First, one of the Neo-Nazi -er, National Review's hacks slams ROTS based on a review by an ignorant schmuck who thinks the movie is anti-Bush Then John Podhoretz (he is a second-rate version of his father, the infamous right-wing hack Norman Podhoretz -who is himself second rate come to think of it...) applies his pudgy fingers to his keyboard and as Han Solo says "This is where the fun begins!" :
There is more concentrated stupidity in this "review" than... Aw fuck it, I can't stop laughing long enough to start. Thanks to James Wolcott, I don't have to :THE ANTI-BUSH STAR WARS [John Podhoretz]
Warren, it's all there, but believe me, the movie's plot is so confused that it doesn't really matter. At one point, Natalie Portman complains that "this war happened because of a failure to listen." But the war she's talking about was started by the good guys! It was the Jedi who secretly built the Clone army that appeared in the movie before this upcoming one. And, of course, the Rebellion that Luke Skywalker joined in the first trilogy was conducting a war against the Evil Empire which included blowing up Death Stars and arming Teddy Bears. Evidently 25 years into the Star Wars empire, George Lucas decided he just doesn't like war. Now he tells us. The whole confusion is reminiscent of the last Matrix movie, which is all about a noble truce between our heroes and the computers that have been using all of humanity as batteries. So that a few people could survive to have orgies in the underground city of Zion, billions of people had to remain in the Matrix. Inadvertently, both Lucas and the Wachowski brothers (who wrote and directed the Matrix movies) reveal with their brainless anti-Bushism the essential cowardly vapidity of pacifism.
http://www.jameswolcott.com/
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Two's a Crowd
Posted by James Wolcott
John Podhoretz has joined the posse of basket-weavers at NRO's The Corner, and he's already making a big splash. He's been embroiled in an epic fight with emailers who take umbrage as only conservative dweebs can at his interpretations of the Star Wars cosmology. Today he tore off his bib and make it clear he had had enough from these cyber gnats.
"I'm getting a lot of e-mails from obsessive fanboys who insist that the good guys in the Star Wars movies didn't start the wars in question but were tricked into it by a 'Dark Side of the Force' conspiracy. It's almost impossible to wade through all the nonsense on the Web to get to the bottom of this, and to be perfectly honest, I have no interest in doing so. The fact that George Lucas is such an incompetent storyteller that it's impossible to figure out who started what and when is Lucas's fault, not mine. Let's just agree to this: The Jedi know how to beat people up and how to slice their arms and hands off -- and they are not averse to blowing up a Death Star or two. Okay? Now move out of your parents's basements and join an Internet dating service before you lose all your hair."
You mean, like this? [see below -Elfdart]
I mean to cast no aspersions. We all wasted away our adolescence in different ways. But just because Pod Junior went bald in his parents' basement pretending to be a Jedi warrior with the maid's broom is no reason to douse the dreams of National Review's future generation of ideological goobers.
However, I question his very admittance into the Corner. Just as adding John Tierney to the NY Times op-ed page means that the paper now has two David Brooks, ushering in Podhoretz gives the group blog two Jonah Goldbergs, which I think we can agree makes for quite a wagonload.
Both are the sons of famed conservatives. Both pride themselves on their pop culture acumen. Both fancy themselves comedians. If I were Jonah I'd be quite miffed, having my distinctive niche duplicated.
But I suppose they know what they're doing over there. Though there seems something fishy about a site with banner ads from the Cato Institute holding a fundraiser for itself.
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Here's the link to further Poddy's shame:
http://nymetro.com/rnc/gopclass.htm
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!