Orgasmatron invented

dr. what · Post by **dr. what** » 2005-02-08 04:29pm

Oh great---one less reason for hetero women to have us males around...

An electronic device designed to improve women's sexual satisfaction has passed its first major test.

American researcher Dr Stuart Meloy claimed his invention - known as the Orgasmatron - resulted in improved sexual response in 91 per cent of those in clinical trials.

The device, implanted into the buttocks, is said to produce an orgasm at the push of a remote-controlled button.

Dr Meloy said a trial involving 11 patients had shown the Orgasmatron - a name which he has trademarked - does work.

'In ten of the 11 patients, we were able to give them a sensation that they described as pleasurable,' said Dr Meloy, of the Piedmont Anesthesia and Pain Consultants clinic in North Carolina.

'Even those who could not reach orgasm reported an increase in sexual satisfaction so in that sense it was still successful. The results were promising in my mind.

I think we have demonstrated that it works.'

The device is named after the gadget in the 1968 film Barbarella, which saw Jane Fonda playing a 41st century space adventurer. In one famous scene she is hooked up to a sexual pleasure machine. A similar machine was featured in Woody Allen's 1973 movie Sleepers.

Patients can pay £9,000 to have two electrodes implanted which are connected by wires to the appropriate nerves in the spinal cord.

With a remote-control they can send tiny pulses of electricity through their spinal nerves, which can lead to orgasm.

Dr Meloy, who is to submit the trial results to the journal Neural Modulation, originally used the device to ease back pain. He became aware of the positive side effects when a patient suggested he teach her husband how to 'do that'.

The operation costs £9,000. A temporary system can be fitted for up to ten days for £1,600.

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Keevan_Colton · Post by **Keevan_Colton** » 2005-02-08 04:30pm

We had a big thread on this in ARSE a while back.

Chmee · Post by **Chmee** » 2005-02-08 04:32pm

That's not an Orgasmatron (although Woody Allen should look into suing) .... it's a Tasp.

Sharpshooter · Post by **Sharpshooter** » 2005-02-08 08:41pm

Nine thousand bucks and having someone tinkering around with your spinal cord sounds a bit too far to go for a good orgasm, if you ask me. Unless there's a severe problem - which might very well make the thing worthless, anyway - you can probably get the same general result with the right tools and enough time, I'd imagine.

Is this the same guy who came on Stern about a week or so ago, by any chance?

Enforcer Talen · Post by **Enforcer Talen** » 2005-02-08 08:43pm

give it 10 yrs, and Ill get my female one.

Slartibartfast · Post by **Slartibartfast** » 2005-02-08 08:48pm

Let me know when they figure out a device that makes everyone in a set radius (or in a set direction) to orgasm at the push of a button

Enforcer Talen · Post by **Enforcer Talen** » 2005-02-08 08:57pm

messy.

Frank Hipper · Post by **Frank Hipper** » 2005-02-08 09:02pm

I assure you, it is but the palest immitation of GALE Force's Orgasmatron 5000.

When women scream in agony at the mere mention of being seperated from it, I'll be impressed.
When men joyfully ejaculate blood after extended use of it, I'll be impressed.

Until then, I call it an overpriced dildo.

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2005-02-09 06:21am

Reminds me of an episode of the remake series Randall & Hopkirk: Deceased where such a machine existed in wireless form so as to make anyone in a certain area orgasm until the machine was switched off. Pretty damn nifty, especially given the final fight against the creator in that episode which was fucking hilarious.

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2005-02-09 07:05am

bah! Just give your lady a sybian instead. One of those will only set you back a couple hundred dollars.

Guy N. Cognito · Post by **Guy N. Cognito** » 2005-02-09 03:47pm

Wow, I'm not sure if this is the height of laziness or not.
:I don't want to work to give my wife an orgasm. <Lifts finger and pushes button> I hate doing that. It's too much work.
In all fairness, I know it's good for some women who have problems getting excited, but I just have bad thoughts about these things making people lazy. That and I think it would be funny if they were on an open frequency and a garage door openner starting setting these things off.

Spyder · Post by **Spyder** » 2005-02-09 11:28pm

Guy N. Cognito wrote:Wow, I'm not sure if this is the height of laziness or not.
:I don't want to work to give my wife an orgasm. <Lifts finger and pushes button> I hate doing that. It's too much work.
In all fairness, I know it's good for some women who have problems getting excited, but I just have bad thoughts about these things making people lazy. That and I think it would be funny if they were on an open frequency and a garage door openner starting setting these things off.

Then we'll start seeing the area effect device.