National Review's list of top 50 conservative rock songs

[Pablo Sanchez]

7. “Revolution,” by The Beatles.
“You say you want a revolution / Well you know / We all want to change the world . . . Don’t you know you can count me out?” What’s more, Communism isn’t even cool: “If you go carrying pictures of Chairman Mao / You ain’t going to make it with anyone anyhow.” (Someone tell the Che Guevara crowd.)

Are you fucking kidding me? That song was written by John Fucking Lennon; this John J. Miller dickwad apparently knows nothing about music and is a moron to boot. I guess I have to applaud the National Review for giving jobs to people with severe mental disabilities.

Half of the songs on that list are only conservative if you interpret both the songs and the politics that they're talking about in the most distorted, obtuse fashion possible. Going back to "Revolution," Lennon wrote the song about rejecting the violence and cults of personality that characterized the extreme left wing--therefore it's a conservative song? And "Cult of Personality?" How is a song about questioning all established authorities and the media considered conservative? And "Sympathy for the Devil" is not satirical, they're being fucking serious, you assfuck.

All in all, I view this article from the National Review as a deadly insult to something I love--rock music. I hope John J. Miller gets accidentally shot by Ted Nugent.

[Gil Hamilton]

Very much so, but that even to this day doesn't stop the song from being used to invoke patriotism.

Mostly by people like the National Review, who have never listened to the song but have read the title.

It seems like alot of that list seems to be taking anti-authority songs and songs about bad situations and twisting them into some sort of mastubatory fantasy conservative song, without understanding the context or the band singing them? I wonder how Aerosmith feels about the National Review turning "Janie's Got A Gun", a song about sexual abuse on children and a girl getting sent to jail for offing her abusive father, into a song about how the second Amendment is protecting women from sexual predators.

[Spacebeard]

How is a song about questioning all established authorities and the media considered conservative?

Come on, don't you know that it's liberals that are now "the establishment", and it's conservatives that are "against the system", fighting against pervasive liberal media bias and the soulless nanny state! Even with conservatives controlling both Congress and the White House, it's still a dangerous struggle against the oppressive power of "Hollywood liberals"! That's why they like rock music so much!



Seriously, it does seem that the right-wing has been portraying itself as "anti-establishment" for the past few years, probably in an effort to attract the young. Co-opting generic anti-authority rock songs as somehow being "conservative" is just a part of this.

[Gil Hamilton]

Conservatives have always tried to portray themselves as all about personal freedom and small government, and protraying the Left as Big Government Finger in Every Pie and a Tax on Everything Nanny States. However, if there has been a time that Conservatives have actually practiced that, I've yet to have heard of it.

[Darth Wong]

One of the most amazing qualities of conservatives is their capacity for self-delusion. Never has such a powerful, privileged, spoiled-rotten group been so utterly convinced that it was being persecuted since the rich white Southern plantation slave owners before the US Civil War.

[Spin Echo]

I find it rather ironic that the Rainmakers are on the list. They were initially a consevative band until they became big in Norway, of all places. A few tours around Scandinavia and they become good little socialists, writing lyrics like:

Spend it on love, spend it on the children
Spend it on the ones who need it the most

and

I hear of a country where they say the cities
All have pretty streets that are paved with gold
They may not be gold but they were built by people
Paying heavy taxes for a dream they still hold

[Spyder]

If the media was really that liberal you'd think they would have brought attention to the fact that there are a lot of fairly liberal countries out there that do quite well. Things like the fact that in some countries higher education doesn't cost a cent, in others you actually get paid a wage to go. Hospital stays don't have to be a big deal, even if you haven't been forking out large sums of money to an insurance company which will be looking for any possible reason not to cover you.

Just a few comparrisons between various situations and associated costs and benefits between people living in the US and people living elsewhere should turn a few heads.

[A-Wing_Slash]

My general reaction to this list is that it cannot decide wether it is supposed to be the 50 most conservative rock songs, or the 50 best rock songs that happen to be somewhat conservative. Also, while I would like to think that John Miller listened to all the songs on this list, I have a sneaky suspicion he did not. In addition I think that he defined conservatism too broadly, and being "anti-authority/anti-establishment" is pretty vague. And a third or so of the songs on the list aren't even slightly political, conservative or otherwise.

34. “Godzilla,” by Blue öyster Cult.
A 1977 classic about a big green monster — and more: “History shows again and again / How nature points up the folly of men.”

This doesn't even pretend to be conservative.

However, I have to disagree with some of what is being said about this list.

Are you fucking kidding me? That song was written by John Fucking Lennon; this John J. Miller dickwad apparently knows nothing about music and is a moron to boot.

Just because a song was written by someone who wasn't conservative doesn't mean the song itself isn't. It doesn't matter how un-conservative John Lennon and the other Beatles were/are. "Revolution" is a conservative song.

Going back to "Revolution," Lennon wrote the song about rejecting the violence and cults of personality that characterized the extreme left wing--therefore it's a conservative song?

Did you read what you wrote before you responded? "Rejecting the violence and cults of personality that characterized the extreme left wing?" The entire modern conservative movement was based upon rejecting and opposing the extreme left wing. "Revolution" is A) anti communist, B) against the radical protestors of the 60s-70s, and C) against sudden and drastic left wing political change. Therefore, it is a conservative song.

[Spyder]

Are you fucking kidding me? That song was written by John Fucking Lennon; this John J. Miller dickwad apparently knows nothing about music and is a moron to boot.

Just because a song was written by someone who wasn't conservative doesn't mean the song itself isn't. It doesn't matter how un-conservative John Lennon and the other Beatles were/are. "Revolution" is a conservative song.

Going back to "Revolution," Lennon wrote the song about rejecting the violence and cults of personality that characterized the extreme left wing--therefore it's a conservative song?

Did you read what you wrote before you responded? "Rejecting the violence and cults of personality that characterized the extreme left wing?" The entire modern conservative movement was based upon rejecting and opposing the extreme left wing. "Revolution" is A) anti communist, B) against the radical protestors of the 60s-70s, and C) against sudden and drastic left wing political change. Therefore, it is a conservative song.

Hint: You don't have to be conservative to think communism isn't a good idea. Incidentally, this is probably the nicest reply you're about to get.

[A-Wing_Slash]

Hint: You don't have to be conservative to think communism isn't a good idea.

I know. However, serious anti communism is one of the molst basic and definative conversative principles.

Incidentally, this is probably the nicest reply you're about to get.

I know.

[Gil Hamilton]

No, being anti-communist is an anyone with a brain principles. Being against communism was hijacked as a conservative idea, largely so they can accuse the other side as being communists or socialists.

[Joe]

Lennon probably was a communist, in any case, or at least he had communist sympathies. If not communism of the Soviet variety.

[Pablo Sanchez]

Incidentally, this is probably the nicest reply you're about to get.

Fucking A.

"Revolution" is a conservative song.

Have you ever listened to it, doofus?

Did you read what you wrote before you responded? "Rejecting the violence and cults of personality that characterized the extreme left wing?" The entire modern conservative movement was based upon rejecting and opposing the extreme left wing. "Revolution" is A) anti communist, B) against the radical protestors of the 60s-70s, and C) against sudden and drastic left wing political change. Therefore, it is a conservative song.

You are a fucking retard. So, if someone opposes the extremist Left, he is a conservative? I guess that means George Orwell, self-proclaimed Socialist and anti-Imperialist who fought for the ultra-Leftist POUM militia in the Spanish Civil War was actually conservative because he wrote the anti-Communist classic Animal Farm. Lyndon B. Johnson drastically increased American military efforts against the Viet Cong, so he must have been an arch-Conservative--which I guess makes perfect sense, considering his Great Society initiatives. Josip Broz "Tito," Communist dictator of Yugoslavia from 1944 to 1980, was anti-Soviet and implemented reforms that moved Yugoslavia from state-controlled Communism to Market Socialism; no doubt it would have shocked Tito to learn that he was actually a conservative!

The point here is that you're completely wrong. And stupid. Does Mommy tie your shoelaces for you in the morning, or do you just have those velcro straps? Because I'm sure a simple knot is too much for you to handle.

Moving onto the actual song "Revolution," here's the lyrics with parts that I bolded for emphasis.

You say you want a revolution
Well, you know
We all want to change the world
You tell me that it's evolution
Well, you know
We all want to change the world
But when you talk about destruction
Don't you know that you can count me out
Don't you know it's gonna be all right
all right, all right

You say you got a real solution
Well, you know
We'd all love to see the plan
You ask me for a contribution
Well, you know
We're doing what we can
But when you want money
for people with minds that hate
All I can tell is brother you have to wait
Don't you know it's gonna be all right
all right, all right
Ah

ah, ah, ah, ah, ah...

You say you'll change the constitution
Well, you know
We all want to change your head
You tell me it's the institution
Well, you know
You better free you mind instead
But if you go carrying pictures of chairman Mao
You ain't going to make it with anyone anyhow
Don't you know it's gonna be all right
all right, all right
all right, all right, all right
all right, all right, all right

"We all want to change the world," "you better free your mind instead," "we're doing what we can" (to help change the world). These don't sound very conservative to me, maybe you could point out to me which part of the fucking song is conservative. You dickcheese.

It's pretty clear to anyone with a brain that the song is about Lennon's ultra-Leftist. pacifist views. He's reproaching the Left Wing extremists not for being liberal, but for supporting violence and worshipping rotten bastards like Mao.

Lennon probably was a communist, in any case, or at least he had communist sympathies. If not communism of the Soviet variety.

If his public statements and songs were any indication, Lennon was a utopian Communist and pacifist--"Imagine" is the best example of this.

[Darth Wong]

Asshole_Slash has made an argument which contains an unspoken premise: the assumption that everyone who is not a "conservative" must be a Maoist. If you adopt that utterly outlandish and criminally ignorant assumption, then his argument makes sense. Otherwise, it's a steaming pile of cretinous bullshit. I guess that means it's cretinous bullshit either way.

[Spyder]

Incidentally, this is probably the nicest reply you're about to get.

Fucking A.

Yep, Ray Charles would have seen that one coming. Lets see if I can guess the response;
Something about communism being the ultimate form of liberalism perhaps, therefore conservatism is obviously the logical opposite?

[Joe]

And the fact that there's no Frank Zappa on this list is a huge oversight. Zappa was no conservative, but he hated hippies and his anti-hippie songs are some of the sharpest, most mean-spirited stuff you'll ever hear. Plus, Zappa was staunchly against recreational drug use. You'd think he would have at least listed some Zappa to give his list a bit more cred.

[The Yosemite Bear]

heh, anyone remember when the Reagan's tried to co-op this bit of lyrics?

"Born down in a deadman's town
first kick I took was when I hit the ground.
livin' like a dog that's been beat too much
'till you spend all your life just covering up.

corus

got into a little home town jam.*
so they put a rifle in my hand
sent me off to a foreign land
to go kill the yellow man.

corus

I had me a brother back in Khe-san
died north fighting the Viet cong
their still there he's all gone.
he had a woman back in siagon
got a picture of her in his arms.

corus

he said son if it was up to me.
went down to my VA man
he said son don't you understand

corus

down in the shadow of the penetentury]
I was fighting fires
they were fighting me
it's ten years down the road
I got nowhere to run
I got no where to go


*I was a dumb teenager who got a girl pregnant.

[weemadando]

An amusing blog on the list.

[Gil Hamilton]

Had Springsteen of let him use that, it would have been hilarious.

[Joe]

About the Dylan song; it is undoubtedly pro-Israel, but the album it came from (Infidels) was written while Dylan was coming off a born-again tangent, and it contains some of the harshest protest lyrics Dylan had written since the 1960s.

[Durandal]

According to this moron, Green Day's "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" is a conservative punk song because the lyrics "I walk a lonely road; The only one that I have ever known" endorse the idea of a self-made man and personal responsibility.

[A-Wing_Slash]

Asshole_Slash has made an argument which contains an unspoken premise: the assumption that everyone who is not a "conservative" must be a Maoist.

Please show me where in my earlier post I implied that. I do not believe that nor do I think that was part of my argument.

Lets see if I can guess the response;
Something about communism being the ultimate form of liberalism perhaps, therefore conservatism is obviously the logical opposite?

Nope. I'll try to explain what my thinking was. Anti communism is a definative principle for conservatives. If you asked a conservative (pre 1990's lets say, just for simplicity because communism was still around back then) what there political beliefs were, anti communism would be one of the central ones. However, being anti communist does not automatically make you a conservative. It merely means you agree with conservatives on the issue of communism. Or, that conservatives agree with you. Same difference.

So, if someone opposes the extremist Left, he is a conservative?

Nope. Not once have I said that Lennon himself was conservative. I think that it is pretty clear he is not. That being said (and assuming his political beliefs follow the words of the song), he appears to agree with conservatives on principle that extreme, Maoist/Stalinist communism is bad. That belief is a conservative one. Aparrently, it is also a "utopian Communist/pacifist" (lennon-ist) belief. Since this song expresses a belief that conservatives agree with, then it can be classified as a conservative song. It could also be a "utopian communist/pacifist" song, because on the issue that the song deals with, both politcal movements agree.

"We all want to change the world," "you better free your mind instead," "we're doing what we can" (to help change the world). These don't sound very conservative to me, maybe you could point out to me which part of the fucking song is conservative.

You say you want a revolution
Well, you know
We all want to change the world

Everybody, no matter there political belief, wants to change the world in some way. And the way this verse is said, it implies that Lennon is against, or at least hesitant towards "revolution." Sounds a bit conservative to me.

You tell me that it's evolution
Well, you know
We all want to change the world
But when you talk about destruction
Don't you know that you can count me out

I'll give you that this line is pacifist, and that pacifism is not conservative. However, loosely interpreted, this line just says that Lennon wants no part of communist violence and destruction. Thats kind of conservative. All in all, while tis verse may tend towards being un conservative, it doesn't counteract or outweigh the general message of the song.

Don't you know it's gonna be all right
all right, all right

I would interpret this verse as meaning that, either by leaving things the way they are, or by working through the system peacefully as opposed to a violent revolution, that things are going to "be all right." While maybe not strictly conservative, this definately tends towards conservatism.

You say you got a real solution
Well, you know
We'd all love to see the plan
You ask me for a contribution
Well, you know
We're doing what we can

This verse says no, I don't want to give you a "contribution," I'll do my own thing because I think my own thing will be better than your communism. Thats fairly conservative.

But when you want money
for people with minds that hate
All I can tell is brother you have to wait[
Don't you know it's gonna be all right
all right, all right
Ah

ah, ah, ah, ah, ah...

You say you'll change the constitution
Well, you know
We all want to change your head
You tell me it's the institution
Well, you know
You better free you mind instead

Now by "free your mind," does Lennon mean do drugs? If not, then this means that you should change your head instead of the constitution, and "free your mind" from revolutionary violent communist beliefs, because they are more of a problem than "the institution." Yup, thats conserative.

But if you go carrying pictures of chairman Mao
You ain't going to make it with anyone anyhow
Don't you know it's gonna be all right
all right, all right
all right, all right, all right
all right, all right, all right

This last bit with Mao is blatantly anti communist, and thus conservative.

Overall, this song was not writen as a conservative song. To Lennon, it would be a "utopian communist/pacifist" song. To someone with conservative beliefs, since this song agrees with there beliefs, it would be a conservative song.

[Gandalf]

Here's something for y'all.

No trust have we in prince or peer;
Our own right hand the chains must shiver.

...

We`re tricked by laws and regulations,
Our taxes strip us to the bone.

These songs sound about as conservative as other cherry picked lyrics on the list. The first one emphasises that the individual must work for his own destiny, and the second one is an advocate of low taxation.

Guess from which song they come? The internationale, which is sort of like a communist anthem. Lyrics.

EDIT: Tag issues.

[Pablo Sanchez]

Everybody, no matter there political belief, wants to change the world in some way.

Clearly you're so daft that you don't even know what conservatism is. Conservatism is by definition against change except when it is absolutely necessary. The idea of "changing the world" is anathema to a Conservative agenda. A "conservative" who does want to change the world is typically a reactionary.

And the way this verse is said, it implies that Lennon is against, or at least hesitant towards "revolution." Sounds a bit conservative to me.

You can't seriously be that dense. If something isn't revolutionary, it's conservative? That's an utterly insane black-and-white fallacy that lumps every non-revolutionary political party in existence into the conservative category. By your reasoning, Social Democrat parties (like the kind with 100% top income tax brackets and free medical care for everybody) are conservative. They fucking aren't.

I would interpret this verse as meaning that, either by leaving things the way they are, or by working through the system peacefully as opposed to a violent revolution, that things are going to "be all right." While maybe not strictly conservative, this definately tends towards conservatism.

You're retarded. Lennon is saying that everything will "be all right" to the extent that love, peace, and determination will be able to effect change where violence would fail. If you knew anything about Lennon, this would be obvious.

This verse says no, I don't want to give you a "contribution," I'll do my own thing because I think my own thing will be better than your communism. Thats fairly conservative.

That isn't what it's fucking saying, jackass!

Now by "free your mind," does Lennon mean do drugs?

Not in this case, clearly you're utterly unfamiliar with John Lennon. Maybe somebody like Raffi is more your speed.

If not, then this means that you should change your head instead of the constitution, and "free your mind" from revolutionary violent communist beliefs, because they are more of a problem than "the institution." Yup, thats conserative.

If you just reach a little farther you can grab yourself a cloud.

This last bit with Mao is blatantly anti communist, and thus conservative.

Once again the utterly and completely idiotic "Anti-communist = conservative" canard.

Overall, this song was not writen as a conservative song. To Lennon, it would be a "utopian communist/pacifist" song. To someone with conservative beliefs, since this song agrees with there beliefs, it would be a conservative song.

Oh, so if some jerkoff with a crack-addled brain (read: you) thinks that a song confirms his beliefs, it is necessarily so? Brilliant! Let's apply your ingenious concept to another classic Beatles tune: "Helter Skelter."

(1) Paul McCartney (who wrote the song) thought that "Helter Skelter" was a loud, fast, hard-rock sendup of a popular British amusement park ride also called the "Helter Skelter".

(2) Charles Manson believed that "Helter Skelter" was a prophetic song about a future race war, in which the blacks would rise up and slaughter white people, bringing about Armageddon--oh, and by the way, George, Paul, John, and Ringo represented the four horsemen of the apocalypse.

Now, according to your argument, both of these people are equally right.

[Joe]

According to this moron, Green Day's "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" is a conservative punk song because the lyrics "I walk a lonely road; The only one that I have ever known" endorse the idea of a self-made man and personal responsibility.

Is that off American Idiot? I haven't heard that one. Is that the whiny one that sounds like it was written and recorded in 1994? I just can't keep track of Green Day's songs, they all sound so different.