Eegah!
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- Baron Scarpia
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Eegah!
Last night I watched what might be the most side-splittingly funny MST3K episode, perhaps only behind Manos: Hands of Fate and Space Mutiny for sheer hilarity.
The movie itself is so atrocious that it's hard to imagine how it was made. Arch Hall Sr. seemed to be using it as a vehicle for nepotism, casting his son in the leading man role. A more unsuitable choice could not have been found, since he happends to look like a bleach-blonde Pillsbury Doughboy except with a disgustingly unnatural-looking tan. Worse still, the boy must have had rock star ambitions, judging by the two astoundingly bad songs he "sings" throughout the movie. Ugh.
Anyway, the premise, as if it matters, is that giant Neanderthal Richard Kiel (Yes, Jaws from the Bond films) is still alive in the desert and terrorizes a teenage girl and her father (also played by Hall Sr.) while Hall Jr. wanders the Palm desert searching for them, endlessly shouting out his girlfriend's name ("ROOOOXIEEEEEE!!!"). Trying to describe the full badness of the movie would take forever, but some priceless moments include Roxie's literally squealing "Wheee!" when she's riding around in a dune buggy, her shaving her father when they are captives of Eegah, the father's essentially offering up his daughter to Eegah, the completely unmotivated fistfight in the pool party scene, and, of course, "Watch out for snakes!"
I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir for MST3K fans, but this one is truly priceless.
The movie itself is so atrocious that it's hard to imagine how it was made. Arch Hall Sr. seemed to be using it as a vehicle for nepotism, casting his son in the leading man role. A more unsuitable choice could not have been found, since he happends to look like a bleach-blonde Pillsbury Doughboy except with a disgustingly unnatural-looking tan. Worse still, the boy must have had rock star ambitions, judging by the two astoundingly bad songs he "sings" throughout the movie. Ugh.
Anyway, the premise, as if it matters, is that giant Neanderthal Richard Kiel (Yes, Jaws from the Bond films) is still alive in the desert and terrorizes a teenage girl and her father (also played by Hall Sr.) while Hall Jr. wanders the Palm desert searching for them, endlessly shouting out his girlfriend's name ("ROOOOXIEEEEEE!!!"). Trying to describe the full badness of the movie would take forever, but some priceless moments include Roxie's literally squealing "Wheee!" when she's riding around in a dune buggy, her shaving her father when they are captives of Eegah, the father's essentially offering up his daughter to Eegah, the completely unmotivated fistfight in the pool party scene, and, of course, "Watch out for snakes!"
I'm sure I'm preaching to the choir for MST3K fans, but this one is truly priceless.
I believe in the Holy Trinity: Bach the Father, Beethoven the Son and Brahms the Holy Ghost.
- Oni Koneko Damien
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You're missing some of the best bits, then. There's any number of horrible continuity errors in that schlock of a film. There's the 'watch' scene, where the hand holding the watch does not match *any* of the character's hands on screen at the time. There's the laughable part with the car headlights, where the beam can clearly be seen to be coming from a flashlight offscreen.
Other than that, my favorite scene in the movie is the introduction to the dead relatives. "I am William Burroughs." ... "I, am William Burroughs." ... "*I*, am William Burroughs." ... "I'm Rose Kennedy."
-Damien
Other than that, my favorite scene in the movie is the introduction to the dead relatives. "I am William Burroughs." ... "I, am William Burroughs." ... "*I*, am William Burroughs." ... "I'm Rose Kennedy."
-Damien
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"Phant, quit abusing the He-Wench before he turns you into a caged bitch at a Ren Fair and lets the tourists toss half munched turkey legs at your backside." -Mr. Coffee
Ephemeral Pie: Because not all role-playing has to be shallow.
My art: Because not all DA users are talentless emo twits.
"Phant, quit abusing the He-Wench before he turns you into a caged bitch at a Ren Fair and lets the tourists toss half munched turkey legs at your backside." -Mr. Coffee
- Baron Scarpia
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The DVD had the full movie on the other side, and you could access the scenes they cut during the MST3Ked version.
This has inspired me to seek out those gems of MST3K that everyone must see. I need help compiling the list, though.
So far, the ones I've seen that have had be in stitches include:
Manos, hands of Fate
Space Mutiny (probably my favorite)
Eegah!
Mitchell
Giant Spider Invasion
Kitten With a Whip
Gamora
Radar Patrol (or something like that)
Pretty much every short (though I've not seen the legendary Mr. B Natural)
So what are the other indespensible ones?
This has inspired me to seek out those gems of MST3K that everyone must see. I need help compiling the list, though.
So far, the ones I've seen that have had be in stitches include:
Manos, hands of Fate
Space Mutiny (probably my favorite)
Eegah!
Mitchell
Giant Spider Invasion
Kitten With a Whip
Gamora
Radar Patrol (or something like that)
Pretty much every short (though I've not seen the legendary Mr. B Natural)
So what are the other indespensible ones?
I believe in the Holy Trinity: Bach the Father, Beethoven the Son and Brahms the Holy Ghost.
- Alferd Packer
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Pound for pound, Time of the Apes is my favorite MST3K episode. The Sandy Frank song makes it for me.
"There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance--that principle is contempt prior to investigation." -Herbert Spencer
"Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain." - Schiller, Die Jungfrau von Orleans, III vi.
"Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain." - Schiller, Die Jungfrau von Orleans, III vi.
- Bob the Gunslinger
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Which was the one where the bad guy was a chicken-man named Crankorr? I think it was Prince of Space...
Anyway, that was one of the most hilarious Mike episodes I've ever seen.
"I'm going to bust out a can of jellied whoop-ass all over you!"
Then there's the Joel-era post-armaggedon movie starring "the Paper-Chase guy" and "Jimmy Carter," where a talking motorbike is run-over by an armored garbage truck named "Megaweapon."
Hilarious!
Anyway, that was one of the most hilarious Mike episodes I've ever seen.
"I'm going to bust out a can of jellied whoop-ass all over you!"
Then there's the Joel-era post-armaggedon movie starring "the Paper-Chase guy" and "Jimmy Carter," where a talking motorbike is run-over by an armored garbage truck named "Megaweapon."
Hilarious!
"Gunslinger indeed. Quick draw, Bob. Quick draw." --Count Chocula
"Unquestionably, Dr. Who is MUCH lighter in tone than WH40K. But then, I could argue the entirety of WWII was much lighter in tone than WH40K." --Broomstick
"This is ridiculous. I look like the Games Workshop version of a Jedi Knight." --Harry Dresden, Changes
"Like...are we canonical?" --Aaron Dembski-Bowden to Dan Abnett
"Unquestionably, Dr. Who is MUCH lighter in tone than WH40K. But then, I could argue the entirety of WWII was much lighter in tone than WH40K." --Broomstick
"This is ridiculous. I look like the Games Workshop version of a Jedi Knight." --Harry Dresden, Changes
"Like...are we canonical?" --Aaron Dembski-Bowden to Dan Abnett
- Slartibartfast
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- Spanky The Dolphin
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- Baron Scarpia
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Space Mutiny is probably my favorite as of now. I think that one had the perfect mix of the movie being horrible and the MST3K riffing being spot-on. A lot of people complained that they didn't mention the special effects were ripped from Battlestar Galactica, but does that really matter? I don't think that would have been all that humorous anyway.
Best moments:
The space Disco (jaw-droppingly bad scene)
"Would it help if I said, 'ho ho ho'?"
The dead crew member being in the next scene!
The golf cart chase - "Exceeding speeds of 3!"
"Meat Hardpack!"
The hero screaming like a woman, then calmly turning and jumping out of the cart...
It just goes on!
Best moments:
The space Disco (jaw-droppingly bad scene)
"Would it help if I said, 'ho ho ho'?"
The dead crew member being in the next scene!
The golf cart chase - "Exceeding speeds of 3!"
"Meat Hardpack!"
The hero screaming like a woman, then calmly turning and jumping out of the cart...
It just goes on!
I believe in the Holy Trinity: Bach the Father, Beethoven the Son and Brahms the Holy Ghost.
- Spanky The Dolphin
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Overdrawn at the Memory Bank - It's like having genital surgery with no anaesthetic. Now, people make bald statements like that all the time, but in this case, it's almost literally true. You know how some films date instantly? ODATMB retroactively dated 10 years the instant it hit the can. It makes the contemporaneous episodes of Doctor Who seem like the product of an economic and artistic powerhouse of unattainable proportions.
"Oh, a lesson in not changing history from Mr I'm-My-Own-Grandpa! Let's get the hell out of here already! Screw history!" - Professor Farnsworth
- Slartibartfast
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"Excuse me, have I shown you my butt?"Baron Scarpia wrote:Space Mutiny is probably my favorite as of now. I think that one had the perfect mix of the movie being horrible and the MST3K riffing being spot-on. A lot of people complained that they didn't mention the special effects were ripped from Battlestar Galactica, but does that really matter? I don't think that would have been all that humorous anyway.
Best moments:
The space Disco (jaw-droppingly bad scene)
"Would it help if I said, 'ho ho ho'?"
The dead crew member being in the next scene!
The golf cart chase - "Exceeding speeds of 3!"
"Meat Hardpack!"
The hero screaming like a woman, then calmly turning and jumping out of the cart...
It just goes on!
"Coach says I have to turn in my report!"
Ed Grimley and Lobster Boy!
"Screens and keyboards inside the walls? This must be THE FUTURE!"
- Slartibartfast
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Have you guys seen (even a bit) of that crappy TV movie with the actor from Lois & Clark, that had stolen like every single exploding building and helicopter/car chase from T2? Some people are just shameless.Spanky The Dolphin wrote:I like to think that it was just way too obvious so they didn't even need to comment on it.