Unnamed loser I 1st met in Korea then alter here at Riley.
1) Pathological liar and bullshitter.
*When on leave in Chicago he claimed he delivered pizza to the Bears cheerleaders which oh btw, don't exist. (He even made this claim in the presence of a known Bears-guru lol)
*Claims to know kung-fu. One of the few times he pissed someone off enough to get them ready to bust his chops he completely whithers and begs for mercy.
2) Horrible at talking to women and makes terrible decisions.
*Is generally completely uninteresting but will talk to any girl randomly and posseses a preternatural inability to get a hint. Will literally not stop talking until you physically put a door between you and him at his worst and most stubborn. (Actually this applies to talking to guys too, he just doesn't know when or how to shut up and has to be told to often enough)
*Married a "drinky girl" while stationed in Korea. He never got her a green card and she's in the Phillipines and he in Kansas. God knows how much of his money goes to her or if he's already divorced either.
3) Ugly as fuck. I'm sorry if that sounds mean but damn.
4) A free-spirit... In mostly a funny way but it still makes him a loser just cause of who he is. He bought a Michael Jackson knock-off outfit and even had the one white glove. That really was just hilarious
5) Idiot in general. I don't even know each Article 15 he got but he went from E-4 to E-1 one rank at a time. One I do know of is he tried to steal a single cigarrete from the class 6 store. Those few cents of theft cost him hundreds in lost pay. Hilarious.
Got in trouble for putting magazines in his Interceptor Body Armore instead of the actual ballistic insets while on extra duty. (This for an Article 15 for disobeying a direct order
Wish I could remember his 3rd Art 15)
He was a rehabilitation transfer from my battalion to another in the brigade before the BDE deplayed as security forces for a year. Meaning basically he's a piece of crap but he just hasn't gotten a DUI or pissed hot or done something major to get rode out of the Army outright.
Scuttlebutt had it in my old platoon that someone would put a video of him talking about all his bullshit tall-tales on YouTube. I'll look for that online on leave.