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ST Vs SW fanfic pleas R&R

Posted: 2003-05-03 01:50pm
by darthdavid
The Enterprise lanced through space at high warp suddenly a violent lurching sensation acompanied by the dimming of lights threw most of the crew out of chairs and off feet. The stars reeling out of their veiw ports showed them that they were no longer at warp.

"What in hell just happend?" said Picard struggling to his feet.

"I belive that we were in the immeadiate vicinity of a wormhole during it's formation, the subsequent burst of subspace energy must of colapsed our warp feild."

As if to mark his point the main veiwer crackled to life as the ship rotated to face the tell tale blue disk in space.
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5 hours later

Sitting around the table in the breifing room of the enterprise were all the senior staff.

"Data can you tell me your findings on this worm hole?" Picard said.

"It appears to be stable however..." Data was cut off by the blaring of a klaxon, a grew point emerged from the worm hole and kept going for ever or so it seemed to the stunned bridge officers and the main veiwer was patched into the conference rooms tv screen"

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On board the stadestroyer Besurk Fury

Captin, I just don't know what happend, we were flying smoothley and suddenly we're in a worm hole that's practically tearing the shi...nevermind now captin, were about the exit the worm hole!"

The massive bulk of the great grey arrow head appeared in front of the comparitivly dimminuative enterprise.

End of chapter one.

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Suggestions? Crap? Good? Mistakes this early on? Please respond.

Posted: 2003-05-03 01:59pm
by Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot
Well, this could be interesting.

Just don't go down the 'Portal' route (check GAT's deconstruction of it for why).

Posted: 2003-05-03 11:13pm
by Darth Fanboy
DON'T write anything else until you learn how to spell for fuck's sake.