MGS: Slytherin Eater
Posted: 2006-10-29 04:03am
Wrote this during summer due to writer's block on Firewarrior's guide. Was playing around with trying writing genres and concept I don't think I'm good at so don't expect much. Got convinced to post it after some nagging.
Tactical Espionage Action
Metal Gear Solid
Slytherin Eater
Prologue: Point of Divergence.
'If I ever take over the world I'm making a law against that kind of bubbly happiness...' The man with the eye patch thought.
"... And then we'll take all of the kids fishing. Jimmy loves that. He always gets some big ones...."
'...With capital punishment. Most definitely capital punishment.'
She was a great aide, no doubt about it. Give her a job and she seemed to do at least twice the paperwork in half the time compared to most the aides he had over the years after being pulled from the field. Fantastic help really.
He rubbed his temples just under his gray hair. She was a great aide and all, but she was always so inhumanly cheerful. The kind of cheer that could drive hardened war veterans insane.
"So... What about you Boss? Got any family?"
Ah finally. This would surely shut her up.
"Well most of them are dead so…" He let it hang, waiting to enjoy the short moment where her smile fell and she said something like 'Oh I'm sorry'. Then awkward silence would follow. Right now awkward silence looked very good.
Unfortunately her mind didn't work by normal, rational rules.
"So who's still alive?" She asked without missing a beat, leaving him speechless for a moment.
'How the hell does she do that?!'
"C'mon. There must be someone."
'I took on a giant nuclear armed rocket propelled tank commanded by a sadistic freak with only an RPG-7, a Chinese spy who's a natural blonde and a motorcycle. I can handle this.' He forced his composure back together.
"Well... Only really two I know off. My Nephew and Niece. Lives in England oddly enough. We... Don't exactly get along. A rather severe… disagreement… with my sisters husband got us off speaking terms. Sister died of cancer some time later which pretty much killed any contact. I think he's dead too by now. They had two kids though"
"Oh... That sucks. Ever tried to patch things up?"
"No, not really, I never really was much for family." When you take on secret world dominating conspiracies, having a family they can use against you is a bad thing. So even if he had wanted to (Last he saw of them wasn't very flattering) it was too great a risk.
However that's all fine and dandy to say to yourself when you are sitting around. It was another thing to say it to this aide.
"You really should you know. Family's the most important thing in the world."
"I'm a bit too busy for it, really."
"Yeah, but Boss, you are old, and will be retiring fairly soon. You don't want to spend the rest of your life alone in some small house somewhere right?"
'Not bloody likely. I'll initiate OH before that. And honestly I'm probably dead soon after by assassination. I just have to put the foundations in place before that so my death doesn't matter.' He couldn't say that out loud though.
"I was hoping to go out in a blaze of glory." He replied instead.
"C'mon! We both know that you are too good to die like that. If you were rolling around in a wheelchair you'd still kick everyone's asses."
Ah hell... Shift topics back pronto! Her hero worship was another annoying thing. Even family was better than that!
"Perhaps I should try to reconciliate. It's been a long time since I saw them. Then again... They probably won't react well to me just coming out of nowhere. Not if they are anything like their father." It was a valid argument. He was a pretty intimidating figure even in his older days, perhaps especially in his older days. Not somebody you wanted to show up on your door step telling you he was an estranged relative wanting to reconciliate, more scars than anyone had a right to have as well as missing an eye.
Unfortunatly she was far from stupid.
"Then pick a special occasion. Do either of them have children?"
"Yeah. My nephew got a son."
"Show up on his birthday bearing gifts. That should make an impression. You probably got several years leave saved up. You only seem to use them for an occasional camping trip after all."
Well that and secret anti-patriot meetings, but he tended just to mention one of them. Still it was true. He had a lot of leave saved up. And it was a quiet period right now. Not much for him to do other than routine administration work.
It still didn't sound like a good idea, but he got the distinct feeling she was going to pester him until he did it. Worst combination: Hero Worship combined with a wish to be as helpful as possible regardless of if you wanted to be helped or not. And frankly he was beginning to think that he could not outwit this irrational girl. She was just too crazy.
Had to look about getting her transferred to psychological warfare.
He did something uncharacteristic. He surrendered.
"Well… I'll take out some leave next birthday his kid has and drop by. I'll give it a try at least."
"Good. Trust me. It will be good for you. Want me to figure out when that birthday is?"
He wasn't sure, but that could be a test to see if he was just paying lip service or not.
"Yes. My Nephew's name is Vernon Dursley, last I remember he lived in the English town of little whinning or something like that, number 4 Privet Drive. Kid should be about seven or eight now."
The man known as Big Boss felt this could work out just fine. Somehow he doubted Vernon would have changed much from when he last saw him in his late teens. It'd confuse the Patriots, keep his aide off his back and give him an excuse to check up on a few friends in the SAS.
Of course just by thinking that he had tempted Murphy.
Tactical Espionage Action
Metal Gear Solid
Slytherin Eater
Prologue: Point of Divergence.
'If I ever take over the world I'm making a law against that kind of bubbly happiness...' The man with the eye patch thought.
"... And then we'll take all of the kids fishing. Jimmy loves that. He always gets some big ones...."
'...With capital punishment. Most definitely capital punishment.'
She was a great aide, no doubt about it. Give her a job and she seemed to do at least twice the paperwork in half the time compared to most the aides he had over the years after being pulled from the field. Fantastic help really.
He rubbed his temples just under his gray hair. She was a great aide and all, but she was always so inhumanly cheerful. The kind of cheer that could drive hardened war veterans insane.
"So... What about you Boss? Got any family?"
Ah finally. This would surely shut her up.
"Well most of them are dead so…" He let it hang, waiting to enjoy the short moment where her smile fell and she said something like 'Oh I'm sorry'. Then awkward silence would follow. Right now awkward silence looked very good.
Unfortunately her mind didn't work by normal, rational rules.
"So who's still alive?" She asked without missing a beat, leaving him speechless for a moment.
'How the hell does she do that?!'
"C'mon. There must be someone."
'I took on a giant nuclear armed rocket propelled tank commanded by a sadistic freak with only an RPG-7, a Chinese spy who's a natural blonde and a motorcycle. I can handle this.' He forced his composure back together.
"Well... Only really two I know off. My Nephew and Niece. Lives in England oddly enough. We... Don't exactly get along. A rather severe… disagreement… with my sisters husband got us off speaking terms. Sister died of cancer some time later which pretty much killed any contact. I think he's dead too by now. They had two kids though"
"Oh... That sucks. Ever tried to patch things up?"
"No, not really, I never really was much for family." When you take on secret world dominating conspiracies, having a family they can use against you is a bad thing. So even if he had wanted to (Last he saw of them wasn't very flattering) it was too great a risk.
However that's all fine and dandy to say to yourself when you are sitting around. It was another thing to say it to this aide.
"You really should you know. Family's the most important thing in the world."
"I'm a bit too busy for it, really."
"Yeah, but Boss, you are old, and will be retiring fairly soon. You don't want to spend the rest of your life alone in some small house somewhere right?"
'Not bloody likely. I'll initiate OH before that. And honestly I'm probably dead soon after by assassination. I just have to put the foundations in place before that so my death doesn't matter.' He couldn't say that out loud though.
"I was hoping to go out in a blaze of glory." He replied instead.
"C'mon! We both know that you are too good to die like that. If you were rolling around in a wheelchair you'd still kick everyone's asses."
Ah hell... Shift topics back pronto! Her hero worship was another annoying thing. Even family was better than that!
"Perhaps I should try to reconciliate. It's been a long time since I saw them. Then again... They probably won't react well to me just coming out of nowhere. Not if they are anything like their father." It was a valid argument. He was a pretty intimidating figure even in his older days, perhaps especially in his older days. Not somebody you wanted to show up on your door step telling you he was an estranged relative wanting to reconciliate, more scars than anyone had a right to have as well as missing an eye.
Unfortunatly she was far from stupid.
"Then pick a special occasion. Do either of them have children?"
"Yeah. My nephew got a son."
"Show up on his birthday bearing gifts. That should make an impression. You probably got several years leave saved up. You only seem to use them for an occasional camping trip after all."
Well that and secret anti-patriot meetings, but he tended just to mention one of them. Still it was true. He had a lot of leave saved up. And it was a quiet period right now. Not much for him to do other than routine administration work.
It still didn't sound like a good idea, but he got the distinct feeling she was going to pester him until he did it. Worst combination: Hero Worship combined with a wish to be as helpful as possible regardless of if you wanted to be helped or not. And frankly he was beginning to think that he could not outwit this irrational girl. She was just too crazy.
Had to look about getting her transferred to psychological warfare.
He did something uncharacteristic. He surrendered.
"Well… I'll take out some leave next birthday his kid has and drop by. I'll give it a try at least."
"Good. Trust me. It will be good for you. Want me to figure out when that birthday is?"
He wasn't sure, but that could be a test to see if he was just paying lip service or not.
"Yes. My Nephew's name is Vernon Dursley, last I remember he lived in the English town of little whinning or something like that, number 4 Privet Drive. Kid should be about seven or eight now."
The man known as Big Boss felt this could work out just fine. Somehow he doubted Vernon would have changed much from when he last saw him in his late teens. It'd confuse the Patriots, keep his aide off his back and give him an excuse to check up on a few friends in the SAS.
Of course just by thinking that he had tempted Murphy.