When Will you die?

Post by **haas mark** » 2002-11-19 10:42am

Took it again and...

Mark your calendar or Palm V. You can expect to die on:

August 20, 2055
at the age of 71 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Cancer (28%)
Heart Attack (19%)
Alien Abduction (11%)
Horrible Accident (6%)
Loneliness (6%)

Post by **Mr Bean** » 2002-11-19 10:54am

June 5, 2073
at the age of 95 years old.

Cancer (20%)
Drowning (12%)
Alien Abduction (11%)
Heart Attack (8%)
Wild Animal Mauling (7%)
Homicide (7%)
Auto-Fellatio (5%)

Nice Looks like I'll be outliving half the board

*Though I wonder about the Cancer, rougly... none of my family has even died from it

Crayz9000 · Post by **Crayz9000** » 2002-11-19 11:06am

Mr Bean wrote: Auto-Fellatio (5%)

There it is again...

Tsyroc · Post by **Tsyroc** » 2002-11-19 11:06am

Mr Bean wrote:June 5, 2073
at the age of 95 years old.

Cancer (20%)
Drowning (12%)
Alien Abduction (11%)
Heart Attack (8%)
Wild Animal Mauling (7%)
Homicide (7%)
Auto-Fellatio (5%)

Nice Looks like I'll be outliving half the board

*Though I wonder about the Cancer, rougly... none of my family has even died from it

Geez, if I lived to the same date as Bean I'd be 104!

You also have an intersting list of potential deaths. How did you end up with drowning so high on the list?

Post by **haas mark** » 2002-11-19 11:09am

Tsyroc wrote:
Mr Bean wrote:June 5, 2073
at the age of 95 years old.

Cancer (20%)
Drowning (12%)
Alien Abduction (11%)
Heart Attack (8%)
Wild Animal Mauling (7%)
Homicide (7%)
Auto-Fellatio (5%)

Nice Looks like I'll be outliving half the board

*Though I wonder about the Cancer, rougly... none of my family has even died from it
Geez, if I lived to the same date as Bean I'd be 104!

I would be 89.

Crayz9000 · Post by **Crayz9000** » 2002-11-19 11:10am

verilon wrote:I would be 89.

Seems quite a few people were born in '84.

Post by **haas mark** » 2002-11-19 11:12am

Crayz9000 wrote:
verilon wrote:I would be 89.
Seems quite a few people were born in '84.

Correct that. I'd be 88. My birthday is the next month.

Larz · Post by **Larz** » 2002-11-19 11:12am

August 17, 2046
at the age of 62 years old.

Post by **Mr Bean** » 2002-11-19 11:22am

You also have an intersting list of potential deaths. How did you end up with drowning so high on the list?

I swim alot

I'm in the United Status Navy

You figure the rest out

The Dark · Post by **The Dark** » 2002-11-19 01:31pm

Mark your calendar or Palm V. You can expect to die on:
December 17, 2068
at the age of 85 years old.
On that date you will most likely die from:
Cancer (36%)
Heart Attack (28%)
Homicide (8%)
Horrible Accident (6%)
Contagious Disease (6%)

Damaramu · Post by **Damaramu** » 2002-11-19 01:41pm

June 8, 2048
at the age of 72 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Cancer (16%)
Electrolysis (16%)
Heart Attack (12%)
Alien Abduction (8%)
Horrible Accident (8%)
Homicide (6%)
Auto-Fellatio (5%)

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2002-11-19 02:16pm

October 4, 2070
at the age of 91 years old.

Cancer (34%)
Heart Attack (15%)
Homicide (7%)
Alien Abduction (7%)
Third Degree Burns (5%)
Alcoholism (5%)

I always figured the mountain biking and sex were good for something. I'm not sure where the 3rd degree burns come from, so what if I like playing with the campfire while cookin' up food. And alien abduction, wtf is up with that?

Evil Sadistic Bastard · Post by **Evil Sadistic Bastard** » 2002-11-19 02:37pm

Surprisingly, big ugly fat fuck I am, I'm slated to die on May 26, 2063
at the age of 79 years old.

Pu-239 · Post by **Pu-239** » 2002-11-19 03:26pm

December 29, 2067
at the age of 80 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Heart Attack (30%)
Cancer (24%)
Third Degree Burns (8%)
Alcoholism (6%)

Umm they forgot to mention that life will suck a couple decades from now

Setzer · Post by **Setzer** » 2002-11-19 06:20pm

Mark your calendar or Palm V. You can expect to die on:

March 4, 2066
at the age of 79 years old.

THEHOOLIGANJEDI · Post by **THEHOOLIGANJEDI** » 2002-11-19 06:37pm

My First Test:
Mark your calendar or Palm V. You can expect to die on:

April 14, 2055
at the age of 72 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Cancer (34%)
Heart Attack (22%)
Alien Abduction (10%)
Third Degree Burns (6%)
Horrible Accident (6%)

My second:
April 10, 2062
at the age of 79 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Heart Attack (25%)
Cancer (25%)
Third Degree Burns (12%)
Alien Abduction (9%)
Homicide (7%)
Organ Failure (6%)
Auto-Fellatio (6%)

Very strange.

starfury · Post by **starfury** » 2002-11-19 06:42pm

June 19, 2054
at the age of 71 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Cancer (27%)
Drowning (12%)
Alien Abduction (11%)
Homicide (10%)
Alcoholism (10%)
Heart Attack (6%)
Loneliness (5%)

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2002-11-19 06:42pm

January 29, 2055
at the age of 80 years old.

Ah dammit...and here I was thinking I would die earlier...ah well

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2002-11-19 06:47pm

Mark your calendar or Palm V. You can expect to die on:

August 24, 2047
at the age of 66 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Heart Attack (26%)
Cancer (15%)
Electrolysis (11%)
Alcoholism (10%)
Drowning (6%)
Homicide (5%)

Post by **Mr Bean** » 2002-11-19 08:00pm

June 5, 2073

Has anyone gotten any later than 2073?

Just wondering who's going to be outliving me

Post by **fgalkin** » 2002-11-19 08:23pm

Mark your calendar or Palm V. You can expect to die on:

April 24, 2080
at the age of 95 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Cancer (23%)
Heart Attack (14%)
Drowning (12%)
Loneliness (8%)
Alcoholism (7%)
Contagious Disease (6%)

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! I'll live longer than you!

Have a very nice day
-fgalkin

Frank Hipper · Post by **Frank Hipper** » 2002-11-19 08:30pm

Took the test months ago, forget exact numbers but I will die in 2019, at the age of 52, likely of cancer or alchoholism.

Captain Cyran · Post by **Captain Cyran** » 2002-11-19 08:30pm

Mark your calendar or Palm V. You can expect to die on:

November 24, 2065
at the age of 79 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Cancer (25%)
Alien Abduction (19%)
Homicide (11%)
Suicide (8%)
Third Degree Burns (6%)
Drowning (6%)

Interesting stats from the DeathTest:

12680327 people have taken the DeathTest.
Of those, 55% were female and 45% were male.
The average life expectancy of test takers is 67 years.
10% of test takers have hairy nipples.
4% have had team sex.
8% work in the porn business.
And 234291 people claim to have leprosy.

Disclaimer: We, despite being proficient with the human anatomy, are not doctors. Keep that in mind before calling your lawyer as you're clutching your left arm moaning "Damn you, Spark, Damn YOU!" on November 24, 2065, as you slip silently into the night.

aerius · Post by **aerius** » 2002-11-20 03:18pm

My GF's got the longest lifespan if this test is right. I guess being a nice healthy national level swimmer has it's advantages. Her stats:

You can expect to die on:

October 2, 2081
at the age of 101 years old.

On that date you will most likely die from:

Cancer (43%)
Drowning (8%)
Auto-Erotic Asphyxiation (7%)
Homicide (6%)

Seriously now, where's the option that says "you will die from old age"?

TrailerParkJawa · Post by **TrailerParkJawa** » 2002-11-20 03:24pm

April 16, 2051
at the age of 79 years old.