This isnt so much about the news topic, but it's more about these wonderful articles which really make you smile due to the way the journalist has written it.
the bbc wrote:
A lieutenant has been disciplined after using an Army helicopter to deliver a pizza to his girlfriend.
The incident on 25 January saw the unnamed officer divert from a routine training flight over Stanford, Norfolk, to take the fast food.
The Ministry of Defence refused to name the officer, from 659 Squadron, or divulge how he was punished.
A spokesman said: "The chain of command doesn't condone these sorts of actions. The individuals have been disciplined."
He added: "During a routine low-level training sortie, somebody decided it would be an opportunity to use it for a delivery."
The extra cost caused by the diversion is not known.
The pizza was understood to have been delivered to a female officer cadet at an Army range at Thetford, Norfolk.
The Ministry of Defence spokesman did not confirm what toppings were on the pizza.
Any other semi-serious news articles that have been written with the tongue firmly in cheek out there?
Mods, if you feel this is OT material, then feel free to move it - beyond people shaking their heads at people who abuse military equipment, there isnt really much discussion involved with this, and it's more about the last line than anything else.
"...a fountain of mirth, issuing forth from the penis of a cupid..." ~ Dalton / Winner of the 'Frank Hipper Most Horrific Drag EVAR' award - 2004 / The artist formerly known as The_Lumberjack.
Evil Brit Conspiracy: Token Moose Obsessed Kebab Munching Semi Geordie
Let him land on any Lyran world to taste firsthand the wrath of peace loving people thwarted by the myopic greed of a few miserly old farts- Katrina Steiner
Reminds me of a few years back when an entire regiment in Karlskrona was "disciplined" for using the coastal surveillance cameras to record videos of people having sex on the beaches, then selling the videos over the internet.
And what kind of helicopter are we talking about here? I have this mental image of a fully-armed AH-64 Apache landing in the Pizza Hut parking lot--preferably landing with all the weapons pointed straight at the poor guy behind the counter--and scaring the shit out of the crew in the process.
"The best part of losing your mind is not missing it."
Kerneth wrote:And what kind of helicopter are we talking about here? I have this mental image of a fully-armed AH-64 Apache landing in the Pizza Hut parking lot
Checking...
659 Squadron, British Army Air Corps, flies the Lynx AH.9
The M2HB: The Greatest Machinegun Ever Made.
HAB: Crew-Served Weapons Specialist
"Making fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a high powered rifle and scope." --P.J. O'Rourke
"A man who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself." --J.S. Mill
I remember hearing of an airlift squadron back here basing their training sorties around March Madness. They got to see a lot of good games, but were ultimately shitcanned by the higher ups.
The most basic assumption about the world is that it does not contradict itself.
Darth Wong wrote:As amusing as that may be, unauthorized personal use of state property is no different than embezzlement of state funds.
True. But the amusing part isn't that. Its the statement
The Ministry of Defence spokesman did not confirm what toppings were on the pizza.
That tongue in cheek statement is great!
Let him land on any Lyran world to taste firsthand the wrath of peace loving people thwarted by the myopic greed of a few miserly old farts- Katrina Steiner
I think Zaphod said it best: "OK, so ten out of ten for style, but minus several million for good thinking, yeah?"
"Prodesse Non Nocere." "It's all about popularity really, if your invisible friend that tells you to invade places is called Napoleon, you're a loony, if he's called Jesus then you're the president." "I'd drive more people insane, but I'd have to double back and pick them up first..." "All it takes for bullshit to thrive is for rational men to do nothing." - Kevin Farrell, B.A. Journalism. BOTM - EBC - Horseman - G&C - Vampire
This reminds me of that post a while back, of the AH-64 using its long range camera to spy on a couple going at it in the back of a pickup. The dialouge on teh squadron channel is just priceless....
Any other semi-serious news articles that have been written with the tongue firmly in cheek out there? 
