GNOME HUNTER!

[Captain Cyran]

You know that you portray all of us almost flawlessly right?

Not quite... I still don't know where everyone gets the idea that I'm insanely jealous...

Or that I'm an insane mass murderer...

What?!

[Darth Fanboy]

GNOME HUNTER Five Part Two: If words Could Describle, they would go here....


Writers Guild HQ a.k.a Ground Zero

Denryle: Black Mages, we've been assigned to Magic Detail in the second line behind the BoTM Paramilitary Gorillas and HAB heavy armor. You're to only use magic with a wide range of Damage to take out as many Gnomish units as possible. Writer's guild non combative units have evacuated the area, so don't worry about collateral damage.

BLack Mage Kuja: Minister, what kind of odds are we facing?

Denryle: Lets just say that we'd have been better off staying in Vegas.

Black Mage Cyran: What? No way/ THIS is it! Game over man! Game over!

black Mage Nitram: At least the HAB seem to be having a good time.

*Sea skimmer's m1-a1 leads the charge from an undergrund garage into the streets.*

Sea Skimmer: BEOwULF! Take the 3rd Division and cover the left flanks Vympel! Take the second division and ocver the left flanks. I've got the center under control. CRY HAVOC AND UNLEASH THE DOGS OF WAR!

*Kuja is nearly trampled by a paladin moving into position*

Kuja: gah! This is insane! They'll destroy the entire city before the gnomes get a chance!

Denryle: Once again, the Writer's guild finanical empire will take care of that, if we win. Good luck, I'll be at the command center.

* the Gnomish Front Lines *

JodoForce: BwahahahaHHAHAHAHAHHAHa Heavy Armor Brigade? This will be most entertaining! GNOMISH REDSHIRT FORCES! WIPE THEM OUT! Infantry charge! Overrun them with sheer numerical Superiority! GNomeTanks, Supress the HAB Armor!

* Cut back to the mages *


Kuja: FIRAGA! TARGET ALL!

*Gnomish REdhisrt soldiers burn but continue their charge, BoTM Gorilla forces begin to engage hand to hand*

Cyran: Shit! They're too close to our own lines!

Nitram: Minister Denryle was right about the odds, the HAB are killing those pathetic little gnome tanks with each shot but they're outnumbered atleast ten to one down there!

Kuja: LEts even it out, if we can't stop the Gnomish infantry then we'll go for the tanks, Concentrated Thunder spells, low level to conserve MP, hit as many gnomish tanks as possible.

*Thunder attacks rain down like lightnig on the Gnomish tanks, disabling and deefeating many, the HAB third division is still under heavy Gnomish attack and is being forced out of its positon.*

Cyran: wHy aren't they moving?

Tevar: They're disguising it well, look, they've intentionallymissed their opportunity for a few counterattacks, they're obviously luring gnomish forces in.

Nitram: Look! That building!

*GALE Forces set up in the building can be seen with sniper rifles, missle launchers, and grenade launchers sticking out from the window.*

Frank Hipper: (from the command center) fire NOW! Pave the Way for the HAB forces to FLank the Gnomish Center strike!

*The hail of firepower from the GALE position completely obliterates an entire city block. A chain reaction of explosions erupts from the cloud of smoke as Gnomish tanks and infantry are incinerated. The smell of buring gnome is putrid throughout the battlefield now.*

JodoForce: (From the Gnomish Mobile command) An excellent move, I'm not giving thes ehumans enough credit. *shell goes off nearby* Damned Artillery! Hmmmm, perhaps I should make the call.

Sea Skimmer: HAB FORces! BeoWolF has Smashed the Gnomish forces in his sector and is now flanking! PRess the Attack and trap them in! All Artillery, Give their rear units something to bitch about!

*Beowolfs forces rounded the corner of a city block and began hitting a very exposed group of GnomeTanks, who were completely unprepared. The Gnomes vainly attempted to counter, but in doing so exposed themselves to Sea Skimmers forces which had already been charging them. The 2nd divison cut off Gnomish support from the other side so that the other two flanks could wipe out forces between them.*

Kuja: That's great, maybe we can get down towards the infantry now and help there?

Cyran: Doesn't look like they need us, look!

*Indeed, the Justice League super soldiers had helped ease the numerical burden the BoTM forces were facing. Rob Smash was tearing trhough Gnomes with the Ferocity of a Roid Raging Wookie, entrails being strewn about with reckless ABandon. THe Cyborg Einhander meanwhile, literally became giddier with each kill as he kept a running total. his computerized brain never losing count.*

E Sno: ONE FRAG, TWO FRAG............Sixteen Frag....seventeen frag..............sixty two frag sixty three frag! BWAHAHHAHAHA!

*Stormbringer meanwhile, was using his power over the weather to great effect, Gusts of shear force win blowing down Gnomish throats at speeds of over 200mph, Rushing air into Gnomish Lungs until they burst, so fast their little lungs could not exhale. The were-bear Yosemite was fighting an entire cadre of gnomes that had tried to overpower him by climbing on top of him, with a mighty roar he shook them all off and he waved his powerful claws and tore the gnomes to ribbons.*

Kuja: What wasminister Denryle even talking about? I thought he said the odds were against us!

Cyran: FOr the Black Mages alone maybe, but these combined forces are Invincible!


flight 69 to New York from New Mexico

Captain: Attention all passengers this is Captain Schtuping, it appears we're going to have to divert our aircraft down south to Baltimore, air traffic over New YOrk is currently being denied to all civilian aircraft.

*Fanboy looks out the window and sees several military planes, except the planes were too small to be regular military aircraft.*

Fanboy: You gotta be fucking kidding me, (places two fingers on his forehead, driving his concentration inwards, and then back outwards again with an undetecable force. Using his Focus Vision of the Gods Fanboy is able to detect the hundreds of gnomish aircraft and the thousands of Gnomish tanks and the insurmountable numbers of Gnoish troops heading towards the city.) Damn, well this planes going to Baltimore, but I sure as hell aren't. Stewardess?

Male Steward: She isn't able to walk right now, what can i do for you?

Fanboy: Make sure all these passengers are strapped in. this is my stop.

Male Steward: Oh Im afraid I can;t do that sir, you see we're cruising at fifteen thousand feet and...

*Fanboy pulls boat oar out of overhead compartment, how he got in on we have no idea, and bashed male steward in the face*

Fanboy: Everyone buckle Up! Im opening the Emergency Exit!

*People Sit and laugh until Fanboy hefts the boat oar again and swings it, crashing the door handle off of its hinges into the sky. Fanboy is immediately sucked out of the place*

Fanboy: Aw hell, I should have thought about this a bit more. Okay, first to help those guys on the plane.

*Fanboy's telekinesis in mid air reattatches the door to the plane, with is then sealed shut with some low powered mind bullets*

Fanboy: That takes care of those guys, now to see if I can't land without making a mess.

*Using his levitation fanboy's descent is lowered, until he can see the Gnomish planes coming right at him in an attack pattern.*

Fanboy: Is this all they brought? From what I heard about the battle of Atlantis they should be able to field more stuff than this...time to do my new routine and light up like a star in the sky ja?

*The Sisterhood meanwhile had assembeld at the command center*

Innerbrat: Looks like we've held them back again, that was damned intense.

Duchess: Bah! Gnomes, I chew them up and spit them out at will!

Zaia: Girls, we need to go. Jmac, steal one of those Black Mage choppers and regroup. Then we'll return to Castle amazon and prepare for ....

Innerbrat: Do what now Listen in case you haven't noticed, we're winning! The HAB is pounding them into the dirt, the Super Soldiers have countered the gnomish infantry, the Gnomes dont stand a chance!

Zaia: YOu don't understand...

Verilon: *emerging from shadows* The attack was but a preliminary force. Standard Gnome military doctrine in large scale combined forces battle like this. We might have smashed them at ten to one odds, but now theyre going to send in a much larger force. With the losses we've taken and the fact that we've played every card we have, well, lets just say this is probably it.

Innerbrat: No....

Zaia: Believe it.

Verilon: You wont be able to escape in time, you might as well go down taking as many of these bastards with you. We can only hope that the Highguard can do this on their own.

Innerbrat: Highguard?

DuchesS: LOOK!

*Suddenly the sky began to turn black, Gnomish aricraft were approaching the city and swarms, and the sounds of earthquakes in the distance were that of hundreds of thousands of gnomes converging on the city.*

Sea SKimmer: I'll be damned...the cowardly bastards. Hmmmph, at least its not losing if they have to win like this. HAB Soldiers, never turn back! Look Death in the eye and punch him in the jaw! The Great Leader commands it!

Pablo Sanchez Sir...we're running low on ammunition, I can have some more brought in from Passchendale, but it would never reach in time and we've comitted so many of our personnel here...Our aerial units are on their way in but they'll be outnumbered too.

Sea Skimmer: So be it, although we advocate armor that doesn't mean we can't break their necks one by one.

*The Mages*

Kuja: (sniff!) guys this is it (sob!) Im gonna miss you!

Nitram: (whine) yeah, maybe we'll all get to go to heaven or something together right?

Kuja: We'll if there is a heaven, Cyran sure as heck isn't goung

Cyran: Waaaaaaaah!

Kuja: (weep_ Cyran, i'll always reget never getting to be the one to kill you!

cyran: Kuja im sorry for putting my dick your mouth while you were sleeping and taking those polaroids and sending them to that web site for cash Waaaaaaah

Kuja: YOu what?

Nitram: (Pulls out hatchet) You know we don;t have to let the gnomes get him...

Kawaii Tevar: Kawaiis never die! In this mode I shall be invincible!

(Authors starts drawing a halo over Kawaii Tevar's head)

Tevar: Shit! Screw that!

*The Command Center*

Frank Hipper: Well RedImperator, you have any contingencies for this sort of thing?

RedImperator: We've preserved the Chronicles and sent them to the highguard. But thats all we can do, if it helps, our non combatants are being given sidearms and will fight to the end.

Verilon: I'll be joining our forces at the front, we cannot count on the highguard for anything, but what we can do is fight. what about those Mess guys.

Robert Treder: They alreayd left as soon as Gnomish forces were sighted. They're awaiting the outcome of this battle to determine wether or not they're going to have to take this to their governments. They wante to stay but their obligations to their nations came first.

Frank Hipper: Of course...well then..(Pulls a Tommy gun out) Got any better ideas Sensei Treder?

Robert Treder: They day is not yet over, yet you act like its already tomorrow.

Stravo: He's right. I don't believe in the no win situation.

Robert Treder: When a conflict arises of this nature, there will always be an opportunity for the underdog to win. The key to victory both sides lies in wether or not the Underdog is capable of exploiting that opportunity.

Verilon: Riiiiight, well listen I don't believe that some miracle out of the sky is going to wipe out those Gnomes for us.

*Incredibly, large light in the sky erupts, an immense flat but wide shockwave of psychic energy shreds through the gnomish aircraft A shower of debris crashes towards the ground but one of them is trailing a weird form of light behind it.*

Kuja: Did you see that?

Nitram: That was awesome!

Cyran: Umm guys, will you let me go now? Looks like we might live...please dont kill me and cut off my nuts? Guys?

DEnryle: (via walkie talkie) Get down here now! We need to counterattack now!

Kuja: Minister! What in the hell was that?

Denryle: Im unsure, but I have a crazy guess.

*Cut back to the sisterhood*

Duchess: Niiiiice, now that just leaves about a zillion ground troops (hefts Bazooka) Lets make 'em pay.

Innerbrat: I've never seen anything like that...except for...

Zaia: No way in hell.

Verilon: No time for Disbelief (bares fangs) Someone bring the glasses, were having bloody marys tonight.

* The counterattack of the usergroups met with fierces resistence as the blind rage on both sides and the confusion caused by Fanboys Shockwave led both sides to forget military doctine. It was now hundreds of small melee battles erupting all over the city. The Gnomish forces had lost their momentum, sudenly, the HAB Fighters roared into the sky, but now they were faced with no aerial opposition and acted with impunity upon Gnomish units away from the front. Cries of pain and death could be heard from the front lines. More redshirt gnome soldiers rushed to the front and trampled their own in the process. It was safer to be in the fighting up front, than to be a sitting duck away from the battle.*

JodoForce: What in the seven gnomish hells? Wehad this battle won! What in the hell was that they used on our aerial forces.

Fanboy: Psychic Shockwave, your standard manipulation of mental energy with a materialzied charge that ...

JodoForce: Spare me the technobabble human..

Fanboy: wEll you did ask, and I figured it was a reasonable last request.

JodoForce: Do what now?

Fanboy: You're dead.

*Fanboy threw his boat oar like a spear, the oar was thrown with immense force and it burst JodoForce's head like a Gallagher Melon, using tleekinesis Fanboy retireved the oar and charged towards scattered gnomish rear forces. Slaughtering them mercilessly in their small groups. Menawhile the Mages, in attempt to flank the forces on the ground themselves have found themselves faced with a chargin column of Gnomish soldiers.*

Kuja: Guys, triple hadoken! Tevar, We need a Mighty Guard Spell!

HAAAAAAAAAAAAA-DOOOOOOOOOOOOO-KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

*The Huge Blast Tore trhough the city streets and the gnomesburned into small piles of ash. The three mages stopped to admire their handiwork for a quick second.*

Kuja: Nee Haw! that's the biggest Hadoken Ever!

Cyran: (Victory Dance) Choke on the Waste and Enjoy the Taste Gnomes!

Nitram: (grabs crotch, moonwalks) WOOOOOOOO!

*The three mages then hear someone coughing and making their way towards them, forcing his way through the rubble*

Fanboy: Jeez,next time send up a flare or something will you?

Kuja: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH

Cyran: A GHOST! RUN AWAY!!!!

Nitram: You iddiots, its Fanboy! He's alive!

Kuja: Oh, AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH hes back from the dead to kill us!

Cyran: I dont hink thats what he meant

Fanboy: Listen, if you screwballs are done victory groping each other perhaps we could go finish this battle?

*The combined attacks of Fanboy, and the untouched HAB Aerial Corps eliminated the Gnomes numerical superiority. The gnomes were soon islated into small pockets of marauders throughout the city, and they were hunted down one by one by the BlakcMages and GALE Force Special Ops.*

lord Pounder: Commander Hipper. No more gnomes can be detected in the city, most of them have retreated into new Jersey and have fled into underground tunnels.

Frank Hipper: Excellent news. well Treder, it seems that your prohecy has come to pass.

Robert Treder: A Blind eye still hears the truth.

Frank Hipper: I don't get it.

Robert Treder: Widom is not about how much you know, but about how much you know about what you do know.

Frank Hipper: Shut up..just,stop okay?

Robert Treder: *Karate Kicks Frank in the jaw* Mess with Master, Major disaster.

Frank hipper: Mess with Frank and he kills you! (draws pistol)

Verilon: Easy Frank, we won...how im still not sure, that guy cant possibly have that kind of ability can he?

Denryle: He just did, so he must. At any rates I believe its time to recouperate and reorganize. The black mages will stay in touch but we have to hit the gnomes hard now before they can recover.

Sea Skimmer: Bah! I told you our Aerials forces would win the day! That fighter..

RedImperator: If it wasn't for him your fighters would not have enjoyed that kind of success. Face it, we need that strength on our side.

Verilon: Agreed.

Yankee Stadium, Upper decks, where Fanboy has gone to meditate.

Zaia: Its quiet up here when there isn't a game going on.

Fanboy: Yup

Zaia: (sits next to him) That was, amazing what you did out there. I...I just want to...thank you.

--
(Duchess:) what are they saying!

(Nitram:) I can't tell, be quiet!

(Innerbrat:) Who's touching my bum?

(Cyran:) Wasn't me *gets slapped) Ow!

(Tevar): ShhHHH!!!!1

(Kuja:) (Im gonna pich Innerbrat again so that she hits Cyran again, bwahaha)

--

Fanboy: It was nothing, really, Im just doing what I have to do thats all.

Zaia: Ok...

Fanboy: I think its time to go again.

Zaia: but where? Youve only been back with us for so long, we need your strength.

Fanboy: Im not going to stop fighting, but I have to cut this threat off at the head once and for all. I need to go out inot the world and get more information.

Zaia: The SIsterhood will take you wherever...

Fanboy: no...I have to do this alone, and you have to keep doing your job.

Zaia: Will I ever see you again?

Fanboy: (smirks) Depends on how much longer I can go without getting killed. Now would you kindly tell your freinds in the rows up behind us to quit spying on us?

Zaia: WhAt?

(Kuja): Busted!

(Innerbrat): Damnit! (Hits Cyran)

Cyran: OW! (goes rolling downt he cement steps in the aisle. His Walkie talkie kicks in..

Denryle: (Via walkie talkie) Cyran, is fanboy there? Let me talk to him...

Fanboy: This is him...

Denryle: Listen, we need you to join us at Castle Blackmage, we need your help for our upcoming assignment.

Fanboy: Sorry chief, but i've got to...

Denryle: If you need information about the gnomes then I think you'll be interested to know that there is a group of people you'll be interested in meeting. The highguard Has all the infromation we'll need to defeat the Gnomes. however they have a powerful Guardian, Lord Poe, that no one can get through into their realm.

Fanboy: And these highguard people have all the knowledge we need?

Denryle: Correct. This sisterhood will be joining us as well to Augment our forces per Zaia's request. these are dark days and the gnomes will be at our throats soon once again.

Fanboy: Fine, as long as were working the same objectives thats fine with me.

Denryle: Oh and one other thing, a BoTM scientist named Typhonis has picked up your car from the Disneyland Parking lot.

Fanboy: The hell?

Denryle: YOur car is here at the black mage castle, refurbished and armed to the teeth.

Fanboy: Shizzzzzzzzzzzzz. Okay, tosses (Walkie Talkie up at Kuja, whom he nails square in the face. ) Awright spy geeks, take me to the castle at once so I can find out what they did to my car. Oh, and Z.

Zaia:....

Fanboy: Looks like we're going to be partners after all, howabout we quit feeling awkward about that last conversation and go play some Underpants Foosball?

Zaia: Okay, put, how to you play?

Fanboy: Well you just reach down my...

Zaia: never mind, I'll pass on that, but you can carry me over to castle blackmage and earn soem brownie points.

Fanboy: Story of my life!


Gnome Plae


Darth Garden Gnome: (sobs) WAaaaaAAHAAHhhhhhhh!

Rogue Ice: My lord, i know this episode wasn't all that funny or well written, but there will be more, the author can improve!

Darth Garden Gnome: Its not that, its JodoForce, he's dead....

rogue Ice: You mean you actually are crying for him?

DGG: hes the only one of you odiots that ever succeeded! You know how hard it is to find good henchmen these days? *Sigh*

END

[Darth Fanboy]

You know that you portray all of us almost flawlessly right?

Not quite... I still don't know where everyone gets the idea that I'm insanely jealous...

Its not jealously, its more "vengeful"

EDITL

Just a note that all typoes are a result of translating the gnome language.

[Captain Cyran]

Cyran: (Victory Dance) Choke on the Waste and Enjoy the Taste Gnomes!

Heh. Good chapter Fanboy, didn't feel like descirbing the slaughter eh? Oh well. Needs more funny, less story...

[Darth Fanboy]

Cyran: (Victory Dance) Choke on the Waste and Enjoy the Taste Gnomes!

Heh. Good chapter Fanboy, didn't feel like descirbing the slaughter eh? Oh well. Needs more funny, less story...

Im saving that for Behind the Magic

[Zaia]

Underpants Foosball? Smooth.....very smooth....

[Darth Fanboy]

Underpants Foosball? Smooth.....very smooth....

I was watching one of those deodorant commercials with the Foosball table at the time. You wouldbe surprised at how muhc of this particualr story is influence by whatever comercial I was istening to at the time.

THat plus I wouldnt mind being pulled on and twisted around like that every once in a while.

[haas mark]

Verilon: No time for Disbelief (bares fangs) Someone bring the glasses, were having bloody marys tonight.

:luv::twisted:

~ver

[Darth Fanboy]

Okay, I was cheap on writing the slaughter. And I shouldnt cop out on my fans who cant acces GNOME HUntER: Behind the Magic

so I now have THe first in a line of GNOME HUNTER e-trading cards!

The first E-trading card will be Mlack Mage Cyran!

you can find it in the AnP forum

[Rye]

Heheehe, you should fit in somewhere a reference to the "Mortal wombat" the civil war of the gnomes that we had in secret a while ago.

[Darth Fanboy]

Heheehe, you should fit in somewhere a reference to the "Mortal wombat" the civil war of the gnomes that we had in secret a while ago.

If you had it in secret, how would I know about it?

[Alyrium Denryle]

I am itching to see a bit more action...

[Agent Fisher]

you stil haven't answered me, Fanboy. Why would the gnomes want to kill me.

[Mitth`raw`nuruodo]

Heheehe, you should fit in somewhere a reference to the "Mortal wombat" the civil war of the gnomes that we had in secret a while ago.

If you had it in secret, how would I know about it?

It was moved into G&C when the Gnomish Forum was deleted, IIRC. OH wait, that was the other one. WHY DID NOONE MOVE THE WOMBAT WAR! Well, the Gnomish SSTGOD is located here, if you want to put in a reference to that.

[Zaia]

so I now have THe first in a line of GNOME HUNTER e-trading cards!

Sweet! Can mine have my current avatar on it?

[Darth Fanboy]

so I now have THe first in a line of GNOME HUNTER e-trading cards!

Sweet! Can mine have my current avatar on it?

Its all a matter of wether my poor widdle heart can handle the stimulus.

[Beowulf]

Only thing is that you forgot the HAB space forces...

[Darth Fanboy]

Only thing is that you forgot the HAB space forces...

Nah, sticking to modern tech with just a hint of Fantasy/Magic

[Typhonis 1]

so I now have THe first in a line of GNOME HUNTER e-trading cards!

Sweet! Can mine have my current avatar on it?

I`d buy that for a dollar

[Darth Fanboy]

GNOME HUNTER EPISODE SIX: tHe iroN CHEf Episode! Part One!

Announcer: It was nearly Five Episodes ago that one mans dreams and free times, finally culminated into the REality that is GNOME HUNTER. Users from all over the forum gathered to read this epic saga about the Second War of Gnomish Succession. But now the excitement for the fic is subsiding and the author has decided to go in an entirely new direction. By ripping off the premise of the popular Japanese Teleivion Show IRON CHEF!


Chairman Fanboy: If memory serves me correctly there is but one gnomish chef in the entire galaxy that has mastered a cuisine that is edible to humans. His name is Miththrawnnuruodo, Mith for short. After several failed attempts at operationg his own restauraunt he fianly found work in a Truck Stop Diner outside of Omaha, after years of perfecting his technique, we was hired as the head chef of a local Denny's, his mastery of the grand slam breakfast has allowed him to rise trhough the ranks, and his dreams of one day franchising his own international House of Pancakes comes closer with each passing day.

Mith: The key is to make the food delicious, otherwise, the patrons will not want to eat that. And I assure you there is nothing scarier thana patron whose bacon you have burned.

Announcer/Verilon: Greetings Everyone My name is Verilon, announcing with me as always is food expert Rob Dalton

Dalton: A pleasure as always...

Verilon: And with us tonight, one of the guest tasters and helping us up here in the booth, Stravo!

Stravo: good to be here Ver...

Verilon: And now lets go down to the Challenger

Fanboy: bring Forth! the Challenger!

Verilon: ANd here comes the Challenger, from the Gnomish School , here is Mith! Accompanied by his diminuitive grand master Darth Garden Gnome!

Fanboy; Welcome, to my Kitchen Arena, Mith, Master Gnome.

DGG: It is a pleasure (Mith bows)

Fanboy: I hope it has not been, a difficult trip.

DGG: Well, side from the occaisional Explosion, it was pleasant.

Fanboy: Very good, now Mith, I know your experience will allow you to challenge any opponent. But you only need to select one. Bring forth, The SDneT IRON CHEFS!!!!!!


Verilon: And here they are! Your three Iron Chefs!

Iron Chef Black Mage, Kuja!

(Kuja Emerges, holding a large Hammer)

Iron Chef Society of Sister ZAIA!

(Zaia Emerges holding a shotgun)

Iron Chef Heavy Armor Brigade MKSheppard!

(Shep Emerges in a German Tank, Dressed as Rommel)

Here they are your three Iron chefs!

*Lots of applause, women throw Panties at Fanboy, more cheers and bare breasts*

Fanboy: Make your selection

Mith: Kuja.....

Verilon: And today's Iron Chef will be Iron Chef Black Mage! Kuja began his apprenticeship while busing tables at Olive Garden, and later on Red Lobster, before forsaking that career into a more promising future as a Black Mage. Using his powers in the dark arts, he has learned to adapt them for the purposes of preparing food to shove down his non visible throat hole. Now he earns a subsistence wage preparing food at the Black mage Castle for important guests.

Fanboy: Gnomes...and Black Mages..two enemies battling since before the dawn of time. On this day, all of those rivalries and all of those feelings of hatred collide here, in the Kitchen Arena.

I know most of our audience, is familiar with low budgets for meals, and an appreciation for food prepared quickly with little effort. Todays theme ingredient reflects this. Todays THEME INGREDIENT IS........

*Unveils a large cloth, a large table with stacks of various brands of RAMEN NOODLES, is unveiled*

Fanboy: RAMEN NOOOOODLES!

Verilon: Ramen noodles! Staple in the diets of college students all over the United States and tonghts theme ingredient.

ESnO: Verilon!

Verilon: On the floor EInhander Snoman, Einhander some news already?

ESnO: Yes, I heard that tonights theme ingredient was actually changed at the last second, originally it was going to be Donuts but they all nysteriously disappeared and Ramen noodles were the best ingredient that the producers could come up with at the last minute!

Verilon: Thank you Einy, well what do you think guys Mysteriously Disappearing donuts?

Dalton: No Comment.

Stravo: (Laughs ass off)

Dalton: (Punches Stravo in the mouth and laughs ass off)

Verilon: Join us after the commerical break for GNOMER HUNTER EPISODE SIX, PART TWO, Battle RAMEN!


To be continued! After these messages!

[haas mark]

Ramen noodles. I kill you now.

[EDIT] BTW, was funny as hell, still. Only nitpick: Mith is actually Mitth.

~ver

[Mitth`raw`nuruodo]

Great fun. Especially since I'm a horrible cook...

And yeah, it's Mitth`raw`nuruodo, or Mitth.

[JodoForce]

Looks like I've been neglecting my duties at GNOMICON... or, looks like nobody told me about this!

Can someone sum up what we're doing now?

[Captain Cyran]

Kick his ass Kuja! Woot woot woot!!

[Kuja]

*grabs a staggeringly large array of kitchen knives and begins sharpening them*


Hehehehehehehe.......