A Christmas Eve Challenge for all you WANKERS!!

MKSheppard · Post by **MKSheppard** » 2002-12-24 08:05pm

You are in Washington DC...in the back of your car, is none other than
Mike Wong, and it seems the entire US Government is after him, and it
is your mission to get him to the Canadian Embassy......

Anything goes.....

(and yes, this was one of my fucked up dreams last night...

)

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2002-12-24 08:12pm

He's not giving someone anal in the back seat of my car is he?

Cal Wright · Post by **Cal Wright** » 2002-12-24 08:14pm

First off, these are the pretenses that need to be amended. Yay or nay all you want. This will really make things interesting.

Your car is exactly what you drive. A V6 99 White Ford Taurus thank you very fucking much.

Your radio can either play radio stations it picks up, or you get a good song list of any song you like.

Cardigans My Favourte Game is going to open it up. Cuz when that front wheel drive unleashes it's awesome power on the bridgstone rubbers it's going to be hell to highwater.

Alright. So the drum line hits and smoke come rolling out from the front end. First off, we need to even the odds. Running a few red lights takes out a few cars. Then somehow my car has fucking grenades with a two second fuse. There goes a few more. The tricky part is the helicopters that are likely to be after us. I'm out of missiles though. I was bad about that in spy hunter. After detouring through some parking garages I manage to slip out from the radar. However local law enforcement has been called in. Luckily there are a billion white ford taurus' on the road. My Cb radio in conjunction with the police scanner alert me to road blocks. That and playing the role of Bandit with the truckers helps too. Well, we're making our way to the great white north. Then the worst news comes over my scanner. All entrances in and out of the maple leaf capital of the world are effectively blocked.

Well, it's been a few weeks and Wong is now learning that overalls and assholes are a common way of life in Sweet Home Alabama.

Tough luck Shep. I couldn't complete the mission. I'll have to settle for the alto ending.

Vertigo1 · Post by **Vertigo1** » 2002-12-24 09:01pm

I would stop by my place to pick up some extra clothes for him to wear (assuming that we wear anything close to the same size

) and drive with traffic normally, not doing anything to stand out in any way. My only problem would be getting past the border. Airports would certainly be secured as would many checkpoints to get into Canada. Maybe theres some hick road that they don't know about that I can use?

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2002-12-24 09:03pm

Not applicable. There is no Canadian Embassy since there is no Canada. After being conquered by the Ever-Victorious army(consisting of a truck and three rifles) it has become Greater Montana.

Post by **AdmiralKanos** » 2002-12-24 09:05pm

HemlockGrey wrote:Not applicable. There is no Canadian Embassy since there is no Canada. After being conquered by the Ever-Victorious army(consisting of a truck and three rifles) it has become Greater Montana.

Since it is a well-known fact that nobody in Montana has any idea that there's a world outside, the notion of military aggression from Montana is patently absurd.

Captain Cyran · Post by **Captain Cyran** » 2002-12-24 09:10pm

HemlockGrey wrote:Not applicable. There is no Canadian Embassy since there is no Canada. After being conquered by the Ever-Victorious army(consisting of a truck and three rifles) it has become Greater Montana.

What're you thinking, if anyone takes over Canada it is likely to be Buffalo thank you very much. And if anything, Canada will take over Buffalo and save it from it's own self-destruction.

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2002-12-24 09:12pm

Keep in mind that Montana did not lead the attack. I led the attack. Canada is Greater Montana simply out of convience.

Mr. Wong, we will expect your taxes by April...

Captain Cyran · Post by **Captain Cyran** » 2002-12-24 09:14pm

*Watches as enraged Buffalonians storm Greater Montana, join with the enraged Canadians and their combined forces beat back all the Montanians and Buffalo becomes a part of Canada*

Never underestimate Buffalo...

Post by **AdmiralKanos** » 2002-12-24 09:15pm

HemlockGrey wrote:Keep in mind that Montana did not lead the attack. I led the attack. Canada is Greater Montana simply out of convience.

You can have Quebec.

Mr. Wong, we will expect your taxes by April...

Would you like the same string of expletives that I use for the tax people I already deal with?

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2002-12-24 09:19pm

You can have Quebec.

The Republic de Quebec will be granted full independence. Poor suckers.

Would you like the same string of expletives that I use for the tax people I already deal with?

If you don't mind the IAO showing up on your door.

Post by **AdmiralKanos** » 2002-12-24 09:54pm

HemlockGrey wrote:
You can have Quebec.
The Republic de Quebec will be granted full independence. Poor suckers.

What? And deny them the chance to surrender?

Would you like the same string of expletives that I use for the tax people I already deal with?
If you don't mind the IAO showing up on your door.

Hey, I can joke about the IAO from a distance. You can only joke about them with the knowledge that they'll be building a dossier on you.

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2002-12-24 10:01pm

HemlockGrey wrote:Not applicable. There is no Canadian Embassy since there is no Canada. After being conquered by the Ever-Victorious army(consisting of a truck and three rifles) it has become Greater Montana.

Attempting to conqure nations we have 5000 times more ammunition then without me are you?

*Puts on sunglasses and watches night turn to day as an orbital partical beam system reduces Cyril's town to cinders*

jodathalas · Post by **jodathalas** » 2002-12-24 10:06pm

I would loan him my car, get out, and yell good luck as I run home for some sleep. Cause I don't want any more involvment with the government than necessary. Nothing against Wong. It's just, if I knew that people with M-16's and stuff were coming after the man next to me, I would really want to get away.

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2002-12-24 11:15pm

AdmiralKanos wrote:You can have Quebec.

Well, we do need a site in which to resume above gound nuclear bomb testing.

Come to think of it, we also need a place to send Rosie O'Donnell and Richard Simmons.