23 minutes in hell

Shrykull · Post by **Shrykull** » 2007-10-07 04:48am

http://www.spiritlessons.com/

Eris · Post by **Eris** » 2007-10-07 05:16am

Please please please tell me that is parody. It has to be, even if it looks dead serious. That's becoming a serious problem on the internet. I can no longer tell whether things are trying to be skeweringly witty, or are really endorsing the absurdity they wave about. I keep saying this, but no matter how many times I do, something comes along that leaves me agape.

I think I have to go cry now. I mean, I can't even snark at it. "Heaven is so Real!"? I couldn't get any lamer than that if I tried.

Winston Blake · Post by **Winston Blake** » 2007-10-07 05:49am

JESUS: "Giant-crucifix-shuriken-attack! Ki-ya!"
CROWD: *terrified screams*

Covenant · Post by **Covenant** » 2007-10-07 05:54am

Winston Blake wrote:
JESUS: "Giant-crucifix-shuriken-attack! Ki-ya!"
CROWD: *terrified screams*

The first thing I thought of was "FEED THE JESUS!", since it seemed to be a giant ramp leading right to the Mouth of the Lord, so to speak. Only your souls can complete his power! Leap into the jaws of Love!

Shrykull · Post by **Shrykull** » 2007-10-07 05:56am

Eris wrote:Please please please tell me that is parody. It has to be, even if it looks dead serious. That's becoming a serious problem on the internet. I can no longer tell whether things are trying to be skeweringly witty, or are really endorsing the absurdity they wave about. I keep saying this, but no matter how many times I do, something comes along that leaves me agape.

I think I have to go cry now. I mean, I can't even snark at it. "Heaven is so Real!"? I couldn't get any lamer than that if I tried.

I got the link from a guy on paltalk trying to "educate" atheists. I really think he is serious.

Rawtooth · Post by **Rawtooth** » 2007-10-07 06:45am

God, I look at all this nonsense and think on just how bloody easy it would be to write up some piece of shit and sell it for the big bucks. It's so tempting...

Jaepheth · Post by **Jaepheth** » 2007-10-07 03:46pm

A parody site would be cleaner and better put together.

And the pic needs more Evel:

Master of Ossus · Post by **Master of Ossus** » 2007-10-07 05:39pm

Was the "23 minutes in hell" thing supposed to refer to the audience listening to that lecture, 'cause the video lasts about an hour.

Drowsong · Post by **Drowsong** » 2007-10-07 06:59pm

Master of Ossus wrote:Was the "23 minutes in hell" thing supposed to refer to the audience listening to that lecture, 'cause the video lasts about an hour.

No, it refers to the duration this dude spent in Hell.

Remember, he knows he started at 3:00am, because...well he doesn't know how he knows, he just knows. He's very certain that it was that, because God let him know (for some reason).

And his wife heard him screaming roughly 23 minutes after that, because, like any good person hearing their spouse screaming in pain, she checked to see what time it was.

Master of Ossus · Post by **Master of Ossus** » 2007-10-07 07:11pm

Drowsong wrote:No, it refers to the duration this dude spent in Hell.

Remember, he knows he started at 3:00am, because...well he doesn't know how he knows, he just knows. He's very certain that it was that, because God let him know (for some reason).

And his wife heard him screaming roughly 23 minutes after that, because, like any good person hearing their spouse screaming in pain, she checked to see what time it was.

Ummm... that was a joke. I watched the vid, too.

Drowsong · Post by **Drowsong** » 2007-10-07 07:50pm

Master of Ossus wrote:
Drowsong wrote:No, it refers to the duration this dude spent in Hell.

Remember, he knows he started at 3:00am, because...well he doesn't know how he knows, he just knows. He's very certain that it was that, because God let him know (for some reason).

And his wife heard him screaming roughly 23 minutes after that, because, like any good person hearing their spouse screaming in pain, she checked to see what time it was.
Ummm... that was a joke. I watched the vid, too.

So I can't add to your joke?

Darth Servo · Post by **Darth Servo** » 2007-10-07 07:52pm

I guess this idiot has never had a nightmare before?

Drowsong · Post by **Drowsong** » 2007-10-07 08:13pm

Darth Servo wrote:I guess this idiot has never had a nightmare before?

Yeah, I noticed the way he describes pain seems to be similar to "dream pain."

Soontir C'boath · Post by **Soontir C'boath** » 2007-10-07 08:23pm

Drowsong wrote:
Master of Ossus wrote:
Drowsong wrote:No, it refers to the duration this dude spent in Hell.
Remember, he knows he started at 3:00am, because...well he doesn't know how he knows, he just knows. He's very certain that it was that, because God let him know (for some reason).
And his wife heard him screaming roughly 23 minutes after that, because, like any good person hearing their spouse screaming in pain, she checked to see what time it was.
Ummm... that was a joke. I watched the vid, too.
So I can't add to your joke?

Drow, your joke sucked so bad it wasn't even recognized as one.

Wow, not a single "send in a check of $9.95 + shipping and handling" on this site at all.

Count Dooku · Post by **Count Dooku** » 2007-10-07 09:07pm

Soontir C'boath wrote:
Drowsong wrote:
Master of Ossus wrote:Ummm... that was a joke. I watched the vid, too.
So I can't add to your joke?
Drow, your joke sucked so bad it wasn't even recognized as one.

Wow, not a single "send in a check of $9.95 + shipping and handling" on this site at all.

The end of the video did tell you where to buy his book, heh.

Darth Servo · Post by **Darth Servo** » 2007-10-07 09:08pm

Count Dooku wrote:The end of the video did tell you where to buy his book, heh.

Don't tell us you actually managed to watch the whole thing. You fast-forwarded to the end, right?

Wyrm · Post by **Wyrm** » 2007-10-07 11:18pm

I thought devout Christians like you don't go to hell. Period.

Thanks for destroying Pascal's Wager, preacher-man.