Worst fanfic you've seen?

[Srelex]

I know there's already been similar threads, but they're years old, and in that time I'm sure plenty of new horrible fanfics have cropped up. So, what's the worst fanfic you've seen, or the most obnoxious one? I vaguely remember once seeing a Halo/SW crossover fic that had, ugh, Elites taking down AT-ATs with energy swords. And of course there's things like My Immortal, but they're too obvious. So, what's the lowest parts of the barrel you've witnesses?

[Sarevok]

Graham Kennedys Portal remains a classic. Few has surpassed the extreme depths achieved therein.

[Darth Yan]

my immortal. Bennet's reading of it was more then enough. Never have I experienced such soul crushing awfulness

[[R_H]]

I try not to remember them. There's a lot of awful fanfics on Fanfiction.net (for example). The short ones especially.

[SapphireFox]

Lets see worst fanfic ever...hmm. I would have to say the Marrissa Picard series by Stephen Ratliff. It's arguably the worst case of Mary Sue I have ever encountered. That is saying something considering the amount of fanfiction I read on a regular basis. The sheer improbability of the actions of the people in the fic are staggering. For example why would you leave the saucer section of the enterprise in the command of a little girl Worf's son Alexander and a bunch of other kids? How without real training are they able to constantly pwn Gul Dukat while he is using a top of the line Galor class ship with only the saucer section? It's been a few years since I have read any of Ratliff's works so I may be blocking out worse memories of stupid from the Marissa Picard Trekverse.

If you want to see how bad it is for yourself and are feeling either masochistic enough to suffer through it or are feeling more courageous than a space marine willing to push through the worst of chaos then here is a link to an archive of the works in question.
http://trekiverse.us/stephen/works/index.html

[Night_stalker]

On FF.net I have had the misfortune to find 2 supremely irredempable ones.

1. halo teh dstructin of te wrold part 1.

2. forgot nam of stroy. yes that is the actual title, and it only goes down hill from there.

[Nematocyst]

my immortal. Bennet's reading of it was more then enough. Never have I experienced such soul crushing awfulness

I agree with this. And so does Google.

[Kuroji]

I know it's too obvious, but yeah, My Immortal. It's hard to quantify just how terrible it is... I think I've blocked it out after someone gave me the link and went 'zomg, read this, it'll make your brain bleed'. I don't even remember what it's about anymore but every time I see that phrase, I get an impending sense of dread.

[White Haven]

I think 'Kwisatz Jedi God' right here at SDN has to take the cake.

[General Soontir Fel]

The Heritage. A "Harry Potter" fic about Harry getting a gigantic harem, including pre-pubescent girls. I "sporked" (took it apart line by line using a "canon characters read the fic" trope) several chapters on deleterius until I got tired of it. If want to read those, the links to each chapter can be found here. According to some commenters, reading the fic without the intermittent sporking is impossible.

[Spekio]

Oh boy.... Sonichu

If you don't believe it's fanficiton, since the "Creator" believes it's real...
Agony in Pink. Just... Agony In Pink .

[Zor]

I must third My Immortal as being the most godawful fanfic ever.

Zor

[phred]

I gotta second 'Agony in Pink'. Then again I don't read much fanfic, so it wins by default of being horrible enough for me to remember

[The Duchess of Zeon]

Artemis' Lover.

[Setesh]

See most of these examples are bad from the first sentence and really that's not as bad as one that starts out not so bad and degenerates.

The Journeyverse comes to mind. It started off as Xander: badass normal, and quietly slipped into Xanderstu ridiculous. It has some good concepts but they tend to get woven into the story in absurd ways to make Xander the permanent jack of all trades 'hero' of the story. (several of the events, such as fighting off a goa'uld mothership he simultaneously learns to pilot 'Ancient' space fighters while retraining a bunch of real pilots to fly them. In a week or two., would have been less ridiculous if he had stayed on the ground and just acted as C&C. But no Xander has to be the HERO of each story.) By the end of the third arc, Xander can ignore the rewriting of the timeline itself. And oh btw Xander founded starfleet.

Or Repossessed which starts with Xander gaining the memories of Methos (from highlander) and using Methos' practicality and skills to hunt vampires and demons, but degenerates quickly after he finds the whip of Belmont (castlevania), who he is apparently descended from, to time traveling with Seras Victoria (Hellsing) to help Goblins found Gringotts, to rescuing Harry Potter to make him into a god-like techno-mage(B5) saiyjin(Dragonball Z). Then it gets really silly.

[Eleas]

See most of these examples are bad from the first sentence and really that's not as bad as one that starts out not so bad and degenerates.

The Journeyverse comes to mind. It started off as Xander: badass normal, and quietly slipped into Xanderstu ridiculous. It has some good concepts but they tend to get woven into the story in absurd ways to make Xander the permanent jack of all trades 'hero' of the story. (several of the events, such as fighting off a goa'uld mothership he simultaneously learns to pilot 'Ancient' space fighters while retraining a bunch of real pilots to fly them. In a week or two., would have been less ridiculous if he had stayed on the ground and just acted as C&C. But no Xander has to be the HERO of each story.) By the end of the third arc, Xander can ignore the rewriting of the timeline itself. And oh btw Xander founded starfleet.

I have to second this with some prejudice. On a related note, I once got into discussion with Tenhawk on the subject of Buffy and specifically the canonical abilities of Buffyverse vampires. One short evening later, Tenhawk had demonstrated a laundry list of fan-retard characteristics: strawmen, non-sequiturs, lying about his own words, false dilemmas, double standards, and tailoring evidence to suit his preferred conclusions. All the while, of course, insisting that he was merely "first among equals" on a mailing list founded by himself, moderated by himself, revolving around his own stories, and violently opposed to any outside phenomenon.

[Majin Gojira]

I'm glad I'm not alone in my assessment of Tenhawk's stu-laden travesty.

Hell, I read several of those shitty things years ago and I'm still bitter at the arguments I had with the guy, and he's pretty much as you describe him.

The semi-related "Wanderer-verse" is in the same boat, only written in an even worse style (and given you can find chatspeak every now and then in the original "Journeys", that's saying something).

[Ritterin Sophia]

Hard Contact, Triple Zero, True Colors, Order 66, 501st, Bloodlines, Sacrifice, and Revelations.

[Night_stalker]

I resent the Republic Commando series being on that list.

[Ritterin Sophia]

I resent the Republic Commando series being on that list.

And I should care why?

[EarthScorpion]

There was a post-Third Impact Ghost In The Shell/Evangelion crossover I stumbled across a while ago, which... well had a special kind of bad. It wasn't especially poorly written; it was just terribly thought out. Quite apart from the fact that somehow the entire Angelic incursions were passed off as GitS WW3 (which...just doesn't work at all), there was the fact that the entire story was written from such a Rei-philliac Shinji/Asuka-hating perspective that it warped the characters to make them unrecognisable, quite apart from a rather silly plot line.

And the "twist" at the end that Aramaki was part of SEELE was just... bleargh.

[Night_stalker]

I resent the Republic Commando series being on that list.

And I should care why?

Compared to some of the SW novels out there, they're not half bad. Call it a guilty pleasure, but I like reading them. She actually gives the RCs a face, other than Delta and follows some common sense military tactics, and offers a nice view point on the Clone Wars.

[Srelex]

I resent the Republic Commando series being on that list.

And I should care why?

Compared to some of the SW novels out there, they're not half bad. Call it a guilty pleasure, but I like reading them. She actually gives the RCs a face, other than Delta and follows some common sense military tactics, and offers a nice view point on the Clone Wars.

Well, I guess you're better at being able to stomach the Mando horseshit and the fucked-up ideas (100,000 droids! Jango knew about Order 66!) than other people.

[Thanas]

my immortal. Bennet's reading of it was more then enough. Never have I experienced such soul crushing awfulness

Who is Bennet, what is "my immortal?"

Cliff notes please because I value my braincells.

[Darth Yan]

bennet the sage is a web reviewer on a comedy site called ask that guy with the glasses, my immortal is a harry potter fic considered by many to be the worst fic of all time. He reads it out in detail; When he did so I felt worse then I did after Ultraviolet. I felt dead inside it was so bad.