Yet another gripe about B&B

[Perinquus]

If you go to the "Enterprise Revies" site at:
http://www.firsttvdrama.com/enterprise/index.php3
Even a cursory glance at the episodes will reveal that the vast majority of the episodes are written by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga (listed as "the usual suspects"). Even if another write wrote the actual teleplay, they usually wrote the story. What is the matter with these hacks?

Anyone else remember that the original series had a wide array of different (and actually talented) writers? In TOS, we had stories by D.C. Fontana, Robert Bloch, Theodore Sturgeon, Harlan Ellison, Gene L. Coon, Gene Roddenberry, and many, many more. The list of writers for TOS is actually huge.

But with "Enterprise" we see that week after week: "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", etc. etc.

It seems that as much as they are barren of talent, they are brimming with arrogance. Do they really think that they are doing a good job? Do they really think that they are doing so good a job that no one else can can do it, so they and they alone are the ones with the "vision" to create the show? If Roddenberry himself, the show's creator didn't hesitate to sign outside talent on board, what makes these two little shits think they're the only ones qualified to write for the show?

[data_link]

If you go to the "Enterprise Revies" site at:
http://www.firsttvdrama.com/enterprise/index.php3
Even a cursory glance at the episodes will reveal that the vast majority of the episodes are written by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga (listed as "the usual suspects"). Even if another write wrote the actual teleplay, they usually wrote the story. What is the matter with these hacks?

Anyone else remember that the original series had a wide array of different (and actually talented) writers? In TOS, we had stories by D.C. Fontana, Robert Bloch, Theodore Sturgeon, Harlan Ellison, Gene L. Coon, Gene Roddenberry, and many, many more. The list of writers for TOS is actually huge.

But with "Enterprise" we see that week after week: "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", etc. etc.

It seems that as much as they are barren of talent, they are brimming with arrogance. Do they really think that they are doing a good job? Do they really think that they are doing so good a job that no one else can can do it, so they and they alone are the ones with the "vision" to create the show? If Roddenberry himself, the show's creator didn't hesitate to sign outside talent on board, what makes these two little shits think they're the only ones qualified to write for the show?

The same thing that makes darkstar think that Star Trek could beat Star Wars... massive stupidity.

[Tsyroc]

If you go to the "Enterprise Revies" site at:
http://www.firsttvdrama.com/enterprise/index.php3
Even a cursory glance at the episodes will reveal that the vast majority of the episodes are written by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga (listed as "the usual suspects"). Even if another write wrote the actual teleplay, they usually wrote the story. What is the matter with these hacks?

Anyone else remember that the original series had a wide array of different (and actually talented) writers? In TOS, we had stories by D.C. Fontana, Robert Bloch, Theodore Sturgeon, Harlan Ellison, Gene L. Coon, Gene Roddenberry, and many, many more. The list of writers for TOS is actually huge.

But with "Enterprise" we see that week after week: "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", "Story by Rick Berman and Brannon Braga", etc. etc.

It seems that as much as they are barren of talent, they are brimming with arrogance. Do they really think that they are doing a good job? Do they really think that they are doing so good a job that no one else can can do it, so they and they alone are the ones with the "vision" to create the show? If Roddenberry himself, the show's creator didn't hesitate to sign outside talent on board, what makes these two little shits think they're the only ones qualified to write for the show?

It's one way for them to keep getting more $$$$ out of the series. Besides their producer $$$$ they also get writer $$$$.

Supposedly Roddenberry used to tweak every script that came his way, whether it needed it or not, so he would have a reason for getting his name on there. All for the $$$$. Pretty interesting since he's the one who pushed for the cashless Federation of TNG.

[Uraniun235]

That kind of crap wasn't even in TNG. I think we've definitely nailed down the reason for Enterprise's suckiness now...

Maybe the staff writers got fed up and quit? I wouldn't be surprised if B&B are the only creative staff (besides the pretty graphics people, without which they would be fucked) left.

[Master of Ossus]

I love the one premise that they have for one episode: "T'Pol has a dream she gets laid." That had to be the funniest thing I've ever read. I personally have not seen the episode, but I have heard from numerous sources that I trust that that actually is what happened! That just made it funnier!

[Captain tycho]

I love the one premise that they have for one episode: "T'Pol has a dream she gets laid." That had to be the funniest thing I've ever read. I personally have not seen the episode, but I have heard from numerous sources that I trust that that actually is what happened! That just made it funnier!

Now seeing Dax get laid woulda been great , but T'pol.... I'll pass

[neoolong]

I love the one premise that they have for one episode: "T'Pol has a dream she gets laid." That had to be the funniest thing I've ever read. I personally have not seen the episode, but I have heard from numerous sources that I trust that that actually is what happened! That just made it funnier!

Now seeing Dax get laid woulda been great , but T'pol.... I'll pass

I would like to see the good looking Dax get laid. With the other good looking Dax. Kinky.

[Master of Ossus]

Now seeing Dax get laid woulda been great , but T'pol.... I'll pass

Seeing almost anyone get laid would have been better. Uhura, EITHER Dax, Kira, Crusher (even now [shudders]) Troi, Saavik, Torres, Seven, in fact, the only two female characters who I would NOT rather see get laid in ST are Janeway and possibly Guinan.

[Captain tycho]

Now seeing Dax get laid woulda been great , but T'pol.... I'll pass

Seeing almost anyone get laid would have been better. Uhura, EITHER Dax, Kira, Crusher (even now [shudders]) Troi, Saavik, Torres, Seven, in fact, the only two female characters who I would NOT rather see get laid in ST are Janeway and possibly Guinan.

What, you don't like Whoopi?
She's adorable.

[Master of Ossus]

What, you don't like Whoopi?
She's adorable.

To quote "The Simpsons": I was a fool to think anyone would want nude pictures of Whoopi Goldberg. [throws them into bottomless pit, which rejects them and throws the pictures back] WHAT THE?!?

[Perinquus]

I love the one premise that they have for one episode: "T'Pol has a dream she gets laid." That had to be the funniest thing I've ever read. I personally have not seen the episode, but I have heard from numerous sources that I trust that that actually is what happened! That just made it funnier!

Now seeing Dax get laid woulda been great , but T'pol.... I'll pass

Oh I wouldn't mind. She does have a great body. Even her face really isn't bad (though I've seen better). The real problem is the way they make Jolene Blalock look on the show, because as you know, in Bragatrektm, ALL Vulcans, regardless of sex, have the same pageboy haistyle.

[Glocksman]

Whettestone makes a point about sexiness as compared to sluttiness when he reviews 'Broken Bow' .

We want sexy, not slutty.

What was the sexiest appearance of a female Vulcan? Think back to Kirstie Alley on Star Trek 2. What was the sexiest scene? When she was in the turbolift with Kirk. Saavik was in uniform all day, then suddenly shows up in a loose white robe and her hair down.

But B&B decide instead to give us a slutty Vulcan who dances around in a catsuit 24/7. Yeah, that's sexy. And with the continuation of Seven of Nine's spandex wardrobe, they clearly haven't heard of the phrase "too much".

I know which one *I* think looks sexier, and it ain't the one with the bad haircut.

[Perinquus]

Whettestone makes a point about sexiness as compared to sluttiness when he reviews 'Broken Bow' .

We want sexy, not slutty.

What was the sexiest appearance of a female Vulcan? Think back to Kirstie Alley on Star Trek 2. What was the sexiest scene? When she was in the turbolift with Kirk. Saavik was in uniform all day, then suddenly shows up in a loose white robe and her hair down.

But B&B decide instead to give us a slutty Vulcan who dances around in a catsuit 24/7. Yeah, that's sexy. And with the continuation of Seven of Nine's spandex wardrobe, they clearly haven't heard of the phrase "too much".

I know which one *I* think looks sexier, and it ain't the one with the bad haircut.

Quite true, Kirstie Alley was quite the sexy thing back in the day. Pity she had to go and put on so much weight later in life (she's quite the heifer now, quel dommage, and a scientologist to boot). If they'd give Blalock a decent hairdut, and not have her parade around in a catsuit 24/7 (B&B need to understand it sexier to be enticed by periodic glimpses than beaten over the head with constant overexposure) it would improve her sex appeal by orders of magnitude. But they don't understand what makes a woman really sexy any more than they understand what makes a TV series great.

[Vympel]

Isn't that the site that says that T'Pol looks like someone starved her, beat the shit out of her etc?

She's bloody ugly I'm sorry. Her face is awful and her sucks ass.

[Vympel]

I meant her HAIR sucks ass. Dumb bitch.

[Vendetta]

Supposedly Roddenberry used to tweak every script that came his way, whether it needed it or not, so he would have a reason for getting his name on there. All for the $$$$. Pretty interesting since he's the one who pushed for the cashless Federation of TNG.

I think Roddenberry was interested more in keeping copyright control of the work than making money from it.

Same reason he insisted on writing some lyrics for the Star Trek theme, so that he kept the IP in his own hands.

[Captain tycho]

Supposedly Roddenberry used to tweak every script that came his way, whether it needed it or not, so he would have a reason for getting his name on there. All for the $$$$. Pretty interesting since he's the one who pushed for the cashless Federation of TNG.

I think Roddenberry was interested more in keeping copyright control of the work than making money from it.

Same reason he insisted on writing some lyrics for the Star Trek theme, so that he kept the IP in his own hands.

He probably didn't want it fucked up by worthless writers like B&B.
Then he died.
May his spirit smite B&B from our mortal world!

[Scorpius]

Supposedly Roddenberry used to tweak every script that came his way, whether it needed it or not, so he would have a reason for getting his name on there. All for the $$$$. Pretty interesting since he's the one who pushed for the cashless Federation of TNG.

I think Roddenberry was interested more in keeping copyright control of the work than making money from it.

Same reason he insisted on writing some lyrics for the Star Trek theme, so that he kept the IP in his own hands.

There are lyrics??

[Captain tycho]

Supposedly Roddenberry used to tweak every script that came his way, whether it needed it or not, so he would have a reason for getting his name on there. All for the $$$$. Pretty interesting since he's the one who pushed for the cashless Federation of TNG.

I think Roddenberry was interested more in keeping copyright control of the work than making money from it.

Same reason he insisted on writing some lyrics for the Star Trek theme, so that he kept the IP in his own hands.

There are lyrics??

It consists of 'Ohhh whooo' ohoh-whowho,' something like that.
Not really lyrics.
Or do you mean something else?

[Scorpius]

Thought you meant actual WORDS that were an alternate version of the main intro for TOS, not what's actually on TV for TOS. Would 'Ohhh whooo' ohoh-whowho,' actually qualify as lyrics someone would pay him for?

Anything Gene could come up with would be better than that "Faith of the Heart" crap...

[Vendetta]

Thought you meant actual WORDS that were an alternate version of the main intro for TOS, not what's actually on TV for TOS. Would 'Ohhh whooo' ohoh-whowho,' actually qualify as lyrics someone would pay him for?

Anything Gene could come up with would be better than that "Faith of the Heart" crap...

There are actual lyrics.

They appear in one episode, and are on some of the CDs the cast released when they used to pretend they could sing.

Hearing them sung would be a painful thing.

[Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi]

Thought you meant actual WORDS that were an alternate version of the main intro for TOS, not what's actually on TV for TOS. Would 'Ohhh whooo' ohoh-whowho,' actually qualify as lyrics someone would pay him for?

Anything Gene could come up with would be better than that "Faith of the Heart" crap...

There are actual lyrics.

They appear in one episode, and are on some of the CDs the cast released when they used to pretend they could sing.

Hearing them sung would be a painful thing.

Judging by the way Enterprise is going, B&B is probalby going to write a theme song sometime soon, a corny/crappy one. It will probably be like the theme song to some TV sitcom.

Look in the air, it's the Enterprise!
A wonderful sight in the skies!
(continues on, sung to corny music)

[Zoink]

Was just watching a TNG episode last night, the one where the "professor" travels back in time (although it turns out he's actually from the past) to observe the Enterprise during a mission... in it, Worf states that the most important development since the 22nd century were phasers... because the "22nd century didn't have phasers"..... isn't "Enterprise" set in the 22nd century???

[TheDarkling]

Zoink: Phase canons not phasers, according to B&B if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck and quacks like a duck it must be a.... deer.

[Zoink]

Zoink: Phase canons not phasers, according to B&B if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck and quacks like a duck it must be a.... deer.

There's a problem in either case, Worf stated that the phaser was the most important development since the 22nd century because they didn't have phasers in that century. If phase canons are something completely different, they still have in the 22nd century something very similar, with similar abilities... making the development of the phaser not that special.

However, both cases can be explained by stating that "Worf is an idiot".... I just prefer to use the "B&B are idiots" explanation because watching a show about a crew full of idiots is boring (example: Voyager).