Captain Picard vs. Grand Moff Tarkin

[wilfulton]

Okay, we know about Solo and Kirk, but my curiosity was piqued in regards to a couple of the senior members of both evil empires. So let's get the ol captain Jean Luc Picard and have him duke it out with Grand Moff Tarkin, and see who wins. Just to do my traditional style, let's break it down into a few various contests:

PT Test: Army standard, push ups, sit ups, 2 mile run.

Beer drinking contest: No pauses, no spills, no regurgitation, last man standing wins.

Mystery Guest: Both get locked in a room with (now Admiral?) Janeway. See who lasts the longest without "NO MAKE IT STOP!!!"

Ass kicking contest: After both characters are now driven sufficiently insane by our mystery guest, we put them in the arena and make them duke it out with their bare fists. Rules are simple: No shirts, no shoes, only two guys to a fight, and the fight ends when one person taps or passes out. That they have to fight is a no shitter.

Quick Draw contest: Hand blasters only. No super weapons please, because our insurance doesn't cover Death Star level incidental damages. Tarkin can have whatever fancy blaster he wants, Picard can have his phasor, or whatever else he prefers. Since we're led to assume both weapons would be equally deadly against an unarmored opponent, this will naturally be the last contest.

[Noble Ire]

PT: Picard. Neither of them are particularly used to footwork, I'd imagine, and Imperial training probably involves more rigorous training, but Picard still seems more fit.

Drinking Contest: Tarkin. When your a governor of a hell hole like Eriadu, I'd imagine you'd drink quite a bit. Even if Tarkin didn't he'd still probably have a higher tolerence. No synth in the Empire.

Janeway: Hard to say. They might have to band to together to keep themselves sane.

Brawl: Tarkin. Though I'd still say Picard's more fit, Tarkin is more likely to be ruthless and aggressive.

Quick Draw: Even if the phaser doesn't slip out of Picard's hand when he draws it, its still bound to be less accurate than Tarkin's blaster. Accuracy aside, though, Picard probably has more experience in a firefight. I suppose it would depend on what weapon Picard was using.

Overall, I'd say Tarkin takes it. Barely.

[Darth Servo]

How old is Tarkin? ANH Tarkin or ROTS Tarkin?

[Bounty]

PT Test: Army standard, push ups, sit ups, 2 mile run.

Picard rides horses, fences, and appears to be in a surprisingly good condition for a man his age (ref him climbing up a rope in FC with the Queen hanging on his leg). Unless Tarkin is a closet fitness freak, I give this to Picard.

Beer drinking contest: No pauses, no spills, no regurgitation, last man standing wins.

A younger Picard may have done well, but he seems to have settled for modest quantities of wine and synthtol in his later years. Goes to Tarkin.

Mystery Guest: Both get locked in a room with (now Admiral?) Janeway. See who lasts the longest without "NO MAKE IT STOP!!!"

MAD, pun not intended.

Ass kicking contest: After both characters are now driven sufficiently insane by our mystery guest, we put them in the arena and make them duke it out with their bare fists. Rules are simple: No shirts, no shoes, only two guys to a fight, and the fight ends when one person taps or passes out. That they have to fight is a no shitter.

How long has it been since Tarkin was in a HTH fight ? Years ? Decades ?

Quick Draw contest: Hand blasters only. No super weapons please, because our insurance doesn't cover Death Star level incidental damages. Tarkin can have whatever fancy blaster he wants, Picard can have his phasor, or whatever else he prefers. Since we're led to assume both weapons would be equally deadly against an unarmored opponent, this will naturally be the last contest.

Well, we know Picard can occasionally be found at target practice, but I don't recall him being a particularly fast draw.

[Glimmervoid]

Drinking Contest: Tarkin. When your a governor of a hell hole like Eriadu, I'd imagine you'd drink quite a bit. Even if Tarkin didn't he'd still probably have a higher tolerence. No synth in the Empire.

Dose not Picards family own a vineyard were he grew up, that would mean he would have been exposed to alcohol (real stuff) from a young age and might have a higher resistance than most of the feds.

[Bounty]

Drinking Contest: Tarkin. When your a governor of a hell hole like Eriadu, I'd imagine you'd drink quite a bit. Even if Tarkin didn't he'd still probably have a higher tolerence. No synth in the Empire.

Dose not Picards family own a vineyard were he grew up, that would mean he would have been exposed to alcohol (real stuff) from a young age and might have a higher resistance than most of the feds.

They did, and Picard still drinks wine, but I doubt he ever gets drunk. In small quantities, I doubt he'd build up much of a resistance.

[Darth Wong]

This thread cannot possibly generate any serious discussion, and is the sort of thing best discussed on spacebattles.com or some similar venue.