly does "Washu attack for Christmas" mean?
Graham: Ummm, Washu tests out her latest invention on christmas, and...
Tim and Graham: (Singing) Oh, It's Christmas at ground Zero...
>I hope this will fit the bill, or not.
Mina: Huh?
Tim: I think he's saying he wants this thing MST'd...
>Sign
>Dr. Thinker
Graham: [This space for rent]
Tim: [Growf]
>=================================================
Mina: Wow, that's the worst Algebra problem I've ever seen!
>A Christmas Fit For A Pokemon
Tim: But made for killing digimon.
>A Pokemon Story Written by Dr. Thinker.
Graham: Is it even possible for statues to be given PHD's?
Mina: Apparently...
>Note 1: Ash Ketchum,
Graham: Has commited suicide after facing the harsh reality that he can never "Catch 'em all."
>his friends, his rivials, and his enemies
Tim: All own the basic equvalent of a platoon of heavy weaponry. Just a word of warning.
>are all owned by Nintendo Inc.; and 4Kids, Inc.
Graham: Doesn't that mean Nintendo supports slavery?
Tim: Well, if you think about it, Pokemon IS animal abuse.
>Note 2: Part of this story is based on Yellow Game Cart of Pokemon.
Mina: That part is the introduction, which you are now reading.
>In it, Gary has a Eeve that does what to use a stone
Mina: So it does What?
Graham: well, it has the name "Eeve" so, whatever it is, I hope it's nothing like that...
Tim: And Delia begat Ash, and Ash and Misty begat several times... And then they begat some more... and the next day, they decided to begat yet again...
>and it's the same story with Ash and his Pikachu.
Tim: Pokemon trainers and the pokemon that love them, today on Springer!
>Note 3: If you haven't watch the Pokemon eposides called "Abra
>and Pyshic Showdown"; "Tower of Terror"; "
All: TOUGH SHIT!
>*******************************************************
Mina: See how many you can catch on your tongue!
>Snow appears.
Tim: That's snow cream!
>Ash Ketchum and his friends saw a blue winter coat.
Graham: It was walking all by itself.
Tim: So Felicia owns it?
Graham: Or you.
Tim: Whatever.
>"Look at what Santa Claus bought me!" said Gary.
All: CHA-CHING!
>"It's only Dec 20, according to my Pokedex, Gary.
Graham: What happen?
>Claus doesn't into Dec. 24 mostly likely 12:00.." stated Ash.
Tim: Someone set up us the bomb.
Mina: We get signal.
Graham: What!
>"This section of Pokemon world acts like Sweden." stated Gary.
Mina: Main screen turn on
Graham: It's you!!
>"So it's start on Dec. 9."
Tim: How are you gentlemen!! All your base are belong to us. You are on the way to destruction.
Graham: What you say!!
>"Wrong. I think you miss it", Ash stated.
Tim: You have no chance to survive, make your time. HA HA HA HA....
>"Sweden's starts on Dec. 15.
Graham: Take off every zig!
>Anywhy, are you up to battle. Gary?"
Mina: You know what you doing.
>"Yes" answered Gary. "Go Eeve!"
All: Move zig. FOR GREAT JUSTICE!
Tim: Zero Wing. Mock it today...
>A head of small brown dog-like Pokemon pops up from the snow
>covered hill near Gary.
Tim: I'm gonna HAVE to nitpick here. Eevee is a cat!!!
Mina: But this is "Eeve"...
Tim: Good point... Nevermind.
>"Oh, I forget that you were out all ready." laughed Gary
Tim: Well, supposedly Eve and Lilith did have sex while Adam stood on...
Graham: Did you just suggest that "Eeve" came out of the closet?
>as Eeve shake off the rest of snow that was stuck on it.
>Eeve's snow shaking make a snow-pokemon in a Eeve shape. Gary
>and Ash share a laugh.
Mina: Now, now, don't fight over the laugh, boys...
>Ash command "GO! PIKACHU!"
Graham: Quinn command "DIE! AUTHOR!"
Quinn: I get to kill something?
>A yellow mouse appears with long thunder-like tail. This is Pikachu.
Quinn: Damn, and I thought I'd get a cameo!
(Quinn sulks below the seats)
>Gary command "Tackle Attack"
Mina: So where's this attack thingy so I can tackle it?
>Eeve run and jump on to Pikachu,
Tim: HEY! This isn't GS! They can't do that yet!
>but Pikachu dodge the attack.
All: Well, DUH.
>Ash shouted "Pikachu! Thunder!"
Graham: Graham shouted "Tim! Missile launcher!"
Tim: With pleasure.
>Pikachu shine like a Christmas tree light. From his check,
Mina: Well, at least the animals are getting paid for doing this...
Graham: Pokemon or a thinkerfic?
Mina: Ummm, yes.
>Pikachu shoots his "Thunder" attack. Which nuke Gary's Eeve.
Tim: But can it nuke me some lunch?
>"You have see the last of me!" Gary stated.
Mina: Wow, he gave up EASY!
>Ash check his hood of this red coat.
Graham: I'm Bob Vila and welcome to this red coat.
>"Dec. 20. Only 4 days into Christmas. Any present, othen a bike?"
Tim: How about Adult Skuld?
Graham: She's the goddes of the Future, not Present.
Tim: But the future is but a present to be...
Mina: Are you talking philosophy or hentai?
>"Water Pokemon." laughed Misty who wearing a pink coat. "That's
>how I get Stormie."
Tim: (old seadog) Looks like the weather's gonna be Starmie tonight, boys...
>"Hey! Cousin" remark young girl about the same age as Misty.
Graham: Okay, I'll mark her up thirty percent.
>"To bad the snow's to deep here or I would have battle you rivial here."
Mina: WHAT? Graham, check the translate-O-matic!
Graham: It's... It's... It's trying to install Windows 95 onto itself.
Tim: BUT IT HAS SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR!!!
Mina: Did YOU understand what she just said, Tim?
Tim: Huh? Oh, sure. "Too bad the snow's too deep, or I'd get a chance to battle your rival", whomever THAT is.
>"Rivails? Who? Crystral?" asked Misty quickly.
Mina: Either My english isn't as good as I thought it was or Thinker just made a line worthy of a dubbed episode...
>"Him" Crystral replied as she pointed to Ash.
Graham: (pointing to Mina) Her.
>"Oh." Misty remarks.
Tim: Please, just once, STOP SWITCHING TENSES!
>"Ash and Brock meet Crystral, Crystral meet Ash and Brock."
Mina: Well, aren't you going to introduce US?
>"I was hoping you will stop by my house. I'm hope you not a
>scoorges at cats."
Tim: Okay, "Scoorges". Even I'M at a loss here.
>"Why?" ask Ash
Graham: Are we being written this badly?
>"I'm giver of neko-like pokemon, Japanese for cats."
Mina: If Ash doesn't know Japanese, then what language has he been speaking this entire time?
Tim: Scrantonese.
Graham: For that matter, what language have YOU been speaking in the translated version?
Tim: Accentless British.
>"I'm heard about her on web. It not as popular as Susan's web-
>site." Brock stated. "But she still hogs the internet bandwith
Graham: Wow, I, Like, Totally swear that wasn't a shameless plug!
>like over thousand visits per week. Her home is in Saffon City."
Tim: Yes, she lives ove in Saffon city and ights wongs with he cat like pokemon like Aba and Pesian!
>"Yes. Guess what. The Gym Leader is allow me and my cat pokemon
>to stay at her location."
Graham: It's kinda too bad we've already used our Zero wing reference today...
>"Sabriana. I wonder how she's doing lately. I wonder if Haunter
>is doing Ok?"
Mina: Hey, I just thought of something. Is it possibly for ghost pokemon to die?
Tim: Well, according to GS, they're able to give birth, so...
>"Hey! He's the sleigh that Sabriana that told me that her father
>will be sending."
Graham: Hey, Magigician Trent's loose in the pokeverse! And he's randomly turning people into slieghs!
Tim: Only at christmas. Otherwise they would've been turned into a wisassed taxi.
MST4K Episode 17: Pokemon Christmas by Doctor Thinker
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>********************************************************
Tim: Wow, I didn't think anybody but me could stand to repeat the word "Oscar" so much.
Graham and Mina: (Cringe)
>On the sleigh, Ash saw a blue hooded person with a brown bread.
Mina: Wow, Santa's really changed his Image.
>It was the photograher at psyhic power that help him defeat
>Sabrina's pyshic pokemon
Tim: Psyhic. Noun. Uneducated backwood resident with the ability to speak mind to mind and fire his guns telekinically.
Graham: You sure it isn't a new pokemon type?
>and save make Sabrina laughed.
Graham: Why is the Translat-O-matic counting down?...
>He remenber get defeat in the first battle against Sabrina's Kadabra.
Graham: Remenber... That sounds like a Darkstalkers character.
>The test of the old man.
Tim: WHAT IS... TWO PLUS TWO!
>The finding of Ghost Pokemons in Pokemon Tower in Lavander Town.
Graham: As opposed to fighting Misty in Carulean, Erica in Caladon, And Giovanni in Varidian?
>The second battle, the appear of haunter,
>and the old man.
Mina: Ten to one says he's a pervert.
Graham: Good odds. All anime old men are perverts.
Tim: Take out "Anime" and you've got yourself a true statment...
>He also how in find out the true when he kissed Sabrina's mother.
Graham: Tim, Why is the international sign for Biohazard appearing on this thing's monitor?
Tim: Hand it over (Graham does so. Tim Whacks it) There you go, good as new.
Mina: The scary thing is that that actually worked.
>If you thought his jaw when he saw Kadabra rolling laughing, you
>should have saw this.
Graham: (Wielding a Chainsaw) And do we get any bubblegum?
>"Been a few months." Ash started.
Mina: ANOTHER legible thinker sentence! Unbelievable!
>"How are things going?" Sabrina's father asked.
Mina: And another! It's almost too much to take in!
>"Expect for a weekly battle between Gary or Team Rocket, Ok?
Graham: It just wouldn't be pokemon if those two goofs didn't show up.
Mina: Brock and Misty?
Tim: Score.
>Get a catch two new Pokemon. My seven was give away.
Mina: Whew, He's back to his normal illegibility
>My eight pokemon is at Prof. Oak." remark Ash.
Tim: Actually, that statment was accurate. Muk does have a tendency to Jump on top of Oak all the time.
Mina: You had better not follow that up with a hentai comment.
>"And Charamander just turn into Charmelon."
Mina: He's Charfruity!
>"Great.", Sabrina's father said.
Tim: Whipping out a shotgun and shooting the thousands of typo demons plaguing him and the author.
>********************************************************
Graham: How is it we're having a blizzard? It's Almost July!
Tim: Maybe we've drifted south of the Equator, I dunno.
>A new house is beening make right behind the Temple-Like Gym of
>Sabrina.
Tim: Query. Who is make and how can a house hold a bludgeoning device?
>She still uses her pyshic powers time to time, but not on her friends,
>but on the trainer that still come. "Long time, no see Ash." Sabrina
>said. He was dress the samilar to her battle, she wearing a red suit.
Tim: It used to be white.
>"Oh, hi Crystral. How's the Meowths coming."
Mina: Hey! You stop talking about my breeding program!
>"Fine. How's the Christmas coming."
Tim: Fine. How's the spellchecking coming?
Graham: (Thinker) Spell...check?
>"I having a hard time trying not to use my psyhic power to find
>out what my gifts are.
Tim: Remember Tigris's favorite line?
Graham: I think so...
Tim: "When you're psychic, It's really hard not to cheat on tests".
>But lucky, my pyhsic father decide on Christmas story.
>Oh, if I in this outfit, I was just battle against another gym trainer.
>For next 4 days, the Gym is closed."
Mina: Lovely! Useless information for your everyday life!
>********************************************************
>The big Pokemall in Saffon City.
Tim: Is that where Ranma from Sheep's fic was headed?
>"Hmm. I wonder what Misty would like. She's a water pokemon.
Graham: WHA???
Mina: Then would Ami count as an Ice type?
>Hmmm. She been bugging me about that dumb bike. Hmmm......"
Graham: Pikachu's been zapping him so much he's holding a current!
>He stops at small bulletion board.
Mina: After running straight into it, facefirst.
>BIKE-R-US.
>CHRISTMAS SPECIAL - ALL BIKES ARE $1. FREE POKEMON
>WITH EVERY BIKE."
Tim: How do you expect to make money with only ONE bike selling for a buck, and a free pokemon besides? Hell, Pokeballs cost three bucks!
>Between, "Computer Store", and "Toy Market".
Mina: Wonder what those places sell...
>"That sounds too good to be true!"
Graham: Maybe because it is.
>Ash stand out.
Tim: In traffic!
>-----------------------------------------------------------------
Mina: Wow, Hangman's gone to new heights...
Tim: Yeah, like the time I did "Don Quixote De La Mancha" as a puzzle.
>The bike show was more then bikes, any two or three bikes.
>"Excuse me." Ash at.
Graham: Pok-E-Mail!
Tim: So AOL Is POL?
>"I'm John. At your Christmas helper." laugh John.
>"I'm look for a gift on Misty." remark Misty.
Tim: Look about halfway between her brow and the ground.
Graham: What a low-brow joke.
>"Oh. Misty, the Would-Be Gym Leader of Cerauleon City."
>"You know here?" ask Ash.
Tim: Well I WORK HERE!
>"Yes. Even the story behind her. In fact, I think I know the
>bike, you want and of course, the type pokemon, I give you."
Mina: So he's been stalking them?
Graham: He's the jigglypuff in disguise!
>In a battle, she win, but beside on become more powerful. Hope
>you don't mind. The bike, his unwrap, but the Pokemon are boxed
>and wrap."
Mina: Wow, I doubt Bunny's ever been this confused... Even in Math class...
>"It's only two days before Christmas. He's your dollar."
Graham: Wow, Trent's on a spree...
>"Thanks. Merry Christmas."
>-----------------------------------------------------------------
>Santa Claus was look at his Tele-Scope.
Tim: All with me now. One... Two... Three...
All: E-nun-ci-ate!
>The day clock in his map room told him it was 11:34 at Dec. 24
Graham: Don't you mean December 24th at 11:34?
Tim: AM or PM?
>"So Ashire Ketchum, Misty Rivers
All: (singing) Don't go chasin' waterfalls, please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to...
>and Brock Stone
Tim: Add a D and that's an accurate description.
>are all at Sabrina's house as well as Crystral Lakes.
Tim: Okay, if Misty turns out to have a third cousin with the last name "Waterfall" I'm screaming and severely beating Thinker. On principle.
>Gary is in a hotel.
Mina: With all those cheerleaders, are you sure it wasn't a motel?
Tim: Mina, He's ELEVEN!
>Oh, well. What didi Ash ask for?" ask Santa turn away.
Graham: Santa Turn away! The christmas gift for all you spoiled children! He asks you a question, then snubs you like the dolt you are!
>"Looks like a Pokemon again this year is a top of his year. He
>just get his right to catch and train Pokemon this tome." Mrs.
>Claus replied.
Tim: Gone with the wind or Oscar singing his self praises?
Mina: HUH?
Tim: Mrs. Claus did say "This tome", so...
>"Guess what Jessie Smith and James Holiday are trying to trick
>people against.
Mina: Comftorable yet fashionable clothing!
Graham: Inflatable technologies!
Tim: Antidisestablishmentarianism!
>They are in there." said a elf, Ordas.
Mina: THAT cleared a whole lot up...
>"Still up to they're old tricks. Get my sleigh really. I'm really
>to go!" Santa Claus.
Graham: But tricks are for kids!
Mina: And high classed prostitutes!
>********************************************************
Tim: Wow, I didn't think anybody but me could stand to repeat the word "Oscar" so much.
Graham and Mina: (Cringe)
>On the sleigh, Ash saw a blue hooded person with a brown bread.
Mina: Wow, Santa's really changed his Image.
>It was the photograher at psyhic power that help him defeat
>Sabrina's pyshic pokemon
Tim: Psyhic. Noun. Uneducated backwood resident with the ability to speak mind to mind and fire his guns telekinically.
Graham: You sure it isn't a new pokemon type?
>and save make Sabrina laughed.
Graham: Why is the Translat-O-matic counting down?...
>He remenber get defeat in the first battle against Sabrina's Kadabra.
Graham: Remenber... That sounds like a Darkstalkers character.
>The test of the old man.
Tim: WHAT IS... TWO PLUS TWO!
>The finding of Ghost Pokemons in Pokemon Tower in Lavander Town.
Graham: As opposed to fighting Misty in Carulean, Erica in Caladon, And Giovanni in Varidian?
>The second battle, the appear of haunter,
>and the old man.
Mina: Ten to one says he's a pervert.
Graham: Good odds. All anime old men are perverts.
Tim: Take out "Anime" and you've got yourself a true statment...
>He also how in find out the true when he kissed Sabrina's mother.
Graham: Tim, Why is the international sign for Biohazard appearing on this thing's monitor?
Tim: Hand it over (Graham does so. Tim Whacks it) There you go, good as new.
Mina: The scary thing is that that actually worked.
>If you thought his jaw when he saw Kadabra rolling laughing, you
>should have saw this.
Graham: (Wielding a Chainsaw) And do we get any bubblegum?
>"Been a few months." Ash started.
Mina: ANOTHER legible thinker sentence! Unbelievable!
>"How are things going?" Sabrina's father asked.
Mina: And another! It's almost too much to take in!
>"Expect for a weekly battle between Gary or Team Rocket, Ok?
Graham: It just wouldn't be pokemon if those two goofs didn't show up.
Mina: Brock and Misty?
Tim: Score.
>Get a catch two new Pokemon. My seven was give away.
Mina: Whew, He's back to his normal illegibility
>My eight pokemon is at Prof. Oak." remark Ash.
Tim: Actually, that statment was accurate. Muk does have a tendency to Jump on top of Oak all the time.
Mina: You had better not follow that up with a hentai comment.
>"And Charamander just turn into Charmelon."
Mina: He's Charfruity!
>"Great.", Sabrina's father said.
Tim: Whipping out a shotgun and shooting the thousands of typo demons plaguing him and the author.
>********************************************************
Graham: How is it we're having a blizzard? It's Almost July!
Tim: Maybe we've drifted south of the Equator, I dunno.
>A new house is beening make right behind the Temple-Like Gym of
>Sabrina.
Tim: Query. Who is make and how can a house hold a bludgeoning device?
>She still uses her pyshic powers time to time, but not on her friends,
>but on the trainer that still come. "Long time, no see Ash." Sabrina
>said. He was dress the samilar to her battle, she wearing a red suit.
Tim: It used to be white.
>"Oh, hi Crystral. How's the Meowths coming."
Mina: Hey! You stop talking about my breeding program!
>"Fine. How's the Christmas coming."
Tim: Fine. How's the spellchecking coming?
Graham: (Thinker) Spell...check?
>"I having a hard time trying not to use my psyhic power to find
>out what my gifts are.
Tim: Remember Tigris's favorite line?
Graham: I think so...
Tim: "When you're psychic, It's really hard not to cheat on tests".
>But lucky, my pyhsic father decide on Christmas story.
>Oh, if I in this outfit, I was just battle against another gym trainer.
>For next 4 days, the Gym is closed."
Mina: Lovely! Useless information for your everyday life!
>********************************************************
>The big Pokemall in Saffon City.
Tim: Is that where Ranma from Sheep's fic was headed?
>"Hmm. I wonder what Misty would like. She's a water pokemon.
Graham: WHA???
Mina: Then would Ami count as an Ice type?
>Hmmm. She been bugging me about that dumb bike. Hmmm......"
Graham: Pikachu's been zapping him so much he's holding a current!
>He stops at small bulletion board.
Mina: After running straight into it, facefirst.
>BIKE-R-US.
>CHRISTMAS SPECIAL - ALL BIKES ARE $1. FREE POKEMON
>WITH EVERY BIKE."
Tim: How do you expect to make money with only ONE bike selling for a buck, and a free pokemon besides? Hell, Pokeballs cost three bucks!
>Between, "Computer Store", and "Toy Market".
Mina: Wonder what those places sell...
>"That sounds too good to be true!"
Graham: Maybe because it is.
>Ash stand out.
Tim: In traffic!
>-----------------------------------------------------------------
Mina: Wow, Hangman's gone to new heights...
Tim: Yeah, like the time I did "Don Quixote De La Mancha" as a puzzle.
>The bike show was more then bikes, any two or three bikes.
>"Excuse me." Ash at.
Graham: Pok-E-Mail!
Tim: So AOL Is POL?
>"I'm John. At your Christmas helper." laugh John.
>"I'm look for a gift on Misty." remark Misty.
Tim: Look about halfway between her brow and the ground.
Graham: What a low-brow joke.
>"Oh. Misty, the Would-Be Gym Leader of Cerauleon City."
>"You know here?" ask Ash.
Tim: Well I WORK HERE!
>"Yes. Even the story behind her. In fact, I think I know the
>bike, you want and of course, the type pokemon, I give you."
Mina: So he's been stalking them?
Graham: He's the jigglypuff in disguise!
>In a battle, she win, but beside on become more powerful. Hope
>you don't mind. The bike, his unwrap, but the Pokemon are boxed
>and wrap."
Mina: Wow, I doubt Bunny's ever been this confused... Even in Math class...
>"It's only two days before Christmas. He's your dollar."
Graham: Wow, Trent's on a spree...
>"Thanks. Merry Christmas."
>-----------------------------------------------------------------
>Santa Claus was look at his Tele-Scope.
Tim: All with me now. One... Two... Three...
All: E-nun-ci-ate!
>The day clock in his map room told him it was 11:34 at Dec. 24
Graham: Don't you mean December 24th at 11:34?
Tim: AM or PM?
>"So Ashire Ketchum, Misty Rivers
All: (singing) Don't go chasin' waterfalls, please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to...
>and Brock Stone
Tim: Add a D and that's an accurate description.
>are all at Sabrina's house as well as Crystral Lakes.
Tim: Okay, if Misty turns out to have a third cousin with the last name "Waterfall" I'm screaming and severely beating Thinker. On principle.
>Gary is in a hotel.
Mina: With all those cheerleaders, are you sure it wasn't a motel?
Tim: Mina, He's ELEVEN!
>Oh, well. What didi Ash ask for?" ask Santa turn away.
Graham: Santa Turn away! The christmas gift for all you spoiled children! He asks you a question, then snubs you like the dolt you are!
>"Looks like a Pokemon again this year is a top of his year. He
>just get his right to catch and train Pokemon this tome." Mrs.
>Claus replied.
Tim: Gone with the wind or Oscar singing his self praises?
Mina: HUH?
Tim: Mrs. Claus did say "This tome", so...
>"Guess what Jessie Smith and James Holiday are trying to trick
>people against.
Mina: Comftorable yet fashionable clothing!
Graham: Inflatable technologies!
Tim: Antidisestablishmentarianism!
>They are in there." said a elf, Ordas.
Mina: THAT cleared a whole lot up...
>"Still up to they're old tricks. Get my sleigh really. I'm really
>to go!" Santa Claus.
Graham: But tricks are for kids!
Mina: And high classed prostitutes!
>********************************************************
-
Ryushikaze
- Jedi Master
- Posts: 1072
- Joined: 2006-01-15 02:15am
- Location: Chapel Hill, NC
>At Sabrina's Gym.
Tim: They always say you're getting in shape but you always get flabbier and flabbier because you don't stick to the regimen!
>Two people and a cat pokemon named Meowth are near the Gym
>waiting for St. Nick.
Graham: The pokemon was a Nidoking but it was still named Meowth!
>A blue hair 16-year rich-boy name James Holiday and his partner,
Mina: Billy?
>a blazzing red hair 16-year working girl name Jessie Smith.
Graham: I always wondered how Team Rocket got money...
Tim: Underage prostitutes and the effeminate outlaws that love them, next springer!
Mina: Blazzing?
>Meowth, "Hey! It's getting close to 12:00. Get ready to teach St.
>Nick at lesson in greed!."
Mina: And next, the other six deadly sins!
>A funny laugh is heard.
Tim: That's not funny.
>Out of the fireplace, Santa Claus come down with a BOMB.
Graham: Could this be the psychotic Santa from Sluggy freelance?
Tim: If it is his directions are WAY messed up! Kanto Japan is a good quarter of the world away from Jersey!
>Meowth, "Reasle Pokemon!"
Mina: Weasel pokemon, WHAT?
>Crystral appears. "To unite all people in the nation. To make
>sure the real of Pokemon are followed. To make sure evil is not
>around. I'm the Pokemon League Elite Member!"
>"The Elite Member of Cats Pokemon. Meowth get her!"
All: (Snoring)
Tim: (Yawning) Another lame intro... Lemme recheck that one... Okay, Translation for the Thinker-Impaired. "To unite everyone under one nation" No clue why anyone would want a worldwide country. It'd fuck our economy SO bad, anyways "To make sure the real... rules, probably... of pokemon are followed. To scatter evil wherever I happen to be, I'm the pokemon Elite member in charge of cats" Bullshit, I am... "Meowth, Get her"
Mina: Thank you. The translation make the sentences understandable, but still leaves us CLUELESS to the meaning behind them!
Graham: Welcome to a dubbed Sailor Moon ep, folks!
>"Oh, I'm rember you guys,
Mina: I thought you were Crystral...
>I give you him! Go, Meowth!"
Tim: That was grammatically correct... In spanish.
>A green Meowth appears as well as a Charamander.
All: GREEN?
Tim: Whose cooking did it eat?
>"Hey. Team Rocket. You should I told Meowth to be quiet as mouse."
Mina: Ow... Head spinning...
>A small pokemon, but with insteand of white is green. The pokemon
>contain a female pokemon type called Jynx.
Tim: I think Thinker's sentences keep deleting themselves. NOBODY can skip over that much of a sentence and not recognize it. Unless he did it on purpose.
>Ash as quicky pull out his Pokedex. The information was the following
All: BITE ME!
>JYNX: A ancient pyshic pokemon. Rumors has it, the most of
>the Jynx are at the north pole. A few are still around,
>but no one have fun anyone.
All: (Singing) "It's not usual to be loved by anyone... It's not unusual to have fun with anyone... But when I see you having fun with anyone... It's not unusual to hear me cry "I wanna die!"
>A Gengar, a ghost pokemon appear,
Tim: GOOD FOR IT!!!
>and well as a Klasabra.
Tim: And we all know how much any Sailor needs a Bra.
Mina: HEY! Just because I couldn't find a clean one this morn.. umm...
>Sabrina stands in the door way. "Merry Christmas. Team Rocket!"
Graham: And a happy blastoff!
>All the Pokemon use the most powerful attack
Graham: Explosion, or Hyper beam?
>and Team Rocket was blast out throw the roof.
Tim: Think Thinker's a Sadist? He just had somebody throw a roof after Team Rocket.
>Santa Claus return Jynx to his Pokeball and
>stand hand out gift. Santa Claus then leave up the fireplace.
Tim: Where a fire was "Blazzing" which set off the bomb jolly boy had been holding.
>---------------------------------------------------------
>The next morning, Ash and his friends get up.
Tim: Do a little dance, make a little love, then get down later that night.
>"Sabrina, get my present for Misty out of the garge. Ok?"
Graham: Tim, You're better at this kind of wierd trivia
Tim: No damn clue what a Garge is. Maybe it's a Garage...
>"Ok"
Mina: No it isn't. You're just trying to make me feel better.
>Sabrina was out of the room for 5 mintunes.
Graham: FIVE MINUTES? Just how damn big a garage do they have back there?
>A elevator-type door open in the back of the room, out comes Ash's
>present.
Tim: It was a rabid Tauros. It killed everyone. the end.
Graham: Tim I thought you were against snuff fics.
Tim: Yes, but It's 11:44 PM and I'm desperate to finish this MST'ing before tommorow.
Mina: I can tell, we've just broken the fourth wall.
Tim: Actually, I never installed it...
>"That's your present to me. A bike?
Tim: No, Ash said as he pulled down his pants.
Mina: Lemon ending ahoy!
>What that in the basket?"
Graham: Oh, a Trinket, Maybe a Tasket.
>"A gift."
All: NO DUH!
>Misty reach in...and unwraped a present. Misty unwrap it and toss
>the lid off.
Graham: But before she did that. She wripped the lid off and peered inside, but not before opening her present to see what Ash had given her.
>She found a pokemon ball.
Mina: It was Bulbasaur's.
>"Go Pokeball!"
Tim: Out! Out damn Spherical object! Begone from mine presence!
>The Pokemon was a winged headed Squirtle creature, a Wartortle.
Mina: It was a flighty, lightheaded pokemon.
>"A Wartotle?
Tim: No, A wartortle! You saw the script! Get it right!
>I never have a starting pokemon before! Thanks."
Graham: You still don't. This is an EVOLUTION! of a starting pokemon.
Tim: Actually, anyone's first poke is their starter. What she MEANT to say was "Gee, I've never had an RB starter even though I'm utterly not supposed to know about the videogames, since I have a role in them!
>Misty kissed Ash on the left check.
Graham: Then they proceeded to get down to buisiness!
Tim: So it was MISTY who was the whore, NOT Jessie!
>-------------------THE END---------------------------------------
>MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL PEOPLE, WRITTERS AND
>MISTING TO ALL THE PEOPLE AT SHINJI ANIME MISTING
>VAULT!
All: And a merry reading to you to!
>Sign
>Dr. Thinker
Tim: In respect, let us all think for half a moment.
Graham: My head hurts.
>-----------------------------------------------------------------
Outer room
Mina: I'm going to go lie down for awhile (She leaves)
Graham: Considering what we just MST'd, That's understandable.
Tim: Well, this was a Thinkerfic. That's all I can say about it. It was mostly incomprehensible, but if it were written in engish would have been a good story.
Graham: Natch.
Tim: Seeya!
(Signal end)
THE END
>"I having a hard time trying not to use my psyhic power to find
>out what my gifts are.
>But lucky, my pyhsic father decide on Christmas story.
>Oh, if I in this outfit, I was just battle against another gym trainer.
>For next 4 days, the Gym is closed."
Send Email to Me at Ktnablade@AOL.com
or Graham at Gmantis14@AOL.com
or Max at ThisAddressDoesNotExist@AOL.com
Wow. I had tried to get this done before July, but as I actually finish this Author's not up, It's officially July first. I'm done now, and all can enjoy. And now I'm ready to tackle 18 in a few days, which is RPM by flynn. Oh, and, as always...
Comments appreciated, Flames laughed at.
Tim: They always say you're getting in shape but you always get flabbier and flabbier because you don't stick to the regimen!
>Two people and a cat pokemon named Meowth are near the Gym
>waiting for St. Nick.
Graham: The pokemon was a Nidoking but it was still named Meowth!
>A blue hair 16-year rich-boy name James Holiday and his partner,
Mina: Billy?
>a blazzing red hair 16-year working girl name Jessie Smith.
Graham: I always wondered how Team Rocket got money...
Tim: Underage prostitutes and the effeminate outlaws that love them, next springer!
Mina: Blazzing?
>Meowth, "Hey! It's getting close to 12:00. Get ready to teach St.
>Nick at lesson in greed!."
Mina: And next, the other six deadly sins!
>A funny laugh is heard.
Tim: That's not funny.
>Out of the fireplace, Santa Claus come down with a BOMB.
Graham: Could this be the psychotic Santa from Sluggy freelance?
Tim: If it is his directions are WAY messed up! Kanto Japan is a good quarter of the world away from Jersey!
>Meowth, "Reasle Pokemon!"
Mina: Weasel pokemon, WHAT?
>Crystral appears. "To unite all people in the nation. To make
>sure the real of Pokemon are followed. To make sure evil is not
>around. I'm the Pokemon League Elite Member!"
>"The Elite Member of Cats Pokemon. Meowth get her!"
All: (Snoring)
Tim: (Yawning) Another lame intro... Lemme recheck that one... Okay, Translation for the Thinker-Impaired. "To unite everyone under one nation" No clue why anyone would want a worldwide country. It'd fuck our economy SO bad, anyways "To make sure the real... rules, probably... of pokemon are followed. To scatter evil wherever I happen to be, I'm the pokemon Elite member in charge of cats" Bullshit, I am... "Meowth, Get her"
Mina: Thank you. The translation make the sentences understandable, but still leaves us CLUELESS to the meaning behind them!
Graham: Welcome to a dubbed Sailor Moon ep, folks!
>"Oh, I'm rember you guys,
Mina: I thought you were Crystral...
>I give you him! Go, Meowth!"
Tim: That was grammatically correct... In spanish.
>A green Meowth appears as well as a Charamander.
All: GREEN?
Tim: Whose cooking did it eat?
>"Hey. Team Rocket. You should I told Meowth to be quiet as mouse."
Mina: Ow... Head spinning...
>A small pokemon, but with insteand of white is green. The pokemon
>contain a female pokemon type called Jynx.
Tim: I think Thinker's sentences keep deleting themselves. NOBODY can skip over that much of a sentence and not recognize it. Unless he did it on purpose.
>Ash as quicky pull out his Pokedex. The information was the following
All: BITE ME!
>JYNX: A ancient pyshic pokemon. Rumors has it, the most of
>the Jynx are at the north pole. A few are still around,
>but no one have fun anyone.
All: (Singing) "It's not usual to be loved by anyone... It's not unusual to have fun with anyone... But when I see you having fun with anyone... It's not unusual to hear me cry "I wanna die!"
>A Gengar, a ghost pokemon appear,
Tim: GOOD FOR IT!!!
>and well as a Klasabra.
Tim: And we all know how much any Sailor needs a Bra.
Mina: HEY! Just because I couldn't find a clean one this morn.. umm...
>Sabrina stands in the door way. "Merry Christmas. Team Rocket!"
Graham: And a happy blastoff!
>All the Pokemon use the most powerful attack
Graham: Explosion, or Hyper beam?
>and Team Rocket was blast out throw the roof.
Tim: Think Thinker's a Sadist? He just had somebody throw a roof after Team Rocket.
>Santa Claus return Jynx to his Pokeball and
>stand hand out gift. Santa Claus then leave up the fireplace.
Tim: Where a fire was "Blazzing" which set off the bomb jolly boy had been holding.
>---------------------------------------------------------
>The next morning, Ash and his friends get up.
Tim: Do a little dance, make a little love, then get down later that night.
>"Sabrina, get my present for Misty out of the garge. Ok?"
Graham: Tim, You're better at this kind of wierd trivia
Tim: No damn clue what a Garge is. Maybe it's a Garage...
>"Ok"
Mina: No it isn't. You're just trying to make me feel better.
>Sabrina was out of the room for 5 mintunes.
Graham: FIVE MINUTES? Just how damn big a garage do they have back there?
>A elevator-type door open in the back of the room, out comes Ash's
>present.
Tim: It was a rabid Tauros. It killed everyone. the end.
Graham: Tim I thought you were against snuff fics.
Tim: Yes, but It's 11:44 PM and I'm desperate to finish this MST'ing before tommorow.
Mina: I can tell, we've just broken the fourth wall.
Tim: Actually, I never installed it...
>"That's your present to me. A bike?
Tim: No, Ash said as he pulled down his pants.
Mina: Lemon ending ahoy!
>What that in the basket?"
Graham: Oh, a Trinket, Maybe a Tasket.
>"A gift."
All: NO DUH!
>Misty reach in...and unwraped a present. Misty unwrap it and toss
>the lid off.
Graham: But before she did that. She wripped the lid off and peered inside, but not before opening her present to see what Ash had given her.
>She found a pokemon ball.
Mina: It was Bulbasaur's.
>"Go Pokeball!"
Tim: Out! Out damn Spherical object! Begone from mine presence!
>The Pokemon was a winged headed Squirtle creature, a Wartortle.
Mina: It was a flighty, lightheaded pokemon.
>"A Wartotle?
Tim: No, A wartortle! You saw the script! Get it right!
>I never have a starting pokemon before! Thanks."
Graham: You still don't. This is an EVOLUTION! of a starting pokemon.
Tim: Actually, anyone's first poke is their starter. What she MEANT to say was "Gee, I've never had an RB starter even though I'm utterly not supposed to know about the videogames, since I have a role in them!
>Misty kissed Ash on the left check.
Graham: Then they proceeded to get down to buisiness!
Tim: So it was MISTY who was the whore, NOT Jessie!
>-------------------THE END---------------------------------------
>MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL PEOPLE, WRITTERS AND
>MISTING TO ALL THE PEOPLE AT SHINJI ANIME MISTING
>VAULT!
All: And a merry reading to you to!
>Sign
>Dr. Thinker
Tim: In respect, let us all think for half a moment.
Graham: My head hurts.
>-----------------------------------------------------------------
Outer room
Mina: I'm going to go lie down for awhile (She leaves)
Graham: Considering what we just MST'd, That's understandable.
Tim: Well, this was a Thinkerfic. That's all I can say about it. It was mostly incomprehensible, but if it were written in engish would have been a good story.
Graham: Natch.
Tim: Seeya!
(Signal end)
THE END
>"I having a hard time trying not to use my psyhic power to find
>out what my gifts are.
>But lucky, my pyhsic father decide on Christmas story.
>Oh, if I in this outfit, I was just battle against another gym trainer.
>For next 4 days, the Gym is closed."
Send Email to Me at Ktnablade@AOL.com
or Graham at Gmantis14@AOL.com
or Max at ThisAddressDoesNotExist@AOL.com
Wow. I had tried to get this done before July, but as I actually finish this Author's not up, It's officially July first. I'm done now, and all can enjoy. And now I'm ready to tackle 18 in a few days, which is RPM by flynn. Oh, and, as always...
Comments appreciated, Flames laughed at.
-
Sidewinder
- Sith Acolyte
- Posts: 5466
- Joined: 2005-05-18 10:23pm
- Location: Feasting on those who fell in battle
- Contact:
Thanks for breaking it up into three pieces. It makes the MST easier to handle-- damn was that painful to read! (I suspect English is NOT the original author's first language.)
Please do not make Americans fight giant monsters.
Those gun nuts do not understand the meaning of "overkill," and will simply use weapon after weapon of mass destruction (WMD) until the monster is dead, or until they run out of weapons.
They have more WMD than there are monsters for us to fight. (More insanity here.)
Those gun nuts do not understand the meaning of "overkill," and will simply use weapon after weapon of mass destruction (WMD) until the monster is dead, or until they run out of weapons.
They have more WMD than there are monsters for us to fight. (More insanity here.)
-
Ryushikaze
- Jedi Master
- Posts: 1072
- Joined: 2006-01-15 02:15am
- Location: Chapel Hill, NC
Because people have been amused by my MSTings?Satori wrote:Is there a reason why you chose to torture us so?
Oh, you think this was bad, try reading the fanfics written by "Oscar". Try reading them without MST accompaniment.Oh, gawd, now I have to go read something by Erina-chan or BenRG to clear my mind of this yuckiness.
Anyways, I'll put the next one up in a few days.