War of the Words, Fed vs Empire

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Who wins?

The Federation gives up based on the Empire's brute strength claims.
4
22%
All the Empire's soldiers in that section of space commit suicide from hearing the technobabble constantly.
6
33%
They call a truce, each leaving the other alone (with heavy suicide casualties on both sides).
4
22%
Other(please specify)
4
22%
 
Total votes: 18

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DrkHelmet
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War of the Words, Fed vs Empire

Post by DrkHelmet »

Through <insert technobabble reason here>, the Federation and the Empire now have complete and utter access to each others' com channels. Also, because of <insert technobabble>, neither is capable of shutting the other one off of blocking them out. Attempting to make the best of the situation, they attempt to wage psychological warfare against one another.

SW: The Empire talks 24 hours a day on Federation Channels about how they have wiped out an order of supernatural beings and are capable of destroying entire planets by pushing the big green button.

ST: The Federation attempts to drive the enemy soldiers crazy by talking 24 hours a day in technobabble.

What would happen?
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DrkHelmet
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Post by DrkHelmet »

Crap, could a mod please add an "Other (please specify)" option? I forgot to press "add option" I guess.
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Post by Civil War Man »

Other: The Empire makes good on their bragging, and blow up the Federation with the Big Green Button.
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Post by LaserRifleofDoom »

It should probably be assumed that they can only talk to eachother, not actually meet, though they might not be willing to reveal that to the other side.
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Post by DrkHelmet »

LaserRifleofDoom wrote:It should probably be assumed that they can only talk to eachother, not actually meet, though they might not be willing to reveal that to the other side.
Yeah, although meeting in the near future will be possible, hence why the Empire can threaten.
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Post by Darth Servo »

This may be one matchup where the Federation can actually beat the Empire. They just have Data read some of his poetry. :D
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Post by DrkHelmet »

Darth Servo wrote:This may be one matchup where the Federation can actually beat the Empire. They just have Data read some of his poetry. :D
If you guys don't mind, I would like to expand this a little. Instead of just the topics mentioned, you may use ANY topic as either side, as long as it fits in with the general outlook of the side you represent. (For example, no Palpatine tap dancing or Worf playing the flute)
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Post by Noble Ire »

Darth Servo wrote:This may be one matchup where the Federation can actually beat the Empire. They just have Data read some of his poetry. :D
Am I the only one who liked "Ode to Spot?" :P

Hmm, my bet? The Federation collapses into civil unrest after the Empire puts commericals and entertainment media on the comm channel, and the UFP populace wonders why they can't have a personal shuttle for only five easy payments of $999.99. :)
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Post by Solauren »

The Empire learns about the Borg, and starts airing footage of a single star destroyer ass-raping a fleet of Borg cubes.

The Federation screams in terror and BEGS to join.
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Post by Instant Sunrise »

I'm sure the empire is vast enough to include Vogons, They have ET

All it takes is Oh freddled gruntbuggly, for the Feddies to capitulate and beg for mercy.

Unless, Genosians ARE Vogons.
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Post by Darth Servo »

Noble Ire wrote:Am I the only one who liked "Ode to Spot?" :P
In a word--yes
"everytime a person is born the Earth weighs just a little more."--DMJ on StarTrek.com
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Post by brianeyci »

I have not been around long, but this is actually one of the most interesting threads I've seen started. Everybody knows the Empire would crush the Feds. Even a cursory glance at the source material will tell you that. This thread is not about that. The question is -- could the Empire convince the Feds of their technology base, purely through words. If I understand the op properly, there is no way to traverse between universes.

I'm not sure it is possible for either side to scare the other, just through descriptions of what they can do. Starfleet, despite being a pussy, wouldn't commit suicide just because of boasting. The Empire won't be intimidated whatever the Feds say.

Whether or not the Federation and the Empire can call a truce depends on whether or not someone like Picard could figure out that an Empire that threatens to blow up planets and says they can kill supernatural beings respects power. Let's say if Picard makes up his own fibs about how his Federation has enslaved countless billions, etc., maybe the Empire could respect that. Only then could a truce be called.

If worse comes to worse, both sides can learn to ignore each other and use different tech. Hearing someone spew propaganda constantly over comm channels sucks, but mankind on both sides will find ways around it. More primitive means of communication, which don't rely on the compromised technology, would come back. No more subspace radio. That means no more FTL communications, but its better than having your secrets aired. Aired to another galaxy, but that other galaxy could choose to reveal your secrets to the enemies in your galaxy.

In short, both sides would just start using a lot of courier ships to ferry messages physically, or use older tech. Stalemate.

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Post by DrkHelmet »

brianeyci wrote:I have not been around long, but this is actually one of the most interesting threads I've seen started. Everybody knows the Empire would crush the Feds. Even a cursory glance at the source material will tell you that. This thread is not about that. The question is -- could the Empire convince the Feds of their technology base, purely through words. If I understand the op properly, there is no way to traverse between universes.
Close. Currently, there is no link between them for ships to traverse. However, there is always the threat that a way WILL be opened to them. Currently however, neither side can reach the other.
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Post by Darth Wong »

This thread is too retarded to continue. What's next? "Who's hotter" contests?

There are plenty of webboards on the Internet which are primarily populated by children who prefer to concoct "vs" scenarios which do not require a smidgen of technical or military knowledge to resolve. I suggest that if you want to post this kind of bimbo thread, you try one of those places instead.

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