If so, go for it. Mine are so filthy that they may kill the thread before contributing, so I'll wait.
A good dirty joke can bring a little joy to a miserable day, so consider this a public service.
Anyone up for some filthy jokes?
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Bug-Eyed Earl
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I'm pretty sure that's a real event, except the guy wasn;t dyslexic.
This day is Fantastic!
Myers Briggs: ENTJ
Political Compass: -3/-6
DOOMer WoW
"I really hate it when the guy you were pegging as Mr. Worst Case starts saying, "Oh, I was wrong, it's going to be much worse." " - Adrian Laguna
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Kosh_The_Vorlon
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Nope, he was just nervous
There is no God.
But it does not matter.
Man is enough.
Edna St. Vincent Milay, Conversation at Midnight
There will never be a resolution in the evolution vs creationism debate because neither side can conclusively prove that they are right. The creationists can't prove that they're right becuase they're not, and the evolutionists can't prove that they're right because the creationists are too damn stupid to listen.
HemlockGrey
But it does not matter.
Man is enough.
Edna St. Vincent Milay, Conversation at Midnight
There will never be a resolution in the evolution vs creationism debate because neither side can conclusively prove that they are right. The creationists can't prove that they're right becuase they're not, and the evolutionists can't prove that they're right because the creationists are too damn stupid to listen.
HemlockGrey
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IRG CommandoJoe
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I thought a dirty joke involved sex? A dirty joke could be anything with curses in it?
Who's the more foolish, the fool or the fool who follows him? -Obi-Wan Kenobi
"In the unlikely event that someone comes here, hates everything we stand for, and then donates a big chunk of money anyway, I will thank him for his stupidity." -Darth Wong, Lord of the Sith
Proud member of the Brotherhood of the Monkey.
"In the unlikely event that someone comes here, hates everything we stand for, and then donates a big chunk of money anyway, I will thank him for his stupidity." -Darth Wong, Lord of the Sith
Proud member of the Brotherhood of the Monkey.
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Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi
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Heard this one at a used bookstore the other day. It uses props.
You lay out 3 American pennies and ask "What kind of car do you see there?"
The answer is Lincoln.
Then you say "What kind of snake do you see there?"
The answer here is Copperhead.
Then you say "What kind of pussy do you see there?"
The answer is "And you won't for three cents."
You lay out 3 American pennies and ask "What kind of car do you see there?"
The answer is Lincoln.
Then you say "What kind of snake do you see there?"
The answer here is Copperhead.
Then you say "What kind of pussy do you see there?"
The answer is "And you won't for three cents."
「かかっ―」
You asked for it!
Once upon a time, there was a young man we'll call Tom. On his thirteenth birthday, Tom's father decided to give him the 'facts of life' speech. However, Tom's father had his own views on things, and so gives Tom this advice: "If you're ever really horny, there's nothing wrong with going down to the brothel. But don't get Sandpaper Sally!"
A few years later, Tom was quite horny. So, he decided to head down to the brothel. Unfortunately, the pimp explained that all of his ladies were 'occupied'...except for Sandpaper Sally. Remembering his dad's advice, Tom decides to wait for a half hour. Everyone's still busy, except for Sandpaper Sally. Tom waits some more. Finally, in desperation, he decides he'll settle for Sally.
Well, needless to say, they end up in one of the brothel's rooms. As they start to have sex, though, it hurts; Tom figures this is why she's called Sandpaper Sally. Finally, he says in exasperation: "Damn, bitch! Can't you do something about that?" Sally nods and retreats into the bathroom. Tom hears the most awful screaming and hollering you can imagine. Sally returns in a few minutes, though, and they go back at it; it no longer hurts. "Phew, that's much better. What did you do?"
Sandpaper Sally gives him a 'don't-you-already-know-that?' look, and replies: "Why, I popped the blisters."
A few years later, Tom was quite horny. So, he decided to head down to the brothel. Unfortunately, the pimp explained that all of his ladies were 'occupied'...except for Sandpaper Sally. Remembering his dad's advice, Tom decides to wait for a half hour. Everyone's still busy, except for Sandpaper Sally. Tom waits some more. Finally, in desperation, he decides he'll settle for Sally.
Well, needless to say, they end up in one of the brothel's rooms. As they start to have sex, though, it hurts; Tom figures this is why she's called Sandpaper Sally. Finally, he says in exasperation: "Damn, bitch! Can't you do something about that?" Sally nods and retreats into the bathroom. Tom hears the most awful screaming and hollering you can imagine. Sally returns in a few minutes, though, and they go back at it; it no longer hurts. "Phew, that's much better. What did you do?"
Sandpaper Sally gives him a 'don't-you-already-know-that?' look, and replies: "Why, I popped the blisters."
