Stupid Game Plots

Stark · Post by **Stark** » 2004-04-27 09:59pm

Video game plots don't need the 'idiot factor' injected by the likes of 'energy crystals', 'nuclear accelerants', and the like. So why are they almost always there? I was on Ataris site, reading bout some new games, and plots have this rubbish injected as a matter of course, for no reason. Shadow Ops, for instance; why some farcical piece of ignorance, instead of a *sensible* plot? Is the target audience for these games *really* 12?

Post by **Gandalf** » 2004-04-27 10:08pm

I felt the same way about Perfect Dark.

WTF was that? It felt like the single player mode was just an add on for the multi-player mode.

Stark · Post by **Stark** » 2004-04-27 10:25pm

Gandalf wrote:I felt the same way about Perfect Dark.

WTF was that? It felt like the single player mode was just an add on for the multi-player mode.

Repeat after me - 'the Single Player in Perfect Dark does not exist. Aliens do not exist. The techno-thriller genre has no room for silly crap'

I want PD coverstions for a modern PC engine; that is one of my favourite games. Eat ...erm... shiny chrome assault rifle! I can never remember.

Equinox2003 · Post by **Equinox2003** » 2004-04-27 11:37pm

Speaking of stupid game plots, that reminds me of FF-X2. They give you
a huge load of small 'plots' due to the fact that the 'game plot' was 'thin'
at best.

SAMAS · Post by **SAMAS** » 2004-04-28 11:07am

Well DUH! They already saved the world in X, how are you supposed to top that?

Oni Koneko Damien · Post by **Oni Koneko Damien** » 2004-04-28 02:37pm

And Sonic the Hedgehog. I mean, what kind of fucking plot is that?! A talking *blue* bipedal hedgehog with a total of four rather blunt spikes? Wearing sneakers? Oh, and what of his irradiated friend, that dwarf fox with the bifurcurated spinal column? And the egg-shaped antagonist? I mean, come on, I've written crappy stories but...sheesh!

-Damien

SAMAS · Post by **SAMAS** » 2004-04-28 02:44pm

Oni Koneko Damien wrote:And Sonic the Hedgehog. I mean, what kind of fucking plot is that?! A talking *blue* bipedal hedgehog with a total of four rather blunt spikes? Wearing sneakers? Oh, and what of his irradiated friend, that dwarf fox with the bifurcurated spinal column? And the egg-shaped antagonist? I mean, come on, I've written crappy stories but...sheesh!

-Damien

Those are character designs, not plots.

Anarchist Bunny · Post by **Anarchist Bunny** » 2004-04-28 04:06pm

Thomas Wilde wrote:The Resident Evil tradition of characters being far too
young to have the skills they're supposed to possess continues.
Chris is ex-Air Force *and* an ex-cop at 25; Jill is a munitions
expert, classical pianist, chemist, gunsmith, mechanic, ex-cop,
ex-Delta Force, *and* the god damn Master of Unlocking at 23;
Claire is a demolitions expert, burglar, motorcyclist, locksmith,
and a student of the John Woo school of physically impossible
gunfighting at 19; Rebecca is supposed to be a trained medic
and a member of an elite police unit at 18; and Steve is a
crack pilot, gunman, and can operate seemingly any kind of
heavy machinery at the tender age of 17. Sherry must have
been hiding her *true* power.

Post by **RogueIce** » 2004-04-28 04:40pm

Anarchist Bunny wrote:
Thomas Wilde wrote:The Resident Evil tradition of characters being far too
young to have the skills they're supposed to possess continues.
Chris is ex-Air Force *and* an ex-cop at 25; Jill is a munitions
expert, classical pianist, chemist, gunsmith, mechanic, ex-cop,
ex-Delta Force, *and* the god damn Master of Unlocking at 23;
Claire is a demolitions expert, burglar, motorcyclist, locksmith,
and a student of the John Woo school of physically impossible
gunfighting at 19; Rebecca is supposed to be a trained medic
and a member of an elite police unit at 18; and Steve is a
crack pilot, gunman, and can operate seemingly any kind of
heavy machinery at the tender age of 17. Sherry must have
been hiding her *true* power.

Chris sounds the most realisitic out of the bunch. If you consider "ex-Air Force" as only being in for a four year enlistment and "ex-cop" as only being on the force three years (assuming an almost instant transition from the two jobs). The rest...did they start out at age 12 or something?

Rubberanvil · Post by **Rubberanvil** » 2004-04-28 06:36pm

Oni Koneko Damien wrote:And Sonic the Hedgehog. I mean, what kind of fucking plot is that?! A talking *blue* bipedal hedgehog with a total of four rather blunt spikes? Wearing sneakers? Oh, and what of his irradiated friend, that dwarf fox with the bifurcurated spinal column? And the egg-shaped antagonist? I mean, come on, I've written crappy stories but...sheesh!

Maybe it'll be best you really avoid Sonic porn.

McNum · Post by **McNum** » 2004-04-28 08:11pm

Most game plots are very strange... Personally I like Super Mario's story.
"Two italian plumbers are transported to the Mushroom Kingdom where they must rescue the princess from a giant fire-breating... turtle? On the way they can use Magic Mushrooms and Fire Flowers to increase their powers." Right... Am I the only one that finds the concept of Magic Mushrooms and Fire Flowers a bit suspicious?

Megaman has an ok story, at least in the beginning.
"The evil Dr. Wily has betrayed Dr. Light and turned their Robots to evil. Only one managed to resist (not counting Protoman) and now it is up to Megaman to stop this evil genius." That's all nice and good. However for the next 7 games the plot was "Dr. Wily has escaped from prison and has made new robots to fight for him... again. Megaman must stop Wily at all costs... again."

Most of the good old games have som kind of strange plot. I wish more games were like that now. Viewtiful Joe did something like this. "Your gilfriend has been kidnapped by a movie villain. Go into the movie and use your VFX powers to rescue her!"

I like strange plots like these.

Coaan · Post by **Coaan** » 2004-04-28 08:17pm

Rubberanvil wrote:
Oni Koneko Damien wrote:And Sonic the Hedgehog. I mean, what kind of fucking plot is that?! A talking *blue* bipedal hedgehog with a total of four rather blunt spikes? Wearing sneakers? Oh, and what of his irradiated friend, that dwarf fox with the bifurcurated spinal column? And the egg-shaped antagonist? I mean, come on, I've written crappy stories but...sheesh!
Maybe it'll be best you really avoid Sonic porn.

"Hedgehog'll never be buggered!"

cookie for the referance

Stark · Post by **Stark** » 2004-04-29 01:58am

Anarchist Bunny wrote:
Thomas Wilde wrote:The Resident Evil tradition of characters being far too
young to have the skills they're supposed to possess continues.
Chris is ex-Air Force *and* an ex-cop at 25; Jill is a munitions
expert, classical pianist, chemist, gunsmith, mechanic, ex-cop,
ex-Delta Force, *and* the god damn Master of Unlocking at 23;
Claire is a demolitions expert, burglar, motorcyclist, locksmith,
and a student of the John Woo school of physically impossible
gunfighting at 19; Rebecca is supposed to be a trained medic
and a member of an elite police unit at 18; and Steve is a
crack pilot, gunman, and can operate seemingly any kind of
heavy machinery at the tender age of 17. Sherry must have
been hiding her *true* power.

This is what I'm talking about; not crazy or zany, but stupid and unnecisary. Like otherwise 'sensible' plots, made ridulous nonsense by the inclusion of something really really lame, like RE's 'everyone becomes a zombie but you' thing. Yes, they've fixed it now, after about 10 iterations. Maybe the game won't be Impossible Mission in disguise anymore too

Like SW games always having stupid Dark Side rubbish in it, instead of evil politicians, murderers, corporate greed, stuff like that. Motivations that always stem from 'deadly virus', 'nuclear bomb' and 'aliens' is simply poor.

Slartibartfast · Post by **Slartibartfast** » 2004-04-29 03:54am

Coaan wrote:
Rubberanvil wrote:
Oni Koneko Damien wrote:And Sonic the Hedgehog. I mean, what kind of fucking plot is that?! A talking *blue* bipedal hedgehog with a total of four rather blunt spikes? Wearing sneakers? Oh, and what of his irradiated friend, that dwarf fox with the bifurcurated spinal column? And the egg-shaped antagonist? I mean, come on, I've written crappy stories but...sheesh!
Maybe it'll be best you really avoid Sonic porn.
"Hedgehog'll never be buggered!"

cookie for the referance

Hedgehog Song
"...you can do it with snail if you slow to a crawl
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all"

Mayabird · Post by **Mayabird** » 2004-04-29 12:34pm

When you think about it, though, MOST game plots are kinda stupid/unnecessary/silly/whatever. Same with most movies, TV shows, and so on. They're also repetitive. "Some evil badguy/aliens/zombies/tribble-variants/bugs/robots are going to take over/destroy the world. So save the world!"

So what? If it's a fun game I don't care that it's about two Italian plumbers rescuing a princess, some gorillas seeking out their banana horde, or everything else that looks really silly when you think about it for a minute. I don't play games to recreate the drudgery of my boring existance. I want to play games with lots of color and excitement and weird crap. Maybe I just have a strong suspension of disbelief ability, I don't know.

But those ages for the Resident Evil characters ARE still ridiculously low.

Xon · Post by **Xon** » 2004-04-29 01:09pm

There is always Total Annihilation's "story"

Bugsby · Post by **Bugsby** » 2004-04-30 01:40am

I hereby propose Bugsby's Law of Plot Importance:

The quality of the plot of a video-game must be proportional to the degree to which the game relies on its plot.

Mario doesnt need a good plot because it doesnt have one. Something like Final Fantasy needs a good plot because it is very plot dirven (thankfully the plot of FF is [almost] always good). Something that is plot driven but doesnt pay any attention to plot at all should die.

frigidmagi · Post by **frigidmagi** » 2004-04-30 01:52am

I agree with Bugsby's Law of Port Importance, along with the purposed penalty.

Yes, FF usually gives us a decent plot.

Anhaga · Post by **Anhaga** » 2004-04-30 02:34am

Slartibartfast wrote:
Coaan wrote: "Hedgehog'll never be buggered!"

cookie for the referance
Hedgehog Song
"...you can do it with snail if you slow to a crawl
but the hedgehog can never be buggered at all"

"...You can bugger the dog- he will come when you call
But the hedgehog can never be buggered at all"

Sarevok · Post by **Sarevok** » 2004-04-30 02:51am

Most game plots are stupid. Game developers conecntrate more on gamepla than stories. Some games do have good plausible plots. For example Bridgecommander had a good story that almost resebles a good trek show.

18-Till-I-Die · Post by **18-Till-I-Die** » 2004-04-30 05:18am

Hell, it's a game. As long as the controls are tight and the graphics kick ass, i could care less what the hell i'm doin, just tell me what button to push to shoot the guy.

BTW, i'm an FPS fan, so nearly every game i own from Space Bunnies Must Die to Final Doom involve me shooting someone for a strange reason. But who cares, it kicks ass, and since it's entertainment, that is really ALL, that should matter. I also own Sonic 3 (the best one of the series

) and Mech Assault and Robot Alchemic Drive. So i'm not obsessed with shooting at least.

General Zod · Post by **General Zod** » 2004-04-30 11:29am

[old timer rant] back in my time we didn't need this fancy convolutin plotline stuff! we had a joystick, two trigger buttons and we liked it! When ya beat the game the high score was reward in' itself, now you people all expect plotlines! plotlines, plotlines, plotlines! bah![/old timer rant]

seriously though, the plotline concept is still relatively new, considering that for a long time the only point of a game was to get the high score. With the exception of a handful of genres, involving plots aren't really needed. Who ever heard of a serious plotline needed in a game where the point is to shoot badguys and defeat the boss? Not really something that's needed so long as they game itself is fun.