NFL Football Thread

Darth Garden Gnome · Post by **Darth Garden Gnome** » 2006-09-24 12:55am

With regards to the Lions... I can easily see them beating the Packers. Even when the Pack was good and the Lions were... the Lions, we still had a decent record against them. Now that they're shit, I expect Favre will throw out plenty of ill-advised passes and jump-balls into double teams and get burned all day long by the Lions shitty secondary. The defense, through sheer force of will, should get Detroit's first win of the year.

For all the Jags showed me last week, I'm still not going to give them any love. Indy wins. Different story if they ever happen to meet in the playoffs.

Medic · Post by **Medic** » 2006-09-24 02:39am

I am, cautiously as always with Marty Ball at the reigns, optimisitic.

Though I'm none too happy with the fact that my team, the Chargers has this, the 3rd week bye.

That the Raiders look even more impotent in years past, and QB troubles in KC and Denver, I hope to Bob we get to the post season [shit, last year was replete with a lot of shoulda-wons anyway]

What really cements my feelings though is getting Volek from the Titans; with Brees and Rivers, a Chargers fan could feel good that if he got whacked, you had a backup, but since we lost him from the team, this keeps depth at the QB spot. The secondary will still be a weak point unless they just gel or something. Best pass defense is always a good pass rush but I mean shit, Jammer better start getting INT's.

[and not once this year will I mention how the Chargers are in midseason form, god did that bite me in the ass]

Darth Garden Gnome · Post by **Darth Garden Gnome** » 2006-09-24 03:39pm

Apparently Favre decided to make this the only game of the year where he doesn't throw two or three crushing interceptions... Let the commentator wanking commence... geez...

Medic · Post by **Medic** » 2006-09-24 05:40pm

I was a little too apathetic to make picks this week but holy fucking shit! Seattle just put up 35 points in the 1st half against the NY Giants! And allowed none.

I for one, would like to see the 1st 70 point effort since... honestly I don't remember, the closest that comes to mind is Jacksonvilles 62-7 farewell to Dan Marino back when they were a playoff team with Boselli. Besides FUCK Eli 'I don't wanna go to San Diego waaah!' Manning.

Post by **Kuja** » 2006-09-25 11:17am

Why?! Why must we continue to insist on these retarded trick plays that always cause the game to fall apart?! To quote Jon Voight, "stick to the basics! Stick to the basics! Stick to the basics!" And protect the fucking quarterback!

Haminal10 · Post by **Haminal10** » 2006-09-25 12:29pm

Well that was an ugly win. Still, my Ravens are 3-0 for the first time in their history, so I guess I can't complain too much.

Bring on the Chargers!

Elfdart · Post by **Elfdart** » 2006-09-25 02:33pm

Haminal10 wrote:Well that was an ugly win. Still, my Ravens are 3-0 for the first time in their history, so I guess I can't complain too much.

Bring on the Chargers!

A win is a win, no matter how ugly. If the game is at 1PM EST in Baltimore, I'd pick the Ravens since West Coast teams playing the early game on the East Coast usually play badly.

What the fuck happened to Tampa Bay's QB? He got belted and had to have his spleen removed?

Carolina squeaked by as they always seem to do against the Buccaneers.

Not only did the 49ers get pimpslapped, they lost their two best players on the same fucked up play that should have been a 49er TD but instead had some fat tub of goo from the Eagles lumbering 98 yards for a score. D'OH!

The Jags should have won. They held Manning to two TDs, but gave up a punt return for a score that won the game for the Colts.

I watched the Patriots last night and boy do they suck right now. They got manhandled by Denver even though Jake Plummer only completed half his passes and his one big play was mostly the work of Javon Walker and two bungling Patriot DBs.

The Lions are actually playing pretty good offense except their main runner is an undisciplined weenie who won't hit the gap like he's supposed to, so their drives tend to fizzle. The Cards are another team that can't finish drives. The Titans played their best game yet and still lost to a clusterfuck Dolphins team. Cincinnatti reminds me of the Dallas Cowboys of about 14 years ago. They come out throwing, get the lead then drain the clock on offense -all while their defense goes headhunting as their opponents are force to throw every down to keep up. That's how the game should be played.

7-6 with one game to go. I guess it could be worse.

Darth Garden Gnome · Post by **Darth Garden Gnome** » 2006-09-25 04:04pm

I'm sure everyone will be high on the Saints tonight and I bet they'll be pumped and might have some success in the early going, but common football knowledge dictates that the Falcons are going to run the ball right up their assholes and make them look silly.

I hope Reggie at least has a good game, he's still got some electric moves in the pro game.

Darth Garden Gnome · Post by **Darth Garden Gnome** » 2006-09-25 10:33pm

Wow, I wasn't expecting this at the half. For what it's worth, I still think Atlanta will pull this one out, but I can examine two obvious problems the Falcons offense is suffering from right now:

Poor play calling. If they have a guy in Warrick Dunn who's averaging 100 yards a game, you'd damn well better run on first down. This is a guy who, three times out of four, will net 4+ on first down; far too many times I saw Vick passing instead. Of course, once they do run Dunn it's a draw play--excuse me? That's kiddie shit; save it for college ball. Line up in the goddamn I-formation and pound that thing. Hand it off, hand it off, throw in some QB draws and play action, hand it off.

And then there's red zone retardation. Alge Crumpler's great hands dying on him with an easy TD catch. Another poor call on first down from the two; remember Warrick Dunn?!! Don't try any gadget shit, just smash that thing in.

Basically, I'm having a really hard time understanding Atlanta's reluctance to run the ball. Good news is, they're only down by 17 at the half, and NO got a net 10 points on special teams plays. That shit is managable if the Falcons' offense cranks it up a notch. Won't be an easy comeback but that's what I'm predicting.

EDIT: Guess not. Don't know what Atlanta's deal was tonight, but they sucked it hardcore.

Straha · Post by **Straha** » 2006-09-26 12:50am

Not looking forward to next weekend.

Not. At. All.

Medic · Post by **Medic** » 2006-09-27 09:09am

Just saw this on Fox News, but they're saying Terrel Owens is hospitalized after an attempted suicide attempt.

Hope he recovers, shit.

theski · Post by **theski** » 2006-09-27 09:11am

SPC Brungardt wrote:Just saw this on Fox News, but they're saying Terrel Owens is hospitalized after an attempted suicide attempt.

Hope he recovers, shit.

ESPN update:

Source: T.O. hospitalized after reaction to medicine
DALLAS -- Terrell Owens was taken to the emergency room Tuesday night after suffering an adverse reaction to painkillers taken for treatment of his fractured hand, a source close to Owens told ESPN's Ed Werder.

"This is not serious," Owens' publicist Kim Etheridge said in Wednesday's online edition of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram.

A report earlier Tuesday stated that Owens would practice with the team Wednesday and possibly play Sunday at Tennessee, but his availability this week and beyond is now uncertain.

Doctors treating the Dallas Cowboys receiver were trying to induce vomiting when he arrived at Baylor Medical Center, according to a television report.

Owens was brought by a fire rescue crew to the hospital, Dallas-Fort Worth television station KTVT reported, citing sources the television station did not identify. A reporter for the station later said she saw Owens being wheeled down the hall.

Calls from The Associated Press to Owens' agent, his publicist and the Cowboys were not immediately returned Tuesday night. The hospital told the AP that they do not have a patient registered by Owens' name; however, federal privacy laws allow people to block their name from being released.

No teammates or Cowboys officials were seen entering the hospital late Tuesday night.

Owens fractured the fourth metacarpal bone in the Cowboys' victory over the Washington Redskins and underwent surgery on Sept. 18. The next day, a plate was screwed in, protecting the bone so it can heal without further damage.

Cowboys coach Bill Parcells mentioned in a press conference shortly thereafter that pain medication had made Owens ill, apparently making this the second time he has had an adverse reaction. The incident that sent him to the hospital Tuesday night apparently occurred sometime after Owens took medication after catching passes at the Cowboys' facility on Tuesday.

Medic · Post by **Medic** » 2006-09-27 09:13am

theski wrote:
SPC Brungardt wrote:Just saw this on Fox News, but they're saying Terrel Owens is hospitalized after an attempted suicide attempt.

Hope he recovers, shit.

ESPN update:
Source: T.O. hospitalized after reaction to medicine
DALLAS -- Terrell Owens was taken to the emergency room Tuesday night after suffering an adverse reaction to painkillers taken for treatment of his fractured hand, a source close to Owens told ESPN's Ed Werder.

"This is not serious," Owens' publicist Kim Etheridge said in Wednesday's online edition of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram.

A report earlier Tuesday stated that Owens would practice with the team Wednesday and possibly play Sunday at Tennessee, but his availability this week and beyond is now uncertain.

Doctors treating the Dallas Cowboys receiver were trying to induce vomiting when he arrived at Baylor Medical Center, according to a television report.

Owens was brought by a fire rescue crew to the hospital, Dallas-Fort Worth television station KTVT reported, citing sources the television station did not identify. A reporter for the station later said she saw Owens being wheeled down the hall.

Calls from The Associated Press to Owens' agent, his publicist and the Cowboys were not immediately returned Tuesday night. The hospital told the AP that they do not have a patient registered by Owens' name; however, federal privacy laws allow people to block their name from being released.

No teammates or Cowboys officials were seen entering the hospital late Tuesday night.

Owens fractured the fourth metacarpal bone in the Cowboys' victory over the Washington Redskins and underwent surgery on Sept. 18. The next day, a plate was screwed in, protecting the bone so it can heal without further damage.

Cowboys coach Bill Parcells mentioned in a press conference shortly thereafter that pain medication had made Owens ill, apparently making this the second time he has had an adverse reaction. The incident that sent him to the hospital Tuesday night apparently occurred sometime after Owens took medication after catching passes at the Cowboys' facility on Tuesday.

Gah, can they get even sports right? Sensationalist fuckers. This FNC guy said 'he admitted to police he was trying to harm himself.'

edit: seems CNN said the same thing, well, if I find a story throughout the day, I'll post an update, or whoever else is keeping a tab.

theski · Post by **theski** » 2006-09-27 10:03am

YEP././ Damm he did try

Report: Suicide Try
Terrell Owens reportedly attempted suicide Tuesday night and was rushed to a hospital, according to a Dallas police report

ESPN..

Medic · Post by **Medic** » 2006-09-27 10:14am

Police report: Owens hospitalized after suicide attemptESPN.com news services

Owens

DALLAS -- Flamboyant Dallas Cowboys receiver Terrell Owens attempted suicide by overdosing on pain medication, even putting two more pills into his mouth after fire rescue personnel arrived, The Associated Press reported Wednesday citing a police report.

Well, my original setiments stand out then. Seriously, wtf? What really does he have to be stressed out about?

Darth Garden Gnome · Post by **Darth Garden Gnome** » 2006-09-27 11:06am

What's the matter, Terrell? Not enough money?

Medic · Post by **Medic** » 2006-09-27 04:14pm

Darth Garden Gnome wrote:What's the matter, Terrell? Not enough money?

Between our own confusion on the facts here and now the fact that Owens says there was no suicide attempt, I'm comfortable saying that guy has WAY too much god damned drama in his life.

Darth Fanboy · Post by **Darth Fanboy** » 2006-09-27 05:48pm

On Dan Patrick's Radio Show, the reports are now indicating that T.O. had some sort of reaction, very likely a bad mix of supplements and the medication given to him after his surgery.

CarsonPalmer · Post by **CarsonPalmer** » 2006-09-27 07:33pm

My guess: Owens story and the initial story are both halfway there. I bet Owens was drinking, had a poor reaction to the painkillers, and wound up groggy. Where the other 35 pills went is anybody's guess.

Havok · Post by **Havok** » 2006-09-27 11:23pm

He says the pills are in a drawer. I don't think the guy drinks. And he said it was a bad mix of some vicodins and his suppliment diet. I can attest to the last one, 'cause that has happened to me one a few occasions. Actually... I've emptied out medicine bottles into drawers as well.

I saw this when I got to work and the first thing I said was "Bullshit."

Elfdart · Post by **Elfdart** » 2006-09-29 08:42pm

This weekend has some good games lined up. I think I know the real reason everyone in the media want Brett Favre to retire. They've found a new object of their fanwhore affections: The Manning Brothers. The wankers on Monday Night Football couldn't call a game between the Falcons and Saints, teams which have nothing whatsoever to do with Peyton or Eli Manning, without getting on their knees for another facial from the Mannings. Sorry Favre, but your cock will no longer receive the loving attention it's been getting fot the last decade. You're like the middle-aged housewife who gave the best years of her life to her husband, only to catch him fucking a college girl.

Anyway:

Cardinals > Falcons
Cowboys > Titans: Every player on the Dallas roster could pop 50 vicodins two hours before kickoff and they'll beat this shitty Titans team

Jets > Colts: This game has BOOBY TRAP written all over it
Vikings > Bills: I'm not picking the Bills again so long as (a) they go without a professional QB and (b) they play against a pro team

Panthers > Saints
Chargers > Ravens: The defenses are comparable, but the Chargers have more offense

Chiefs > 49ers: See my earlier post about the 49ers. Losing your two best players on the same play sucks out loud

Lions > Rams: Mike Martz was fired for winning but he gets some payback this Sunday

Browns > Raiders: Please, please, please don't let this be the game my local affiliate runs!

Jaguars > Redskins
Bengals > Patriots
Bears > Seahawks: I'd take the Bears even if Alexander was playing
Eagles > Packers: This one should be over in the 1st half, only this time the Eagles won't blow the lead

Darth Fanboy · Post by **Darth Fanboy** » 2006-09-29 09:06pm

Dan Patrick actually went out of his way on his Radio Show (day before the T.O. stuff) talking about how he was so proud of how ESPN handled the game. Someone needs to tell ESPN to quit sucking their own dicks because that game was terrible in terms of self praise. Any one of those jackass announcers saying that a concert featuring Green Day and U2 represented the heart and soul of New Orleans is utter garbage. The clips I saw from that show wouldn't pan out and away from the stage but if its anything like those other terrible concerts the NFL stages during its halftime shows then it was a bunch of plants making it look better while everyone else around the area either left or looked disinterested. I don't give a shit if Tony Kornheiser visited the damage and they put pictures of it up on TV. NEWSFLASH, you could have taken the money that was spent filming that bit and donated it towards hurricane relief or rebuilding efforts instead of a self congratulatory wankfest.

This year has been the absolute worst year for football announcers at both the college and professional level. Fortunately there have been some decent games to help mask it.

Predictions:

Falcons over Cardinals in what could be Kurt Warner's final start of his career unless he has a big game.

Cowboys crush Titans, if T.O. plays he gets at least one TD.

Colts over Jets.

Saints over Panthers.

Chargers squeak by Ravens, only because of the LT Factor, I don't know how losing Kiel will affect the bolts though.

Chiefs over Niners, Larry Johnson versus a terrible defense equals Fantasy Football related ejaculations in dens across America

Rams over Lions

Browns over Raiders, if you're picking at home, flip a coin. If heads, Cleveland, if tails Oakland. Flip the coin in the air and pray that it never lands.

JAguars beat the Deadskins.

Vikings over Bills.

Bengals own Patriots, hopefully knocking out some of Tom BRady's teeth in the process. I swear while watching and listening to ESPN's TV/Radio goons you would think the Pats had clinched the AFC East as opposed to getting their asses handed to them at home against Denver.

Bears demolish Seahawks in a preview of this year's NFC Title game.

Packers over Eagles in what should prove to the world that not only is Andy Reid overrated, but that they are not prepared to play great teams like Chicago, San Diego, etc.. etc..

EDIT:

added in Minnesota vs Buffalo

Havok · Post by **Havok** » 2006-09-30 01:32am

Missed last week from too much drinking, so here is this weeks winners.

Indianapolis at NY Jets Colts

New Orleans at Carolina Saints

Minnesota at Buffalo Bills

Arizona at Atlanta Falcons

San Diego at Baltimore Ravens

Miami at Houston Texans

San Francisco at Kansas City 49ers

Dallas at Tennessee Cowboys

Detroit at St. Louis Lions

Jacksonville at Washington Jaguars

Cleveland at Oakland Raiders

New England at Cincinnati Bengals

Seattle at Chicago Bears

Green Bay at Philadelphia Packers

Havok · Post by **Havok** » 2006-09-30 01:41am

Oh and by the way, I'm 22-7 so far on the season for games I actually picked. I missed week three and didn't pick before the first thursday night game I was 10-4

in my pics for week three but those don't count since I didn't post 'em here.

Medic · Post by **Medic** » 2006-10-01 04:08pm

Bloody murder.

Chalk another Loss for Marty-Never-Close-The-Game-Out-Schottenheimer.

Whenever we jump out to an early lead and don't score through out the middle quarters, I'm just gonna assume a loss from now on. Seems like between penalties, misques and just not getting at the other team enough to BURY them, yes BURY them, we lose every close game.

Feels like the 05-06 season all over again.