Motorcycle porn (56k will die, seriously)

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Civil War Man
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Motorcycle porn (56k will die, seriously)

Post by Civil War Man »

Most of you are probably aware that I work for a company that makes electric cycles. I am currently in Milan, Italy, working at the EICMA show. For those who don't know, it is huge. By far the largest in Europe, and as far as I know potentially the largest in the world. Over the course of today, I have taken over 100 pictures (on my cell phone, so not the best quality). Here I selected what I believe would present a decent cross section of the show in general. Keep in mind that there is a good deal of fanservice. There are a couple that might edge towards the work safe border, depending on how uptight your workplace is, but almost all of them are perfectly tame.

Anyway, let's get this rolling. We shall start off simple. This is the model I work with, and right now the only one we have on the market.
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We market the model to city commuters, plus we've been courting a number of governmental entities such as police agencies
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We are a new company, but we don't fool around. Our display this year consists of our marketing booth.
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A large tent to cover selling apparel, etc (picture taken Monday before the show)
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And a test track (also taken Monday)
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Our big thing this year was showing off our prototype 3-wheelers
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As well as some add-ons like a cargo pod and canopy
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Plus showing off the concept model of our sport bike
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The show itself has just about anything you could want that comes on 2 wheels. There are scooters
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Sport bikes
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Cruisers
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Touring models (yes, that's a Goldwing)
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And beyond
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There are bikes for kids
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And bikes that are small enough for kids
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Insert FLCL reference here
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Besides bikes, there was also apparel
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Including really cool-looking custom stuff
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Last edited by Civil War Man on 2007-11-06 07:16pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Post by Civil War Man »

Anyway, we may have pandered to the crowd a bit
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But of course, so did everyone else
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And I mean everyone
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No, seriously
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It almost was comical how many models were on display with the bikes
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Not that I'm complaining, mind you
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Plus, it's not like it's a tried and true business model
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It's only natural to have models showing off motor vehicles
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Helps draw attention to the motorcycles being shown off
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In the interest of not posting 5 million pictures, I cut out most of them. Really, they were everywhere.
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Of course, some attempted to kick it up a notch
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The winner, though, in my opinion, is Marzocchi. They don't even make motorcycles. They make wheel forks for motorcycles (my company uses them for our bikes). That doesn't stop them from apparently having their own personal model, who apparently really sells those wheel forks well, since she was there signing posters. I didn't get a picture of her, but I thought the display was absolutely hilarious. Seriously. The only thing they sell are wheel forks.
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Post by Kanastrous »

The electric superbike looks darned cool.

And the red...Benelli (?)...it looks like, with the brunette...

Shame on the girl on #59! She's not wearing proper safety gear!

Most of those are too scootery, too cruisery, or too weird, for me...but if you work with bikes, you're cool in my book!

When does that Vectrix superbike hit the market?
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Post by Civil War Man »

Kanastrous wrote:The electric superbike looks darned cool.

And the red...Benelli (?)...it looks like, with the brunette...

Shame on the girl on #59! She's not wearing proper safety gear!

Most of those are too scootery, too cruisery, or too weird, for me...but if you work with bikes, you're cool in my book!

When does that Vectrix superbike hit the market?
Not sure which red bike you mean, though none of the red bikes pictured with models next to them were Benellis. The red ones pictured with brunettes (not including Vectrix) were Ducati.

As for the superbike, it's planned on being a very limited, and very expensive, production. I hope there's enough demand to do more of a mass-production, but at the moment we are mainly doing it to show that we are top of the line when it comes to electric vehicles. We pretty much already are, but making an electric bike that can hit 120 and actual sustain it for several miles will basically demonstrate that we can kick everyone else's collective asses.
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Post by Civil War Man »

Alright. Let's get to some more. These are pictures I've taken over the past couple days (plus a few I left out from my original 100+)

My last slew of pictures was showing off a few of the models that could be found hanging off of the bikes. It should be noted that, while it was prevalent, it wasn't the only way to entertain the people at the show.

There was, for example, bike tricks.
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As well as a motocross track
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And even just really impressive displays
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I am including this because the computer hooked up to their TV performed some sort of illegal operation (it was in Italian, so I couldn't tell you what program crashed)
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This is the physical incarnation of everything that is a Harley Davidson, including the part about it being a Harley Davidson
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A three-cylinder racing bike (the third is strapped to the bottom). According to the presenters, it hasn't been road tested yet. And I'm glad I'm not first in that line.
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Here is a pretty slick looking bike from Suzuki, the B-King.
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Of course, that doesn't compare to...

The Hayabusa
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I'll stop there, to give you fast bike enthusiasts out there time to get a fresh pair of underwear.
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Post by Kanastrous »

*underwear changed*

ready for the next batch!
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Post by aerius »

Civil War Man wrote:The winner, though, in my opinion, is Marzocchi. They don't even make motorcycles. They make wheel forks for motorcycles (my company uses them for our bikes). That doesn't stop them from apparently having their own personal model, who apparently really sells those wheel forks well, since she was there signing posters. I didn't get a picture of her, but I thought the display was absolutely hilarious. Seriously. The only thing they sell are wheel forks.
No kidding, I remember hanging around the Marzocchi booth at a bicycle show a while back and they had 2 models posing with the forks and talking to people and a couple more signing posters for people. They also have the best posters, here's the one I got from the show.

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Post by Civil War Man »

They don't quite look like the one at EICMA, but I could be wrong. Do you recall if either of them didn't speak English too well? (I think the model at EICMA is from somewhere in South America)

On that note, here is some more motorcycles. Check out those...wheels.
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This one just struck me as kinda kinky
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Two of the other models that was working at the Vectrix booth.
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Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. We had six female models. Plus as far as I could tell, we were the only ones with a male model. You know, in the interest of diversity or shit like that.
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Post by Kanastrous »

Girls buy bikes, too!
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Post by Civil War Man »

You know, thinking on it, if the Vectrix and Suzuki booths were close together, it would be kinda funny to get a picture of that model in the "stripper pretending to be a police officer" outfit on the Vectrix police model we have on display. :P
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Post by Zor »

I wonder how those three wheeled moterbike vehicles (and i have seen them, i walk by a Vespa dealership on my way to university) handle and how fun they are to drive.

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Post by Civil War Man »

I haven't driven the Piaggio MP3 (which is what you've seen outside the Vespa dealership), but I have done a couple runs on the Vectrix 3 wheel prototypes. It definitely feels a little weird at first, but all in all it runs like a regular motorcycle at most speeds. Only difference is that you can lock the wheels at slow speed so you don't have to put your feet down and balance.

Of course, I think our model is cool mostly because Vectrix bikes have a fully functional reverse gear. So it's sometimes fun to just lock the front wheels and then slowly cruise around, randomly shifting from forward to reverse.
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Post by Havok »

Civil War Man wrote: This is the physical incarnation of everything that is a Harley Davidson, including the part about it being a Harley Davidson
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Ugh. I hate those. They suck.
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It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark... and we're wearing sunglasses.
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Post by aerius »

Civil War Man wrote:They don't quite look like the one at EICMA, but I could be wrong. Do you recall if either of them didn't speak English too well? (I think the model at EICMA is from somewhere in South America)
To be honest I can't remember as I was quite distracted at the time. I was basically like "mmm....hot models...lots of cleavage...drool...oh god I have to adjust my pants!"
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Say, do you want it to be a threesome with your wife? Or a foursome with your wife and sister-in-law? I'm up for either. :P
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Post by Kanastrous »

havokeff wrote:
Ugh. I hate those. They suck.
500 pounds of chrome, in the shape of a motorcycle?

What's not to like? :wink:
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Post by Havok »

They are turds. I've ridden hundreds of them. They are the worst riding Harleys. That particular Softail is the 105th Anniversary Heritage Classic, otherwise known as the FLSTCI, and is amazingly ugly in person.
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Post by Civil War Man »

Yeah, that Harley was pretty ugly. Even so, it is just so much of a Harley that it is really the only possible thing it could ever be.

It's basically all the characteristics of a Harley with all the features exaggerated to comical proportions.
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Post by Civil War Man »

aerius wrote:
Civil War Man wrote:They don't quite look like the one at EICMA, but I could be wrong. Do you recall if either of them didn't speak English too well? (I think the model at EICMA is from somewhere in South America)
To be honest I can't remember as I was quite distracted at the time. I was basically like "mmm....hot models...lots of cleavage...drool...oh god I have to adjust my pants!"
I guess I was able to pick up on more details since the pictures I took were for the purpose of emphasizing the atmosphere of the show. The massive amounts of cleavage was just a bonus.

By the way, while walking around during the times when the show was open to the public, I noticed that whenever there was a sizeable crowd gathered (sometimes to the point of being unable to move), there was one of these things:

A: A woman in tight clothes sitting on a motorcycle
B: Someone giving away free shit
C: Multiple women in tight clothes in the general proximity of motorcycles
D: Some guy yelling stuff I can't understand in Italian into a microphone

P.S. More pictures to come later, including one from a display for a company that does exhaust work. The girls there were all wearing devil horns, so if they had pitchforks and spiked tails it would have surpassed the above model in the police-ish getup for random kinkiness.
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