Guri vs. Data...with a twist :twisted:

OT: anything goes!

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Kelly Antilles
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Post by Kelly Antilles »

Stormbringer wrote:But we have you. And last time, I checked you were female and flirting. So there!
I never heard you complain.
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Post by Stormbringer »

Kelly Antilles wrote:
Stormbringer wrote:But we have you. And last time, I checked you were female and flirting. So there!
I never heard you complain.
Why the hell would I? I'm enjoying it.

I was mearly pointing out that Lagomaster is flirting with a woman. So he'd better be careful so he doesn't get his man parts flambed.
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Kelly Antilles
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Post by Kelly Antilles »

Stormbringer wrote:
Kelly Antilles wrote:
Stormbringer wrote:But we have you. And last time, I checked you were female and flirting. So there!
I never heard you complain.
Why the hell would I? I'm enjoying it.

I was mearly pointing out that Lagomaster is flirting with a woman. So he'd better be careful so he doesn't get his man parts flambed.
I don't remember Lag flirting. Did I just miss it? ;)
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Post by Stormbringer »

Kelly Antilles wrote:
Stormbringer wrote: Why the hell would I? I'm enjoying it.

I was mearly pointing out that Lagomaster is flirting with a woman. So he'd better be careful so he doesn't get his man parts flambed.
I don't remember Lag flirting. Did I just miss it? ;)
True, but then again it's possible we both missed the attempt. He did say he wasn't very good at it.
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Post by Lagmonster »

Stormbringer wrote:
Kelly Antilles wrote:I don't remember Lag flirting. Did I just miss it? ;)
True, but then again it's possible we both missed the attempt. He did say he wasn't very good at it.
I was flirting? Hey, I think *I* missed it! I should have captured the moment for posterity!
Note: I'm semi-retired from the board, so if you need something, please be patient.
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Post by Stormbringer »

Lagmonster wrote:
Stormbringer wrote:
Kelly Antilles wrote:I don't remember Lag flirting. Did I just miss it? ;)
True, but then again it's possible we both missed the attempt. He did say he wasn't very good at it.
I was flirting? Hey, I think *I* missed it! I should have captured the moment for posterity!
Well, you're either the master of subtlety or not flirting with kelly.
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Post by Lagmonster »

Stormbringer wrote:Well, you're either the master of subtlety or not flirting with kelly.
I'll go with the latter. Remember the aforementioned crotch-fires?
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Post by Stormbringer »

Lagmonster wrote:
Stormbringer wrote:Well, you're either the master of subtlety or not flirting with kelly.
I'll go with the latter. Remember the aforementioned crotch-fires?
Yeah, thanks for reminding me of that. <pardon me while I cringe from the imagined pain now>
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Kelly Antilles
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Post by Kelly Antilles »

The Five Secrets to a Great Relationship:

1. It is important to find a man who works around the house, occasionally cooks and cleans, and who has a job.

2. It is important to find a man who makes you laugh.

3. It is important to find a man who is dependable and doesn't lie.

4. It is important to find a man who's good in bed and who loves to have sex with you.

5. It is important that these four men never meet.
Now that is my idea of a perfect relationship. ;)
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Post by Stormbringer »

Kelly Antilles wrote:
The Five Secrets to a Great Relationship:

1. It is important to find a man who works around the house, occasionally cooks and cleans, and who has a job.

2. It is important to find a man who makes you laugh.

3. It is important to find a man who is dependable and doesn't lie.

4. It is important to find a man who's good in bed and who loves to have sex with you.

5. It is important that these four men never meet.
Now that is my idea of a perfect relationship. ;)
That's a good one.
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Post by Lagmonster »

Kelly Antilles wrote:Now that is my idea of a perfect relationship. ;)
My wife has come up with the cunning tactic of, whenever someone asks her why she chose me, saying, "Who wouldn't?". This keeps me happy and docile most of the time.
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Post by Ted »

Lagmonster wrote:
Stormbringer wrote:
Kelly Antilles wrote:That's when you have to explain "honey, the majority of the guys who post here are hormonal teenagers. Pay them no mind."
But we have you. And last time, I checked you were female and flirting. So there!
She's lucky she *can* flirt. I was apparently born without a Flirt Gland or something. My female-male interaction sounds like the Homer-double in that 'Mr.X' episode of The Simpsons: "Ve vill go out to a medium-price restaurant and zen come back for a night of efficient German sex."
It's cause you're in the capital man, living around there's gotta do that to someone.
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That here, obedient to their laws, we lie.
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Post by Stormbringer »

Lagmonster wrote:
Kelly Antilles wrote:Now that is my idea of a perfect relationship. ;)
My wife has come up with the cunning tactic of, whenever someone asks her why she chose me, saying, "Who wouldn't?". This keeps me happy and docile most of the time.
I can practically hear the whip cracking over here in the US of A.
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Post by Lagmonster »

Stormbringer wrote:I can practically hear the whip cracking over here in the US of A.
I worry that you're right. She's a 5'8 French lady. I'm a 6'4 German. There's no other explanation I can think of! Gah!
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Post by Stormbringer »

Lagmonster wrote:
Stormbringer wrote:I can practically hear the whip cracking over here in the US of A.
I worry that you're right. She's a 5'8 French lady. I'm a 6'4 German. There's no other explanation I can think of! Gah!
Wait, you're german she french. And she's winning? that seems so unatural.
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Post by Ted »

Lagmonster wrote:
Stormbringer wrote:I can practically hear the whip cracking over here in the US of A.
I worry that you're right. She's a 5'8 French lady. I'm a 6'4 German. There's no other explanation I can think of! Gah!
Man you screwed yourself bigtime.
A Gerry marrying a frog?
It's unheard of!
Go, tell the Spartans, stranger passing by,
That here, obedient to their laws, we lie.
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Post by Kelly Antilles »

Part 1 of the porno fanfic is up in the fanfic forum.
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Post by Kuja »

And it's goooooooood!
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JADAFETWA
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Post by Stormbringer »

IG-88E wrote:And it's goooooooood!
Hell yeah. I got a sneak preview. I want more!
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Post by Ted »

Get enough on hand experience to help you Kelly? :wink:

LOL


j/k
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Post by CmdrWilkens »

Lagmonster wrote:
Stormbringer wrote:
Kelly Antilles wrote:That's when you have to explain "honey, the majority of the guys who post here are hormonal teenagers. Pay them no mind."
But we have you. And last time, I checked you were female and flirting. So there!
She's lucky she *can* flirt. I was apparently born without a Flirt Gland or something. My female-male interaction sounds like the Homer-double in that 'Mr.X' episode of The Simpsons: "Ve vill go out to a medium-price restaurant and zen come back for a night of efficient German sex."
But everyone loves efficient German sex.
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Post by CmdrWilkens »

Kelly Antilles wrote:Part 1 of the porno fanfic is up in the fanfic forum.
Which will probably mark the only thing that half the guys here would notice for the next...fifteen minutes.
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"I put no stock in religion. By the word religion I have seen the lunacy of fanatics of every denomination be called the will of god. I have seen too much religion in the eyes of too many murderers. Holiness is in right action, and courage on behalf of those who cannot defend themselves, and goodness. "
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Post by Ted »

CmdrWilkens wrote:
Kelly Antilles wrote:Part 1 of the porno fanfic is up in the fanfic forum.
Which will probably mark the only thing that half the guys here would notice for the next...fifteen minutes.
True that.
Go, tell the Spartans, stranger passing by,
That here, obedient to their laws, we lie.
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Post by Stormbringer »

CmdrWilkens wrote:
Kelly Antilles wrote:Part 1 of the porno fanfic is up in the fanfic forum.
Which will probably mark the only thing that half the guys here would notice for the next...fifteen minutes.
I'd say it'd be a lot closer to a half hour.
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Post by Bug-Eyed Earl »

/Well, I only read the first two pages, so by now we're all probably off topic.

DATA: Uhhh... I am indeed capable of multiple forms of pleasure...

GURI: And how often do you get to se them?

DATA:(switches off emotion chip, and fight begins)

If Data could not switch oiff his emotion chip, I say he could resist her. I kind of resent the notion that men can NEVER turn down sex if offered to them. If Guri was a known enemy of the Federation, most likely he could resist.

I have no idea how strong Data is, but I remember from SOTE Guri killed people by putting them in a chomke hold. I can't remember if their necks got broken, but I remeber that he rvictims struggled a bit before succumbing. From what I have seen, Data might be anywhere from a little to a lot stronger than that. The problem is people forget how strong he is because henever uses his strength, and even I only vaguely remember various feats of strength he has demonstrated. In Wong's fic, which was so meticulously researched, it can be considered the final word on the subject when he kills a stormtrooper with a punch to the ribcage. If Wong acknowledges that data can kick ass, I suppose we should too.
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