StarDestroyer.Net BBS

My first serious attempt at making a fic, a fic set in my own universe. Check it out. And I need a decent title.
EDIT: I need help, advice, whatnot. I just started my fic.


SOLDIERS OF THE SOVEREIGNTY

Intro:

The date was April 25, 2345, the planet was Daron, a colony of the United Sovereignty of Earth. The situation was tense; an armed militia group which goes by the name of Gamma-Sigma had taken over Daron a week ago. The Gamma-Sigma claims to be a group of freedom fighters combating the tyranny of the Bragulan Star Empire, a massive totalitarian nation of bear-like humanoids.

Normally, militia which was against the BSE would be supported by Earth, but this group is notorious for its violent actions towards both the BSE and Earth. The USE colony was captured, the unprepared civilian defense forces all killed and the civilians held hostage.

The Sovereignty responded by sending a small task force composed of four destroyers and a light carrier, all of which belonged to the United Sovereignty Marine Corps. The tiny fleet was hiding behind a meteor belt near the planet, avoiding sensors and probes which could warn the Gamma-Sigma. After a week of monitoring Daron’s condition, the fleet had determined that it was the time to take action.

And today, June 25, is D-day.


USE Light Carrier, Iron Fist

“Firstly, a sensor satellite would be shot down, it was the only sensor array the colony possessed, and with it knocked out, the Gamma-Sigma would be blind. Then a trio of Gamma-Sigma light cruisers defending the planet would be engaged, rendering the planet defenseless against attacks from orbit. Lastly, marines would be sent to finish the job, to terminate the forces of the Gamma-Sigma, free the hostages and capture the leaders which are located in Laketown, Daron’s only city,” said Captain Nathaniel Armstrong, the commander in charge of the Iron Fist and the task force. “It’s a perfectly sound plan, we eliminate the primary threats with speed and precision while keeping the collateral damage and the losses to our forces at a minimal.”


“Thank you, Captain Nathaniel. Now listen up, men,” Lt. John Baylor said to his men as he pointed to a holographic representation of Laketown and the areas surrounding it. The important places were highlighted. “Our squad, Baylor squad, along with Nickerson squad will be among the first squads to set foot on Daron. We will destroy a defensive missile battery north east of Laketown to make it easier for our transport craft to land and deploy more troops. We will land 30 miles away from the installation and make our way on hover cycles. After wasting them, dropships will then arrive and deploy more troops and we all make our way into Laketown. Gamma-Sigma’s leaders and hostages are holed in inside the City Hall. Hopefully we can make our way into the City Hall without too much problems.

“From our Intel, we know that Laketown has a light cruiser’s worth of troops defending it. We also know that they are quite well trained; this particular bunch of Gamma-Sigma has recently slaughtered a couple of Bragulan counter terrorist task forces. That might not be much, but it tells us that these buggers have first hand experience. So, don’t underestimate them. So, do you have any questions?”

“Why does it have to be us who has to take down the defense?” asked Pvt. Kevin L. Anderson.

“That’s because we’re damn good and I’m a genius,” replied Baylor, many troops laughed lightly.

“What if we get shot down by the missile battery that we’re supposed to kill?” asked another soldier.

“That’s possible, but it’s not very likely. Firstly, there’s going to be a thunder storm, we’re going to use that as cover. Secondly, we’re going to jam their sensors, and Gamma-Sigma usually uses Bragulan equipment; so, it’s not likely that they’ll get a lock on us. But other dropships might not be so fortunate, since they’ll be landing closer to Laketown. Are there any more questions? None? Okay. This mission won’t be our first of this type, that’s probably why we’re the ones doing this. You guys aren’t rookies, so, I expect all of you to do your job well and I expect all of you to come back alive. No screw ups, okay? Class dismissed.”

The men went out of the briefing room and proceeded to wherever they wished to go. The mission would begin in around an hour, so the men had time to go around and do whatever they wish. Most of the squad, including Lt. Baylor himself, proceeded to the not so spacious and not so clean mess hall.

“Hey, Mark, gimme the usual,” said the lieutenant. Mark was the cook, a chubby guy, pale skin, messy white chef’s clothing which really contrasts to Baylor’s spotless black shirt and pants.

“One cup o’ coffee and two donuts, right? Yeah. BRENT!!! YOU INCOMPETENT TWAT, A CAN OF SLURM AND A HAMBURGER!!!” Mark screamed to his assistant as he went back to his crossword puzzle. “So, your squad is going to be one of the first to touch down, eh? Good luck dude, not that you’ll need it.”

John chuckled, over time his squad has developed quite a reputation. His squad wasn’t the best, but it always came out with no casualties and with hardly any serious injuries, his men always finished their mission, and after the mission, they’d stuff themselves full with food and beer. “Thanks. Oh, and Mark, get a lot of beer since there’s going to be a hell of a party when we come back.”

John got his Slurm and his burger, sat on a steel chair and placed his meal on the table. He opened his Slurm and poured the soft drink into a mug and took a small sip, then he proceeded to munch on his burger. He closed his eyes for a second and savored the juicy beef. Most other ships had very little real meat, often used only during celebrations, most of the time they just used artificial meat. While artificial meat wasn’t that bad, it was nowhere near as good as the real thing, luckily the Iron Fist had a ready supply of beef and pork and sausages, Baylor Squad being officially tasked by Commander Nathaniel to smuggle in the real meat.

A shadow fell over John and he opened his eyes, he turned his head to see the massive commanding figure of Captain Armstrong.

“Sir,” John said, he stood up, gave his officer in charge a salute, sat down and bit off a huge chunk from his burger.

“Don’t stuff yourself too much, lieutenant, you might throw up when the dropship enters Daron’s atmosphere,” the tall, well muscled 35 year old man said. “Oh, and there’s only half an hour before you guys are supposed to suit up and board the d-ships, you better get going.”

“Yes, boss,” replied John, swallowing the last of his burger and gulping down the last of his Slurm. He stood up and excused himself, he went to suit up.



Chapter 1

“Hmmm…. Is it just me or is my jockstrap a little bit itchy?” asked Private First Class Jedd McLooney, his hands trying to scratch his armored groin.

“Maybe it’s just because you don’t wash your cock,” retorted another private, Joshua Cruise as he wore his helmet.

“Can you guys just zip it? It’s already bad enough that I have to deal with your smell, but can you please just not tell us about how unwashed your ding-a-ling is?” snapped a female squadmate.

“Ouch, Carla, that was just painful,” replied Joshua, dramatically putting his hands on his chest, as if his heart was breaking.

“Okay guys, settle down, settle down,” said Lt. John Baylor, entering the dropship, the d-ship was in the docking bay of the Iron Fist and a few of the squad members were already in the ship, suiting up as they wait for the rest of them. Baylor was already in full battle gear, wearing all of his BS-300, except the helmet, which was held by his left hand, his right holding his MBR-40, phased plasma rifle. “Let’s quit bickering and get focused.”

“Sir, yes sir!” Jedd replied, eager to push the issue of his itching groin away.

“Alright, let’s get ready to rumble!” said Sgt. Eric Ryan as he hopped into the ship with his C-28 ‘Deadshot’ Gauss rifle. Following him were more troopers, more marines. It was five minutes before the d-ship was supposed to fly and the transport craft was getting full.

“Is everybody here?” John asked, although he didn’t need to, he knew how many men was in his squad, he knew them like friends, like brothers.

“Yeah!” said a marine, his face hidden by his helmet.

“Yes, chief.”

“Yeah, boss.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Yup.”

“Okay. Pilot, all of Baylor Squad is in the d-ship. How many minutes until take off?” he asked, he could feel the Iron Fist and her escort ships moving into battle. When combat was imminent, it was always tense, the soldiers were always eager, excitement coursed through the air, like electricity.

“Twelve minutes before we’re supposed to depart and head for the planet, the Iron Fist and her escorts will engage the enemy cruisers in eight minutes, right after destroying the sensor sattelite. We’ll go and sneak off into the planet, hopefully we won’t be detected and we’ll use the thunderstorm as cover in our descent into the planet. The other drop ship containing Nickerson squad will also depart with us and follow a very similar course,” the pilot replied coolly as he chewed gum.

“Nickerson will be helping us kill the Bragulan missile battery, right?” asked Jedd.

“Yup,” replied Carla. “They’ll support us.”

“I hope they don’t mess up, last time they covered our backs, one of us got a bullet in his ass,” joked Jedd.

“Don’t worry, Jedd, bullets won’t be able to go into your fat ass!” laughed Joshua, the rest of Baylor Squad followed suit.

“Why you little weed!!!!” Jedd roared in mock anger as he waved a fist at Joshua. “I’m gonna KILL YO-“

“What the hell was that?” asked Carla, everyone became silent as the Iron Fist vibrated slightly.

___

“WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!” yelled Nathaniel from his command chair as the Iron Fist shook again. The small tiny explosions dotting the debris filled space surrounding the boxy warship was displayed on the massive holographic screen in the chaotic bridge, the explosions were small and were being deflected by the ship’s powerful shields. “What the hell was that?”

“Captain, the Gamma-Sigma has set up mines in the debris field, our sensors didn’t detect them, but they seem to be doing insignificant damage to our shields,” replied an ensign who was quickly inputting commands into his computer console.

“Good Lord! Put us in red alert; tell the destroyers what happened, put them in red alert too. All weapon systems online, shields at maximum! Ready all fighters to deploy at any second, ready the dropships,” Nathaniel ordered his men as they all began to sweat. Nathaniel wasn’t only in charge of the Iron Fist; he was in charge of the entire task force. “Surprise has been compromised; the Gamma-Sigma cruisers will be on us in a flash. Clear up the mine field, the area must be safe for the fighters and the d-ships to be deployed. Be ready to launch long ranged missiles to shoot down the sensor satellite as soon as it comes within range.”

“Aye captain,” responded the communications officer as he began to relay orders to the four destroyers escorting the Iron Fist.

“Captain, the enemy trio is coming at us. They are launching fighters and long range missiles,” reported an ensign. “The Iron Fist and her destroyer escorts have eliminated the mine field, fighters are deploying. The sensor satellite is still within range of our missiles, the Iron Fist has launched 4 missiles.”

“Communications, inform the Valiant and the Steadfast to move in and engage the fighters, let them cover us with everything they got. Launch our fighters at the enemy cruisers, arm them with torpedoes. We need them down quick. Let the Fearless and Braveheart launch long range fire at the cruisers. Let our fighters and destroyers concentrate on one destroyer at a time,” hollered Nathaniel. He began pacing around the bridge, anxious, the Gamma-Sigma might be outnumbered, but they have Bragulan cruisers, and Bragulan cruisers had a reputation of being tough and powerful. “Helm, take us down, we need to keep on firing at the cruisers’ underbellies and stay clear of their big guns. Fire torpedoes, particle cannons and long range missiles at the cruisers, remember, one cruiser at a time, concentrate on the nearest one, all of us. Someone get me a clear view of those cruisers, exactly what are they?”

“Sensors indicate that they are FLM-55, Borev class,” replied someone manning the powerful sensors of the Iron Fist.

“Shit, Intel was right. This is going to be one hell of a ride, shit, shit, shit!” Nathaniel yelled as he began cursing.

___

“What’s going on?” shouted John to the d-ship pilot, an attractive blonde who was chewing gum.

“We’ve hit a mine field, the Gamma-Sigma ships have detected us and are engaging us, Nathaniel is pushing our plans ahead, and we might have to depart in any second. Fighters are being scrambled; the task force is going into formation. The Iron Fist has launched long range missiles to knock down the sensor satellite; it shouldn’t be long until it’s down. And then we’re going to be sent to Daron,” replied the pilot.

“B-E-A-utiful, just beautiful,” commented Jedd sardonically as he slapped his forehead.

___

The long range missiles streaked through the void, all four of them. They neared the Gamma-Sigma cruisers and passed them, headed for the satellite which orbited Daron, which was behind the cruisers. The cruisers fired interception missiles, lasers, plasma bolts and particle bolts, determined to turn the missiles into space dust. One missile was clipped by a plasma bolt, it whizzed out of control and a particle bolt blew it into oblivion. Another missile had its tail melted by a laser; it was too damaged to continue flying. The second to the last one was grazed by a laser, its thrusters were damaged. It immediately changed its course, adjusting to the sudden impact, its AI trying to correct its course. It homed in on the satellite, it slammed on a solar panel and detonated, shearing the panel off and deforming one side of the satellite, but it was not good enough, the satellite was still functional. The last missile was almost grazed by a laser, it began evasive maneuvers, and its low grade sensor jammers were being put to the test. A hot whitish-blue plasma bolt streaked by it, a missile exploded very near it, but the missile continued on unscathed. A dissipating laser beam struck its head, not enough to destroy the missile, but enough fry the primary sensors. The missile was flying blind. The AI adjusted its course and began to vector into the suspected coordinates of the satellite. The missile was now a mile away from the satellite, a hundred meters, fifty meters, ten meters, it was now right beside the satellite. The missile’s still functional passive sensors detected the satellite; the AI couldn’t switch its current course for its engines were out of fuel. The AI activated a proximity detonation, exploding near the satellite in hopes of taking it down or doing enough damage to render it inoperative. The satellite was caught in the blast and emerged quite damaged, but its primary systems were still functional, its power was down by 60%, it was still operating within acceptable parameters. It had survived, but the proximity blast had altered the satellite’s orbit. Slowly but surely, the satellite began its descent into Daron, burning up in the planet’s atmosphere.

WOW!

I've waited a long time to see a fic set in your own universe, and it starts off very well.

I have no complaints as far except for maybe a lack of originality, but what I've read yet is nonetheless entertaining and well-written.

One thing which I particular enjoy is that it gives the reader a clear overview over what's going on without being too vague and undetailed.


As for a title, I'm not sure... what about "The Hammer Strikes" ??


BTW - in case you want to know what my sci-fi universe looks like (when you announced help with developing your sci-fi 'verse, my first response was to point out similarities between your 'verse and mine), you can check out the revised version of fic "The Wormhole War" which has recently been updated with a 4th chapter.

(Yep, I know that I have the least shame of all shameless pluggers. But it's the only way I can get people to read my fics)

Peregrin Toker wrote:WOW!

I've waited a long time to see a fic set in your own universe, and it starts off very well.

Really? Man, thanks! You don't know how that means to me, especially coming from a person in a place like this.

I have no complaints as far except for maybe a lack of originality, but what I've read yet is nonetheless entertaining and well-written.

Well, I never wanted it to be original. I sorta took some bits out of Terminator, Starship Troopers, Halo, StarCraft, StarWars, StarTrek, Aliens and other stuff. I'm attempting to mix em all up and end up with something cool.

One thing which I particular enjoy is that it gives the reader a clear overview over what's going on without being too vague and undetailed.

Thanks, I tried to be detailed without overloading information. When I started writing stuff some time ago, most people tend to complain with my overdetailedness, so I tried to be less detailed so I can reach to the common man while being detailed enough to satisfy those who are well versed in reading and stuff.

As for a title, I'm not sure... what about "The Hammer Strikes" ??

That sounds unoriginal, no offense. But I'm content with not having a title for now.

BTW - in case you want to know what my sci-fi universe looks like (when you announced help with developing your sci-fi 'verse, my first response was to point out similarities between your 'verse and mine), you can check out the revised version of fic "The Wormhole War" which has recently been updated with a 4th chapter.

(Yep, I know that I have the least shame of all shameless pluggers. But it's the only way I can get people to read my fics)

Hmmm, I'll check it out. I need all the inspiration I can. Heh, its no wonder our universes are similar, my concepts are barely original and come from popular sci-fi franchises.

Shroom Man 777 wrote:

Peregrin Toker wrote:WOW!

I've waited a long time to see a fic set in your own universe, and it starts off very well.

Really? Man, thanks! You don't know how that means to me, especially coming from a person in a place like this.

Well, I thought that you were going to start writing immediately after that thread where you asked for help with your 'verse was dead and publish a chapter soon.

(to be fair, the first two-three chapters of my "The Wormhole War" also lay around on my harddisk doing nothing until I decided to post it)

Hmmm, I'll check it out. I need all the inspiration I can. Heh, its no wonder our universes are similar, my concepts are barely original and come from popular sci-fi franchises.

Well, I am neither too original in my writing - once I've finished TWW (a job which probably will take years) I'll include a list of references and inspiration from elsewhere. (some of the inspiration, however is quite obvious - anyone with a vague knowledge of WH40K will be quick to point out the similarity between the Imperial Space Marines and the Xvarrol)

As for the premise behind the setting of TWW is that:

1. I wanted to create a realistic space opera. As a result, I made sure that all of the fictional devices and contraptions were based upon real-life science. (however, to be honest I'll admit that TWW employs a lot of edgy "fringe-science")
But when writing TWW, telling a story is the highest of my priorities.
It is interesting if you compare my universe with the fan-created Orion's Arm RPG setting, a sci-fi universe whose makers started out writing space opera just for the sake of making it as realistic as possible. Surprisingly, Orion's Arm is much less realistic than The Wormhole War.

2. I wanted to write a sci-fi story which depicted war as something abominable and horrible. (I'm not sure whether I'm fulfilling this - while the ground battles are quite gritty, the space battles seem rather sanitized)

3. OK, the above aren't the primary premise of TWW. The central premise of TWW is... well, I can't tell it without giving away an enormous spoiler regarding the ending. But I'm hinting towards it.

A touch too brief, really, even though it is only an introduction.

And 'BSE' is an unfortunate name for a star empire.

victorhadin wrote:A touch too brief, really, even though it is only an introduction.

And 'BSE' is an unfortunate name for a star empire.

I know its brief, but I'm just starting. Heck, it's probably not a full chapter. I don't even know how to organize it into chapters. I'm just a starter.

And what's wrong with 'BSE'?

EDIT:

For the title, how about "My Life for the Sovereignty"?

BSE = Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy = mad cow disease.

Lol. Hmmm.... I'm gonna repost the introductory chapter.

How's this for an intro?

SOLDIERS OF THE SOVEREIGNTY

Intro:

The date was April 25, 2345, the planet was Daron, a colony of the United Sovereignty of Earth. The situation was tense; an armed militia group which goes by the name of Gamma-Sigma had taken over Daron a week ago. The Gamma-Sigma claims to be a group of freedom fighters combating the tyranny of the Bragulan Star Empire, a massive totalitarian nation of bear like humanoids.

Normally, militia which was against the BSE would be supported by Earth, but this group is notorious for its violent actions towards both the BSE and Earth. The USE colony was captured, the unprepared civilian defense forces all killed and the civilians held hostage.

The Sovereignty responded by sending a small task force composed of four destroyers and a light carrier, all of which belonged to the United Sovereignty Marine Corps. The tiny fleet was hiding behind a meteor belt near the planet, avoiding sensors and probes which could warn the Gamma-Sigma. After a week of monitoring Daron’s condition, the fleet had determined that it was the time to take action. First, a sensor satellite would be shot down, it was the only sensor array the colony possessed, and with it knocked out, the Gamma-Sigma would be blind. Then a trio of Gamma-Sigma light cruisers defending the planet would be engaged, rendering the planet defenseless against attacks from orbit. Lastly, marines would be sent to finish the job, to terminate the forces of the Gamma-Sigma, free the hostages and capture the leaders which are located in Laketown, Daron’s only city.

It was a perfectly sound plan, eliminating the primary threats with speed and precision while keeping the collateral damage and the losses at a minimal.

And today, June 25, is D-day.


USE Light Carrier, Iron Fist

“Listen up, men. Our squad, Baylor squad, along with Nickerson squad will be among the first squads to set foot on Daron. We will destroy a defensive missile battery north east of Laketown to make it easier for our transport craft to land and deploy more troops. We will land 30 miles away from the installation and make our way on hover cycles. After wasting them, dropships will then arrive and deploy more troops and we all make our way into Laketown. Gamma-Sigma’s leaders and hostages are holed in inside the City Hall. Hopefully we can make our way into the City Hall without too much problems,” Lt. John Baylor said to his men as he pointed to a holographic representation of Laketown and the areas surrounding it, the places of importance were highlighted.

“From our Intel, we know that Laketown has a light cruiser’s worth of troops defending it. We also know that they are quite well trained; this particular bunch of Gamma-Sigma has recently slaughtered a couple of Bragulan counter terrorist task forces. That might not be much, but it tells us that these buggers have first hand experience. So, don’t underestimate them. Any questions?” continued Lt. Baylor.

“Why does it have to be us who has to take down the defense?” asked Pvt. Kevin L. Anderson.

“That’s because we’re damn good and I’m a genius,” replied Baylor, many troops laughed lightly.

“What if we get shot down by the missile battery that we’re supposed to kill?” asked another soldier.

“That’s possible, but it’s not very likely. Firstly, there’s going to be a thunder storm, we’re going to use that as cover. Secondly, we’re going to jam their sensors, and Gamma-Sigma usually uses Bragulan equipment; so, it’s not likely that they’ll get a lock on us. But other dropships might not be so fortunate, since they’ll be landing closer to Laketown.” Baylor responded, the holographic representation of Laketown changing into a representation of the Gamma-Sigma missile batteries. “Are there any more questions? None? Okay. This mission won’t be our first of this type, that’s probably why we’re the ones doing this. You guys aren’t rookies, so, I expect all of you to do your job well and I expect all of you to come back alive. No screw ups, okay? Class dismissed.”

The men went out of the briefing room and proceeded to wherever they wished to go. The mission would begin in around an hour, so the men had time to go around and do whatever they wish. Most of the squad, including Lt. Baylor himself, proceeded to the not so spacious and not so clean mess hall.

“Hey, Mark, gimme the usual,” said the lieutenant. Mark was the cook, a chubby guy, pale skin, messy white chef’s clothing which really contrasts to Baylor’s spotless black shirt and pants.

“One cup o’ coffee and two donuts, right? Yeah. BRENT!!! YOU INCOMPETENT TWAT, A CAN OF SLURM AND A HAMBURGER!!!” Mark screamed to his assistant as he went back to his crossword puzzle. “So, your squad is going to be one of the first to touch down, eh? Good luck dude, not that you’ll need it.”

John chuckled, over time his squad has developed quite a reputation. His squad wasn’t the best, but it always came out with no casualties and with hardly any serious injuries, his men always finished their mission, and after the mission, they’d stuff themselves full with food and beer. “Thanks. Oh, and Mark, get a lot of beer since there’s going to be a hell of a party when we come back.”

John got his Slurm and his burger, sat on a steel chair and placed his meal on the table. He opened his Slurm and poured the soft drink into a mug and took a small sip, then he proceeded to munch on his burger. He closed his eyes for a second and savored the juicy beef. Most other ships had very little real meat, often used only during celebrations, most of the time they just used artificial meat. While artificial meat wasn’t that bad, it was nowhere near as good as the real thing, luckily the Iron Fist had a ready supply of beef and pork and sausages, Baylor Squad being officially tasked by Commander Nathaniel to smuggle in the real meat.

A shadow fell over John and he opened his eyes, he turned his head to see the massive commanding figure of the officer in charge of the Iron Fist. Captain Nathaniel Armstrong.

“Sir,” John said, he stood up, gave his officer in charge a salute, sat down and bit off a huge chunk from his burger.

“Don’t stuff yourself too much, lieutenant, you might throw up when the dropship enters Daron’s atmosphere,” the tall, well muscled 35 year old man said. “Oh, and there’s only half an hour before you guys are supposed to suit up and board the d-ships, you better get going.”

“Yes, boss,” replied John, swallowing the last of his burger and gulping down the last of his Slurm. He stood up and excused himself, he went to suit up.

Is getting better - I particularly like some of the details such as artificial meat (something which IIRC already exists) and dropships being referred to as "d-ships".

BTW - for some reason, I have the feeling the Gamma-Sigma are based upon some real-life guerilla group, but I can't remember exactly which one. (perhaps some Ukrainian partisans who opposed both German and Soviet troops during WW2?)

BTW#2 - Soldiers Of The Sovereignty is an OK title. At least it's better than my "The Wormhole War".

I like your fanfic so far, but be sure to start puttin yer characters through INTENSE STALINGRAD STYLE COMBAT fairly soon, heheheheh. Also that private Kevin L. Anderson guy, maybe you should give him a more fitting middle initial, such as "J".

Peregrin Toker wrote:Is getting better - I particularly like some of the details such as artificial meat (something which IIRC already exists) and dropships being referred to as "d-ships".

Thanks. Artificial meat already exists, but they're not as good as real meat. Now, imagine military grade artificial meat. Eeeew!

BTW - for some reason, I have the feeling the Gamma-Sigma are based upon some real-life guerilla group, but I can't remember exactly which one. (perhaps some Ukrainian partisans who opposed both German and Soviet troops during WW2?)

Umm... I just used some name of some local fraternety group

BTW#2 - Soldiers Of The Sovereignty is an OK title. At least it's better than my "The Wormhole War".

Thanks.

I like your fanfic so far, but be sure to start puttin yer characters through INTENSE STALINGRAD STYLE COMBAT fairly soon, heheheheh. Also that private Kevin L. Anderson guy, maybe you should give him a more fitting middle initial, such as "J".

Stalingrad style combat? Dude, this is the 24th century! I'll base my combat more on Blackhawk Down + Predator (where they waste the guerillas) and Band of Brothers.

As for the character names, I'm using names of my classmates, some good friends are making cameos while bad ones have bad things happen to them (like having their legs blown off).

Shroom Man 777 wrote:

Peregrin Toker wrote:Is getting better - I particularly like some of the details such as artificial meat (something which IIRC already exists) and dropships being referred to as "d-ships".

Thanks. Artificial meat already exists, but they're not as good as real meat. Now, imagine military grade artificial meat. Eeeew!

However, in the future I think artificial meat will probably at some point become practically indistinguishable from authentic meat.

BTW - for some reason, I have the feeling the Gamma-Sigma are based upon some real-life guerilla group, but I can't remember exactly which one. (perhaps some Ukrainian partisans who opposed both German and Soviet troops during WW2?)

Umm... I just used some name of some local fraternety group

I wasn't referring to their name.

Peregrin Toker wrote:
However, in the future I think artificial meat will probably at some point become practically indistinguishable from authentic meat.

Well, artificially made meat + lousy cooking is quite distinguishable from real meat + fine cooking. That's for sure.

I wasn't referring to their name.

Just their MO, I see.

A bit short, but meh. I might lengthen it later. As for now, this is what I have.

Chapter 1

“Hmmm…. Is it just me or is my jockstrap a little bit itchy?” asked Private First Class Jedd McLooney, his hands trying to scratch his armored groin.

“Maybe it’s just because you don’t wash your cock,” retorted another private, Joshua Cruise as he wore his helmet.

“Can you guys just zip it? It’s already bad enough that I have to deal with your smell, but can you please just not tell us about how unwashed your ding-a-ling is?” snapped a female squadmate.

“Ouch, Carla, that was just painful,” replied Joshua, dramatically putting his hands on his chest, as if his heart was breaking.

“Okay guys, settle down, settle down,” said Lt. John Baylor, entering the dropship, the d-ship was in the docking bay of the Iron Fist and a few of the squad members were already in the ship, suiting up as they wait for the rest of them. Baylor was already in full battle gear, wearing all of his BS-300, except the helmet, which was held by his left hand, his right holding his MBR-40, phased plasma rifle. “Let’s quit bickering and get focused.”

“Sir, yes sir!” Jedd replied, eager to push the issue of his itching groin away.

“Alright, let’s get ready to rumble!” said Sgt. Eric Ryan as he hopped into the ship with his C-28 ‘Deadshot’ Gauss rifle. Following him were more troopers, more marines. It was five minutes before the d-ship was supposed to fly and the transport craft was getting full.

“Is everybody here?” John asked, although he didn’t need to, he knew how many men was in his squad, he knew them like friends, like brothers.

“Yeah!” said a marine, his face hidden by his helmet.

“Yes, chief.”

“Yeah, boss.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Yup.”

“Okay. Pilot, all of Baylor Squad is in the d-ship. How many minutes until take off?” he asked, he could feel the Iron Fist and her escort ships moving into battle. When combat was imminent, it was always tense, the soldiers were always eager, excitement coursed through the air, like electricity.

“Twelve minutes before we’re supposed to depart and head for the planet, the Iron Fist and her escorts will engage the enemy cruisers in eight minutes, right after destroying the sensor sattelite. We’ll go and sneak off into the planet, hopefully we won’t be detected and we’ll use the thunderstorm as cover in our descent into the planet. The other drop ship containing Nickerson squad will also depart with us and follow a very similar course,” the pilot replied coolly as he chewed gum.

“Nickerson will be helping us kill the Bragulan missile battery, right?” asked Jedd.

“Yup,” replied Carla. “They’ll support us.”

“I hope they don’t mess up, last time they covered our backs, one of us got a bullet in his ass,” joked Jedd.

“Don’t worry, Jedd, bullets won’t be able to go into your fat ass!” laughed Joshua, the rest of Baylor Squad followed suit.

“Why you little weed!!!!” Jedd roared in mock anger as he waved a fist at Joshua. “I’m gonna KILL YO-“

“What the hell was that?” asked Carla, everyone became silent as the Iron Fist vibrated slightly.

___

“WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!” yelled Nathaniel from his command chair as the Iron Fist shook again. The small tiny explosions dotting the debris filled space surrounding the boxy warship was displayed on the massive holographic screen in the chaotic bridge, the explosions were small and were being deflected by the ship’s powerful shields. “What the hell was that?”

“Captain, the Gamma-Sigma has set up mines in the debris field, our sensors didn’t detect them, but they seem to be doing insignificant damage to our shields,” replied an ensign who was quickly inputting commands into his computer console.

“Good Lord! Put us in red alert; tell the destroyers what happened, put them in red alert too. All weapon systems online, shields at maximum! Ready all fighters to deploy at any second, ready the dropships,” Nathaniel ordered his men as they all began to sweat. Nathaniel wasn’t only in charge of the Iron Fist; he was in charge of the entire task force. “Surprise has been compromised; the Gamma-Sigma cruisers will be on us in a flash. Clear up the mine field, the area must be safe for the fighters and the d-ships to be deployed. Be ready to launch long ranged missiles to shoot down the sensor satellite as soon as it comes within range.”

“Aye captain,” responded the communications officer as he began to relay orders to the four destroyers escorting the Iron Fist.

“Captain, the enemy trio is coming at us. They are launching fighters and long range missiles,” reported an ensign. “The Iron Fist and her destroyer escorts have eliminated the mine field, fighters are deploying. The sensor satellite is still within range of our missiles, the Iron Fist has launched 4 missiles.”

“Communications, inform the Valiant and the Steadfast to move in and engage the fighters, let them cover us with everything they got. Launch our fighters at the enemy cruisers, arm them with torpedoes. We need them down quick. Let the Fearless and Braveheart launch long range fire at the cruisers. Let our fighters and destroyers concentrate on one destroyer at a time,” hollered Nathaniel. He began pacing around the bridge, anxious, the Gamma-Sigma might be outnumbered, but they have Bragulan cruisers, and Bragulan cruisers had a reputation of being tough and powerful. “Helm, take us down, we need to keep on firing at the cruisers’ underbellies and stay clear of their big guns. Fire torpedoes, particle cannons and long range missiles at the cruisers, remember, one cruiser at a time, concentrate on the nearest one, all of us. Someone get me a clear view of those cruisers, exactly what are they?”

“Sensors indicate that they are FLM-55, Borev class,” replied someone manning the powerful sensors of the Iron Fist.

“Shit, Intel was right. This is going to be one hell of a ride, shit, shit, shit!” Nathaniel yelled as he began cursing.

___

“What’s going on?” shouted John to the d-ship pilot, an attractive blonde who was chewing gum.

“We’ve hit a mine field, the Gamma-Sigma ships have detected us and are engaging us, Nathaniel is pushing our plans ahead, and we might have to depart in any second. Fighters are being scrambled; the task force is going into formation. The Iron Fist has launched long range missiles to knock down the sensor satellite; it shouldn’t be long until it’s down. And then we’re going to be sent to Daron,” replied the pilot.

“B-E-A-utiful, just beautiful,” commented Jedd sardonically as he slapped his forehead.

___

The long range missiles streaked through the void, all four of them. They neared the Gamma-Sigma cruisers and passed them, headed for the satellite which orbited Daron, which was behind the cruisers. The cruisers fired interception missiles, lasers, plasma bolts and particle bolts, determined to turn the missiles into space dust. One missile was clipped by a plasma bolt, it whizzed out of control and a particle bolt blew it into oblivion. Another missile had its tail melted by a laser; it was too damaged to continue flying. The second to the last one was grazed by a laser, its thrusters were damaged. It immediately changed its course, adjusting to the sudden impact, its AI trying to correct its course. It homed in on the satellite, it slammed on a solar panel and detonated, shearing the panel off and deforming one side of the satellite, but it was not good enough, the satellite was still functional. The last missile was almost grazed by a laser, it began evasive maneuvers, and its low grade sensor jammers were being put to the test. A hot whitish-blue plasma bolt streaked by it, a missile exploded very near it, but the missile continued on unscathed. A dissipating laser beam struck its head, not enough to destroy the missile, but enough fry the primary sensors. The missile was flying blind. The AI adjusted its course and began to vector into the suspected coordinates of the satellite. The missile was now a mile away from the satellite, a hundred meters, fifty meters, ten meters, it was now right beside the satellite. The missile’s still functional passive sensors detected the satellite; the AI couldn’t switch its current course for its engines were out of fuel. The AI activated a proximity detonation, exploding near the satellite in hopes of taking it down or doing enough damage to render it inoperative. The satellite was caught in the blast and emerged quite damaged, but its primary systems were still functional, its power was down by 60%, it was still operating within acceptable parameters. It had survived, but the proximity blast had altered the satellite’s orbit. Slowly but surely, the satellite began its descent into Daron, burning up in the planet’s atmosphere.
___

“Captain, the satellite has been destroyed and the lead cruiser has suffered some damage from our initial volley, the attack of the Braveheart and Fearless and our fighters and bombers,” an ensign manning the sensors said. The Iron Fist was shaking as the first of the enemy’s volleys reached them. Thankfully, the Borev class light cruisers were pretty short sighted, their sensors were low grade, the two d-ships would be able to sneak past their sensors without being detected and blown to smithereens. This short sightedness was also gave the Borev class a short weapons range, explaining their late return fire.

“Great! Launch the d-ships! Now!” ordered Nathaniel, this was urgent. The Gamma-Sigma now knew of the task force and were already returning fire. No doubt the Gamma-Sigma ground forces were being mobilized. Their surprise attack was now ruined and Baylor and Nickerson squads would now have greater difficulty in taking down Laketown’s missile batteries. There were other options to knock out the missile batteries, an orbital bombardment would work, but the task force was preoccupied with the Gamma-Sigma ships and when it had the chance to opportunity for bombardment, it would be too late, the Gamma-Sigma personnel on the planet would’ve already fled. An air strike would be good, but they hadn’t the fighters to spare. Hence, they would have to send in the marines, and the Iron Fist’s marine contingent are among the best of the best.

___

“Alright, time to go,” said the pilot as the d-ship hovered and proceeded towards the dock’s massive doors.

“Okay, men, get ready. We might be in for a bumpy ride,” said Baylor, his men were quiet now; they were anxious, excited, tense and also afraid. Dying while still in transit towards the planet was a big and horrible possibility. The only sounds in the room were the chewing of gum, the tapping of feet and the soft hum of the ship as it began its journey.

The dock doors opened and the transport craft slowly passed by the doors and through the force field which was protecting the docks from the vacuum of space. Another d-ship followed suit. Four fighters then lifted off and provided escort for the two transports. When they were far enough, they increased their velocity rapidly and streaked through space, heading towards Daron, avoiding the lumbering Gamma-Sigma cruisers.

___

“Sir, the d-ships are heading towards Daron, the enemy cruisers have not detected them. Sir, the enemy fighters have emptied their fighter bays, their fighters are heading towards us and they are arming their heavy weaponry,” reported the ensign.

“Are the Valiant and Steadfast in formation?” asked Nathaniel, the Valiant and Steadfast were to block the fighters from engaging the Iron Fist.

“They are already there sir.”

“Good.”
___

The SNT, the Gamma-Sigma’s fighters, also the Bragulan Star Empire’s standard fighters, began launching their payload of missiles towards the destroyers. The initial volley struck against the shields, but the shields held on. The Valiant and the Steadfast returned fire; plasma bolts and missiles streaked towards the SNTs and vaporized some of the leading fighters as they attempted evasive maneuvers. The Valiant and the Steadfast pushed forward and disgorged their own fighters to engage the SNTs. The SNTs continued their relentless assault and paid no heed to the destroyer’s fighters as they scattered and encircled the Valiant and Steadfast like a swarm of angry bees. The SNT Bombers launched their payload of torpedoes as the SNT Fighters launched their missiles, shields flickered as the explosions dotted the weakening shields.

The Valiant and the Steadfast’s fighters were SF-44 Rapiers, sleek and fast craft which were larger than the SNTs, they packed more firepower and sported light shielding. The SNTs were faster and more maneuverable, although they had less firepower and no shielding. SF-44s were also warp capable.

The SF-44s hunted the SNTs in packs; they were organized and extremely efficient. Several plasma bolts were enough to tear through the SNTs’ light armor and destroy them while the SNTs had to fire quite a lot to take down an SF-44. The SF-44s were racking enormous kills, but the SNTs were very great in number and were threatening to overwhelm the destroyers, the Rapiers had to spread out.

___

Jeremy Irons was a Rapier pilot; he was in charge of his fighter wing. He was Eagle Leader. His Rapier streaked through space and he shot three bolts at a nearby SNT Bomber, the bomber’s wings were sheared off and it exploded into the Valiant’s shields.

“Good job, Jer, watch it, you’ve got four on your tail.”

“Roger that, Eagle Two. I’ll try to shake ‘em off.”

With that, Jeremy sent his Rapier into several barrel rolls, the SNT Fighters quickly followed suit as they fired their K-bolters at his Rapier. Jeremy did a rapid corkscrew and pulled high up. The SNTs quickly followed and were rapidly closing in, Jeremy then changed course, rapidly diving towards the Valiant. As he was very near the Valiant, he decelerated shot down an SNT which was in front of him. The SNT exploded in a brilliant flash, Jeremy again pulled up. The SNTs behind him did the same, save for one, which was almost caught in the blast and whose sensors were temporarily blinded, that SNT exploded as it impacted the Valiant’s shields. The one right behind the downed SNT was clipped by a plasma bolt, coming from the Valiant’s defensive turret, the SNT pilot hadn’t the time to scream.

“Nice trick, Jer, oh crap! The bogeys are closing in! They’re right on your tail.”

“I know that, Eagle Two and I’d appreciate it if you quit babbling and actually help me out!” Jeremy said, he was grinning, due to both his joke and due to the exhilaration of dog fight. He accelerated, trying to outrun the pursuing SNTs, the SNTs increased their speed to catch up with Jeremy’s Rapier. Then Jeremy slammed on the breaks, his Rapier suddenly slowed down and his pursuers streaked past him. One of them blew up, Eagle Two launched a plasma missile and it slammed dead on the SNT’s cockpit. “Nice shooting, Eagle Two, good to see you do something other than talk.”

“Up yours, pal,” replied Eagle Two as Jeremy sent a barrage of plasma bolts towards the remaining SNT, the SNT was torn into several pieces and blew up.

“Eagle Leader, this is Valiant, we’ve got bogeys unloading torpedoes on our asses and our defensive batteries have minimal coverage on our hineys. We’d REALLY appreciate it if you’d lend a hand before we are anally violated.”

“Okay guys, let’s save our ship before the bears rape ‘em,” Jeremy said to his fighter wing. The fighter wing reformed and headed for the rear of the Valiant, where many SNTs were doing bombing runs. “Alright gentlemen, let’s waste these bears!”

“YEEEHAW!!!” yelled Eagle Two as the entire wing descended upon a dozen or so unsuspecting SNTs. The ships opened fire, spewing out plasma bolts, shearing the SNTs to pieces. The wing quickly maneuvered and took down a trio of SNT bombers as they began a bombing run; they never knew what hit them. A trio of Rapiers attacked a lone SNT bomber like a wolf pack; their white-blue hot plasma bolts shearing through the thin Bragulan armor and tearing the SNT to pieces. The SNT bombers were decimated and the SNT fighters began to swarm the offending Rapiers, attempting to stop the Rapiers, but the damage had been done.

“Jumpin’ Jesus on a pogo stick!” screamed Eagle Three as dozens of SNT Fighters began to enclose them. “Eagle Leader, what the heck do we do?”

“Launch our plasma torpedoes! NOW!!!” ordered Jeremy, his wing complied and almost every Rapier of his wing launched a torpedo, those without torpedoes launched their compliment of missiles. The torpedoes and missiles streaked through space and detonated amidst the incoming SNT Fighters, the blast wave caught them and blew most of them to pieces, and the remainders were knocked around like small plastic models inside a whirlwind. The shields flickered due to the multi-megaton blasts and for a second, they failed but they were immediately restored thanks to the auxiliary batteries. The Valiant then imitated the Eagles, launching some torpedoes (which were designed to bash capital ships and warships) at the SNTs, decimating huge numbers of the Gamma-Sigma fighters in massive plasma and nuclear explosions.
___

The Fearless and Braveheart were Bombard class destroyers; they held very little fighters and were specialized to fire torpedoes from long range as opposed to the Valiant and Steadfast, which were Enforcer class destroyers, designed to be jack of all trades, having decent firepower and a decent compliment of fighters.

When the battle began, both immediately started launching torpedoes towards the lead Borev class light cruiser and were helped by the Iron Fist’s fighters and the Iron Fist’s volleys as well. The lead cruiser was the War Monger; it was a 20 year old cruiser which was refitted with extremely powerful shields, on par with those of a normal cruiser. It withstood a great amount of punishment and concentrated its fire at the Iron Fist. The other two cruisers were the Liberator and the Occupier, their entire compliment of fighters were engaging the Valiant and the Steadfast and so far, the Valiant and the Fearless were holding on. The Liberator and Occupier surged forward as the War Monger retreated to the rear to regenerate its almost shields.

“Captain, the Liberator and the Occupier’s contingent of SNTs have exhausted their primary weapons, they will soon be going back to their mother ships to refuel!” exclaimed Nathaniel’s ensign, relieved that the pressure was off the Valiant and the Fearless and relieved that the War Monger had stopped its assault on the Iron Fist.

“Rearm our quickly fighters and then send them to engage the retreating SNTs! Make sure they don’t make it back to their mother ships! Order the Valiant and Steadfast to blow those SNTs to hell, make their return trip as dangerous as possible. And begin firing at the Occupier and Liberator. Let the Iron Fist shoot at both the Occupier and Liberator. Braveheart and the Fearless, concentrate their fire on the War Monger,” ordered Nathaniel. “The War Monger is their capital ship, if we shoot it down, they’ll fall into disarray and confusion, that’s what I’m aiming for. By the way, what’s the status of the dropship?”

“They’re descending into Daron’s atmosphere as we speak, sir,” replied the ensign.

“Great, and our shields, how are they fairing?” asked Nathaniel.

“They’re at 65%, the Fearless and Braveheart were constantly slamming the War Monger, so the WM couldn’t have hit us that much, your strategy was very good, captain,” the ensign replied, admiring his commanding officer for bringing them out of a bad situation. The Iron Fist shook again, the Liberator and Occupier were beginning to hammer the task force’s flagship.
___

The Iron Fist launched its Rapiers and bombers after rearming them and they quickly descended at the injured SNTs, seeking to join the fight. The Rapiers from the Valiant and Steadfast were already descending on the fleeing SNTs, hungry for retribution and leading the way. The STNs were trying to avoid the fire of the Valiant and Steadfast when the Rapiers from the Valiant and Steadfast slashed through the them with their plasma bolts; the newcomers from the Iron Fist were fresh and quickly gained kills from afar by launching their payload of torpedoes and missiles. The thermonuclear exchange decimating the SNTs, their once overwhelming numbers reduced into nothing.

The Liberator and Occupier avenged their fallen fighters by pummeling the Iron Fist with their massive guns. Huge K-bolters, mass drivers and missiles were slamming on the Iron Fist’s shields as well as the Steadfast and Valiant. But the USE ships countered, delivering massive blows in the form of heavy torpedoes, nuclear missiles, massive plasma bolts and the dreaded particle cannons. The Liberator and Occupier’s shields were hammered from three directions, plus the fire from the fighters which decimated the SNTs. The Iron Fist’s bombers and fighters were the ones attacking the Occupier; they launched their entire cache of torpedoes, missiles and missile bombs, doing considerable damage to their shields. The Valiant and Steadfast’s fighters quickly went back and rearmed in their mother ships and joined the fight, defending the Iron Fist’s bombers from the remaining STNs and launching their own missiles and torpedoes.

During all this, two dropships were discreetly entering Daron’s atmosphere…


[NEXT CHAPTER BEGINS HERE]

Hmmm.... is it just me.... or are my works a bit.... half done. Am I pushing them out too prematurely? Hmmm... do they need revisions? Are the chapters too short? Bah. I think I should delete this thread and start a new one, since I get the feeling that I'm making half assed posts.

Or maybe this thread is where you'll critique my initial works, and then I'll post my finished works in another thread.

I think that the first chapter - which BTW is rather well-read and also does a nice job of portraying chaos and tension - indeed seems not-quite-finished as it kinda needs a conclusion for the space battle.

Other than that, I have almost nothing but praise for it. (except for maybe the slight confusion in the depiction of the "ambushing" - but I assume it's the intention)

Peregrin Toker wrote:I think that the first chapter - which BTW is rather well-read and also does a nice job of portraying chaos and tension - indeed seems not-quite-finished as it kinda needs a conclusion for the space battle.

Other than that, I have almost nothing but praise for it. (except for maybe the slight confusion in the depiction of the "ambushing" - but I assume it's the intention)

What ambushing? The mines? Well, when the mines blew up near the Iron Fist, this alerted the GS cruisers of the USMC's presence and hence, the battle had to begin.

Hmmm...... I'll edit the first chapter, let's see how you like it. It might be half assed though since I'm doing this at two in the morning, but let's see how it goes!

EDIT: Look, I've integrated the 2nd chapter into the first chapter, I hope you like it. I'll make the ground war the third chapter.

Ummm... comments would be highly appreciated.

Sorry if I'm late... but that space battle simply blew me away! You're good at writing space battles, that's for sure... in fact, it might be one of the best I've read.

I currently don't have any points of criticism... except for that it seemed a little silly that you named one of your fighter pilots after the actor Jeremy Irons.


BTW - just a question: Is the Bragulan Star Empire based upon the Soviet Union? Not just that whole totalitarianism thing, but there's also the fact that the Bragulans resemble bears more than anything else... ("The Russian Bear", get it?) and the performance difference between the SNTs and the SF-44s is pretty much the same as the difference in performance between NATO and USSR fighters. (The NATO/USE fighters are better armed but heavier and more cumbersome, whereas the USSR/Bragulan fighters have lighter armament but are more maneuvrable)

Peregrin Toker wrote:Sorry if I'm late... but that space battle simply blew me away! You're good at writing space battles, that's for sure... in fact, it might be one of the best I've read.

I currently don't have any points of criticism... except for that it seemed a little silly that you named one of your fighter pilots after the actor Jeremy Irons.

NO WONDER THAT NAME SOUNDED FAMILIAR! I named him after a former school mate, and I had to use a decent last name, so I choosed Irons. Jeremy Irons was a familiar name but I didn't know where I heard it from.

BTW - just a question: Is the Bragulan Star Empire based upon the Soviet Union? Not just that whole totalitarianism thing, but there's also the fact that the Bragulans resemble bears more than anything else... ("The Russian Bear", get it?) and the performance difference between the SNTs and the SF-44s is pretty much the same as the difference in performance between NATO and USSR fighters. (The NATO/USE fighters are better armed but heavier and more cumbersome, whereas the USSR/Bragulan fighters have lighter armament but are more maneuvrable)

Well, the BSE is based on the USSR and is also based on other things. Like SW's Empire and also a bit of Nazi Germany. I made the bear race long before, a few years ago. They started out as a comedic concept, they were bear creatures whcih spewed acidic snot from their noses, hence, booger bears. Then I made them into a totalitarian inhumane nation ruled by a tyrant, who was named after a classmate who we teased "booger bear" with. And I based this bear nation on the Soviet Union and the GE and when I was making this fic, I tried to turn the booger bear concept into something serious and not comedic.

This chapter deals with the first ground engagement in the entire battle.

CHAPTER 2

“Holy shit!” exclaimed Joshua as the holoscreen displayed SNTs swarming the Valiant, SNTs exploded as the rectangular warship launched volleys of plasma bolts and missiles. The Valiant’s shields flashed as it protected the thick bluish-gray hull from the missiles and the torpedoes.

“That’s intense,” commented Jedd, gaping at the thermonuclear fireworks. The Baylor and Nickerson d-ships were currently right above the planet, preparing to go into the atmosphere. The pilot and the co-pilot were doing last minute calculations and checking on the activity in Laketown.

“Pilot, give me a status on the missile batteries defending Laketown,” ordered Lt. Baylor. If the missile batteries were in red alert, there would be a fair chance that they would be intercepted and blown into pieces before they even had a chance to set foot upon Daron. This was worrying the men; they knew that this was one of the most crucial moments of their drop.

“On it, sir,” said the sharply as she typed down commands on her computer console. The complex communications equipment found on the dropships were able to intercept and eavesdrop on the transmissions coming from the Gamma-Sigma base, and if the encryption of the transmissions were minimal, they would be able to listen on everything. “Sir, it the Gamma-Sigma are on alert, but the ground forces haven’t fully mobilized since they aren’t expecting an incursion into the planet this early.”

“Good,” commented Baylor. Sighs of relief filled the room as he rested his helmeted head on his chair’s headrest. The seats on the d-ship might not be the most comfortable, but if there’s a chance of you being blown out of the sky, you wouldn’t care. “So, I guess this means that we’re going in. Alright, Baylor squad, are you ready?!”

The troops replied loudly, cheering amidst their excitement, their fear, their anxiety. The troops were ready for war.

“Okay! Pilot, bring us in! Signal Nickerson squad to follow our lead.”

“Yes sir! Strap yourselves in boys, we might be heading for some turbulence” replied the pilot as she steered the d-ship into Daron’s atmosphere. She activated the sensor jammers and deactivated all sensors, except the passive ones. The Nickerson d-ship followed suit, it was right behind the Baylor ship. The fighter escorts, eager for real battle and obeying their orders, peeled away from the d-ships, heading back to their mother ships. The transport shipss streaked into the upper atmosphere, their velocity was hypersonic and the air around them was burning up due to the friction. The ships slowed their velocity by staying in the upper atmosphere and by traveling in S like patterns. They stayed out of range from Laketown’s sensors and went to the planet’s stratosphere without incident.

“Okay…. Now we’re heading for the troposphere and into the storm clouds and try to stay clear of the missiles,” the pilot mumbled to herself. Even in the 24th century, flying into thunderstorms was not an easy task and it takes an accomplished pilot to pull it off.

The ships descended into the troposphere and dove into the massive cumulus-nimbus clouds without hesitation. They increased their speed and continued their steady descent towards the planet as lightning flashed and thunder rumbled around them. The dropship began to shake due to the turbulent air.

“Hold on, we’re heading in for some chop,” commented the pilot as several lightning bolts struck the ship’s wings and caused them to shake very violently.

“I’m gonna hurl,” a trooper groaned. “Someone should install barf bags into these suits…”

“U-u-u-u-gggh!” shouted another trooper as the turbulence caused his chair to vibrate vigorously.

“Don’t be getting constipated, boys, we’re going to be out of these storm clouds,” said the pilot. She steered the ship and pressed some buttons, she flipped some switches and pulled some levers. The turbulence decreased and the sky grew brighter as they exited the storm clouds. The pilot slowed the ship down and exhaled a sigh of relief.

“Phew! That was some good flying, pilot!” John said as he loosened his seatbelt. “I thought this ship was gonna fall apar- ”

“Jesus!” the pilot yelped as her console beeped vigorously. She sent the ship into a sharp dive as a missile narrowly missed it. The missile scraped the paint of the ship and appeared to be streaking onward but instead, it exploded right behind the dropship.

“HOLY FUCK!!! HOLY FUCK!!!!” screamed Baylor, but his screams disappeared amidst the chorus of yells, screams and shouts of panic which in turn was being drowned out by the klaxons and alarms. The dropship was knocked off course and was tumbling rapidly. It almost went into a downward spiral but thankfully the pilot managed to stabilize the ship, barely. Black smoke was billowing from the ship’s rear and flames were erupting. One of the thrusters had been destroyed, the rear armor was torn off and a fuel line was in flames.

The pilot began pulling some levers and attempted to reroute fuel, she flipped some switches and stomped some pedals, and she violently turned the steering wheel in an attempt to prevent the ship from crashing. She appeared calm and she had to be if she wanted them to live, the co-pilot on the other hand, a young brown haired boy, no older than 20 was also frantically manning the controls.

“Billy, tell the Nickerson ship to go ahead without us. Tell them that we’ll try to catch up,” she said to the nervous young boy.

“Okay Marlee…. Super-six eight this is Super-six five, go ahead without us. We’ll try to catch up with you later,”

“Copy that, super-six five and good luck. Super-six eight out,” replied the other ship as it flew ahead and left the Baylor ship to its fate.

The alarms decreased in volume as the pilot, Marlee, managed to stabilize the ship. The fuel was cut off from the destroyed thruster and a series of retro thrusters and secondary boosters were used to compensate for the lost thruster. The thrusters used for hovering and for maneuvering in the airless space were also used to stabilize the ship and straighten its course. With the damage being controlled and with the ship back on its normal course, Marlee managed to wipe the sweat off of her face and rest back on her chair. She steered the ship into some clouds for cover and set the jammers on maximum intensity.

“Pilot, where did the missile come from? I want jammers on full power and I want us to land as soon as possible,” Baylor ordered as he removed his helmet and wiped the sweat off of his short black hair.

“The missile came from the forest, some life signals, a squad or two belonging to the Gamma-Sigma. Jammers are already on max and we are hiding behind some clouds, no missiles are being launched, they probably lost us,”

Baylor rested his head on his seat. “Oh boy…. They know we’re here; this won’t be easy. How far are we from the landing zone?”

“We’re almost right above the LZ, should we land?”

“Yeah, make it quick and make sure they don’t spot us.”

The d-ship descended quickly and hovered above the landing zone, its thrusters humming loudly as they kept the ship suspended in the air. Plasma cannons at the nose and tail swiveled quickly, their sensors looking for any concealed threats. The sides had automatic grenade rail launchers and more plasma cannons; they too surveyed the area and made sure that the area was secure. The guns were robotic and needed nobody to watch them, although control could be overridden and a human could man them. The sensors showed that there were no immediate threats, so the dropship landed on the ground. Its side doors and rear doors opened and the marines rushed out. They quickly formed a perimeter and surveyed the surrounding area, their weapons at the ready.

Laketown was a forest, a dry forest. Short trees, about 12 feet tall were all over the place, bushes and shrubs were everywhere. A flock of bat like creatures took to the air, flapping their wings.

“Stay sharp, men. They know were here, they’ll be ready for us. This won’t be easy,” muttered Baylor to his commlink. “The area’s clear.”

Ten hoverbikes emerged from the rear door of the ship. Two troopers hopped onto each bike, the entire squad would travel by hoverbikes towards the batteries and would dismount when they reached near enough. Equipment and supplies were placed in the compartments of the bikes and the vehicles were turned on.

“Okay, we’re all set! Pilot, get out of here while it’s safe,” ordered Baylor. Marlee obliged and the dropship quickly lifted off and streaked towards the sky, disappearing back into the thunderclouds which were now on top of the landing zone. Baylor hopped on a bike as a lightning bolt signaled the beginning of a drizzle. “Baylor squad, let’s move!”

The hoverbikes advanced through the woods at speeds of 80kph, a decent speed considering the fact that they were not traveling on roads and trees were everywhere. The drizzle had turned into shower and puddles of mud were forming. The wind picked up strength, the sky darkened and more lightning bolts slashed through Daron’s skies. They traveled through a route which the Gamma-Sigma were least likely to patrol, according to Intel at least. And so far, it was good, there was no incident. They were now very near the missile battery and the forest was growing very thick. They had to dismount; they couldn’t ride through such dense undergrowth.

“Okay men, time to walk,” Baylor ordered as he dismounted from his bike and checked the area. His men followed and after determining the area was safe, they pushed the bikes into bushes. They covered the bikes in tinfoil like material, to prevent sensors from detecting them and then they placed bushes and leaves above the semi-hidden bikes. “Let’s get moving.”

John turned off the safety of his rifle and jogged with the rest of his squad, they were very near the missile battery and it won’t take long for them to reach it and it also wouldn’t take too long for an enemy to find them.

The rain was increasing in its intensity and the droplets were splattering on his suit, thankfully his suit was sealed off from the outside environment. But that didn’t make the droplets any less annoying. The droplets, when they find their way to the helmet’s visor, could also cause visual impediment, thankfully the helmet came with a miniature version of a cap’s ‘tongue’ and the visor comes with a mini windshield wiper. The mud was growing quite sticky, in some puddles the boots would sink up to the lower shin. The lower sections of the suits were turning brown; it was the adaptive camouflage that the BS-300 battle suits sported. If the area was greenish, the suits would be green, if the area was grey or whitish, the suits would be grey or whitish. If the ground was muddy and brown, the suit’s boots would imitate the ground’s color scheme. This made the suits fit to serve in any environment without being repainted, so the marines would be adequately camouflaged wherever they went.

As a lightning bolt flashed, an emerald green K-bolt whizzed right by Baylor’s head and impacted on a tree right behind him. The trunk exploded and the remaining K-bolt residue left a green glow as well as a corrosive side effect.

“Sniper!” yelled Baylor as the entire squad crawled behind trees, rolled behind rocks or ducked on the muddy ground. Five bolts came and exploded on the tree Baylor was hiding behind, the tree was in the process of falling when John leapt and hid behind another thicker tree. The standard Bragulan B-11 K-bolter, as well as all K-bolters small and large, fired highly explosive bolts; they exploded on impact and left huge gaping holes on unarmored humans. If it exploded near you, you had a fair chance of being covered in glowing green residue, which was highly acidic. So, one could say that K-bolters were somewhat dangerous.

Baylor didn’t have to say anything, the men instinctually fired back. A cascade of plasma bolts and railgun rounds returned to where the K-bolts seemed to have originated. But the K-bolts just kept on coming.

“Eric, waste those motherfuckers!” ordered Baylor as he stuck his upper torso out of the tree and send a burst of plasma bolts towards the snipers. He could find the snipers with his suit’s sensors if he wanted too, but it was not safe, if you stuck your head out too long in the presence of snipers, you’d end up loosing it. Or at least have a huge gaping hole on your forehead. John quickly returned to his position behind the tree as the snipers returned fire.

“Sir, yes sir,” Sgt. Eric Ryan replied. He was hiding behind a bush, far from where the snipers were shooting at. It was very stupid, using K-bolters as sniper weapons; they could be easily traced since their bolts were very visible, and no half-sane sniper would want that. He traced the green K-bolts and found where the sniper would most likely be. He tapped a button on his BS-300’s wrist computer and the image in his visor intensified by 8 times. He saw the Gamma-Sigma soldier; the bear was on a tree, hidden by the leaves and branches. Eric aimed his rifle, zoomed in and got a clear view of the head. He squeezed the trigger of his C-28 “Deadshot” gauss rifle, the sniper railgun’s magnetic rails hummed and a single 10mm tungsten round was sent at supersonic speeds towards the bear’s head. The bear never knew what hit him, the round punched through his carbon armor like paper, tore through his skull and left a one and a half inch wide exit wound. One down, Eric looked around and spotted the rest of the snipers, seven to go. He sent their coordinates to the rest of the squad and aimed for another one.

Baylor took a peek and sent three snap shots at the general direction of the sniper. He went back to his hiding position, crouched behind a fallen log. His wrist computer beeped, he pressed a button and the coordinates of the snipers were shown in his heads up display (HUD). He crawled to the side and took a peek, this time with infrared vision readied and he spotted the sniper and sent two plasma bolts towards the bear’s torso. The bolts passed through the body with extreme ease and proceeded to tear through the tree trunk behind him. As the blue hot plasma bolts entered the bear, they heated up the body’s liquids so much that the bear’s chest exploded, like a sealed up package of meat in a microwave oven. The bear fell down dead, vaporized blood exiting the holes in the armor. Baylor quickly crouched down and went behind a still standing tree. When dealing with snipers, it was best not to stay in one position if you intended to keep poking your head up.

Jedd took a gander at the coordinates he got from his buddy, Eric. And no doubt about it, Rick was right. The sniper fire did come from those particular trees. He got his C-14 “Impaler” gauss rifle and sent a rain of 8mm tungsten slugs. The sniper was riddled with bullets and a limb was sheared off, his chest plate resembled Swiss cheese. Jedd admired his handiwork before a K-bolt blew up a tree right beside him.

“Fuck!” he yelled as he ducked behind another tree. More K-bolts descended on his position and in a short moment, his tree was starting to resemble a chewed on pencil. “Jesus! Somebody help!”

“Three snipers left!” hollered Baylor as he jumped behind a large rock. A K-bolt exploded behind him, creating a smoldering and corroding hole on the rock he was using as cover.

“Someone, give me some cover fire!” yelled Jedd, his tree was being brutally mutilated.

Baylor stuck his head out and unleashed a full automatic stream of plasma bolts towards the sniper. The bolts made a noise resembling the rumbling of thunder as it exited the rifle’s barrel. The sniper was distracted and turned to Baylor, sending a K-bolt towards him.

“Gah!” John yelped as the K-bolt blew up the rock he was hiding behind. The force of the blast pushed him backwards into a puddle of mud.

“Sir, are you alright?” Joshua shouted through the intensifying rain. He was a private, first class, a thin guy and an equipments operator.

“Yeah, do me a favor and kill that fucker,” replied Baylor as he checked himself for any injury.

“Yes, sir,” replied Joshua, he fired his weapon, an MBR-24, a gun whose bullets are chemically propelled, much like the ancient 21st century weapons. Spent shells were ejected from the rifle as Joshua fired consecutive three shot bursts. “I can’t hit shit and with the rain, I can’t see shit!”

“Use infrared!” said Baylor as another bolt struck a puddle right beside him. The K-bolt’s acidic residue began to eat through his shoulder pad before the vaporized mud neutralized it. “Shit!”

Joshua turned on the infrared vision and found where the sniper was camping. He took aim and fired a three shot burst. The bullets hit the sniper’s abdomen and the sniper gagged in pain, the bear fell headfirst from the tree, and his neck snapped with a loud thud, although it was muffled by the cascading rain.

“Good shooting,” commented John as another sniper was downed thanks to machinegun fire. “We’ve got one more sniper to go!”

“There he is!” yelled Jedd, pointing to the sniper which was running into the woods. He sent out a quick burst of 8mm tungsten rounds, but trees were now blocking his aim.

“Go, get that sniper!!!” ordered Baylor as he ran after the sniper. They couldn’t afford the sniper to escape and warn the others. “Joshua, did the snipers radio the rest of his unit?”

“No, sir,” replied Joshua as he followed his LT. He rapidly tapped his wrist computer, which was directly linked to the complex sensor equipment sported in his suit.

“Good, let’s keep it that way,” Baylor said as he switched to infrared vision. He followed the heat emissions left by the sniper’s footprints. He gazed to the woods, the sniper was no more than ten meters away from him, but the distance in-between them was increasing slightly. The Bragulans had a slightly superior physique when compared to humans, they originated from a world whose gravity was slightly higher than earth, and hence the bears were shorter and more muscular. He ducked as a branch almost got his head; he leapt over some roots and brushed away some twigs. He ran through a mud puddle and jumped over a fallen tree. The bear was now forty feet away from him. Baylor cursed and fired a few plasma bolts from his rifle. The bear ducked behind a tree as the bolts slammed onto the tee trunk, penetrating deep into the wood before causing a steam explosion. The heat of the bolt caused some nearby leaves to spontaneously combust. The bear peeked from the tree and sent a K-bolt towards Baylor; Baylor tripped on a rock and cursed, he rolled behind a log as the K-bolt exploded on the rock he tripped on.

“Fucker,” Baylor uttered as the bear resumed running.

“Sir, the bear is activating his radio!” said Joshua over the commlink.

“Shit,” cursed Baylor, he looked to the sniper and let out a stream of plasma bolts. The sniper tried to leap out of the way but he had his leg blown off by the bolts. The sniper fell to the ground screaming and howling and in pain he clutched his burnt up stump of a leg.

John stood up and wiped the mud off of his battle suit. The rest of the squad was already surrounding the sniper, who was rolling on the muddy ground in agony. John walked towards the sniper. Blood wasn’t gushing out, his wound was cauterized; the blood vessels burnt closed. Jedd and Eric got the bear and forced him up.

“Where is the rest of your squad?! Where is the rest of your unit?!” shouted John as he slammed the bear against a tree. The bear was muttering incoherently as he stroked his burnt up stump. John tore off the bear’s helmet and gave him a hard slap.

The bear groaned in agony as John gave the bear a hard armored fist to the nose. Greenish blood dripped from the bear’s big flat nose as the cartilage and bone was crushed. The bear spat bloody saliva at John’s visor.

“Son of a bitch! TELL ME!!!” Baylor screamed as he grabbed the bear’s skull and pounded it against the tree trunk. Blood flowed from the bear’s mouth and his head was bleeding severely, but it didn’t matter, Bragulans had an incredible threshold of pain and they took quite a beating, which was all fine for John. “TELL ME!!!”

“No…” the bear mumbled, its face was reduced to a bloody pulp. Under his helmet, John’s face turned red. He took out his pistol and shot the bear’s knee joint, the gun emitted minimal noise thanks to the sound and flash suppressor. The joint was only armored by a flimsy knee pad, a design flaw in the battle suit, the Bragulan Type-55, an all encompassing suit with a self contained environment, NBC protection, a low-tech HUD and several rudimentary vision modes. The bear howled in pain as the teal colored battle suit was stained by dark green blood, inside the knee, the hollow point bullet expanded many times its original dimensions and dealt severe damage to the flesh, arteries, knee cap, cartilage and bone. The bear began to block out.

“Give this fucker some drugs, painkillers. Make sure they won’t make him pass out,” snapped John, evidently pissed off that this interrogation was going nowhere. The medic, Carla, injected a colorless fluid into the bear’s arteries and the bear’s eyes snapped wide open, his muscles tensed and his breathing became rapid and shallow. John aimed at the ankle joint. “Now, tell me, fuckwad!”

The bear shook his head as tears of pain and horror streaked down from his eyes. He heard the Bragulan propaganda brag about how the humans were very soft on their policies, how they were weak, how they made all those rules regarding the treatment of prisoners. There was something about how the torturing of prisoners was illegal and all that gibberish. He knew that this wasn’t truly the case, but he never knew that the humans would be this brutal. The human who was torturing him fired another shot, this time the hollow point entered his ankle and partially severed it. He howled again as blood sprayed out of his joint. He knew that if he were to live, or at least suffer less, he had to give the humans the information they wanted. The bear gave out everything he knew.

Baylor was glad that the interrogation didn’t take too long. The bear was telling the truth, the polygraph validated what the bear said. They gave the bear a large dose of sedatives and left his comatose and lifeless body for dead. Baylor activated his wrist computer and sent an inquiry to Nickerson squad, mere moments later he received Lt. Nickerson’s reply.

“Men, let’s get moving. There’s a Gamma-Sigma squad west of our position. They’ll probably be wondering why their snipers haven’t reported back, so they’ll come to this location. We need to go around them and head for the missile batteries. We’re very near, so we need to catch up with Nickerson squad. I’ve contacted them and they’re already in position, they’re west of the battery and they’re waiting for us to go to our position. Then from there, we will launch a simultaneous assault and take the battery. You all know the drill, so let’s get moving, we hardly have any time left! Double time!”

Very nice - I particularly like the detail about the various military equipment as well as the tense atmosphere during the actual fight...
as well as the nifty idea of "chameleonic" armour. (Even though the idea is anything but realistic)

However, I have a question: Why did they encounter a Bragulan soldier on Daron? Is the situation on Daron a three-party war between the Sovereignty, the Gamma-Sigma and the Bragulans?


BTW - I'm getting tired of using shameless plugs to get read, but almost a week ago I posted the 5th chapter of "The Wormhole War", in case you haven't noticed.

Peregrin Toker wrote:Very nice - I particularly like the detail about the various military equipment as well as the tense atmosphere during the actual fight...
as well as the nifty idea of "chameleonic" armour. (Even though the idea is anything but realistic)

Hmmm... it isn't realistic? To me it seemed like a possible tech which the US military could be using in a few decades.

However, I have a question: Why did they encounter a Bragulan soldier on Daron? Is the situation on Daron a three-party war between the Sovereignty, the Gamma-Sigma and the Bragulans?

Ummm.... the Gamma-Sigma are Bragulans. They might not be BSE troopers, but they belong to the same species. When the troops face BSE guys, I'll call them either BSE soldiers or Bragulan soldiers. It depends, it there are multiple Bragulan factions, then I'll call them G-S/BSE/etc troopers or something.

BTW - I'm getting tired of using shameless plugs to get read, but almost a week ago I posted the 5th chapter of "The Wormhole War", in case you haven't noticed.

You posted a new chapter? Oh... I didn't notice. Didn't see it pop up, and yesterday I spent most of my night asleep with no access to the comp. I'll check it out.... although I might have read that particular chapter while forgetting to post something. Sorry. Don't cry *pats Per on the shoulder*

Shroom Man 777 wrote:

Peregrin Toker wrote:Very nice - I particularly like the detail about the various military equipment as well as the tense atmosphere during the actual fight...
as well as the nifty idea of "chameleonic" armour. (Even though the idea is anything but realistic)

Hmmm... it isn't realistic? To me it seemed like a possible tech which the US military could be using in a few decades.

Well, there's a company which manufactures paint that changes colour dependant on which direction the sun glistens upon it... but that "chameleon paint" alternates between shades of purple, blue, yellow and such colours...

Ummm.... the Gamma-Sigma are Bragulans. They might not be BSE troopers, but they belong to the same species. When the troops face BSE guys, I'll call them either BSE soldiers or Bragulan soldiers. It depends, it there are multiple Bragulan factions, then I'll call them G-S/BSE/etc troopers or something.

But why would Bragulan rebels name themselves after letters in a human alphabet?

Sorry. Don't cry *pats Per on the shoulder*

Don't worry.

[Bart Simpson] I'm getting used... to always being ignored. [/Bart Simpson]

Peregrin Toker wrote: Well, there's a company which manufactures paint that changes colour dependant on which direction the sun glistens upon it... but that "chameleon paint" alternates between shades of purple, blue, yellow and such colours...

Cool, sounds elephantasmic! I'd love to slobber some of that paint in my car.

But why would Bragulan rebels name themselves after letters in a human alphabet?

Ummm.... I never thought much about that. Bah. Who knows.... maybe it sounds cool..... meh. Maybe the original name couldn't be pronounced by your average human joe, so the humans just called them Gamma-Sigma.

[Bart Simpson] I'm getting used... to always being ignored. [/Bart Simpson]

[Homer] Just because I don't care doesn't mean that I don't understand.[/Homer]