What would happen if you let a baby keep crying

[Lukedanieljames]

I have a 3 month old son, he's annoying sometimes but I love him to death. My question is

sometimes as we all know, babies get upset and they start crying, it starts slow, and then if the situation isn't fixed they become really pissed and start howling, their faces turn red it just gets worse and worse. Babies cannot be spoiled either, not until atleast 6 months, before then you have to pick them up right away to let them know you are there, because they don't understand. My question would be, if my son was in his crib, and he started crying and my wife and I just drove off, and we came back 5 hours later, what would we expect from him? Would he die somehow? I mean is that possible?
Or would he just fall asleep eventually??

I'd never do this of course, but i'm curious as to the science behind why we its so important to pick them up

[Admiral Valdemar]

Apart from pissing anyone in earshot off, not a whole lot. Unless the kid pulls a scary breath withholding thing where they stop breathing until they get what they want (my brother used to do this), they shouldn't be at harm and will likely get tired and fall asleep. Usually there's a reason they cry, so it's best to check them immediately for any issues.

[General Zod]

It depends on why they're crying. If they're crying because they're hungry, sick, or have a dirty diaper, it's best not to leave it unattended, so you should at least check. Though if the kid stops crying the moment you pick them up, that's probably a good sign it's not either of those three.

[spongyblue]

Your first thing is to figure aout exactly what it is thats bothering them. At three months their growing fast so one the first questions is he ready to eat beacause he is needing more. The next question is to analyze the enviroment he is in. How's the tempreture, whats the lighting like, what sounds are around him. All these things can affect babies in different ways and some may not like it. Like you pointed out before, there is no way to spoil a 3 month old, and sometimes they cry because they simple want somebody there holding them. They gotta feel the presance of someone there caring for them, because in my opinion, thats the fuel for their life is love. Don't mean to turn into "FamilyCare Man" on ya, but you catch my drift.

Just leaving for a few hours while your 3 month old cries isn't a smart idea. At that age, all their energy is spent on growing, and having a baby spend that energy on crying isn't good for them at all. If you can get to a book store and get a book called What to Expect Your First Year. It's a follow-up to a book called What to Expect when your Expecting. A lot of helpfull info in those books.

[Cairber]

I recommend Dr. Sear's The Sleep Book.


I don't believe in letting a child under 6 months cry it out. Babies need to be parented to sleep before then. Explaining all the ins and outs of it would take me a while, but the book is very good. He or she will probably fall asleep if you just left them, but you would also begin to lose their crying as a signal to you that something is wrong.

As for leaving for any length of time...don't. Your baby could get lodged between the crib bumpers, begin spitting up from rage crying, be too cold or too hot, have a medical condition linked to the crying or develope something...the biggest problem would be that he could roll to his tummy and fall asleep, increasing his SIDS risk. At least if you are there, you can check on him every 3 or so hours when he will undoubtedly awake at that age.

[Cairber]

I'll add that our little girl started falling alseep through the night at 7 months. I know it seems like a long way off, but it's coming. Now she BFs, gets put in her crib, cries for about 10 seconds, and is asleep until morning.

[Kuroneko]

What would happen? Well, I'm not aware of any mass studies done on this, but a long time ago in a psychology class far away, I've heard a story about a child who grew up with his parents tending to him at set intervals regardless of his actual needs or when he voiced them. The child later formed the delusion that he was an actual robot. I can't recall the details of this, but I think this was a somewhat famous case, so if anyone can provide them, I would appreciate it.

[Cairber]

sorry -- its late...the book is Dr Sears' The Baby Sleep Book. hope it helps!

[Darth Wong]

In the 1960s there was a guy named Dr. Ferber who ran around telling parents to let babies "cry it out", but his only real evidence that this was a good idea was the fact that the babies would eventually stop crying. Since this is the same thing that happens with neglected babies in state-run orphanages in North Korea, I have serious doubts about its usefulness as a proof of concept. Sure, they stop crying, but how do you know they aren't psychologically damaged as a result of knowing that nobody cares enough to come help them when they cry?

[Darth Wong]

My question would be, if my son was in his crib, and he started crying and my wife and I just drove off, and we came back 5 hours later, what would we expect from him? Would he die somehow? I mean is that possible?

He might throw up, and there is a remote chance that he might choke to death on his own vomit as a result.

I'd never do this of course, but i'm curious as to the science behind why we its so important to pick them up

Babies who cry without result eventually stop crying. The problem is that they may be emotionally withdrawn, and there is no telling what the long-term effects of this would be. Also, I'm of the opinion that if you ignore a crying baby, you must be an asshole.

[Ariphaos]

I seem to recall that there was evidence that neglect in such a manner led to very manipulative children, especially among girls. Because they couldn't get what they wanted through normal cries for attention, they learned to resort to 'worse' methods.

[Shroom Man 777]

What would happen? Well, I'm not aware of any mass studies done on this, but a long time ago in a psychology class far away, I've heard a story about a child who grew up with his parents tending to him at set intervals regardless of his actual needs or when he voiced them. The child later formed the delusion that he was an actual robot. I can't recall the details of this, but I think this was a somewhat famous case, so if anyone can provide them, I would appreciate it.

Jesus Christ! Just how the fuck does that happen?!

[Chardok]

I must've been very very lucky. Whenever my daughter cried, it was because something was amiss. She would wail when there was a thunderstorm at night. or when her diaper was dirty, or wet, or she was hungry, but never to be burped...she seemed to figure out quite early how to belt out excess air in her stomach. Gets that from my side of the family. Aaaanyway, I always said she didn't cry much because she's lazy like me. I always coddled her when she cried, simply because she never cried for nothing. *shrug*

[Admiral Valdemar]

It's hard to ignore a crying baby, that is why they produce the most annoying sound known to man, because they evolved to get the attention of their parents pretty damn quick. If you were some real dipshit parent, you'd probably have the kid locked in some insulated room to give you peace. But anyone that does that shouldn't be breeding at all, letalone raising a child.

Though you do get good babies. I, apparently, never screamed, threw tantrums or cried for no reason, or even for a reason I was not all that loud. My brother on the other hand, was a crawling Tannoy alerting anyone within a klick radius how pissed off he was. Which was pretty much 24/7.

[Cykeisme]

Aaaanyway, I always said she didn't cry much because she's lazy like me.

Efficient. Avoids expending energy unnecessarily.

[Lukedanieljames]

these answers are good, i'm surprised that they cannot die or something because of a massive heartattack but just because of choking, although, with a bad caregiver, they can do that just by looking at the wall and choking on their own saliva, sad really

[Darth Wong]

these answers are good, i'm surprised that they cannot die or something because of a massive heartattack but just because of choking, although, with a bad caregiver, they can do that just by looking at the wall and choking on their own saliva, sad really

There have also been isolated cases of babies who asphyxiated after somehow jamming their heads through the bars of their cribs. A few crib designs were recalled after that, so I believe it's less likely now. Nevertheless, people who leave babies unattended for any lengthy period of time are being extremely irresponsible.

[wolveraptor]

What exactly happens to babies at 6 months of age so that they can be spoiled?

[Ariphaos]

What exactly happens to babies at 6 months of age so that they can be spoiled?

Humans undergo an extended period of mental development in order to fully develop vision, hearing, and basic mental structures. In most other mammals this only takes a few days or weeks - it just happens to take six months in humans due to our rather complex brain.

[Cairber]

You begin to really see the cause and effect idea kick in at 6 months (tho Im still not convinced you can spoil them that early). She would drop a toy, then look at me and wait for me to pick it up...then drop it again and laugh...

[His Divine Shadow]

I was apparently a loud baby, and after that I was wild, reckless and loud still. Now my nephew is something of a... monster of destruction but according to my parents I was much worse at his age.

[kheegster]

Unless the kid pulls a scary breath withholding thing where they stop breathing until they get what they want (my brother used to do this), they shouldn't be at harm and will likely get tired and fall asleep.

IIRC it's not physically possible for a person to asphyxiate themselves by holding breath.

[kheegster]

I remember reading an article about dealing with colicky babies. Apparently, if a baby cries for no apparent reason, the strategy to deal with them involves restricting their body movements by wrapping them tightly, making soft white noise, and rocking them gently. Apparently this helps to simulate the foetal environment.

[Lukedanieljames]

I remember reading an article about dealing with colicky babies. Apparently, if a baby cries for no apparent reason, the strategy to deal with them involves restricting their body movements by wrapping them tightly, making soft white noise, and rocking them gently. Apparently this helps to simulate the foetal environment.

thats true, however colic only lasts up to about 6 weeks, so wrapping them up tight if they are 4 months doens't work, they hate being wrapped up at that age. They'll kick-off the blankets and get very aggrevated.

Its sad really for the parents, (sometimes) one has no choice but to just run over like a programmed robot and pick them up at their whim, because they don't know the difference. Great example was last night, my wife and I were driving on the 401 and my son was hungry so he started to whimper, because we couldn't physically pick him up, 15 seconds later he was in a full power scream, with tears running down his face, i pulled over and she fed him, back to normal no problem. NO way you can get around that, physically the baby is fine, 15 seconds isn't a big deal for his stomach to handle, they can go all night after 11 pounds, so its not a physically problem. Parents are sometimes powerless to do anything, and its very annoying sometimes.