America Says "NO! to Masturbation"

Laird · Post by **Laird** » 2004-04-19 07:50pm

You American kids better start moving to other countries.

Funny as all hell

yes I realize it is a joke site

Jon · Post by **Jon** » 2004-04-19 08:20pm

I don't know what I'd do without masturbation. I'd have to go see the priest, they like that kinda thing.

The lost Prophet · Post by **The lost Prophet** » 2004-04-19 08:24pm

If you dont masterbate, then your lying. And if you truely aren't masterbating, the you are denying yourself a great pleasure.

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2004-04-19 08:27pm

Much like porn. All men look at porn, and masturbate. If they say they dont, they are not being honest.

Now, the good thing is, this site is satire...

Anarchist Bunny · Post by **Anarchist Bunny** » 2004-04-19 08:28pm

Thats a really old site, I think it's been posted before. Oh well it's blatantly a farce.

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2004-04-19 08:29pm

The lost Prophet wrote:If you dont masterbate, then your lying. And if you truely aren't masterbating, the you are denying yourself a great pleasure.

Or maybe you're getting laid enough that you don't need to masturbate, which nicely describes my current situation. Thanks to my cuddly swimmer chick I have no need to masturbate.

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2004-04-19 08:36pm

Oh get off it(no pun intended) we all know that even when JMac is there you touch yourself at night.

And when she was out of town you probably did what we like to call "angry masturbation" out of sexual frustration.

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2004-04-19 08:40pm

Alyrium Denryle wrote:Oh get off it(no pun intended) we all know that even when JMac is there you touch yourself at night.

Yeah, but only to scratch my nuts.

And when she was out of town you probably did what we like to call "angry masturbation" out of sexual frustration.

Never said I didn't whack off when she was gone, in fact I've mentioned it a few times in the venting threads IIRC...gotta keep my risk of prostate cancer low you know...

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2004-04-19 08:50pm

Yeah, but only to scratch my nuts.

WHy is it that I dont believe you? Horny bastard that you are I am having it difficult to fathom.

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2004-04-19 08:57pm

Alyrium Denryle wrote:WHy is it that I dont believe you? Horny bastard that you are I am having it difficult to fathom.

Because you touch yourself at night?

But seriously, when she's around she takes care of my needs so that I don't have to. Women are just as needy as guys, even more so in my experience.

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2004-04-19 08:59pm

Actually, I dont touch myself at night.. I touch myself in the morning far more often