Hi, I'm Mark Berger...

Iceberg · Post by **Iceberg** » 2004-08-09 11:19pm

And I will be running for the position of United States Representative for the State of Minnesota (district yet to be determined) in 2006 as a member of the Democratic-Farmer-Labor Party.

My personal stances are (revisions pending)

Agriculture: As the grandson of a dairy farmer, I know how essential farms are to the state of Minnesota. I will fight against free government handouts to wealthy agricultural corporations and for expansion of assistance to family farmers.

Education: A free, world-class public education is the right of every American. If elected, I will fight for increased funding and assistance to magnet schools, which have a proven track record of success and are a highly viable alternative to giving away our nation's education system to profit motivated corporations. I will work hard to make higher education accessible to every American through expansions of the Federal Stafford and Perkins Loan Programs. And I will work to help rebuild public schools in Minnesota and in other states to bring America's educational standards back in line with the industrialized world.

Hunting and Fishing: Hunting is a sport that we as Minnesotans frequently find as a way of survival in the long winter months. As a U.S. Representative, I will fight to keep East Coast gun control standards from being imposed on Minnesotans, so that we can continue to enjoy our state's natural resources in all ways. I will also work to improve the already good condition of Minnesota lakes and streams, to preserve the sport and art of fishing for Minnesotans for generations to come.

War on Terror: The War on Terror, as being fought by the Bush Administration, is a failure. Constant antagonism with traditional American allies have forced our nation to align itself with foreign powers that do not have the survival of Western Civilization in their interests. I will support any and all efforts at reapproachment with our allies, to fight terrorism more effectively abroad, and increased law enforcement and emergency services to help fight the battle against terror at home. And I will support John Kerry's proposal to double funding for Special Forces, to fight terrorism all across the world.

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2004-08-09 11:22pm

Iceberg wrote:My personal stances are (revisions pending)

You flip-flopping communist. Why don't you just make up your mind and stick with one stance, regardless of changing conditions?

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2004-08-09 11:41pm

You have my vote. At least you don't have a Good-Ol-Boys system in place which prevents all progress in government affairs and actively lies to the citizens on a regular basis...

JME2 · Post by **JME2** » 2004-08-10 12:10am

You have my support and wishes of good luck and good hunting.

Iceberg · Post by **Iceberg** » 2004-08-10 12:47am

Preliminarily, I will be running for the 2nd Congressional District seat (currently held by John Kline (R)).

Lonestar · Post by **Lonestar** » 2004-08-10 12:48am

Uh, seriously?

(If so, you might want to cut your connections to sd.net NOW before FoxNews picks up on it)

JME2 · Post by **JME2** » 2004-08-10 12:54am

Lonestar wrote:Uh, seriously?

(If so, you might want to cut your connections to sd.net NOW before FoxNews picks up on it)

Eh, let the fundies come. They will unable to withstand a full counterattack from the likes of us, eh comrades?

Lonestar · Post by **Lonestar** » 2004-08-10 12:57am

JME2 wrote: Eh, let the fundies come. They will unable to withstand a full counterattack from the likes of us, eh comrades?

I come from a long line of fundies, and to quote some old dead dude:

"Famous last words."

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2004-08-10 12:59am

Lonestar wrote:Uh, seriously?

(If so, you might want to cut your connections to sd.net NOW before FoxNews picks up on it)

Einy expresses his distaste for Fox News
The Einhander Translation Service is brought to you by Durandal, your friendly, neighborhood, rampant AI.

JME2 · Post by **JME2** » 2004-08-10 01:02am

Lonestar wrote:
JME2 wrote: Eh, let the fundies come. They will unable to withstand a full counterattack from the likes of us, eh comrades?
I come from a long line of fundies, and to quote some old dead dude:

"Famous last words."

I kid, I kid - at least until we can get DW to sound the charge.

Lonestar · Post by **Lonestar** » 2004-08-10 01:08am

Then they can nail him on foriegn influences.

C'mon people, THINK!

JME2 · Post by **JME2** » 2004-08-10 01:13am

Lonestar wrote:Then they can nail him on foriegn influences.

C'mon people, THINK!

I was just kidding around, o mighty keeper of the Schwatz

.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2004-08-10 01:14am

"He has posted on an Internet message board" would hardly lead anyone to conclude that this entity is unduly influencing him.

Iceberg · Post by **Iceberg** » 2004-08-10 01:16am

Energy: Nuclear and renewable energy sources form a formidable advantage for the state of Minnesota. As a Representative, I will fight to keep the Prairie Island and Monticello nuclear power stations, which save our state billions of tons a year of air pollution, open and operational until they can be safely and economically replaced by nonpolluting alternatives.

Lonestar · Post by **Lonestar** » 2004-08-10 01:17am

Darth Wong wrote:"He has posted on an Internet message board" would hardly lead anyone to conclude that this entity is unduly influencing him.

He's also part of the BOTM. If a Republican politico could be brought up in a sex scandel involving his wife how long until the " He belongs to a porno usergroup" story surfaces?

Yeah, that's right. Y'all made fun of me for taking Poli Sci. Who's laughing now?

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2004-08-10 01:27am

Lonestar wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:"He has posted on an Internet message board" would hardly lead anyone to conclude that this entity is unduly influencing him.
He's also part of the BOTM. If a Republican politico could be brought up in a sex scandel involving his wife how long until the "He belongs to a porno usergroup" story surfaces?

When people find out that the "porno" is nothing more than Playboy-style pictures, it would elicit a collective yawn. You need infidelity or child-porn to get peoples' anti-porn phobias up.

Yeah, that's right. Y'all made fun of me for taking Poli Sci. Who's laughing now?

Sorry, but my policy of laughing at poli-sci is unchanged

Lonestar · Post by **Lonestar** » 2004-08-10 01:30am

Darth Wong wrote: When people find out that the "porno" is nothing more than Playboy-style pictures, it would elicit a collective yawn. You need infidelity or child-porn to get peoples' anti-porn phobias up.

You vastly underestimate middle-America Mike.

OTOH, Minnesota did elect Ventura, so you may be on to something. Maybe if he was runnning in Bumbscuttle Arkansas it would be different.

Sorry, but my policy of laughing at poli-sci is unchanged

How about Southern Baptists?

Master of Ossus · Post by **Master of Ossus** » 2004-08-10 01:34am

Seeing as how I'm not from MN, and therefore my opinion is totally irrelevant, I feel safe in saying that you have a good platform. Although my support or lack thereof is totally irrelevant, I hope that you manage to get into office and that you actually manage to get some work done, there.

Raptor 597 · Post by **Raptor 597** » 2004-08-10 01:36am

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:You have my vote. At least you don't have a Good-Ol-Boys system in place which prevents all progress in government affairs and actively lies to the citizens on a regular basis...

And what is exactly is wrong with this system Ein? Its the perfect way for inbred bastards to get rich and fat, have nice secretaries, and eventually lead to depression and ultimately suicide because they spent their lives killing innocent individuals. Honestly though this state is and always will be a shithole.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2004-08-10 01:39am

Lonestar wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:When people find out that the "porno" is nothing more than Playboy-style pictures, it would elicit a collective yawn. You need infidelity or child-porn to get peoples' anti-porn phobias up.
You vastly underestimate middle-America Mike.

Hey, even middle-America considers Playboy tame. And any electorate which is offended by an adult looking at a Playboy-style nude picture of a woman on his own time would be so medieval in mindset that they wouldn't elect anyone but a raving fundie anyway.

OTOH, Minnesota did elect Ventura, so you may be on to something. Maybe if he was runnning in Bumbscuttle Arkansas it would be different.

I've never been to Bumbscuttle. It sounds like a smelly place.

Sorry, but my policy of laughing at poli-sci is unchanged
How about Southern Baptists?

Nope, the policy on Southern Baptists is still mockery, and will be as long as the SBC continues to proudly set the standard in reactionary stupidity. Any reasonable Southern Baptists would still be deemed exceptions to the rule.

Stuart Mackey · Post by **Stuart Mackey** » 2004-08-10 01:46am

Iceberg wrote:And I will be running for the position of United States Representative for the State of Minnesota (district yet to be determined) in 2006 as a member of the Democratic-Farmer-Labor Party.

snip

What you need to do is get your party to have a set platform and campain on that one platform in every seat.
..Once you get enough congresscritters/senators in, push through your own legislation and derail the president by refusing all his programmes that dont fit with your parties platform. 'Advise' the President on his policy, which he must follow because you will have a majority in the house, thefore you control the purse strings...
Declare yourself Prime Minister

phongn · Post by **phongn** » 2004-08-10 02:08am

Iceberg wrote:Energy: Nuclear and renewable energy sources form a formidable advantage for the state of Minnesota. As a Representative, I will fight to keep the Prairie Island and Monticello nuclear power stations, which save our state billions of tons a year of air pollution, open and operational until they can be safely and economically replaced by nonpolluting alternatives.

Meaning ... they stay open until fusion becomes commercially viable?

Chris OFarrell · Post by **Chris OFarrell** » 2004-08-10 02:13am

phongn wrote:
Iceberg wrote:Energy: Nuclear and renewable energy sources form a formidable advantage for the state of Minnesota. As a Representative, I will fight to keep the Prairie Island and Monticello nuclear power stations, which save our state billions of tons a year of air pollution, open and operational until they can be safely and economically replaced by nonpolluting alternatives.
Meaning ... they stay open until fusion becomes commercially viable?

*Burns voice*

Excelllent.

Post by **Zaia** » 2004-08-10 02:17am

Mark, you rock. If I lived in MN, I would definitely vote for you, and if by some bizarre twist of fate I move there before 2006, I will vote for you.

Bob McDob · Post by **Bob McDob** » 2004-08-10 02:18am

phongn wrote:
Iceberg wrote:Energy: Nuclear and renewable energy sources form a formidable advantage for the state of Minnesota. As a Representative, I will fight to keep the Prairie Island and Monticello nuclear power stations, which save our state billions of tons a year of air pollution, open and operational until they can be safely and economically replaced by nonpolluting alternatives.
Meaning ... they stay open until fusion becomes commercially viable?

Microwave power!

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