Damn Activist Fire Departments

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2004-07-15 07:14pm

CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa (AP) -- A church's plan for an old-fashioned book-burning has been thwarted by city and county fire codes.

Preachers and congregations throughout American history have built bonfires and tossed in books and other materials they believed offended God.

The Rev. Scott Breedlove, pastor of The Jesus Church, wanted to rekindle that tradition in a July 28 ceremony where books, CDs, videos and clothing would have been thrown into the flames.

Not so fast, city officials said.

"We don't want a situation where people are burning rubbish as a recreational fire," said Brad Brenneman, the fire department's district chief.

Linn County won't go for a fire outside city limits, either.

Officials said the county's air quality division prohibits the transporting of materials from the city to the county for burning.

Breedlove said a city fire inspector suggested shredding the offending material, but Breedlove said that wouldn't seem biblical.

"I joked with the guy that St. Paul never had to worry about fire codes," Breedlove said.

The new plan calls for members of the church to throw materials into garbage cans and then light candles to symbolically "burn" the material.

It looks like once again those unelected liberal fire departments are stomping on the rights of the poor Christians. What is America coming to?

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2004-07-15 07:23pm

Give them some time, if flag burning can be protected by the constitution (and thus not subject to these pesky environmental laws) then I'm sure enough money can be found and thrown at lawyers and lobbyist to get book burning declared protected speech or at least given a written in exception into the law.

Xenophobe3691 · Post by **Xenophobe3691** » 2004-07-15 07:42pm

Well, the problem wasn't the material so much that they were burning it, air quality control told them they couldn't. Maybe if they shredded it or something and used it for fertilizer, but that would be too much like mixing "Learning nourishes us all" with "You are shit to us!"...Sort of a "Shit nourishes you!" Message.

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2004-07-15 08:14pm

Hmm... Were they going to be wearing SS uniforms?

I swear if a church ever has a book-burning here, I will buy all the bibles in the areas christian book stores, and the LDS churches stockpiles, pile them up, apply lighter fluid, and play Deutschland Uber Alles while roasting marshmellows across the street from their own conflagration.

Xenophobe3691 · Post by **Xenophobe3691** » 2004-07-15 08:18pm

Alyrium Denryle wrote:Hmm... Were they going to be wearing SS uniforms?

I swear if a church ever has a book-burning here, I will buy all the bibles in the areas christian book stores, and the LDS churches stockpiles, pile them up, apply lighter fluid, and play Deutschland Uber Alles while roasting marshmellows across the street from their own conflagration.

PLEASE, invite me, I'll pay for Plane fare and bring my own stock...

Spice Runner · Post by **Spice Runner** » 2004-07-15 10:02pm

Why are they burning said items? What do they hope to achieve by this?

TrailerParkJawa · Post by **TrailerParkJawa** » 2004-07-15 10:42pm

Sea Skimmer wrote:Give them some time, if flag burning can be protected by the constitution (and thus not subject to these pesky environmental laws) then I'm sure enough money can be found and thrown at lawyers and lobbyist to get book burning declared protected speech or at least given a written in exception into the law.

I think it has more to due with the quantity being burned. While you can legally burn a flag in protest I bet you'd not be allowed to burn 2 tons of flags in a big pile.

If they church wanted to burn a book in protest I think they might have been left alone.

As for CD's I don't think that is good idea to be burning!

Morilore · Post by **Morilore** » 2004-07-15 11:22pm

Here's a different idea: sneak in to the party, and then all of a sudden throw a Bible in the fire, so everyone can see it. Then run like hell.

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2004-07-15 11:27pm

Xenophobe3691 wrote:
Alyrium Denryle wrote:Hmm... Were they going to be wearing SS uniforms?

I swear if a church ever has a book-burning here, I will buy all the bibles in the areas christian book stores, and the LDS churches stockpiles, pile them up, apply lighter fluid, and play Deutschland Uber Alles while roasting marshmellows across the street from their own conflagration.
PLEASE, invite me, I'll pay for Plane fare and bring my own stock...

If it ever happens, you are first on my list. Hell, I have friends who would gladly goostep down the street under such cirumstances

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2004-07-15 11:30pm

Morilore wrote:Here's a different idea: sneak in to the party, and then all of a sudden throw a Bible in the fire, so everyone can see it. Then run like hell.

Or you walk up in SS uniform look-alikes, give the fascist salute

Heil Jesus! and toss books into the fire.

Rogue 9 · Post by **Rogue 9** » 2004-07-16 12:02am

Alyrium Denryle wrote:Hmm... Were they going to be wearing SS uniforms?

I swear if a church ever has a book-burning here, I will buy all the bibles in the areas christian book stores, and the LDS churches stockpiles, pile them up, apply lighter fluid, and play Deutschland Uber Alles while roasting marshmellows across the street from their own conflagration.

And I'll come, yell at both sides of the thing, and then, since I'm a nice guy, I'll haul you down to the emergency room for the treatment you will need after you poison yourself eating food smoked in binding glue and printing ink.

White Cat · Post by **White Cat** » 2004-07-16 12:34am

TrailerParkJawa wrote:As for CD's I don't think that is good idea to be burning!

I saw someone throw some CD's into a campfire once. They just shriveled up into a little silver blob. Looked kinda neat, actually.

Rogue 9 · Post by **Rogue 9** » 2004-07-16 12:37am

White Cat wrote:
TrailerParkJawa wrote:As for CD's I don't think that is good idea to be burning!
I saw someone throw some CD's into a campfire once. They just shriveled up into a little silver blob. Looked kinda neat, actually.

That's the CD melting. Then it starts to burn. And you get gaseous burned plastic stuff in the smoke, which is not the best stuff to breathe or to have smoked into the hot dogs.

Mayabird · Post by **Mayabird** » 2004-07-16 01:57am

That ending just sounds so silly.

Fire Inspector: "You know, if you're that obsessed with destruction you could just SHRED the books."

Preacher: "But...but...they're not in the Bible! There must be fire! Screw it, we're burning some candles."

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2004-07-16 02:10am

Rogue 9 wrote:
Alyrium Denryle wrote:Hmm... Were they going to be wearing SS uniforms?

I swear if a church ever has a book-burning here, I will buy all the bibles in the areas christian book stores, and the LDS churches stockpiles, pile them up, apply lighter fluid, and play Deutschland Uber Alles while roasting marshmellows across the street from their own conflagration.
And I'll come, yell at both sides of the thing, and then, since I'm a nice guy, I'll haul you down to the emergency room for the treatment you will need after you poison yourself eating food smoked in binding glue and printing ink.

WHo said I would eat them? Just roast them... casually... while singing Panzerleid at the top of my lungs.

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2004-07-16 09:47am

Wow, that's pretty bad- WAIT, IS THAT WHERE I FUCKING SAYS IT IS?!

I'm almost tempted to find out where that place is, and... I don't know, suggestions for legal ways to antagonise, anyone?

LordShaithis · Post by **LordShaithis** » 2004-07-16 11:22am

Alyrium Denryle wrote:Or you walk up in SS uniform look-alikes, give the fascist salute

Heil Jesus! and toss books into the fire.

Ahahaha! That's the best idea here.

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2004-07-16 11:32am

DPDarkPrimus wrote:Wow, that's pretty bad- WAIT, IS THAT WHERE I FUCKING SAYS IT IS?!

I'm almost tempted to find out where that place is, and... I don't know, suggestions for legal ways to antagonise, anyone?

While they are doing the whole candle thing, walk up in an SS uniform and do the "symbolic burning" with them. Saying things like "Heil Jehovah" "I hate Jews, dont you?"

Darth Raptor · Post by **Darth Raptor** » 2004-07-16 02:00pm

I'd like to know exactly what they're burning. Any book that offends God deserves a good read. The music must be good too.

And I didn't know CR had such hardcore churches. Well, color me unsurprised. I just thought of it as more of a rural thing.

Arthur_Tuxedo · Post by **Arthur_Tuxedo** » 2004-07-16 03:53pm

neel wrote:Why are they burning said items? What do they hope to achieve by this?

My guess is it's a nice public demonstration to let unbelievers know they're not welcome without actually having to come out and say it.

Bob the Gunslinger · Post by **Bob the Gunslinger** » 2004-07-16 04:22pm

I bet you'll all feel like jerks once the church announces that they were burning the complete works of Kevin J. Anderson...

SirNitram · Post by **SirNitram** » 2004-07-16 04:31pm

Bob the Gunslinger wrote:I bet you'll all feel like jerks once the church announces that they were burning the complete works of Kevin J. Anderson...

Fire is a holy force, which dates back to when Mankind first defied the Gods and brought light into dark places. It should not be sullied with KJA...

CJvR · Post by **CJvR** » 2004-07-16 04:54pm

Cool!

Come taste a divine Bratwurst! BBQed over a genuine bible bonfire...

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2004-07-16 07:10pm

Alyrium Denryle wrote:
DPDarkPrimus wrote:Wow, that's pretty bad- WAIT, IS THAT WHERE I FUCKING SAYS IT IS?!

I'm almost tempted to find out where that place is, and... I don't know, suggestions for legal ways to antagonise, anyone?
While they are doing the whole candle thing, walk up in an SS uniform and do the "symbolic burning" with them. Saying things like "Heil Jehovah" "I hate Jews, dont you?"

If I had an SS uniform, I'd do it.

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2004-07-16 07:11pm

Lazy Raptor wrote: And I didn't know CR had such hardcore churches. Well, color me unsurprised. I just thought of it as more of a rural thing.

"CR"? Are you a local or something?