Vaginal Birth or Cesarean Section?
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C-section, I was about 4 weeks late.
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Spits off to side, the wad of tobacco visible even in the fire light. Draped over his shoulder is a simple brown blanket. 'Round him, sitting on split logs, are a various people.
"Gather 'round, gather 'round," He repeats, motioning with his arms," Tonight is the story of my birth." A hush falls over the crowd. "Where to start, where to start... Ah yes, that will do..."
"It was the winter of '85, back then winter in pittsburgh were cold enough to make you sterile with just the thought of them and babies were born with fur parkas and those funny little russian hats. Snow high enough to lose a weee babe in. It was time for the men of the halls of the undermount to check the slowing apparatus on a 'Geap', my father and father's father clambering beneath the hulking beast to tame the wild thing. My mother was suddenly struck with a pain. Having bore my father a son before, I am successfully denied making a joke about her thinking the devil was running through her bowels. But say what you will, I was hell bent on coming out. She called my father, who jacked the beast down and rushed to our warren. There my mother was rushed and it was off to the medicine lodge! Oh, what a ride. Uncleared streets and ice as black as the night covered the roads. Oh, but I was coming, and nothing could stop me. After a drive worthy enough for its own tale, they arrived and my mother was rushed to a birthing chamber. She told them I would come, and that a medicine man should get there, but they would not listen. Shame. I arrived soon there after, with a pffft! Oh, what a day it would have been if the doctor didn't show then and catch me. Aye, I was an impatient one."
And the sad thing is, aside from the story, thats how it happened.
"Gather 'round, gather 'round," He repeats, motioning with his arms," Tonight is the story of my birth." A hush falls over the crowd. "Where to start, where to start... Ah yes, that will do..."
"It was the winter of '85, back then winter in pittsburgh were cold enough to make you sterile with just the thought of them and babies were born with fur parkas and those funny little russian hats. Snow high enough to lose a weee babe in. It was time for the men of the halls of the undermount to check the slowing apparatus on a 'Geap', my father and father's father clambering beneath the hulking beast to tame the wild thing. My mother was suddenly struck with a pain. Having bore my father a son before, I am successfully denied making a joke about her thinking the devil was running through her bowels. But say what you will, I was hell bent on coming out. She called my father, who jacked the beast down and rushed to our warren. There my mother was rushed and it was off to the medicine lodge! Oh, what a ride. Uncleared streets and ice as black as the night covered the roads. Oh, but I was coming, and nothing could stop me. After a drive worthy enough for its own tale, they arrived and my mother was rushed to a birthing chamber. She told them I would come, and that a medicine man should get there, but they would not listen. Shame. I arrived soon there after, with a pffft! Oh, what a day it would have been if the doctor didn't show then and catch me. Aye, I was an impatient one."
And the sad thing is, aside from the story, thats how it happened.
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You would know, your mother would have a big scar across or down her stomach and be blaming you. I think nowadays they cut sideways rather than downward and leave less of a scar though.Darth_Zod wrote:am i weird for simply not knowing? *scratches head*
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Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht frist and lsat ltteer are in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae we do not raed ervey lteter by it slef but the wrod as a wlohe.
To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift. ~Steve Prefontaine
Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht frist and lsat ltteer are in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae we do not raed ervey lteter by it slef but the wrod as a wlohe.
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Vaginal. In the 'for what it's worth' department, thats how I want to have my kids as well.
I'm sure you were all so curious
I'm sure you were all so curious
Darth Wong wrote:The American "family values" agenda is simple: alter the world so that you can completely ignore your child and still be confident that he is receiving the same kind of Christian upbringing that you would give him if you weren't busy.
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Not neccisarily, I dont have a clue...but that's likely because I'm adoptedArmorPierce wrote:You would know, your mother would have a big scar across or down her stomach and be blaming you. I think nowadays they cut sideways rather than downward and leave less of a scar though.Darth_Zod wrote:am i weird for simply not knowing? *scratches head*
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"It's all about popularity really, if your invisible friend that tells you to invade places is called Napoleon, you're a loony, if he's called Jesus then you're the president."
"I'd drive more people insane, but I'd have to double back and pick them up first..."
"All it takes for bullshit to thrive is for rational men to do nothing." - Kevin Farrell, B.A. Journalism.
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Vaginal. Hell, I was dying to get out. Almost came out in the taxi on the way to the hospital. Was about a push or two away from being born in a snowbank.
Mom was in labor for about 6 hours. Needless to say, I'm her favorite.
Mom was in labor for about 6 hours. Needless to say, I'm her favorite.
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My mother dropped me out of the birthing channel between a meeting at work and an appointment with the nanny. She was very efficient about it.
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Vaginal...Is it me or does it seem that the use of the C-section in on the rise? If there is a statistical rise in the the number of C-section procedures, does that indicate that women are having "more" problems successfully carrying a baby to term?
If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything.
My sister and I were both delivered vaginally. I was 9 lbs and my sister was just shy of 12lbs. Way to go Mom!
Any time I think I'm in pain, I try to imagine what it would be like to shit a 12lb watermellon... it's rather humbling.
Any time I think I'm in pain, I try to imagine what it would be like to shit a 12lb watermellon... it's rather humbling.
"The unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates
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Avatar - "Praying" by Alex Grey.
C-Section. Same with my brother and sister. Mom just didnt have big enough pelvis for us to properly fit through and we likely would have had mental defects had we come out naturally.
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Like all the smartest people; I was born by caesarian section, not having our heads crushed in the birth canal allows us to have bigger brains!
Both my brother and I were born by c-section, since we were the wrong way round in the womb. I'm kinda glad, to tell you the truth. I can both kill Macbeth and honestly say, unlike the "naturals" that i've never touched my mum's pussy.
Both my brother and I were born by c-section, since we were the wrong way round in the womb. I'm kinda glad, to tell you the truth. I can both kill Macbeth and honestly say, unlike the "naturals" that i've never touched my mum's pussy.
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I was born vaginally, apparently the doctor was rough with the forceps. It may be the reason I have brain damage today.
"Oh no, oh yeah, tell me how can it be so fair
That we dying younger hiding from the police man over there
Just for breathing in the air they wanna leave me in the chair
Electric shocking body rocking beat streeting me to death"
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That we dying younger hiding from the police man over there
Just for breathing in the air they wanna leave me in the chair
Electric shocking body rocking beat streeting me to death"
- A.B. Original, Report to the Mist
"I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately."
- George Carlin