Worst fanfic you've seen?

[CaptainChewbacca]

From SDN, Oni created the ultimate liberal fanwank timeline that's like a leftist probability broach. That's the only really horrible one I can remember.

[Night_stalker]

my immortal. Bennet's reading of it was more then enough. Never have I experienced such soul crushing awfulness

Who is Bennet, what is "my immortal?"

Cliff notes please because I value my braincells.

YOU DONT WANT TO KNOW. that's all I am going to say.

[Samuel]

Just use tv tropes to look it up.

[d'Artagnan]

my immortal. Bennet's reading of it was more then enough. Never have I experienced such soul crushing awfulness

Who is Bennet, what is "my immortal?"

Cliff notes please because I value my braincells.

Imagine the most horribly caricatured "gothic" (or "goffick" as the author often spells it, but we'll get to that later) people possible. These people wear clothing what appears to be the bastard offspring of Victorian dresses and Hot Topic and wear horrific amounts make-up. Even the men, if memory serves. They love My Chemical Romance, Good Charlotte, Evanescence (the title of the story is stolen from one of their songs) and such and want to have Gerald Way's vampire children or something.

Now, attempt to shoehorn the existing characters from the Harry Potter series into these moronic stereotypes. You will fail, not that fact stopped the author. Harry has been renamed "Vampire," Ron "Diabolo" and Draco "Dracola," which sounds like Bram Stoker's attempt to break into the soft drink industry. The author's crowning achievement in mutilating the characters, though, is her inclusion of an obvious self insert named "Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way." Yes, her middle(ish) name is a degenerative brain condition. Ebony (or Enoby, as it is often spelled), is a ravishingly beautiful seventh year Slytherin who is in love with Vampire and Dracola alternately. It should be noted that Vampire and Dracola are in love with each other, too, as they've been turned into bisexual vampires. These three, along with the disfigured corpses of the other Harry Potter characters, do "goffick" things like slit their wrists and play in their band, Bloody Gothic Rose 666.

As you can probably tell, the author has little to no respect for the English language and rarely uses a spellchecker. When she does, it often completely changes the word. This leads to hilarity, such as the main characters being devoted "Stanists" or "Statinists," criminals being sent to the dreaded prison fortress of Azerbaijan, and the word "masturbating" turning into "masticating." That last one is an important point regarding Professors "Loopin" and "Snap" and their voyeuristic habits.

The Tv Tropes article has links to the full text and various dramatic readings are available on YouTube, with my personal favorites being those done by HellfireComms.

[Ritterin Sophia]

From SDN, Oni created the ultimate liberal fanwank timeline that's like a leftist probability broach. That's the only really horrible one I can remember.

New United States of Christiania? What?!

[Night_stalker]

There are somethings that aren't meant to be seen by anyone. That and My Immortal are both examples.

[Nematocyst]

What shocks me the most about My Immortal is that it is still under debate if the author (Tara Gilesbie) was a troll or not.
I mean, seriously. Imagine if it wasn't a troll, if she's everything she says she is.

The very thought scares me.

But Agony in Pink is an entirely new thing. I read that when it was mentioned in this thread. I wish I didn't...

[Spekio]

What shocks me the most about My Immortal is that it is still under debate if the author (Tara Gilesbie) was a troll or not.
I mean, seriously. Imagine if it wasn't a troll, if she's everything she says she is.

The very thought scares me.

But Agony in Pink is an entirely new thing. I read that when it was mentioned in this thread. I wish I didn't...

Why did you do that? You poor bastard. If you need incentive to kill yourself, try reading Sonichu. It makes My Immortal pale in comparisson.

My Immortal is obviously a troll fic. I mean, it has to be, right?

[Agent Fisher]

God, my immortal? I listened to like ten words of a dramatic reading of one of the chapters and I just had to stop. It made me WANT to slice my own wrists.

[Night_stalker]

Hey, it could be worse. No, scratch that. It CAN'T get any more worse than My Immortal.

[Spekio]

Hey, it could be worse. No, scratch that. It CAN'T get any more worse than My Immortal.

Sonichu
There is Artemis' Lover. There is Agony In Pink. There is The Girl Who Lived. There is My Immortal. There is My Inner Life. Many demonstrations could be made for the ascendent terribleness of such works, putting them above all lesser bad fanworks.

But then, standing resplendent above them all, there is Sonichu.

You are forcing me to do it.
Edit: Also from TVTropes:
So Bad Its Horrible: My Immortal has a sort of grandeur to it, since it has been (possibly) carefully constructed to be as terrible as possible. This is no parody. This is a man's life - his failures, his neuroses, his fantasies, his warped worldview, proudly displayed for the world on paper and pixels. Reading Sonichu and learning about its author is nothing less than a descent into someone's personal hell, made all the more terrible for the fact that the author intends for the experience to entertain people. That they would purchase it. There is no joy, no fun in CWCville - there is only layer upon layer of horror.

[Sinewmire]

My Immortal is obviously a troll fic. I mean, it has to be, right?

Please. Please make it be. PLEASE.

*collapses in tears*

[Night_stalker]

Hey, we ALL hope it is a troll fic. I am terrified to think about the alternatives.

[JGregory32]

Your approaching "Agony in Pink" the wrong way. It's not a fanfic, it's snuff porn that includes popular characters from Power Rangers.

It's like watching the torture scenes from Hostel, there's no plot, no story, and no characters.

Kinda reminds me of another story, Star Wars torture porn starring Princess Leia, called Leia's Ordeal by Paul Corsair
Unreadable, does terrible thing to well liked character, and the author has no idea of female anatomy.
Seems only available on ASSTR under the collection of "The AM/TV Archive: The Old Archive" under the star wars category.

[Nematocyst]

Why did you do that? You poor bastard. If you need incentive to kill yourself, try reading Sonichu. It makes My Immortal pale in comparisson.

Well, having the best fanfic ever a few threads up (or down), rare logic dictates that I should also read the worst.

But then, standing resplendent above them all, there is Sonichu.

CWC has a mental condition (I think it was autism), so he gets reasonable doubt.
Tara Gilesbie doesn't.

[Spekio]

Tara might be a troll, but not much is known about her. CWC, on the other hand is... peverse. If he is a troll(one can dream) then he is God Troll. Seriously... the disregard for common sense, little disturbing details, the constant ripoffs, those mindwarping racism/homphobia displays. Ungh. And the Sex scenes.
Sonichu is the closest thing to the Necronomicon that actually exists. Spoiler

CWC

[Ugolino]

I have to disagree. For Lovecraft's characters, the Necronomicon has some useful information and is evidently interesting reading.

Sonichu doesn't fit either.

[adam_grif]

How can we have come this far without the ultimate in horrible short-stories?

Doom: Repercussions of Evil

By Peter Chimaera

John Stalvern waited. The lights above him blinked and sparked out of the air. There were demons in the base. He didn't see them, but had expected them now for years. His warnings to Cernel Joson were not listenend to and now it was too late. Far too late for now, anyway.
John was a space marine for fourteen years. When he was young he watched the spaceships and he said to dad "I want to be on the ships daddy."
Dad said "No! You will BE KILL BY DEMONS"
There was a time when he believed him. Then as he got oldered he stopped. But now in the space station base of the UAC he knew there were demons.
"This is Joson" the radio crackered. "You must fight the demons!"
So John gotted his palsma rifle and blew up the wall.
"HE GOING TO KILL US" said the demons
"I will shoot at him" said the cyberdemon and he fired the rocket missiles. John plasmaed at him and tried to blew him up. But then the ceiling fell and they were trapped and not able to kill.
"No! I must kill the demons" he shouted
The radio said "No, John. You are the demons"
And then John was a zombie.

[Srelex]

Where's that from? Like a lot of bad fanfics, looks like the work of either a troll or a seven-year old.

[adam_grif]

Where's that from? Like a lot of bad fanfics, looks like the work of either a troll or a seven-year old.

His FF profile can be found here, but he took Doom down from it apparently. I seem to recall the kid being like 12 or something, but I can't remember where I heard that. His profile was set up in '02. IIRC, he originally was that terrible, but his work hit meme status and people started demanding more for the hilarity factor, so he now deliberately writes like that, eight years later.

Although he may well have been a troll the whole time.

He now has an official website, and sells dead tree copies of his work.

[Nematocyst]

That's so bad it goes all the way back to good.
A really bad fanfic is so bad you'll want to gouge your eyes, and Repercussions of Evil doesn't cause that effect

[Ugolino]

According to TV tropes, the writer confessed to being a troll. Not surprising.

Oh, and someone rewrote the Doom fic to be a proper fic:

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4067416/1/D ... il_Mark_II

[Ruadhan2300]

reminds me of the John Freeman series of HL2 Machinimas. apparently they were born of a fanfic someone posted somewhere. and this utter genius of a guy went and made a series of short videos, narrated by reading the story. spelling and grammar mistakes included.
heres the first one, enjoy it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHxyZaZl ... re=related

[Majin Gojira]

I just want to know where the stock music used within comes from. It's been used everywhere and I just want to know where the FRACK it can be found.

[Samuel]

How about published works that aren't fanfiction? I just finished Star Corps by Ian Douglas and its pretty bad- like if Oni hadn't been stopped. How far down do you have to go before it becomes the worst?