working class heroes (adult "humour")

[The Yosemite Bear]

note this is basically scripted with descriptive narration, designes for a comic parody Idea I hace, just the bear sucks at art so instead of stick figures.....)

scene #1 speedlines approching a door labled "employee entrernece"
#2 a red haired clowing crimson eyed woman opens the door with a speed blur still visible.
#3 The red haired woman is shown fully now she's wearing a too tight teeshirt with a picture of the front grill of a large american muscle car, where the lights are positioned on her breasts, next to her is a taller purple haired japanese woman with comic book oversized breasts, wearing a white outfit covered in a spray of red.
(red)<chris>: Yuki your late again, Rich is furious he's may fire you!
Yuki: well fuck, he knew I had my shift over at "Ninja Pizza" you can't very well expect me to be in two places at once. EXPLIOTED WORKER TRANSFORM!!!!!!!
#4 yuki's body fills with light, disintergrating her colothing, and scorching clean her body from the accumulated grunge and pizza gore. the "Explioted worker" song begins to play.*
#5 yuki's body is seen covered in chains, and a slave coller, then the chains turn into her "Highbeams" uniform.
#6. Yuki now goes out to wait tables at her second job, leaving a badly scorched friend behind.
Yuki(from off panal): yes another day in a job I despise just because of my asshole college boyfriend.
Chris: remember no transformations next to your undead friend and roomate, ow, ow, need to buy some aloe for this....


*explioted workier lyrics: Once she was a magic girl, then she met the boy at college, he took her money, her pride, and something else, now she wears the chains of student loans and shame, explioted worker, trapped in a hob she hates.

[The Yosemite Bear]

Dramatis persona

Yuki: former magic girl, who lost all her money when her charming devil ex-boyfriend did something to break her public image clause in her contract. Now saddled with massive college debt, a nearly useless degree (the degree is not useless, just no one takes a 2+ meter tall naturally purple haired, overchested woman seriously in an interview)

Christie: girl from the wrong side of the tracks, but still smart, became a vampire because she thought it would be sexy and fun, plus get to go to all those all night parties. Got booted from college shortly there after for missing too many day classes. also Yuki's only friend and roomate.

Richard: the manager/owner of "Highbeams", status fallen rock god, still living because of that Dorian Grey/Faustian deal he made a long time ago. Notably the most mysogynistic character in the series.

Ember Lighbringer esq: Yuki and Chris' shared devilishly good looking ex-BF, and Richard's Lawyer. Shallow and narrsisstic. Seems this demon boi is probably a mediocare failure amoung the descendants of Lucifer, basically too incompetant, and not smart enough to be really evil. (although he is responsible for ruining Yuki's life.)

Ninja Pizza: established in the city the campaign is set in, during the 1960's the First Generation, were ordered to set up the Pizza Restaurant and Ninja school, and await a mission from the lords of the clan. Still no missions, mostly because despite their closeness to Monopoly Software and Newmedia, they are too valuable to the Ninja clan as a money making enterprise.

The Caffiend: Day and Night manager at Tweakers 24/7 convience store. Although a scary punisher/wolverine like person, he's generally safe if left alone unless your stupid enough to rob him.

Billy Goat: one of the Top daemons of the Ninja Pizza. can transform, summon goats, perform the Star of Choas pizza cut, and generally is a good natured practicionare of black magic.

The Dark Master: Former cook at the Ninja pizza, left there to serve the evil Pizzarat. completly bald with a goatee, he secretly plots to make everyone diabetic/high colesterole, and high blood pressure on behalf of the american pharmacutical companies.

The Drunk: knowns everything, so why does he drink like a fish? because he fucking knows everything including everything that's listed under TMI.

[White Haven]

HEE! Nice litle sketch...course it could just be because I'm a sucker for chains and such

[Lindar]

Cute! More soon please?*curious look*

[The Yosemite Bear]

any suggestions for ninja pizza sloagans?

30 mins or we kill our selves

for the honor of the pizza pie

pizza delivery driver on the road to hell.

[consequences]

any suggestions for ninja pizza sloagans?

30 mins or we kill our selves

for the honor of the pizza pie

pizza delivery driver on the road to hell.

You will honor your franchise. Failure is not an option.

If you haven't seen the Ninja Burger Card game by Steve Jackson Games, you should probably take a serious look.

[The Yosemite Bear]

scene #1 close up of a sad looking Yuki at a bar, Chris slides up to her with a fishbowl glass of dark red liquid.
Chris: your feeling sorry for Ember again arn't you.
Yuki: well he was my boyfriend, and he was so n-
Chris: this is for your own good, you told me to do this anytime you start to feel sorry for that demon.

Scene #2 split panel closeup of Ember, half as a human half as a fallen angel type raven winged demon.
Chris: Ok, let's see damn handsome as a mortal, and adonis greek good in demon form, I can see the attraction, however he's the most lazy and inconsiderate lover I have ever.

Scene #3: Yuki is turning very red, Chris is just going on and draining her fishbowl.
Yuki: How dare you he was the best thing to happen to me.
Chris: Techincally true since he's the only one, but comming from experience he's too self centered and lazy.

Scene #4: Yuki is turning borderline anime demon face bulge, chris puts down her nearly empty fishbowl glass.
Yuki: I sacrificed my Carreer for him!
Chris: listen even tentcle demons are better lovers then him, I should know.
Yuki: You never told me you were raped by demons.
Chris: who said I was raped?

Scene #5 Yuki looks over here shoulder, black thoughts appear above her. Chris is raising her empty fishbowl glass.
Chris: Hey!, a little service here, my O+ margarita is empty!
chris thoughts: Wait that's Ember and twin catgirls I see at that table in the mirror
Scene #6: big close up of Chris, fanged smile
Chris thoughts: This is going to be SO much FUN

[Darth Fanboy]

Chris: listen even tentcle demons are better lovers then him, I should know.
Yuki: You never told me you were raped by demons.
Chris: who said I was raped?

YB Wins!

Heheheheh Very funny.

[The Yosemite Bear]

Scene #1: ninja suited individual peers out a tree at a large building with a "Megasoft and Newz Corp." sign in front of it.
Scente #2: Ninja crossing a tightrope to the roof of "Megasoft"
Scene #3: Ninja drags unconcious security guard into a janitorial closet.
Scene #4: Ninja evades laserbeams placing a box right on the top of a table.
Scene #5: an overwheight man in a buisniness suit sees the box on the table, in the office there's a piece of funky modern art sculpture behind him.
CEO: DAmn, they still got in in less they thirty minutes I guess we'll have to pay them
Scene #6: same scene as before
the modern art sculpture: This time don't insult the honor of the Pizzaria.
CEO: Erm. Ms Watkins make sure to add a 20% tip.

[White Haven]

...I'm liking this universe

[The Yosemite Bear]

Scene 1: Yuki in her red stained chef's outfit, and a ninja, in a kitchen
ninja: ok, they want to know if we can make a "Cheezony Wedge"?
Yuki: well aside from the trademark infingements I could make one, but I don't know why
Scene #2: cloned with eyebulge on the ninja
ninja: So exactly what is it?
Yuki: A wedge shaped, cheese and salted lard calzone that they deepfry and coat with confectionare's sugar. They sell them at Pizza Rat.
Scene #3 the ninja is turning green,.
ninja: that's the most digusting thing I have ever heard what sort of twisted mind create something like that.
Vioce off panel: mommieeee I neeed my Cheeezzzoooony WEDGE!"
Vioce #2 off panel: watch your fucking language, you purple haired slut, My child is present!!! Also make sure there's no MSG in the sauce.
Scene #4: closeup of yuki
Yuki: MSG is Sugar+Salt, now how much sodium and sucrose is in that instant heart attack she just ordered?
Off panal: and Make sure it's a DIET soda!!. now be a dear and get out of the way of mommy's powerchair.
Scene #5 (long panel of a Humaniod Rat in a buisiness suit and a bald guy with a ghoatee.
Bald guy: in addition to cutting our worker's benefits, and getting them all on food stamps, Our sales of Cheezony Wedges are going up, especially with the teen and preteen market share.
The Rat: Good Darkmaster, soon they will all be helpless overwheight little piggies ready for the slaughter, so how's our medical devision's profits on powerchairs and type II diabetic medications?

[The Yosemite Bear]

well the real life cast of Pizza Ninja got some new editions....

Jenny a light brown/dirty blonde from the southern coastal states who insists she's a Pirate Pizza Ninja.

"Wolf": The new boss, who insists that he's "The Pizza Nazi", of course lack of word processors, and health problems kept this comic series under wraps for the last month, so....

[The Yosemite Bear]

panel 1:
A large man with goat horns in a chef's outfit is talking with Yuki, next to a cash register.
Goat: Well just keep it clean, you never know what will happen next
Yuki: yah, yah, anything's better then just being bored with no customers...
Panel 2:
Goat and Yuki are still at the register, scrubbing,
Goat: Watch it, you know what happens when you say that.
Panel 3: a ninja pops in, while their cleaning
Ninja: hey, boss we take phone in orders right, do we take online orders?
Goat: I guess so, Why?
Panel 4: Ninja hands a ream of paper to Goat, Yuki and goat look at it suprised.
Ninja: Good, because a LAN party at Meganewssoft just ordered 300 pies.
Panel five: Goat walks out, Yuki just stands there.
Yuki: let's hope it's FPSers and not RTSers this time.
Goat: Don't say THAT!
Panel six: panel is filled with countless Xenomorph/Tyranid/Zerg rip offs
assembled bug host: RUSH LOL kekekekekekekekekekekkekekekekeke

[Lindar]

nice*grins, applauds* When's Jenny n' Wolf come in?
sorry that i fell behind

[The Yosemite Bear]

nice*grins, applauds* When's Jenny n' Wolf come in?
sorry that i fell behind

Im processing their requests but, need to do work on charqcteizatrion...