Star Wars Junkyard Wars

[paladin]

This is the best idea I've seen on the boards in a long time. Everyone's responses cracked me up!

[Isolder74]

This is the best idea I've seen on the boards in a long time. Everyone's responses cracked me up!

*takes a Bow*

Thank you very much

[Isolder74]

no votes for the crew of voyager or the Nx-01 Enterprise Crew yet

[Isolder74]

everyone's faovorite Star Trek Team is Kirk and Co right now

The current winner is Luke and Co

the runner up is Ani and Co

but this could all change

[Isolder74]

The Imperial Admiracy, they have strong tactical minds and the best team cohersion but not much talks about their mechanical abilities.

you Forget That Veear started out as a walker commander and as part of his training learnded how to repair and maintaine machinery in the field. Thrawn has also shown some good ability at adapting technology.

[2000AD]

The TPM team definately has an advantage with Aniken in there.

But how can you discount the advantage of the TNG team : Geordi LaForge. In the episodes of TNG that I have seen where Geordi made some random things up and they all worked perfectly! Evry ramshackle thing this guy makes seems to work exactly as it's meant to.

[Isolder74]

The TPM team definately has an advantage with Aniken in there.

But how can you discount the advantage of the TNG team : Geordi LaForge. In the episodes of TNG that I have seen where Geordi made some random things up and they all worked perfectly! Evry ramshackle thing this guy makes seems to work exactly as it's meant to.

I'm Not, I tried to make the most balenced teams I could

[Grand Admiral Thrawn]

Team 1:



Good team. Anakin made his super fast podracer and Threepio out of junk. Both preformed quite well. Jango has turned the Slave 1 into a killing machine. Obi-Wan...uh. It's Watto's junkyard right?


Team 2:

Also a good team. Han and Chewie made the Falcon the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy. Boba kept the Slave 1 is quite good shape, hell better. Luke has some experience with his landspeeder.

Team 3:

Slim chance. Non of these are good at building. Though Thrawn might make the other teams lose

Team 4:

Slim chance. ST tech is not that reliable at bests of times, but with junk? And their technobabble solutions won't do them much good.


Team 5:

Scotty has a reputation for pulling miracles out of his bag. Spock could help put it together. Sulu can fly it. Kirk...can, uh...

Team 6:

See team 4.

Team 7:

I hate Enterprise.

[Isolder74]

Team 1:



Good team. Anakin made his super fast podracer and Threepio out of junk. Both preformed quite well. Jango has turned the Slave 1 into a killing machine. Obi-Wan...uh. It's Watto's junkyard right?


Yes, it is Watto's Junkyard

Team 2:

Also a good team. Han and Chewie made the Falcon the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy. Boba kept the Slave 1 is quite good shape, hell better. Luke has some experience with his landspeeder.

Some very good points

Team 3:

Slim chance. Non of these are good at building. Though Thrawn might make the other teams lose

I know i forgot about Bevel Lemkish whaen i designed this team

Team 4:

Slim chance. ST tech is not that reliable at bests of times, but with junk? And their technobabble solutions won't do them much good.


True these guys need shiny new replicated parts

Team 5:

Scotty has a reputation for pulling miracles out of his bag. Spock could help put it together. Sulu can fly it. Kirk...can, uh...

The only real compitition from Trek's side

Team 6:

See team 4.

No comment

Team 7:

I hate Enterprise.

So do I

[Isolder74]

If there is a two way tie for last place how do I decide who acually came in last?

[tean-kun]

They would be the more familar with the technology. And if Hand and Chewy can get the ol' 'Flacon going, they can put anything togther.

[Darth Wong]

Probable order of finish:

#1: Team 1: Anakin, Obi-Wan, Watto, and Jango. The combination of home-field advantage (Anakin and Watto know the junkyard so they'll grab all the best parts right away), excellent driving (3 of 4 team members are superb drivers, so they can do shifts), and collectively superb combat skills (3 of 4 guys can kick some serious ass, in case somebody needs to fight for parts) gives them the easy win. And the ultimate edge is the Force: this team has two powerful Force users on it. It's simply no contest; they'll have their racer on the second leg of the race before anybody else even has their racer up and running, and nobody's going to out-drive Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Jango Fett anyway.

#2: Team 2: Luke, Han, Chewie, and Boba. 3 of 4 team members are good drivers, so they can pilot in shifts, and every one of them can kick ass in combat, so nobody's taking their stuff away.

#3: Team 5: Scotty, Kirk, Spock, and Sulu. Nobody in Trek can jury-rig stuff like Scotty, so their team would be the first of the Trek teams to build a working racer. Unfortunately, they're a piece-wise team. Scotty handles the engineering, Sulu can do the driving, and everybody else is basically useless. It's not like the previous teams, where they've got two or three guys to handle any task. Spock would be sitting around complaining that racing is an illogical activity, and Kirk would be out trying to bang some blue-skinned Twilek slave girl.

DNF: Team 7: a bunch of characters from "Enterprise". They do not exist in the proper continuity of Star Trek. The ghost of Gene Roddenberry appears, waves his hand, and they vanish into thin air.

DNF: Team 3: Piett, Veers, Needa, Thrawn. They're a team of delegators. They'll sit around trying to give each other orders and jockey for power until somebody gets pissed off and starts shooting. Thrawn survives and stalks away in anger, the rest die.

DNF: Team 4: Data, Barclay, Laforge, Riker. They come up with a brilliant plan after just 3 minutes in a conference room, then fan out into the junkyard only to discover that there's nothing in the junkyard but ... junk. After three laborious weeks, they finally have a racer up and running. They set off on the first leg of the race, but there's a 0.4% imbalance in the plasma coil magneto-hydrodynamic pulse resonance, and the racer explodes, killing the entire team.

DNF: Team 6: Janeway, 7 of 9, Torres, Kim. Janeway is captured and slowly tortured to death by Tusken raiders because everyone hates her so much that they leave her hogtied at the nearest encampment. And there was much rejoicing. Kim spends all his time trying to help the other teams. 7 of 9 and Torres bicker about proper procedure, until Torres throws a punch. At this point, they fight until they both fall to the ground. Suddenly, with their two bodies in proximity, Torres feels drawn to 7 of 9's full, pouting lips. The two look into each others' eyes, and no more need be said. Torres rips off 7 of 9's shirt to expose her full, luscious breasts, and her tongue plays over 7 of 9's hardening nipples while her trembling hand reaches down, down into her hot, nether ... wait, what was this thread about again?

[Isolder74]

Darth Wong your post is about the funniest one i've received on the topic yet.

and i like your comentary as well

Thank you

[Master of Ossus]

Probable order of finish:

DNF: Team 7: a bunch of characters from "Enterprise". They do not exist in the proper continuity of Star Trek. The ghost of Gene Roddenberry appears, waves his hand, and they vanish into thin air.

Gene Roddenberry is rolling around in his grave, because of them.

[Isolder74]

Probable order of finish:

DNF: Team 7: a bunch of characters from "Enterprise". They do not exist in the proper continuity of Star Trek. The ghost of Gene Roddenberry appears, waves his hand, and they vanish into thin air.

Gene Roddenberry is rolling around in his grave, because of them.

you mean his urn in orbit

[Isolder74]

Is everyone forgeting that in Junkyard Wars you have a time limit to build your machine, in this case all teams would get two days with 10 hours each to built their Sand buggy/Swamp/Water racer

[Isolder74]

also the judges will worry about getting your race from Tattoine to Degoga to Mon Calamari

[Isolder74]

Possible group vehicles

Team 1

Some form of Podracer, since it hovers it would be good on tatooine and Mon Calimari. they might have trouble with the trees on degoba though

Team 2

These guys would probably build some sort of airspeeder. since it fly they should have no trouble with any terrein except the Trees of degoba

Team 3

With Veers on the team they will probably build some kind of walker. It would be slow, so won't come in first in legs 1 and 3 but it would have the advandage in leg 2

Team 4

Whatever Happenes Barclay will do something stupid. their vehicle would probably hover and have ok speed But it would look far better than it would really preform.

Team 5

Scotty would cobble togather something that would look like a Star Trek Shuttlecraft and since it would have limited flight would be well suited for legs 1 and 3

Team 6

They would Build something that would look like the Delta Flyer. but i doubt it would run very well

Team 7
These guys would build some 4-Wheel drive Jeep like thing. that is assuming they acually finish something

[Darth Yoshi]

Tough call. Teams 1 & 2 are both excellent. But I have to go with #2 because Anakin is liable to go nuts and pull a Vader, killing everyone else on the team.

[SirNitram]

At request I was asked to throw in my two cents. Team One wins, as Anakin can fix anything. Even if Jango is infeiror to his son.

[Anarchist Bunny]

Team 1: Anakin Skywalker, Obi Wan Kenobi, Watto, Jango Fett
Obi's worthless, Anakin will construct, Watto can find parts quick, and Jango can shoot anyone from team 3 down if parts are at risk.
Team 2: Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, Chewbacca, Boba Fett
Luke, Han, Chewie can build, all can pilot, and Boba, Han, and Chewie can shoot anyone from the other teams for parts, but can't find good parts as fast. Han and Chewie have the advantage of working with out having to stop or hell, even slow down.
Team 3: Admirial Piett, General Veers, Captain Needa, Grand Admirial Thrawn
Might beable to make some sort of bicycle, or maybe if they are we allow them to have some mechanical knowledge something better. But thrawn could probly beable to tell the others how to properly sabotoge the other contestants ships.
Team 4: Data, Reginald Barclay, Georti La Forge, Commander Riker
Data can beat off anyone from Teamn 3 down(he couldn't beat invincable kirk but make him fall back with shirts set on ripped) Barclay will run right into a Fett's blaster and get blown to pieces, Georti and Data will do much of the construction, and Riker and Data will have to do piloting.
Team 5: Scotty, Kirk, Spock, Sulu
Scotty can make it happen, Spock can figure the best way to do it, Sulu can pilot it, and Kirk can beat the crap out of anyone from Teamn 3, 6, or 7. 1 man for every job but no crossing over in abilities.
Team 6: Janeway, Seven of Nine, B'Elanna Torres, Ensign Kim
B'Elanna does all the work, Seven and Kim go fuck, come back and say they enhanced it with borg technology, Janeway's worthless.
Team 7: Captain Archer, Charles Tucker, Travis Mayweather, T'Pol
I take my switch-claymore to all of them and serve them up to the rest of the contestants.
The race
Team 1
Probly a land speeder of some sort or a large pod. Does awsome the first leg, crap through the second since pods aren't best for low speeds(pod may start dragging if going to slow, may hit a tree if going to fast) and ok during the third leg unless they can't handle the sabotage.
Team 2
Probly a landspeeder or a something that flys a little higher like the snowspeeder. Does great through the first leg, bad through the second(although not as bad as Team 1) and good the third leg. Probly can handle the sabotage.
Team 3
Veers was a AT-AT driver right? So a walker. Crap first leg, probly the best during the second leg if they don't sink into the swamp, and I'll give them the make the walker able to float and paddle their way to last place during the third. But they don't have to deal with sabotage.
Team 4
Barclays dead so the craft isn't as wieghted down, probly shuttle like or hovercraft. First leg, sand gets in the systems, blows up. If they make it to the second leg, Big swamp monster grabs the craft, blows up. My giant fate they get to the third leg, ill tempered sea bass strikes the craft, blows up.Sabotage is the wild card, it can cause the craft to blow up in any of the legs.
Team 5
Slowly makes it through all the courses, probly can deal with the sabotage, but just "doesn't have enough power" to take the win.
Team 6
Janeway makes B'Elanna diverge from the course to check out a interesting culture living in the desert, Tusken Raiders kill them all except Seven who they keep as a sex slave.
Team 7
Is very much enjoyed by all the contestants except for Anakin who thinks they taste a little salty.
Winner
Team 2, Just too diverse and specializing in all aspects of the compotion.
Team 1 doesn't do it because of Obi's dead wieght in the compotion.[/i]

[Isolder74]

This is getting too funny, I am going to die from laughter if this keeps up. Wait this this is suppost to be funny, never mind

[oberon]

The TOS crew would win, they're all top notch brains, sneakiness, fortitude, and skill. That, and they've been an ace team forever. It would come down to them versus Han Chewie and Luke--Boba is a good addition, but these guys don't like each other and they've never worked as a team, so while they work out their "issues", Kirk and Spock sneak in ( like in the movies when people get distracted and all of a sudden don't have any peripheral vision to see the things going on in the background while their heads are turned to the side) and swipe all their parts. This means that Boba has a new job, but after they steal the stuff the ST team is gg to expect someone to try to steal it back and they'll keep a watch.

I wrote this with my own modification in mind, which is that the rules are identical to the show--you can steal with stealth, but you can't strong-arm people, hurt or kill them, threaten them, or sabotage their project in any other way. You can, however, negotiate if someone steals your stuff. Here, the Jedis could have an advantage, as I don't rule out Force powers, since they can't use them to do things people can't do normally, albeit more slowly. So if you can't kill with your hands, then you can't do it with the Force either, but since you are allowed to negotiate, they can do that all they want. This means that you can't use the Force to steal stuff if it's being watched, but since you can steal unguarded stuff, then it's fair game too. Why do people put Jedi in situations like this then go "and no using Jedi talents."?

Oh, and you gotta have Uhura on this team for her miniskirt quotient.

[Isolder74]

maybe we can let theJedi's use their mind trick but that will be pushing it. The No force Powers Tthings comes from an earlier post by Mr Bean. That is is to force our Jedis into actually built a machine. Imagine a boat with no engine and the Jedi Telekinesisng the the Propeller shaft. no fun there.

[Grand Admiral Thrawn]

DNF: Team 6: Janeway, 7 of 9, Torres, Kim. Janeway is captured and slowly tortured to death by Tusken raiders because everyone hates her so much that they leave her hogtied at the nearest encampment. And there was much rejoicing. Kim spends all his time trying to help the other teams. 7 of 9 and Torres bicker about proper procedure, until Torres throws a punch. At this point, they fight until they both fall to the ground. Suddenly, with their two bodies in proximity, Torres feels drawn to 7 of 9's full, pouting lips. The two look into each others' eyes, and no more need be said. Torres rips off 7 of 9's shirt to expose her full, luscious breasts, and her tongue plays over 7 of 9's hardening nipples while her trembling hand reaches down, down into her hot, nether ... wait, what was this thread about again?

LOL