Hahah, JWs just knocked

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2006-04-10 05:05am

That was cool, some jehovah's witnesses just called, and I answered the door with my hair wet from the shower in my dressing gown. They tried to give me a watchtower thing that said "a remedy for death" and I laughed at them. They then tried to say they were here to bring me bible-based good messages, so I laughed again, said I was knowledgeable on religion and invited them in for a talk.

They declined because I was half naked and said they'd come back at another time to talk it over... will they? I hope so. I'll wear my Deicide "fuck your god" Tshirt with Jesus in a straight jacket on it.

I hope they come back today, I'll go googling in a minute and find the watchtower citations for racism.

Chardok · Post by **Chardok** » 2006-04-10 08:06am

Do you have a "Jesus is F*@#in' Metal" T-shirt? I think that would be a more fitting slap in the face from a long-haired hippie such as yourself

.

EDIT____________

Christ.....grammar...

Rogue 9 · Post by **Rogue 9** » 2006-04-10 10:01am

I had some show up at my apartment a couple weeks ago.

Hotfoot · Post by **Hotfoot** » 2006-04-10 10:11am

While the fact that they are door-to-door salesmen for religion is, by its very nature, annoying, I don't have the inclination or the time to give them a good runaround. I'd rather send them on their way and be done with them.

Lord Zentei · Post by **Lord Zentei** » 2006-04-10 07:18pm

Meh, just their penchant for pushing back their estimates of when the End Times occour is enough to mark them out as nutters.

Why do all fundies obsess over the End Times so much anyhow. "Oh, you're living in the End Times. Aren't you special".

Spanky The Dolphin · Post by **Spanky The Dolphin** » 2006-04-10 07:24pm

Rye, you should answer the door in that vinyl maid outfit of yours, or anything else appropriately fetishistic.

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2006-04-10 08:33pm

Spanky The Dolphin wrote:Rye, you should answer the door in that vinyl maid outfit of yours, or anything else appropriately fetishistic.

In fact, take it further. Consider it your goal to make the poor JWs pop a raging boner!

Where you take the situation at that point is up to you...

Post by **LadyTevar** » 2006-04-10 09:23pm

What I wanna know is did they think Rye was male or female?

Enigma · Post by **Enigma** » 2006-04-10 10:33pm

Lord Zentei wrote:Meh, just their penchant for pushing back their estimates of when the End Times occour is enough to mark them out as nutters.

Why do all fundies obsess over the End Times so much anyhow. "Oh, you're living in the End Times. Aren't you special".

Since when have they pushed back a date that hasn't been set?

Lord Zentei · Post by **Lord Zentei** » 2006-04-12 07:03pm

Enigma wrote:
Lord Zentei wrote:Meh, just their penchant for pushing back their estimates of when the End Times occour is enough to mark them out as nutters.

Why do all fundies obsess over the End Times so much anyhow. "Oh, you're living in the End Times. Aren't you special".
Since when have they pushed back a date that hasn't been set?

You're joking, right?

That NOS Guy · Post by **That NOS Guy** » 2006-04-12 07:26pm

Lord Zentei wrote:
You're joking, right?

He's a JW dude.

Lord Zentei · Post by **Lord Zentei** » 2006-04-12 08:05pm

That NOS Guy wrote:
Lord Zentei wrote:
You're joking, right?
He's a JW dude.

I know.

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2006-04-12 08:19pm

Lord Zentei wrote:
That NOS Guy wrote:
Lord Zentei wrote:
You're joking, right?
He's a JW dude.
I know.

We all do.

Enigma · Post by **Enigma** » 2006-04-12 09:16pm

Lord Zentei wrote:
Enigma wrote:
Lord Zentei wrote:Meh, just their penchant for pushing back their estimates of when the End Times occour is enough to mark them out as nutters.

Why do all fundies obsess over the End Times so much anyhow. "Oh, you're living in the End Times. Aren't you special".
Since when have they pushed back a date that hasn't been set?
You're joking, right?

no joke. I'd like to know.

Lord Zentei · Post by **Lord Zentei** » 2006-04-12 09:45pm

Enigma wrote:no joke. I'd like to know.

Beginning in 1914, when the rapture did not occour right through to 1975 when they finally gave up on specific dates.

Enigma · Post by **Enigma** » 2006-04-12 10:11pm

Lord Zentei wrote:
Enigma wrote:no joke. I'd like to know.
Beginning in 1914, when the rapture did not occour right through to 1975 when they finally gave up on specific dates.

True on the first one. The date 1914 was predicted as a date of great importance. Back then we first thought that the rapture would come but when that year came and went it didn't happen. All that happened was WW1. 1975 was never recognized as a year of great importance, but was generally viewed as the 6,000th year of human existence.

After 1914 we never set any specific date other than time is short.

Lord Zentei · Post by **Lord Zentei** » 2006-04-12 10:26pm

Enigma wrote:After 1914 we never set any specific date other than time is short.

O RLY?

From an older thread:

The Dark wrote:Quotes from various members of the Watchtower Society:

Charles Taze Russell, 1889 wrote:...we consider it an established truth that the final end of the kingdoms of this world, and the full establishment of the Kingdom of God, will be accomplished by the end of A.D. 1914

The Time Is At Hand, 1915 wrote:The Gentile Times prove that the present governments must all be overthrown about the close of A.D. 1915; and Parallelism above shows that this period corresponds exactly with the year A.D. 70, which witnessed the completion of the downfall of the Jewish polity.

The Finished Mystery, 1917 wrote:...in the year 1918, when God destroys the churches wholesale and the church members by millions, it shall be that any that escape shall come to the works of Pastor Russell to learn the meaning of the downfall of Christianity.

J. E. Rutherford, 1918 wrote:...there will be a resurrection of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, and other faithful ones of old ... we may expect 1925 to witness the return of these faithful men of Israel from the condition of death, being resurrected and fully restored to perfect humanity and made the visible, legal representatives of the new order of things on earth.... Therefore we may confidently expect that 1925 will mark the return of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and the faithful prophets of old, particularly those named by the Apostle in Hebrews 11, to the condition of human perfection.

J. E. Rutherford, 1922 wrote:We understand that the jubilee type began to count in 1575 B.C.; and the 3,500 year period embracing the type must end in 1925....It follows, then, that the year 1925 will mark the beginning of the restoration of all things lost by Adam's disobedience.

The Watchtower, August 15, 1968 wrote:Are we to assume from this study that the battle of Armageddon will be all over by the autumn of 1975, and the long-looked-for thousand-year reign of Christ will begin by then? Possibly, but we wait to see how closely the seventh thousand-year period of man’s existence coincides with the sabbathlike thousand-year reign of Christ....Our chronology, however, which is reasonably accurate (but admittedly not infallible), at the best only points to the autumn of 1975 as the end of 6,000 years of man’s existence on earth.
Charles Russell (the first man quoted) was the founder of what is now the Jehovah's Witnesses. J. E. Rutherford (fourth and fifth quotes) was the second leader of the organization.

Lord Zentei · Post by **Lord Zentei** » 2006-04-12 10:36pm

Enigma wrote:True on the first one. The date 1914 was predicted as a date of great importance. Back then we first thought that the rapture would come but when that year came and went it didn't happen. All that happened was WW1. 1975 was never recognized as a year of great importance, but was generally viewed as the 6,000th year of human existence.

BTW: As the quote above shows, it was the "full establishment of the Kingdom of God" that was to have been completed by 1914. It was not just a genrerically "important date".

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2006-04-12 10:54pm

I vote this thread be moved to OT or SLAM

GG Lady Zentei

Enigma · Post by **Enigma** » 2006-04-12 10:56pm

Lord Zentei wrote:
Enigma wrote:True on the first one. The date 1914 was predicted as a date of great importance. Back then we first thought that the rapture would come but when that year came and went it didn't happen. All that happened was WW1. 1975 was never recognized as a year of great importance, but was generally viewed as the 6,000th year of human existence.
BTW: As the quote above shows, it was the "full establishment of the Kingdom of God" that was to have been completed by 1914. It was not just a genrerically "important date".

In heaven yes, we also believe that Christ began ruling that kingdom on 1914. But at that time we thought the rapture was going to happen but only years later that we figured that 1914 was important for a different reason. But *1975* was just a milestone of sorts not the end of the world.

Lord Zentei · Post by **Lord Zentei** » 2006-04-12 11:02pm

Oh horseshit. The FULL establishment of the Kingdom of God refers to the Earth: are you insinuating that the Kingdom of God was not established before that time?

But *1975* was just a milestone of sorts not the end of the world.

Nonsense:

Are we to assume from this study that the battle of Armageddon will be all over by the autumn of 1975, and the long-looked-for thousand-year reign of Christ will begin by then? Possibly, but we wait to see how closely the seventh thousand-year period of man’s existence coincides with the sabbathlike thousand-year reign of Christ....Our chronology, however, which is reasonably accurate (but admittedly not infallible), at the best only points to the autumn of 1975 as the end of 6,000 years of man’s existence on earth.

They were clearly insinuating that 1975 was the date of the End Times.

Also, I note that you missed commenting on a few dates, there.

Solauren · Post by **Solauren** » 2006-04-12 11:05pm

1975 was the start of the end times.
IT's when my parents married to start the process that lead to my birth

(evil grin)

Enigma · Post by **Enigma** » 2006-04-13 07:56am

Surlethe, read the sentence afterwards where it said,

"Possibly, but we wait to see how closely the seventh thousand-year period of man’s existence coincides with the sabbathlike thousand-year reign of Christ"

Does that sound that we endorsed 1975? No. It was just a possibility not a definite fact. It was not the WB&TS that came up with the date. They only said it could be a possibility. The questions were raised by a few JWs if that date meant the arrival of Armaggedon.

EDIT: The Kingdom of God existed before but Christ began reigning as king on 1914.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2006-04-13 10:39am

After 1914 we never set any specific date other than time is short.

If "time is short" includes >90 years, I still think you end up looking silly with such predictions.

This 6000th year of humanity is fucking hilarious too, why are JWs so opposed to archeology, biology and sanity anyway?

I mean, my mum's a haemotologist, right, so what possible argument would a JW give to her to get her not to transfuse blood into a baby that will die if she doesn't?

She also tells me that they have a lot of JWs that come in and deny blood transfusions, but they actually want to be saved and are just held in place by retarded peer pressure. So yeah, people die and the hospital doesn't get sued, but hey, the soul is okay.

SirNitram · Post by **SirNitram** » 2006-04-13 10:56am

I'm not going into whether Jesus' grace saving you from Hell.

But it is by SirNitram's grace that this thread is rescued from Testing, on the basis it is an actual debate/discussion. Spamming it up will be met with terminal force.