Troy: My Review

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2004-05-14 03:51am

So overall, the film averages out to like 3.7/5?

Post by **Vympel** » 2004-05-14 03:57am

Meh ... fair enough.

I was hoping to see Orlando Bloom get skewered by Philoctetes bow (that originally belonged to Hercules, but oh well ...)

Crown · Post by **Crown** » 2004-05-14 03:58am

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:So overall, the film averages out to like 3.7/5?

Yep, that's about fair. I just rounded up to the nearest 0.5, on the basis that the majority of the population hasn't read Homer's work to be accurate judges of.

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2004-05-14 07:00am

Also Agamemnon is turned into a 1 dimensional, raving lunatic and general from the back lines, which if we all studied our ancient Grecko-Roman history, we would know that this didn't really start happening til Caesar's time (you know 1100 odd years after Troy). ...

What? Arg! What are the weapons like? Bronze, all of them, right? Predominantly spears, few or no swords, plus chariots, short bows, that sort of thing, right? Little to no armor?

CRUCIBLE · Post by **CRUCIBLE** » 2004-05-14 05:57pm

HemlockGrey wrote: What? Arg! What are the weapons like? Bronze, all of them, right? Predominantly spears, few or no swords, plus chariots, short bows, that sort of thing, right? Little to no armor?

Yep exactly!

Btw, wasnt the arrow, which hit Achilles in the heel, poisoned? Thats at least what stayed in MY memory. But dunno if the translation/recapitulation of the book i read some years ago was right.

Stravo · Post by **Stravo** » 2004-05-15 12:21am

Just came back from seeing it and it was great. A wonderful way to forget a stressful last few months and watching Achilles in action is just awesome. I like what the writers and director did, sort of explaining away the mythology by subsitituing real world explanations that seem mythical. For example Achilles was said to be invulnerable save for his heel, in the movie they explain this by showing that he was such an awesome fighter that he could not be touched, hence he was invulnerable from a certain point of view.

Paris was a snivelling little shit but Banna was impressive as Hector and you really felt sorry for him when Achilles shows up to call him out.

It was nice to see Sean Bean as Oddyseus and the hint of a sequel at the end that made most of the audience chuckle.

The battle scenes were incredibly done and exciting. I was really annoyed with the throw away Achilles love subplot and what they did with Agamemnon. Overall the movie is a great popcorn film.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2004-05-15 12:37am

Just got back from seeing it. Pretty good, overall.

Diane Kruger's ass is a 13 out of 10.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2004-05-15 12:52am

I was a bit disappointed with Agamemnon's death, though. I was kind of looking forward to him going down like a punk in a bathtub when he least expected it.

Even better, they could have had a statue of Achilles looking down at him, to fulfill Achilles' promise to look upon Agamemnon's corpse.

jairyn_1 · Post by **jairyn_1** » 2004-05-15 12:59am

Cinematography was excellent.
Music was pretty good.
Acting was decent.

Overall, I liked it, but was kind of disappointed. 3/5.

The Kernel · Post by **The Kernel** » 2004-05-15 01:36am

They killed Agamemnon AND they turned it into a love story between Achilles and Brisius. I don't know what it is about movies these days, but aparently heroes are only allowed to treat women with 21st Century sexual morality instead of as the slaves and war brides they were.

Aside from that though it was quite good. The casting was great (especially Odysseius and Hektor), the battle scenes were more than serviceable and they remained remarkably true to the Homer story for about 90% of it, aside from leaving the Gods out (not as big a problem as one might think).

I'd give it 3/4 stars and my personal thumbs up, although it would have been a lot better if it didn't pander to modern morality.

Rubberanvil · Post by **Rubberanvil** » 2004-05-15 01:50am

CRUCIBLE wrote: Btw, wasnt the arrow, which hit Achilles in the heel, poisoned? Thats at least what stayed in MY memory. But dunno if the translation/recapitulation of the book i read some years ago was right.

Every version of the Troy I've read, Paris did use a posion arrow to kill Achilles.

I'm guessing his [Achilles] son wasn't mentioned in the movie?

Crayz9000 · Post by **Crayz9000** » 2004-05-15 02:59am

Rubberanvil wrote:I'm guessing his [Achilles] son wasn't mentioned in the movie?

Passing mention. Achilles' mother basically tells him that he has two options (this is before they set sail): either he stays home, lives life with his wife and watches his son grow, or goes off to Troy for glory and immortality.

Mark S · Post by **Mark S** » 2004-05-15 08:21am

Where was Ajax the Lesser!!! Ajax the Lesser!!!

Crown · Post by **Crown** » 2004-05-15 08:35am

Mark S wrote:Where was Ajax the Lesser!!! Ajax the Lesser!!!

I asked the same thing!

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2004-05-15 02:18pm

What about the Ajax that was in the movie?

Or was that some other Ajax?

Mark S · Post by **Mark S** » 2004-05-15 04:55pm

neoolong wrote:What about the Ajax that was in the movie?

Or was that some other Ajax?

That was Ajax the Greater (because he was so big). The Illiad has two kings named Ajax, the Greater, seen in the movie, and the Lesser who was shorter and somewhat longer lived (I think) in the battles.

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2004-05-15 05:33pm

You could pull an EU and just build a backstory on some unnamed soldier.

"See that guy on the left, that one is Ajax the Lesser."

"And that one over there is Ajax the Just Right."

Post by **haas mark** » 2004-05-15 05:36pm

neoolong wrote:You could pull an EU and just build a backstory on some unnamed soldier.

"See that guy on the left, that one is Ajax the Lesser."

"And that one over there is Ajax the Just Right."

Am suddenly reminded of Goldilocks... heh.

18-Till-I-Die · Post by **18-Till-I-Die** » 2004-05-15 07:24pm

I saw it today. The battles wer all incredible, i really liked the fight scenes. Helen was hot, so was that temple virgin chick, and the dialogue was well done.

A few problems: Having read the original story, i felt leaving out the (extremely prevelent) effects of the Gods in the story was stupid, seriously the ancient Greek world was lousy with Gods and Monsters and all kinds of other magical shit, and here we see not Olympian one. What the fuck

Achilles should've died from the arrow instantly, IMO, and they should've playe dup his invulnerability. I wouldve loved, just oncem, to see a few arrows bouncing off his hide or a spear shattering when it hits him or a sword buckling from a stab at his heart.

Finally, i just LOVED Agamemnon. Brian Cox did the best job playing a son of a bitch than i've ever seen, and i've seen Barney: Reloaded. And i cant really take more than a half star away, cause i genuinely enjoyed it.

Overall: ****1/2 out of five, i recamend it.

Mark S · Post by **Mark S** » 2004-05-15 08:06pm

I think they were purposely trying to play down his invulnerability, weren't they? In the beginning the kid asks if the stories are true and if he's really invincible and Achilles says something like, "Than I wouldn't need the shield, would I."

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2004-05-15 08:36pm

The movie was trying to be realistic, as in not showing anything really supernatural.

Can't really have a real live nigh invincible hero in that case.

EmperorSolo51 · Post by **EmperorSolo51** » 2004-05-15 09:39pm

Just saw it and It was okay. However, they did miss some key parts from the tale of Homer. One of which is when Menelaus has his daughter sacrificed to the gods so he can have a favorable wind for the Mycenean fleet. There also the the part where Achilles Takes Hector's head off his body and drags it around the Greek camp in celebration. They also totally ignored Cassandra and her abilities of prophecy that nobody in Troy would believe. Odyseus did not get the idea for building a horse from a greek soldier carving a wooden horse. In fact it came to him in a dream from the goddess Athena. I felt it was stupid for the writers not to include the gods in the movie. Don't get me wrong I loved the fighting and the acting, but, they should have included the gods as it is integral to the story of the Illiad and the Odessy.

The length of the war felt as if it only lasted a couple months not the 10 years that Homer wrote about.

Crown · Post by **Crown** » 2004-05-15 11:27pm

From all the interviews I have seen about it, the film makers agreed that they condensed the war to a few weeks...

The Kernel · Post by **The Kernel** » 2004-05-15 11:41pm

Crown wrote:From all the interviews I have seen about it, the film makers agreed that they condensed the war to a few weeks...

Which only makes sense, as a movie that stretches for years would be too difficult for most of the audience to handle. Besides, they actually did get in most of the important plot elements even in so short a period of time.

Stuart Mackey · Post by **Stuart Mackey** » 2004-05-15 11:54pm

I have but one question..did they get the Phalanx right? or was it just a stupid unrelistic rehash of the Braveheart battles {ie no schiltrons?} with lots of men just running at each other?