Good to have that one cleared up.Professor sucks the life out of vampire tales
Math formula takes bite out of Dracula
If vampires truly existed, the last human being would have been sucked dry centuries ago and our fanged killers would have long starved to death, according to an American physics professor who uses science to debunk the existence of supernatural creatures.
In a newly published essay, Central Florida University professor Costas Efthimiou uses science and mathematics to dismiss a variety of creatures of the night, including vampires, ghosts and zombies.
To examine the plausibility of Dracula existing, Mr. Efthimiou supposed the first vampire was created on Jan. 1, 1600.
That was roughly the time when the creature of darkness first emerged in folklore.
He then used the mathematical concept of exponential growth to calculate how long it would take for vampires to overrun the living.
Forget turning to crosses and holy water, it turns out we wouldn't have stood a chance.
Assuming that every vampire feeds once a month and that each victim becomes a vampire, the professor calculated that humanity's 15th-century population of roughly 536 million would have all been transformed into vampires within 30 months.
The vampires, of course, would have subsequently starved to death, he said.
"I only used mild, cautious assumptions," he said. "In the movies, you can see that vampires eat all the time. Truth be told, vampires never stop eating."
Mr. Efthimiou said Hollywood is guilty of perpetuating supernatural folklore and myths that are scientifically improbable.
"There are many reasons why people believe in pseudo-science. One of the main reasons is that people want to believe in a world that is different than ours. Our world is quite boring. People can't accept reality, so they wany to believe in things that physicists know are impossible."
Typically, Hollywood ghosts -- as well as those spirits allegedly seen in eyewitness accounts -- also don't play by the rules of physics. The headless ghost of Anne Boleyn is said to wander the halls of Blickling Hall in England, but she's clearly never met Sir Isaac Newton.
According to Newton's laws of motion, ghosts shouldn't be able to walk like human beings as well as pass through walls. In order to walk around like Patrick Swayze in Ghost, an entity needs to exert force on the floor which exerts an equal and opposite force in return. However, that same force wouldn't allow a spirit to pass through walls.
"I show that the standard picture of ghosts is inconsistent," he said. "Ghosts can't have the ability to go through material objects like walls, yet walk around like us because they should also be falling straight through the floor.
"If they can go through walls, they're going to go through floors. If there are such as thing as ghosts, they'd be different than (what) people commonly imagine."
While Mr. Efthimiou enjoys poking holes in the supernatural, humanity better pray that Count Dracula isn't awakened this Halloween. Although the population of world is now 6.5 billion, the professor said it would only take 34 months for vampires to devour and overrun modern man.
"There are more of us, but it would still be a quick end."
-- Asuka
I had thought he was just slowly sucking her dry. Been too long since I read the book.
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