Some bad shit happened today...

Rathark · Post by **Rathark** » 2003-01-15 05:46am

http://www.orionsarm.com/eg/w/Wo-Wz.html#Wup

This is where the future is heading.

Dodge · Post by **Dodge** » 2003-01-15 06:27am

Exonerate wrote:How hard is it to shit in the crapper???

This is a question I've asked myself on visiting certain public lavatories, and each time I've not believed what I've seen.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi wrote:I laughed my ass off reading that. I've been is restrooms with no toilet paper, clogged-up toilets, and a horrible stench coming from the toilets, but nothing close to someone who shat all over the place...

Where I work, we had some temporary staff in for a while, and during that period the toilets took a right hammering. Seats were removed and hung from coatpegs, shit was daubed on cubicle walls, etc. etc. I wasn't particularly surprised at the instant cessation of this behaviour when these temporary people left!

jaeger115 wrote:Reminds me of the time I saw a toilet which bowl was full of shit TO THE BRIM! It was so full that the water was on the floor, and the shit was bulging out of the bowl and bubbling.... *shudders*

I shudder with you, my friend.

Shinova wrote:How does one smear that stuff all over the walls?

I've seen piles of it on the floor several times, but how the hell do you get it on the walls??

Presumably with their hands/fingers, in the absence of a putty knife.

anarchistbunny wrote:I always it would be funny to take a shit in the sink or urinal just for the response it would cause by people. Of course the water fountain would be halarious too, cause you could wait around and watch the responses and not seem wierd.

I once lived in a rented flat where the landlady never dealt with the problem of rising damp in a bedroom intended for my toddler. When I left, I was sorely tempted to drain the water from the toilet bowl and curl one out. That would have been one in the eye for her. But I didn't. I was just glad to be out of that place.

Darth Pounder wrote:THis is why i never shit in public toilets. Even when i was in school i'd have walked out and came home rather then use public toilets. Now i have ass muscles with the strength of steel and can hold it for near a day.

My wife flatly refuses to use public lavatories. She too has buns of steel. But what makes me wonder is that she's referring to women's toilets!!!??

Vertigo1 wrote:I'm sorry, but I can't help but laugh at some of these stories. You people are hilarious.

It's so perverse and disgusting that laughter is the only way to deal with this topic.

Crayz9000 wrote:Corvallis, OR.
A Portland woman had complained to the water department after her water bill increased 150% for no apparent reason. Investigators soon discovered there WAS a reason. While the woman was at work during the day, her cat would repeatedly flush the toilet while she was gone. After locking the cat out of the bathroom during the day, the woman's water bill returned to normal.

Seattle, WA.
Toilets, sinks and urinals at the King County Courthouse exploded after a workman accidentally connected a high pressure air compressor to the plumbing system. Men and women in soaked business suits ran out of restrooms after toilet bowls erupted and wall urinals shot water clear across the bathrooms.

Schererville, IN.
An intoxicated man angered by a slow-flushing toilet at a restaurant, shot it to pieces with his semiautomatic handgun after a night of St. Patrick's Day reveling.

Newark, NJ.
Eugene Trowbridge of Newark, NJ, was blown off his toilet when a city sewer crew turned on a high-pressure sewer-cleaning hose in the main outside his house.

Shooting the toilet is something that I've fantasised about from time to time, but only when the thing is plastered with excrement. It's sorta like putting it out of its misery.

People who defile public toilets should have the following done to them:

1) Heads flushed down the pan (whatever its condition)
2) Forced to clean the mess up
3) Shot in the stomach with a .22 hunting rifle and left to rot

Dirty Harry · Post by **Dirty Harry** » 2003-01-15 08:03am

Schererville, IN.
An intoxicated man angered by a slow-flushing toilet at a restaurant, shot it to pieces with his semiautomatic handgun after a night of St. Patrick's Day reveling.

I,like Dogde, have contemplated blowing one toilet or another to smoking shards over the years ( and probably would have to had the means been at hand).

Some of the stories here are bad, but their are worse things. Picture cleaning out a toilet clogged up with your own shit with nothing but a bent wire-coathanger.

His Divine Shadow · Post by **His Divine Shadow** » 2003-01-15 02:43pm

Exonerate wrote:How hard is it to shit in the crapper???

The day that question is asked not in jest is the time we ought to destroy mankind.

Oh...

His Divine Shadow · Post by **His Divine Shadow** » 2003-01-15 02:50pm

Darth Pounder wrote:THis is why i never shit in public toilets. Even when i was in school i'd have walked out and came home rather then use public toilets. Now i have ass muscles with the strength of steel and can hold it for near a day.

Fucking weakling! I've held it for 8 DAYS! (Once in the army on a really really baad excersize, ofcourse I have no trouble with 5 days, I've had to do that before)

johnmarkley · Post by **johnmarkley** » 2003-01-15 06:19pm

Never, EVER use the toilet at a gas station, especially a rural one. Some of the vilest places I've ever seen. It's like stepping through a portal to Hell.

Next of Kin · Post by **Next of Kin** » 2003-01-15 06:34pm

Falkenhorst wrote:FALKENH0RST (7:54:24 PM): and suddenly someone in one of the stalls unleashed a GIANT stuttering stream of farts and diareahha
FALKENH0RST (7:54:56 PM): and it started smelling like a fucking barnyard or a sewer or some bastardized combo of both

Man, you should have asked for a courtesy flush!

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-01-15 07:14pm

Next of Kin wrote:
Falkenhorst wrote:FALKENH0RST (7:54:24 PM): and suddenly someone in one of the stalls unleashed a GIANT stuttering stream of farts and diareahha
FALKENH0RST (7:54:56 PM): and it started smelling like a fucking barnyard or a sewer or some bastardized combo of both
Man, you should have asked for a courtesy flush!

Forget a courtesy flush, you should have trapped the fatass in there.

On another note, I can't see how anyone could enjoy doing stuff like that. When my fiungers smell anything like shit, I rinse my hands for a minute. But, there are probably people out there that think shit is a fingerpaint.

Korvan · Post by **Korvan** » 2003-01-15 08:10pm

A few years back I was looking for a room to rent. A lady had a spare room and gave me a tour of the house. When we got to the bathroom, she mentioned that something was wrong with the toilet so it couldn't flush any paper.

Right beside the toilet was a waste can, full to the brim of used toilet paper. Needless to say, I kept on looking.

Vertigo1 · Post by **Vertigo1** » 2003-01-16 12:36am

The Yosemite Bear wrote:Actually, that's what we nerds did to the Gym complex water system after some annoying mean spirited pranks by the Jocks.....

ROFL! Did it explode?

Next time, toss a 9V battery into a toilet. Lets just say it gets an...interesting reaction out of the moron that pisses in it.

Singular Quartet · Post by **Singular Quartet** » 2003-01-16 12:50am

Sokar wrote:
Falkenhorst wrote:One time, in the same store before they remodeled it, someone wrote, in BLACK PERMANENT MARKER, on the TOILET SEAT,

"I TOOK A CHAMPION 14 INCH SHIT IN THIS TOILET"

I shit you not.
We had a rather talented artist visiting our restrooms for a while, to bad his 'art' was gay men having anal sex with gigantic genitalia.........scary thing was that his style was incredible for just using a Sharpie marker, too bad it was that theme and in a Wal-Mart shitter.

I'd say I know that person, but the person I know is female, and has an extreme facination of Gundam Wing pilots...

Frank Hipper · Post by **Frank Hipper** » 2003-01-16 01:07am

Korvan wrote:A few years back I was looking for a room to rent. A lady had a spare room and gave me a tour of the house. When we got to the bathroom, she mentioned that something was wrong with the toilet so it couldn't flush any paper.

Right beside the toilet was a waste can, full to the brim of used toilet paper. Needless to say, I kept on looking.

In Mexico, the sewers can't handle toilet paper, same situation, other people's poo.

Dodge · Post by **Dodge** » 2003-01-16 03:34am

Korvan wrote:A few years back I was looking for a room to rent. A lady had a spare room and gave me a tour of the house. When we got to the bathroom, she mentioned that something was wrong with the toilet so it couldn't flush any paper.

Right beside the toilet was a waste can, full to the brim of used toilet paper. Needless to say, I kept on looking.

Fucking hell, man. Too right you kept on looking. I would have moved onto a park bench instead of that shithole!!

Bleuuurgghhhh!!!

Rathark · Post by **Rathark** » 2003-01-16 07:45am

Korvan wrote:A few years back I was looking for a room to rent. A lady had a spare room and gave me a tour of the house. When we got to the bathroom, she mentioned that something was wrong with the toilet so it couldn't flush any paper.

Right beside the toilet was a waste can, full to the brim of used toilet paper. Needless to say, I kept on looking.

Almost every public toilet in Korea is exactly like that.

Except most of them are also just holes in the floor. There's nothing to sit on; you just squat.

Plus I should mention that most of these public toilets have NO SOAP in the wash basins. Hell, some don't even have basins, just a tap on the wall over a bucket, or over nothing but a drain in the floor.

When you actually feel more home in Big Bad Western Department Stores, you know something's wrong.

Give me fast food, multiplexes, shopping malls and decadent slick-haired designer suited hi-tech Western Imperialism any day.

Dodge · Post by **Dodge** » 2003-01-16 08:40am

Oh no, I've just remembered something equally revolting:

http://www.scatlovers.com

Now, I warn you that this URL is repulsively horrid, and that's why I haven't made it a hyperlink. IN OTHER WORDS, if you are curious enough to visit, you'll have to enter it into a browser address field manually!

Now wash your hands...

Jadeite · Post by **Jadeite** » 2003-01-16 10:00pm

Picture cleaning out a toilet clogged up with your own shit with nothing but a bent wire-coathanger.

LOL, Iv seen that before, I was on an overnight field trip once, and my roommate accidentaly clogged the toilet with his shit, and had to use a coathanger to unclog it. Iv also been in a movie theater before, where several stalls had shit smeared all over them.

Next of Kin · Post by **Next of Kin** » 2003-01-16 10:13pm

Did the stall look like this?

http://www.smeg.co.uk/gfx/poo/napalm.jpg

Warning: please don't click on the link if you have a weak stomach

Post by **Dalton** » 2003-01-16 10:19pm

Oh dear fucking Christ. I'd lock this thread, but it's actually on topic.

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2003-01-16 10:56pm

Jadeite wrote:
Picture cleaning out a toilet clogged up with your own shit with nothing but a bent wire-coathanger.
LOL, Iv seen that before, I was on an overnight field trip once, and my roommate accidentaly clogged the toilet with his shit, and had to use a coathanger to unclog it. Iv also been in a movie theater before, where several stalls had shit smeared all over them.

If your shitting that much, flush a couple times through out the course of the shit to keep the bowl from filling up.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-01-16 11:00pm

Sea Skimmer wrote:If your shitting that much, flush a couple times through out the course of the shit to keep the bowl from filling up.

Or go see a medical doctor, because as Hank Hill would say, that just ain't right.

Frank Hipper · Post by **Frank Hipper** » 2003-01-17 12:58am

Next of Kin wrote:Did the stall look like this?

http://www.smeg.co.uk/gfx/poo/napalm.jpg

Warning: please don't click on the link if you have a weak stomach

GAAAAHHHHH! Eyes...goggles....nothing.....

Here's one... About ten years ago I was staying with a band at their warehouse. These chicks came over for an after-party, and apparently thought that 6 guys living together must have a nasty toilet. Too natsy for them to sit on. Consequently, these bitches sprayed piss all over our toilet based on an assumption that WE lacked hygiene.

Dodge · Post by **Dodge** » 2003-01-17 09:04am

Icehawk wrote:I work at a huge Chapters bookstore. We have had some crazy stuff happen but surprisingly we have only had one actual "shit smearing on the wall" incident and it was in the Womans washroom surprisingly.

However there was one time I just went into the washroom to take a piss and some other guy comes in after me and heads into the stall. A few seconds later I hear a couple of huge farts and some grunting and then large spew of diarreah. The guy then started constantly making these sickly heaving sounds and continued to fart and blast his shit into the can.

Needless to say it was fucking hillarious and I almost got caught standing there laughing my ass off when someone else came in. Surprisingly and thankfully the guy managed to contain his nastyness to the can and didn't get it all over the place.

This has happened to me at work! There I was, quietly sitting doing the business quite early in the day. Then, suddenly, the door to the restroom burst open and footsteps hurried to a cubicle, slamming it shut behind them. I then heard frenzied attempts at unzipping and dropping trousers just in time! As soon as the arse was on the seat a flurry of farts immediately commenced. This flurry was punctuated by splashes and the sound of rushing fluid...

For some reason I also found it so outrageous that I was in fits (how I kept silent is beyond me) and was still laughing sporadically throughout the day and long into the evening.

This thread is funny shit!!

StarDestroyer.Net BBS

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