Stupid quotes.

jodathalas · Post by **jodathalas** » 2002-12-20 06:11pm

Just heard this. Thought I would share.

News reporter.: "There are more crimes in Britain now, due to the huge rise in the crime rate."

Sir Sirius · Post by **Sir Sirius** » 2002-12-20 06:38pm

LOL!

A few quotes from the worlds most powerfull moron:

As young Americans, you have an important responsibility, which is to become good citizens.
-- George W. Bush, in a June, 2001, letter to British students at Oakhill College in Lancashire, England.

No.
-- George W. Bush, responding to Dallas Morning News reporter Wayne Slater's 1998 question asking "Were you ever arrested after 1968?".

Yeah, Right!

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2002-12-20 09:43pm

No quoting Dubya. Too easy.

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2002-12-20 09:54pm

Well, not exactly relating to the thread, but amusing nonetheless:

"I hate quotations." Ralph Waldo Emerson

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2002-12-20 09:57pm

There are a lot of amusing quotes in poorly dubbed movies.

"I'll cut youe fats out, don't you believe me?", from "It's Now or Never", I believe.

Drewcifer · Post by **Drewcifer** » 2002-12-21 02:57am

I always got a kick out of Dan Qualye's flubs (and these aren't typos):

"In 1988, the question is whether we're going to go forward to tomorrow, or we're going to go past to the back."

"And the future will be better tomorrow."

"Bobby Knight told me this: there is nothing that a good defense can not beat a better offense."

"I was known as the cheif grave robber in my state."

"Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is in the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island, that is right here."

Shinova · Post by **Shinova** » 2002-12-21 03:29am

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi wrote:There are a lot of amusing quotes in poorly dubbed movies.

"I'll cut youe fats out, don't you believe me?", from "It's Now or Never", I believe.

Speaking of poorly dubbed things, one can always quote from that "all your base are belong to us" game

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2002-12-21 04:27am

"The Internet: More information on more subjects then you ever thought or wanted to know about"-Colin Witz

"Oh, my god it's full of Spam."-What if the Monolith had shown Dave Bowman AOL instead.

jodathalas · Post by **jodathalas** » 2002-12-21 06:18pm

"You cant make chicken salad out of chicken"

Sir Sirius · Post by **Sir Sirius** » 2002-12-21 06:28pm

"I know who I am. No one else knows who I am. If I was a giraffe and somebody said I was a snake, I'd think 'No, actually I am a giraffe.'
-- Richard Gere

jodathalas · Post by **jodathalas** » 2002-12-21 06:31pm

That one is pretty good.

A restaraunt sign.

Restrooms
Please
Wait for
Hostess
to seat you

Exonerate · Post by **Exonerate** » 2002-12-21 08:18pm

"No, I'm telling you, the kidney isn't on the left; its on the right!"

Enforcer Talen · Post by **Enforcer Talen** » 2002-12-21 10:47pm

http://www.goodquotes.com

paladin · Post by **paladin** » 2002-12-21 11:26pm

"It ain't over til it's over."

Post by **Zaia** » 2002-12-22 01:49am

This is my favourite from that website...

"Coming on to pitch is Mike Moore, who is six-foot-one and 212 years old." ~ Herb Score, Sportscaster ~

And I just have to add this one, since those blasted Aussies are always making jokes about stupid Americans. Yes, there ARE some dumb Aussies out there too. *sticks tongue out*

"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."
~ Former Australian cabinet minister Keppel Enderbery ~

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2002-12-23 12:30pm

Most of the dialogue from Plan 9 From Outer Space.

Phil Skayhan · Post by **Phil Skayhan** » 2002-12-23 01:22pm

paladin wrote:"It ain't over til it's over."

You gotta love Yogi. Most of them make sense in a strange way. My brother-in-law once showed why he said "When you come to a fork in the road take it". When you're driving to his house, what appears to be a fork is really only a curve in the road. The other is actually a driveway.

Now my favorite dumb quote:

"Is the complimentary champagne free?"

I was actually asked this once.

Morning Star · Post by **Morning Star** » 2002-12-23 02:46pm

Phil Skayhan wrote:
paladin wrote:"It ain't over til it's over."
Now my favorite dumb quote:

"Is the complimentary champagne free?"

I was actually asked this once.

What idiot said that?

irishmick79 · Post by **irishmick79** » 2002-12-23 02:54pm

Another Yogi Berra favorite....

"Half of this game is 90% mental."

ArmorPierce · Post by **ArmorPierce** » 2002-12-23 02:58pm

A crack in the event horizon is the dumbest quote I've ever heard.

Perinquus · Post by **Perinquus** » 2002-12-23 03:00pm

This one's an all time classic:

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." - Mariah Carey

Andrew J. · Post by **Andrew J.** » 2002-12-23 03:41pm

"You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there."-Yogi Berra

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2002-12-23 03:53pm

Eric Cantona (disgraced fench football player) "Seagulls follow the trawler in the hope that fish will be thrown back" or something like that.

jodathalas · Post by **jodathalas** » 2002-12-24 12:54pm

"We signed to play until the day we died, and we did."
Jimmy Greaves. ITV (U.K.)

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2002-12-24 02:53pm

I remember when after Saddam Hussein was "elected" a couple months back, and 100% of all voters voted for him, someone in the media thought it was a sign that Iraqis supported Hussein. I think the exact quote was something like this:

100% of all Iraqis went to the polls with the same thought: "Yes to Saddam Hussein"!

Of course, when you have no other option, what would you expect the results to be?