Best Farscape Line

Sokar · Post by **Sokar** » 2002-07-04 03:42am

For me its from the most recent episode,
Crichton:(to Capt. Braka and a full squad of Peacekeeper Commandos)
"Braka , your a man of the world right? Tell me the truth, do these pants...make my ass look big?"

For thoes unfamiliar with Farscape , Crichton and Braka have a bit of history, Crichton has beaten the hell out of Baraka on two occasions and dared him on seveal occasions to go for round three, plus Crichton never misses an opportunity to jab Braka ..... I think that Baraka for all his bluster is more than a little afraid of the half crazed Human.....

Whats your fave ?

Shadowhawk · Post by **Shadowhawk** » 2002-07-04 04:41am

Basically any of the banter between Crichton & Dargo, of course.

Particularly the
Crichton: "Who's your daddy?"
Dargo: "I'm your daddy!"
line when they're kicking some ass somewhere (I think the episode with the truth-detecting lobster and the duplicitious children of a planet's ruler.)

One of my favorites was in the latest season opener, when those aliens have invaded the dying Leviathen to harvest its neural tissue. I had decided that they were a lot like Klingons early in the episode, and later on, Crichton starts calling them Klingons. It was great.

David · Post by **David** » 2002-07-04 01:32pm

Crichton: "Who's your daddy?"
Dargo: "I'm your daddy!"

Lol

Imperial Royal Guard · Post by **Imperial Royal Guard** » 2002-07-05 12:38am

"Show of force, its the only thing Klingons understand!" - Crichton

he actually yelled out at them in klingon once...

Grand Admiral Thrawn · Post by **Grand Admiral Thrawn** » 2002-07-05 08:30am

Imperial Royal Guard wrote:"Show of force, its the only thing Klingons understand!" - Crichton

he actually yelled out at them in klingon once...

Heh...

XaLEv · Post by **XaLEv** » 2002-07-05 10:16am

Shadowhawk wrote:Basically any of the banter between Crichton & Dargo, of course.

Particularly the
Crichton: "Who's your daddy?"
Dargo: "I'm your daddy!"
line when they're kicking some ass somewhere (I think the episode with the truth-detecting lobster and the duplicitious children of a planet's ruler.)

Actually, it was more like "Dargo, tell him who his daddy is."

AltoidMaster · Post by **AltoidMaster** » 2002-07-06 03:21am

I liked the episode of where that wierd light guy goes on the Leviathan ( relatively early in the season) and the crew finally realizes it, they dress Chricton up in the reflective material. Chrichton then proceeds to fling out a sword, and cast back his cloak in a heroic gesture.

Everyone else: We're going to die.

And I also loved the part earlier in the episode where they read off the basin and Chrichton can't ;-P

Dead on Arrival · Post by **Dead on Arrival** » 2002-07-06 03:56am

D'Argo: Well, now I can speak truth and that comes as good and bad news.
John: Alright, give me the bad news first.
D'Argo: The bad news is that you are married and you must endure as a statue for eighty cycles in a strange world.
John: What's the good news.
D'Argo: Chiana and I are having fantastic sex.

Season 2 - Look at the Princess Part 2: I Do, I Think

Post by **Rob Wilson** » 2002-07-06 11:28am

Dead on Arrival wrote:D'Argo: Well, now I can speak truth and that comes as good and bad news.
John: Alright, give me the bad news first.
D'Argo: The bad news is that you are married and you must endure as a statue for eighty cycles in a strange world.
John: What's the good news.
D'Argo: Chiana and I are having fantastic sex.

Season 2 - Look at the Princess Part 2: I Do, I Think

Seconded.

Kosh_The_Vorlon · Post by **Kosh_The_Vorlon** » 2002-07-08 09:50pm

Old Woman: And I..Am the woman! *takes her top off*
Chrichton: OHmigod!
D'Argo: DAAYYYEEEE!!!!!!!

CNS Sarajevo · Post by **CNS Sarajevo** » 2002-07-09 11:36am

"Thank you very much, miss private moment three hundred and fifty-four."

"Can I get a HELL YEAH!"

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2002-10-02 10:57pm

Few of my favorites:

John Crichton: Have we sent the "Don't shoot, we're pathetic" transmission yet?

John Crichton: Welcome to the Federation Starship SS Buttcrack!
[Slaps his own rear end]

John Crichton: Aeryn, if Scorpius gets me...
Aeryn Sun: I know, shoot you.
John Crichton: No! No, no. Shoot him!

Neeyala: We were regaining dimensionality when our ships collided and must've been subjected to a massive burst of photonic distortion. Once the phaztillon generator is repaired, we'll dose ourselves and hope your living ship doesn't interfere with the non-thermal dimensional forces.
Aeryn Sun: Do you understand any of those words?
John Crichton: Yeah, I watched all kinds of Star Trek, it's just the order that they're in.

John Crichton: Haven't you read the Super Villain's Handbook? This is where you're supposed to twirl your mustache and gloat.

Shaka[Zulu] · Post by **Shaka[Zulu]** » 2002-10-03 12:51am

a couple of my faves... well, from this 1 ep at least...

Crichton: you call that a restorative??? try purgative!
Naranti: here, this will help with the cramps...
Chrichton: you'd better get away from me before I spew on you!

sputnik: this was yours, so this must be D'Argos'
pip: nope, thats crichtons... this is D'Argos' (takes a taste)
sputnik (eyes bugging out): NO living creature could produce THAT!

<Pip & Sputnik (aka Chiana & Sikozu) trying to figure out D'argos ship>

sputnik: pointless flailing is useless Chiana... move aside and let me...
pip: <interrupts> I am the one who put their hands in the vomit... you want a turn, go get your own!

note I think thats how it went...

D'Argo: that was Lolaa's cannon... someone is in my ship
John: gotta be the girls, but howd they get your bodily fluids?
D' : dont go there

and from a later ep....

john: yo D, Im havin trouble keepin her steady... need some more DNA
D: <spits in John's hand>
john: I hate this ship... it's so... messy...

Patrick Degan · Post by **Patrick Degan** » 2002-10-03 01:42am

Chricton is trying, for the umpteenth time, to fix Moya before they end up going straight to hell, and he's in the starburst chamber with one of the DRD's, trying to get information from it. The DRD just blinks, bleeps, and whistles as usual.

"OK, screw this R2D2 crap, we'll go with the Star Trek system (gestures) One blink for 'yes', two blinks for 'no'."

Later, we discover he's designated the little bot "DRD Pike".

Slartibartfast · Post by **Slartibartfast** » 2002-10-03 02:22am

Shadowhawk wrote:Basically any of the banter between Crichton & Dargo, of course.

Particularly the
Crichton: "Who's your daddy?"
Dargo: "I'm your daddy!"
line when they're kicking some ass somewhere (I think the episode with the truth-detecting lobster and the duplicitious children of a planet's ruler.)

One of my favorites was in the latest season opener, when those aliens have invaded the dying Leviathen to harvest its neural tissue. I had decided that they were a lot like Klingons early in the episode, and later on, Crichton starts calling them Klingons. It was great.

D'Argo/Crichton banter = gold

Slartibartfast · Post by **Slartibartfast** » 2002-10-03 02:38am

Meh, just post the friggin' link, instead of posting them one by one

:

http://us.imdb.com/Quotes?0187636

BTW from that page, the one you're talking about is:

John Crichton: You've been lyin' to your daddy, boy, and you know you shouldn't lie to your daddy! It's gonna stop. Who's your daddy? C'mon, you know who your daddy is. Who's your daddy? D'Argo, tell him who his daddy is.
General Ka D'Argo: I'M your daddy!

Slartibartfast · Post by **Slartibartfast** » 2002-10-03 02:54am

This one is particularly good:

Rygel: I'm nobody's puppet!

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2002-10-03 12:43pm

Yeah, that a good one. Excellent joke

Post by **Kuja** » 2002-10-03 04:04pm

In the first episode:

John: You fart helium?
Rygel: It's a perfectly natural bodily function...

Larz · Post by **Larz** » 2002-10-03 07:05pm

I like how he calls his scorpios mind clone Harvey

.

CNS Sarajevo · Post by **CNS Sarajevo** » 2002-10-03 08:15pm

Crichton: "Freeze, or I'll plug you full of....little....yellow...bolts of light!"

Aeryn: "I know, it hurts, and you want the pain to stop. Well next time, HOLD ON TO THE FRELLING WALL!"

Crais: "Do you understand these rights as I've read them to you? Do you, punk???"
Crichton: "No."
Crais: "Then I can't arrest you!"

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2002-10-04 02:53am

If Dargo/Chrightien banter is Gold
Then Aeren/Chrighten double entendres =silver

so what's Planium and Copper?

Slartibartfast · Post by **Slartibartfast** » 2002-10-04 11:39am

No idea what Planium is

This one is from the "Crichton's Notes" section in scifi.com:

TRANSLATOR MICROBES

...

"As good as the little guys are, though, they don't always catch everything. Sometimes words slip through that are untranslatable. Things like proper names, unique customs, and swear words. (Especially swear words!)

For instance, when D'Argo heats up I'm sure he has a mouth like a drunken sailor. But my microbes never manage to translate his actual words. All I hear are growls, grunts, and a few random syllables. It has the unintended effect of turning all my conversations PG-13, as if I've got my own built-in V-chip. Some days, I feel like I've landed in Mister Rogers' Galaxy."

Post by **Kuja** » 2002-10-04 01:44pm

I think he means platinum.

TrailerParkJawa · Post by **TrailerParkJawa** » 2002-10-04 06:33pm

I dont remember what episode but Crichton says " Me, Jose Jimenez."

StarDestroyer.Net BBS

Best Farscape Line

Best Farscape Line

Best Trek/Wars in-joke