Horrible crossover fan-fics

[Sean Mulligan]

"Groan" oh the memories of hunting through FF.net for interesting stuff, the horror, the horror!.

I learned what slash meant then (While still 11) and what Zerg slash was among other things. Still I haven't read any fan fics barring 2 good ones I found back in the day and fics here on sd.net (Though not all) and fics recommended by people here.

And this thread reminds again why I need to find reviewers, since out of my 9 written tales so far, 8 are crossovers. (Though I have managed to find someone in RL to read one of them, but its someone I know and she'll be primarily helping me with grammar).
Please, tell me if I end up writing such horrors, I won't know alone, K

I just methodically go through each category that I am familiar with in alphabetical order and look at all the new stories and updates to see what is interesting. When I am done, I start all over again. I have been doing this on FFN for about seven years.

[Pick]

I remember the old days. AKA, early middle school. "Oh, the fourth Harry Potter book is going to take forever to come out! I've heard, though, that you can read stories about the SAME characters by DIFFERENT authors online! How cool!"

I was a dumb kid sometimes.

[The Grim Squeaker]

I learned what slash meant then (While still 11) and what Zerg slash was among other things.

?!?!?!

Zerg slash? People write fan fics about the Zerg having sex?! With what I'm assuming are human or Protoss characters?!?!

Yes, and the assumption that Protoss don't have dicks, so the Zerg Make them (Guess what the claws are for).

I just methodically go through each category that I am familiar with in alphabetical order and look at all the new stories and updates to see what is interesting. When I am done, I start all over again. I have been doing this on FFN for about seven years.

Cool, whats your FF name? I'll go through your favourite stories list, you sound like the ideal test filtering workhorse for those not willing to suffer

[Sean Mulligan]

I learned what slash meant then (While still 11) and what Zerg slash was among other things.

?!?!?!

Zerg slash? People write fan fics about the Zerg having sex?! With what I'm assuming are human or Protoss characters?!?!

Yes, and the assumption that Protoss don't have dicks, so the Zerg Make them (Guess what the claws are for).

I just methodically go through each category that I am familiar with in alphabetical order and look at all the new stories and updates to see what is interesting. When I am done, I start all over again. I have been doing this on FFN for about seven years.

Cool, whats your FF name? I'll go through your favourite stories list, you sound like the ideal test filtering workhorse for those not willing to suffer

It is just Sean Mulligan and I never made my own favorites list. Just look at C2's in different categories and find authors that you like and look at their favorites lists.

[Glocksman]

You're blankly staring into a horrid pit of vipers featuring 7 of 9 going dominatrix on Yoda.

Interesting idea.
Anyone want to take it up for the unnamed porno fanfic?

[General Soontir Fel]

I once read a Harry Potter/James Bond crossover, where Harry was Bond's... apprentice. Yes, it was slash.

[Ryushikaze]

Uh... Pokemon/ Legend of Zelda/ Macross/ Uresai Yatsura... No logic, just sort of dumped stuff in when he felt like it.

James Bond/ Sailor Moon (Bond kills senshi. Reads like a badly written transcript of a Goldeneye level, with less driving force)

Ranma/ Evangelion that managed to destroy the general continuity of both series in its first few moments (Ranma is Asuka's elder brother, Ranma goes to south pole instead of Jusenkyo, etc.)

Ranma/ Slayers. Lacked an active verb. Incredibly dull.

Gundam Wing/ Final Fantasy Seven Advent Children. Not badly written, but written with the idea of mutual existence, raising far too many questions about the backstory of both works.

The later works in the Artemis's Lover series manage to top it quite sufficiently...

Oh, there's a lot. This is only the list of the bad ones I've personally MSTed. There are tons of tons more.

[phongn]

James Bond/ Sailor Moon (Bond kills senshi. Reads like a badly written transcript of a Goldeneye level, with less driving force)

Those types of fics are usually just to kill a series the author finds annoying ... but does that make Pluto the bond girl?

Ranma/ Evangelion that managed to destroy the general continuity of both series in its first few moments (Ranma is Asuka's elder brother, Ranma goes to south pole instead of Jusenkyo, etc.)

That's ... pretty bad, though elseworld crossovers and fusions can be done well.

Ranma/ Slayers. Lacked an active verb. Incredibly dull.

Technical writer, eh?

The later works in the Artemis's Lover series manage to top it quite sufficiently...

Meh. There's worse on the 'net.

[RedImperator]

Ranma/ Slayers. Lacked an active verb. Incredibly dull.

Someone managed to write an entire fanfic in the passive voice? That's almost impressive as a technical accomplishment.

[ElPintoGrande]

Not that I have room to pick at stories (as I've never put one up for view) but 'Stargates and Battlestars' comes to mind if for no other reason than it has no coherent plot and almost ignores all aspects of the two uni's outside of character names, etc.

[Master of Cards]

Ranma/ Slayers. Lacked an active verb. Incredibly dull.

Someone managed to write an entire fanfic in the passive voice? That's almost impressive as a technical accomplishment.

No passive voice is writing entire sentences with pretire verbs and a to be verb.

[RedImperator]

Ranma/ Slayers. Lacked an active verb. Incredibly dull.

Someone managed to write an entire fanfic in the passive voice? That's almost impressive as a technical accomplishment.

No passive voice is writing entire sentences with pretire verbs and a to be verb.

Believe it or not, I know what the passive voice is. If the fanfic Ryushikaze described lacked any active verbs, then by default, all the verbs must have been passive, and by definition, the entire story was written in passive voice.

[Master of Cards]

Someone managed to write an entire fanfic in the passive voice? That's almost impressive as a technical accomplishment.

No passive voice is writing entire sentences with pretire verbs and a to be verb.

Believe it or not, I know what the passive voice is. If the fanfic Ryushikaze described lacked any active verbs, then by default, all the verbs must have been passive, and by definition, the entire story was written in passive voice.

You can have active verbs in passive voice
EDIT
found some good Defs http://owl.english.purdue.edu/handouts/ ... tpass.html or is conducted not active?

[Ryushikaze]

Someone managed to write an entire fanfic in the passive voice? That's almost impressive as a technical accomplishment.

No passive voice is writing entire sentences with pretire verbs and a to be verb.

Believe it or not, I know what the passive voice is. If the fanfic Ryushikaze described lacked any active verbs, then by default, all the verbs must have been passive, and by definition, the entire story was written in passive voice.

Oh, and it was. Well, at least anything that should have been renderred actively was passive.

Oh, and I forgot to mention the Ranma 1/2 / Star Trek Amalgam that wound up not really being either.

[Master of Cards]

No passive voice is writing entire sentences with pretire verbs and a to be verb.

Believe it or not, I know what the passive voice is. If the fanfic Ryushikaze described lacked any active verbs, then by default, all the verbs must have been passive, and by definition, the entire story was written in passive voice.

Oh, and it was. Well, at least anything that should have been renderred actively was passive.

Oh, and I forgot to mention the Ranma 1/2 / Star Trek Amalgam that wound up not really being either.

I'm not debating it's in passive, I'm saying there were active verbs

[Ryushikaze]

Believe it or not, I know what the passive voice is. If the fanfic Ryushikaze described lacked any active verbs, then by default, all the verbs must have been passive, and by definition, the entire story was written in passive voice.

Oh, and it was. Well, at least anything that should have been renderred actively was passive.

Oh, and I forgot to mention the Ranma 1/2 / Star Trek Amalgam that wound up not really being either.

I'm not debating it's in passive, I'm saying there were active verbs

And I admit that my initial description was hyperbole. Having looked over it, though, it still way overuses passive voice and is INCREDIBLY dull.

[Eris]

I'm not debating it's in passive, I'm saying there were active verbs

So this is just a pointless waste of time nitpick then? Congratulations, you lose.

On topic, is there such thing as a good crossover? Admitedly, we have a few which aren't really bad, but rarely are they even close to what could be done if the fiction in question stayed in one continuity. Tucking in all the ragged edges and universe idiosyncracies puts anything that's attempted two steps behind right off the bat. Except for Sandman. Everything can cross with Sandman.

And just to throw another bad one out there: 9 Ball Dreams. It has Sailor Mercury/Tom Cruise sex. Fear.

[phongn]

On topic, is there such thing as a good crossover? Admitedly, we have a few which aren't really bad, but rarely are they even close to what could be done if the fiction in question stayed in one continuity. Tucking in all the ragged edges and universe idiosyncracies puts anything that's attempted two steps behind right off the bat. Except for Sandman. Everything can cross with Sandman.

I've read quite a few good crossovers.

[Singular Quartet]

On topic, is there such thing as a good crossover? Admitedly, we have a few which aren't really bad, but rarely are they even close to what could be done if the fiction in question stayed in one continuity. Tucking in all the ragged edges and universe idiosyncracies puts anything that's attempted two steps behind right off the bat.

"Children of an Elder God" Lovecraft/Evangelion merger. It's better than both sources universes.

Except for Sandman. Everything can cross with Sandman.

And Stargate. Everything can be crossed with Stargate.

[NecronLord]

Anyway, the worst one I've seen was that Prisoner/Dr Who crossover one from some guy that was briefly on the forum. It was posted on his site, he had no concept of making it readable and he went out of his way to be verbose rather than accessible or even descriptive.

It's a horrible combination when you have a fanfic with really just nonsensical conversations and situations described in the worst attempt at florid crap ever devised. Necronlord I remember seemed to really hate the guy. Ahhhh, internets.

That fucker spoiled The Prisoner for me. I can't watch it now without thinking 'a wave of the sonic screwdriver would sort that out' - this might be because I'm watching it in a film club type affair that's showing Doctor Who right before, but still...

If you think I hated the little runt, you should've seen AV.

On topic, is there such thing as a good crossover? Admitedly, we have a few which aren't really bad, but rarely are they even close to what could be done if the fiction in question stayed in one continuity. Tucking in all the ragged edges and universe idiosyncracies puts anything that's attempted two steps behind right off the bat.

I like to think my last one was good; fanfics are pretty good for playing for humour. In that example, 'a Stargate-Star Trek crossover, where Star Trek the show still exists in-character.'

And Stargate. Everything can be crossed with Stargate.

I still have the urge to do a stargate-stargate crossover with the book series and the TV series. But I'll have to get the rest of the books some day.

[RedImperator]

On topic, is there such thing as a good crossover? Admitedly, we have a few which aren't really bad, but rarely are they even close to what could be done if the fiction in question stayed in one continuity. Tucking in all the ragged edges and universe idiosyncracies puts anything that's attempted two steps behind right off the bat.

I don't think that's an insurmountable obstacle, but it can scuttle anything which attempts to cross incompatible universes right off the bat. Not that I'd really know for sure, seeing as I've never bothered to try.

[CaptainChewbacca]

As long as the author is intelligent, even the unlikely pairings can work. Someone on this very BBS did an excellent SG1/Zelda crossover.

[RedImperator]

As long as the author is intelligent, even the unlikely pairings can work. Someone on this very BBS did an excellent SG1/Zelda crossover.

SG1, though, is the exception, because there you get an automatic Magic Widget with which you can wave away all your problems regarding setting.

[CaptainChewbacca]

As long as the author is intelligent, even the unlikely pairings can work. Someone on this very BBS did an excellent SG1/Zelda crossover.

SG1, though, is the exception, because there you get an automatic Magic Widget with which you can wave away all your problems regarding setting.

Setting, yes, but if someone is a shit author their SG1 crossover will STILL suck.

[RedImperator]

As long as the author is intelligent, even the unlikely pairings can work. Someone on this very BBS did an excellent SG1/Zelda crossover.

SG1, though, is the exception, because there you get an automatic Magic Widget with which you can wave away all your problems regarding setting.

Setting, yes, but if someone is a shit author their SG1 crossover will STILL suck.

Well hell, if the guy's a shit author it doesn't matter if the setting is actually capable of causing the reader to physically orgasm. The story is still going to suck no matter what if the author is incompetent.