Our Story - The Spiran Adventure

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Steve
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Our Story - The Spiran Adventure

Post by Steve »

I went ahead and finished the First Arc of "Our Story" tonight, in a marathon writing event, and now it's here for you to download.

Why did I rush it like this instead of putting it in parts like originally planned? Oh, trust me, the reason is very.... good. :twisted: Those in the know are hereby asked to keep it to themselves. :D

http://stgjr.racknine.net/misc/os-spira.doc

Well, here it is. Criticisms are welcome if constructive.
”A Radical is a man with both feet planted firmly in the air.” – Franklin Delano Roosevelt

"No folly is more costly than the folly of intolerant idealism." - Sir Winston L. S. Churchill, Princips Britannia

American Conservatism is about the exercise of personal responsibility without state interference in the lives of the citizenry..... unless, of course, it involves using the bludgeon of state power to suppress things Conservatives do not like.

DONALD J. TRUMP IS A SEDITIOUS TRAITOR AND MUST BE IMPEACHED
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phongn
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Post by phongn »

Pretty good, but rather short, I think. The ending was kinda fast; climax and conclusion were shoved together. The characters also seemed to grow into their powers far too quickly; maybe a longer journey would have worked better.

Still, a good story :)
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