Anti-atheist site. wow, just.. wow.

Darwin · Post by **Darwin** » 2006-11-16 03:36pm

Talk about flawed! I can't get through 5 enties withoout my brain shutting down in self-defense. WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME??

http://www.tektonics.org/parody/fundyath.html

TithonusSyndrome · Post by **TithonusSyndrome** » 2006-11-16 03:53pm

No kidding. A lot of those arguments aren't close to anything someone should be ashamed of, but I guess the author subscribes to the notion that if you recite your opponent's position with a sufficiently condescending tone, it magically makes their arguments laughable.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2006-11-16 03:54pm

This reminds me of my "Argue the opposite side's position" thread in N&P. One thing I've noticed about fundies and right-wingers (not coincidentally, since they are often the same people) is that they have an absolutely absurd, hopelessly caricatured view of the other side's position. You can tell they haven't spent so much as 60 seconds in their entire lives trying to understand the opposing viewpoint.

It's annoying. I've slogged through the entire Bible: something most Christians have never bothered doing. I own a copy of a Jehovah's Witness book attacking evolution and I read that too. Yet I routinely run into fundies who haven't even mustered the effort to so much as read a single treatise on atheism that didn't come from their own side of the aisle, and they always claim that they've actually "studied" the issue.

Just try listening to a fundie sometime; he honestly thinks atheists are just people who are rebelling against God so they can be hedonists. It honestly doesn't occur to him that maybe the atheist has simply concluded that the whole idea of God is nonsensical. And then try listening to a right-winger; these people honestly believe that everyone on the left wants to put up child molesters in luxury condos and give Osama Bin Laden a great big hug while pissing on the graves on 9/11 victims and having abortions for fun.

Darth Servo · Post by **Darth Servo** » 2006-11-16 04:20pm

What the hell.

idiot anti-atheist site wrote:
[1] You became an atheist when you were 10 years old, based on ideas of God that you learned in Sunday School. Your ideas about God haven't changed since.

Nice how they ignore whether the idea is stupid or not and just rant about how if you got it at a young age, it must be wrong. Never mind that fundamentalist Christianity teaches people to accept everything they say blindly like a little child would.

You think that the primary aim of an omnibenevolent God is for people to have FUN.

No, the primary aim of an omnibenevolent God should be to prevent human suffering.

You believe that extra drippy ice-cream is a logical proof against the existence of God, because an omniscient God would know how to stop the ice-cream from being extra drippy, an omnipotent God would have the ability to stop the ice-cream from being extra drippy, and by golly, an omnibenevolent God wouldn't want your ice-cream to be extra drippy.

Such stupidity deserves no comment.

Although you've memorized a half a dozen proofs that He doesn't exist, you still think you're God's gift to the ignorant masses.

Another case of psychological projection since Fundie Christians think memorizing have a dozen bible verses makes them "God's gife to the ignorant masses" :rollseyes:

You believe the astronomical size of the universe somehow disproves God, as if God needed a tiny universe in order to exist.

Out-right lie. The astronomical size of the universe is one of the pieces of evidence we have for knowing that Genesis is a joke. It has nothing to do with whether or not God exists.

You think questions like, "Can God create a rock so big that He cannot lift it?" and, "Can God will Himself out of existence?" are perfect examples of how to disprove God's omnipotence and ultimately how to disprove God. When someone proves to you the false logic behind the questions (i.e. pitting God's omnipotence against itself), you desperately try to defend the questions, but then give up and go to a different Christian site to ask them.

More psychological projection and ignoring the fact that omnipotence is essentially self contradictory. Also the fundie christian uses a very peculiar definition of "proof" as it seems to them to mean, "someone didn't buy or understand the argument"

Related to the above, you spend a great deal of your spare time writing to Christian websites asking them these very questions.

Meanwhile idiot fundie Christians spend even MORE time trying to destroy science.

You declare on a public forum that you are "furious at God for not existing."

Funny how I've never seen that happen once. Meanwhile Fundies get up every Sunday proclaiming how they are furious at Atheists for not accepting their message and then go on to blame the Atheists for everything that is wrong with society.

You spend hours arguing that a-theism actually means "without a belief in God " and not just " belief that there is no god" as if this is a meaningful distinction in real life.

Again, name one time this happened, as opposed to the countless times Christian fundies have tried to say Atheism is a religion.

You consistently deny the existence of God because you personally have never seen him but you reject out of hand personal testimony from theists who claim to have experienced God as a reality in their lives.

Because said "testimony" is NOT directly seeing the guy. Its a "feeling" that is completely subjective and hardly unique to Christians and in no way supports God's existance. The only reason these people say "Its God" is because they've been brainwashed their entire lives to believe that.

You can make the existence of pink unicorns the center-piece of a philosophical critique.

And why not? There is just as much evidence for them as there is for triune absurdity most fundies worship.

You insist that "the burden of proof is on he that alleges/accuses", and "it's impossible to prove a negative", then state "That's what Christians do. They lie. Their most common lie is that they were once atheists." When reminded about the burden of proof bit, you reply with, "Well, prove Christians don't lie!"

More psychological projection of what Fundie Christians do to everyone else. I'm starting to wonder if this is actually a parody site of the Fundamentalist Morons.

You adamantly believe that the "God of the gaps" idea is an essential tenet of orthodox Christian faith espoused by all the great Christian thinkers throughout history.

Um, no, that would be the Christian apologists who say that.

When you were a child, someone came down with a deadly disease and prayed and prayed for God to take it away. God did not remove the disease and your friend died. You ask other Christians why they had to die when they were such a nice person and never harmed anyone. Dissatisfied with their answers, you suddenly decide that there is no God and that all Christians are nothing but lying, conniving con artists and hypocrites....all that is except for your friend who died.

Hey, if your diety can't be consistent with keeping his promises, why should anyone worship him?

You call a view held by less than ten percent of the American public "common sense".

Appeal to popularity fallacy.

You're a spoiled fifteen year old boy who lives in the suburbs and you go into a chat room to declare that, "I know there is no God because no loving God would allow anyone to suffer as much as I...hold on. My cell phone's ringing."

Love the way they think Atheists must really just be ignorant teenagers trying to show off.

You attack your fellow atheists, who hold the "belief that there is no god", calling them "liars," and state that, "I do not deny the existence of any god. I just don't believe in any." Then you tell someone that their God is "made up." When someone calls you on this, you state, "I never made such a claim."

More psychological projection.

Going with the definition of "without a belief in God", you insist that all people are born atheists, and that dogs, cats, rocks, and trees are as well. You make statements like, "My dog is an atheist. Ask him about his lack of belief."

Given the FACT that everyone begins life with essentially a blank slate and need to be TAUGHT to believe in God, this is hardly a condemnation.

Furthermore, I have yet to see any dog or other animal besides humans profess their belief in God or go door-to-door preaching about him or killing other members of their species for not believing in him.

You believe that if something cannot be touched, seen, heard, or measured in some way, then it must not exist, yet you fail to see the irony of your calling Christians "narrow-minded".

Never mind that this is precisely how we determine if something does or does not exist.

You say that there is no God and that those who believe in God do so in blind faith, yet your claim that there is no God also rests on blind faith.

Lie. An Atheists statement that there is no God rests on utter LACK OF EVIDENCE.

While you don't believe in God, you feel justified on bashing God or attacking those who believe in something that you KNOW doesn't exist, fighting against or even discussing about a non-existent being are the symptoms of mental illness!

How terrible that some Atheists don't turn the other cheek after a lifetime of Christians treating them in exactly the same manner.

You complain when Christians appeal to their emotions when justifying their belief in God yet you feel justified on appealing to your emotions for lack of belief in God.

Another lie. Appealing to utter lack of evidence is not appealing to emotions, not that a moron like this would know the difference.

You blame God for the starvation, sickness, pain and suffering in the world...when, indeed, it is MAN's greed, politics, selfishness and apathy that not only causes, but also ignores the sick and the starving masses. We aren't our brothers' keepers....but we should be.

Never mind that its RELIGION that keeps telling people to keep poping out babies like we were going to be extinct tomorrow otherwise that leads to there being not enough food to go around. Never mind that it is supposedly GOD that caused the droughts that lead to famine in many parts of the world. This is just another example of the religious fundie's scapegoat mentality and propensity to oversimplify the situation. Yes, greed does lead to some not having enough to eat, etc but that is hardly the ONLY factor in the equation.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2006-11-16 04:26pm

What were you expecting from tektonics.org, out of interest? Also it's a "parody" section of Turkel's site (he's felt compelled to hide behind the pseudonym "J.P. Holding" for years because he was a prison librarian) so his lame anti-atheist insults are obviously not intended to promote arguments, just wind people up.

Faram · Post by **Faram** » 2006-11-16 04:39pm

Well I am a fuddy Atheist, a quick scroll resulted in this stuff that fis me.

Dumbass site wrote:You can quote from the bible better than most missionaries...at least the parts where someone dies.

You think that "Lord of the Rings" and "Harry Potter" are more believable than the Bible.

You call God "she" in the presence of Christians simply out of sheer spite.

You just can't see any difference between Pat Robertson Jerry Falwell, James Dobson and Osama bin Laden.

Quite fun, I will read all of those at a later date.

Davis 51 · Post by **Davis 51** » 2006-11-16 07:21pm

Last of all -- you write this website a letter which includes a rebuttal to the above listing!

Words fail me.

Shrykull · Post by **Shrykull** » 2006-11-17 12:33am

Darth Wong wrote:This reminds me of my "Argue the opposite side's position" thread in N&P. One thing I've noticed about fundies and right-wingers (not coincidentally, since they are often the same people) is that they have an absolutely absurd, hopelessly caricatured view of the other side's position. You can tell they haven't spent so much as 60 seconds in their entire lives trying to understand the opposing viewpoint.

It's annoying. I've slogged through the entire Bible: something most Christians have never bothered doing. I own a copy of a Jehovah's Witness book attacking evolution and I read that too. Yet I routinely run into fundies who haven't even mustered the effort to so much as read a single treatise on atheism that didn't come from their own side of the aisle, and they always claim that they've actually "studied" the issue.

Just try listening to a fundie sometime; he honestly thinks atheists are just people who are rebelling against God so they can be hedonists. It honestly doesn't occur to him that maybe the atheist has simply concluded that the whole idea of God is nonsensical. And then try listening to a right-winger; these people honestly believe that everyone on the left wants to put up child molesters in luxury condos and give Osama Bin Laden a great big hug while pissing on the graves on 9/11 victims and having abortions for fun.

I remember bringing up that, that an atheist wouldn't crash planes into a building for a religion, they said the columbine kids were atheists, and that why they did what they did.

Patrick Degan · Post by **Patrick Degan** » 2006-11-17 12:46am

You just can't see any difference between Pat Robertson Jerry Falwell, James Dobson and Osama bin Laden.

Four religiously hateful loons who don't give a fuck about human life beyond an abstraction and all insisting the Invisible Cloud-Being is on their side. Hmm... No, I can't see the difference between them, actually.

FSTargetDrone · Post by **FSTargetDrone** » 2006-11-17 12:49am

Darth Wong wrote:It's annoying. I've slogged through the entire Bible: something most Christians have never bothered doing. I own a copy of a Jehovah's Witness book attacking evolution and I read that too. Yet I routinely run into fundies who haven't even mustered the effort to so much as read a single treatise on atheism that didn't come from their own side of the aisle, and they always claim that they've actually "studied" the issue.

No surprise at all. It brings to mind the Colbert interview with that clown Lynn Westmoreland who wanted the Ten Commandments everywhere, but could't name them when asked.

Gil Hamilton · Post by **Gil Hamilton** » 2006-11-17 12:49am

Most of it was drivel but some of it is comedy gold:

You claim that evolution and the big bang are two entirely separate theories that explain different aspects of the universe, yet, in what school of learning can you find any real separation or distinction between the two?

I have a better question. What school of thought is unable to tell the difference between cosmology and biology?

You feel that Marilyn Manson is really, really profound.

*snort* BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

That made my day.

OmegaGuy · Post by **OmegaGuy** » 2006-11-17 02:07pm

A while ago someone spammed this on the FSTDT comments. It was quickly rebutted.

Post by **K. A. Pital** » 2006-11-17 02:36pm

What school of thought is unable to tell the difference between cosmology and biology?

Catholic Church. It would ban both if it could (and actually it lovingly banned physics alltogether in the Dark Age).

Elmca · Post by **Elmca** » 2006-11-17 05:52pm

Stas Bush wrote:
What school of thought is unable to tell the difference between cosmology and biology?
Catholic Church. It would ban both if it could (and actually it lovingly banned physics alltogether in the Dark Age).

I'm not sure if this has changed recently (or if it's different in Russian Orthodox churches), but a few years ago I was teaching sixth grade Sunday School classes at my Roman Catholic church. Our textbooks were given to us by the church and were the same books used in most of Virginia.

The books were quite clear that the Bible was NOT to be taken literally and that both the Big Bang and evolution are acceptable to the church. The only thing that was added was that God was responsible for the "soul" being added to the first "true" human, whenever it was that he/she evolved.

I've since broken ties with the church over other matters, but I don't think their teaching has changed that much since Pope Bennie took over.

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2006-11-17 06:19pm

Elmca is correct. Stas Bush is gleefully ranting about a red herring.

Stark · Post by **Stark** » 2006-11-17 06:23pm

Er, Stas said they banned a branch of science in THE DARK AGES. I don't think Elmca's sixth grade Sunday School class is in the dark ages, somehow. Sure they're open about fiction NOW, but to say that means they were also in the dark ages is crazy.

Elmca · Post by **Elmca** » 2006-11-17 06:59pm

Sorry, I wasn't clear.

I was commenting on Stas's comment that they would ban cosmology and biology, rather than the part about physics in the Dark Ages. That part is, in fact, a fact.

Superman · Post by **Superman** » 2006-11-17 07:06pm

It's like I've said all along; the fundies are now in a dark age. They're in the same place the Catholic Church was during the Dark Ages.

Anyway, I think they're jealous because it really just comes down to the fact that they're stupider than the atheists, and they know it.

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2006-11-17 07:53pm

Stark wrote:Er, Stas said they banned a branch of science in THE DARK AGES. I don't think Elmca's sixth grade Sunday School class is in the dark ages, somehow. Sure they're open about fiction NOW, but to say that means they were also in the dark ages is crazy.

Correct. But it's a red herring.

Dooey Jo · Post by **Dooey Jo** » 2006-11-18 08:37am

Wow, some of that's pretty damn hilarious.

21. While you don't believe in God, you feel justified on bashing God or attacking those who believe in something that you KNOW doesn't exist, fighting against or even discussing about a non-existent being are the symptoms of mental illness!

Wow, it's amazing they don't realise what they're saying here. "Even discussing about a non-existent being are the symptoms of mental illness" and atheist are attacking the beliefs of the people who do so, not the actual being... So in short, they just declared themselves mentally ill... Well, can't argue with that

25. You claim that evolution and the big bang are two entirely separate theories that explain different aspects of the universe, yet, in what school of learning can you find any real separation or distinction between the two?

Yes, in what school indeed. That's why we were always taught about natural selection in the astronomy classes...

30. You descended from apes.(Think about it.)

Damn dirty apes! Mud-creation theory FTW (or rib-creation theory if you are female)!! Think about that!

52. You ignore "Time Magazine's" poll, which states that only 28% of Americans believe in evolution. But of course, "Time Magazine" must been run by creationists.

No, but America is

137. You think that the words "Christian" and "sane" are mutually exclusive.

See argument #21...

152. You're saving up to move to some more enlightened place, like Sweden.

You mind telling me what's wrong with Sweden? You're just jealous of all our hot awesome blonde Swedish chicks

165. You believe that nativity scenes should be banned from public view, but that anyone objecting to pornography only has to look the other way.

Well it's true, pornography do tend to be really public...

218. You think that "Lord of the Rings" and "Harry Potter" are more believable than the Bible.

They teach better moral lessons, too.

275. You have turned into a Jew and say "G-d" for the sole reason of not saying "God".

Say what? Are all Jews no also atheists?

280. You get apoplectic about being called a Fundy Atheist for believing all those self-evidently true propositions above. And you label all theists as "fundies".

Those with "(think about it)", they are especially self-evident.

Also, somewhy, I get the impression that they have only debated strange scarecrow-like versions of atheists...

Master of Cards · Post by **Master of Cards** » 2006-11-18 03:20pm

Elmca wrote:
Stas Bush wrote:
What school of thought is unable to tell the difference between cosmology and biology?
Catholic Church. It would ban both if it could (and actually it lovingly banned physics alltogether in the Dark Age).
I'm not sure if this has changed recently (or if it's different in Russian Orthodox churches), but a few years ago I was teaching sixth grade Sunday School classes at my Roman Catholic church. Our textbooks were given to us by the church and were the same books used in most of Virginia.

The books were quite clear that the Bible was NOT to be taken literally and that both the Big Bang and evolution are acceptable to the church. The only thing that was added was that God was responsible for the "soul" being added to the first "true" human, whenever it was that he/she evolved.

I've since broken ties with the church over other matters, but I don't think their teaching has changed that much since Pope Bennie took over.

Same here and my aarchbishop is a rabid conetive

Isana Kadeb · Post by **Isana Kadeb** » 2006-11-18 10:17pm

Low grade, sophistic, rhetorical crap. Thanks for playing, try again.

Vehrec · Post by **Vehrec** » 2006-11-18 11:37pm

Most of this is pure WTF material It's got nothing going for it, except to be posted on a dart board and punctured.
Quoted for extra laughs and sighs:

You think that God would have made things a lot clearer for everyone, ranging from the medieval knight to the Chinese peasant, had He inspired His Word in modern English in words and concepts you could understand. You also ask, when told of the scarceness of paper in the ancient world, why God didn't provide enough paper to write a longer story.

You uphold a woman’s right to choose, unless a woman chooses adoption, chooses to be a stay-at-home mom, chooses to homeschool, or chooses to start a business.

You refer to Christian leaders as "fuehrer".

You're convinced, despite evidence to the contrary, that Christianity was responsible for the Jewish holocaust because, dang it, that just SEEMS like something Christians would do.

You refuse to use the word "excruciating" because of its origins in describing the agonies of crucifixion. (ex crucis - "from the cross")

Frank Hipper · Post by **Frank Hipper** » 2006-11-19 12:55am

You like to list contradictions to Christians like if you some how pretend that Christians are not aware of them or that they are igorant about their own religion.

And this isn't a problem for Literal Interpretation because...?

You're stupid enough to think atheists are treated like second-class citizens. Yet of course, you spend most of your day belittling Christians and other religious people.

Yes, internet anonymity is the only guaranteed safe way to do so, idiot.

You go to a church wedding or funeral, but only to pray ostentatiously to "the woman upstairs".

Do you honestly think this is the behavior of an atheist?

You think Secular Humanism actually promotes religious tolerance. Secular Humanism only tolerates religion; it doesn't accept it.

Everyone here knows I'm gay, and I'm sure everyone here can figure how much profound irony I find in this statement.