Ever get caught jerking off?

Enforcer Talen · Post by **Enforcer Talen** » 2002-12-29 08:56pm

Kamakazie Sith wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:The thread title says it all. Has anyone ever been caught? I haven't, but I've always wondered if those "American pie" embarrassment scenarios have ever happened to anyone in real life.
Oh yeah, we were waiting for our house to get built so we were living with my grandparents. My grandparents don't believe in locks on bedrooms doors, so anyway one night my mom walked in and said "What the hell are you doing?" I said "Nothing!" and quickly left the area.

The next day my dad gave me the talk......very embarassing.

I've also been caught by my girlfriend, but that has many benefits.

never been given the talk. had to learn all my stuff off the net. -smirks-

Darth Yoshi · Post by **Darth Yoshi** » 2002-12-29 09:40pm

Eleas wrote:
ArmorPierce wrote:looking at internet porn and you're underage. Tsk tsk
Another thing I can never understand. Why the age limit? Who gets hurt?

Not sure. Something to do fundies, though.

Skelron · Post by **Skelron** » 2002-12-29 10:06pm

Hmm well the only time I've caught I wasn't actually doing anything, but people assumed I was...

I was watching a bad late night program at my Halls of Residence back in my first year, the program took old movies/TV shows and added thought bubbles to take the piss. It was a typical I'm drunk so this is really funny program. I was downstairs in the common room at the time, as I wasn't using my own TV, (Basically I wasn't paying the TV licence on my own. (Eacxh room in a Halls has to have it's own TV licence))and the one we put in the kitchen was being used by my Flat mates.

So anyway the program also loved to take the piss of old Black and white Pornos, and I had the flu, Some Girls from the Flatt opposite ours where passing and saw me take a Tissue out of my pocket, and saw the 'Porno' on the TV and decided I was maturbating. I wasn't but anything I said they didn't believe and that story haunted me for the rest of the year. (As evidence that I wasn't, I should have pointed out that it was a Really Crap Porno... hence why they where ripping it to shreds... Hindsight is great)

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2002-12-29 10:08pm

I've never fully understood the purpose of tissues in relation to this activity.

Post by **Kuja** » 2002-12-29 10:10pm

HemlockGrey wrote:I've never fully understood the purpose of tissues in relation to this activity.

Makes cleanup much less complicated.

ArmorPierce · Post by **ArmorPierce** » 2002-12-29 10:16pm

Eleas wrote:
ArmorPierce wrote:looking at internet porn and you're underage. Tsk tsk
Another thing I can never understand. Why the age limit? Who gets hurt?

watch the south park episode and you'll know. Also for the young and inexperience it may distract them from school work, but I also think that the age limit is to high, 21 in some states

O_O

and even 18 is a bit high, maybe 15 or 16 would be a better age.

Vertigo1 · Post by **Vertigo1** » 2002-12-30 12:40am

Well, I got caught by my mother one time when I was 13. I hadn't learned how to get off using my hands so I did something else. I laid ontop of a pillow and "humped" it. I was getting in a good rythum and was moaning a little when I was JUST before blowing my load when my mother turns the hall light on, walks in and asks if I was OK. I was only wearing a t-shirt and my underwear was on the end of the bed in plain view. I quickly rolled over and put the pillow over my crotch. (My mother is one of the biggest prudes there are, so I did that to keep her from bitching at me for being half-naked.) I told her I was fine, but she kept asking me over and over again "to be sure".

And of course, she gets pissed off when I show the slightest sign of irritation of her relentless pestering me of "Are you OK?!" She walks out, and turns the light off. Of course, by that time I was limp as a noodle and had to start all over again.

Shinova · Post by **Shinova** » 2002-12-30 12:46am

After reading all this, all I can say is:

You people have no control over your sex drives

Vertigo1 · Post by **Vertigo1** » 2002-12-30 01:30am

Shinova wrote:After reading all this, all I can say is:

You people have no control over your sex drives

Ohh we have control over our sex drives, we just choose not to employ such control as it would inhibit our seek for the most pleasure.

justifier · Post by **justifier** » 2002-12-30 01:33am

Never been caught but I'v come VERY close twice.I live with just my dad and he works wierd hours which gives me ample time.

1. I was at home and right in the middle of doing it when two girls from across the street knocked on the door to sell me something. My pants were across the room so I had only a robe on when I talked to them.

2. My dad had just left for work and I had started to jerk off when he came back to get a CD(which he keeps all of in my room) I had to stuff the magizine behind my computer and sort of lean on my pants to hide the erection

Does anyone ever get spontanious erections?, when you aren't thinking about anything that would turn you on but you get hard anyways

Vertigo1 · Post by **Vertigo1** » 2002-12-30 01:35am

justifier wrote:Does anyone ever get spontanious erections?, when you aren't thinking about anything that would turn you on but you get hard anyways

I used to when I was like 12 or 13 but not anymore. I only get em when I see something that arouses me.

ArmorPierce · Post by **ArmorPierce** » 2002-12-30 01:38am

humping a pillow an moaning....

Shinova · Post by **Shinova** » 2002-12-30 01:40am

ArmorPierce wrote:humping a pillow an moaning....

The lengths people will go to keep the "tap" running...

Vertigo1 · Post by **Vertigo1** » 2002-12-30 01:41am

ArmorPierce wrote:humping a pillow an moaning....

Hey, it was one of those foam pillows that had the little "points" on em. I couldn't help myself.

TrailerParkJawa · Post by **TrailerParkJawa** » 2002-12-30 01:57am

I've never been caught in the strictest sense. One time when I was 19 I jacked off in the car while I was driving. Not the smartest thing to do, but Im pretty sure some girls in a raised 4x4 saw me. They pulled up to my car and were laughing at me. This was after I was done, but mabye they saw me earlier. I dont really know.

Does anyone ever get spontanious erections?, when you aren't thinking about anything that would turn you on but you get hard anyways

This goes away as you get older. The worst part is when you are in middle school or high school and you get an erection as the teacher wants you to write on the board.

Shinova · Post by **Shinova** » 2002-12-30 02:15am

TrailerParkJawa wrote: This goes away as you get older. The worst part is when you are in middle school or high school and you get an erection as the teacher wants you to write on the board.

You people must've worn some awfully thin pants......

Post by **Beowulf** » 2002-12-30 02:17am

innerbrat wrote:
*POKE*

Haha, got there first for once.

Hey! You didn't answer the question! Have you ever gotten caught?

And to answer it for my self... No, but I've come close a couple time.

TrailerParkJawa · Post by **TrailerParkJawa** » 2002-12-30 02:19am

You people must've worn some awfully thin pants......

In 8th grade I got an erection once while on a plane. I was swearing sweat pants. I had to hold a book in front of me, while walking to the airplane.
Its always a relief when you learn in sex ed class this happens to almost all boys.

edit: changed plain to plane

Kamakazie Sith · Post by **Kamakazie Sith** » 2002-12-30 03:00am

justifier wrote:
Does anyone ever get spontanious erections?, when you aren't thinking about anything that would turn you on but you get hard anyways

I use to all the time. I don't miss them either, the urges that came with them were almost to unbearable. I've had to relieve myself in the restroom from time to time....back then.

Sorry if this is TMI, but it seems like this is what the thread is all about.

Kamakazie Sith · Post by **Kamakazie Sith** » 2002-12-30 03:01am

Shinova wrote:
TrailerParkJawa wrote: This goes away as you get older. The worst part is when you are in middle school or high school and you get an erection as the teacher wants you to write on the board.

You people must've worn some awfully thin pants......

Two words...

Gym Class....

Two more words

Gym Shorts

Vertigo1 · Post by **Vertigo1** » 2002-12-30 03:08am

What really sucks is when you get one, then some smartass yanks your jeans down infront of the whole class.

(No, it didn't happen to me, but to someone else I knew from a school I went to up in Michigan. His cheeks were redder than a fucking cherry.

)

Shinova · Post by **Shinova** » 2002-12-30 03:09am

Regarding erection during class:

Never happened to me. Must be either lucky or horribly sexually repressed. Hmm....

Kamakazie Sith · Post by **Kamakazie Sith** » 2002-12-30 03:10am

Shinova wrote:Regarding erection during class:

Never happened to me. Must be either lucky or horribly sexually repressed. Hmm....

Believe me you are lucky.

We had to run in the halls, and the girls class would always be sitting down and we had to run right by them. I bet I looked like a fucking retard everytime I passed them.

ArmorPierce · Post by **ArmorPierce** » 2002-12-30 03:13am

Don't worry, we all mature at different times

TrailerParkJawa · Post by **TrailerParkJawa** » 2002-12-30 03:23am

Shinova wrote:Regarding erection during class:

Never happened to me. Must be either lucky or horribly sexually repressed. Hmm....

I think you are lucky. Once I got a raging hard on while out at a picnic with my girlfriend and her family. I was wearing swim trunks and it was way noticable.
I just stayed in the water for a long time.